I walk into Human Biology with a smile still on my face. Lunch with Mrs. Song had been enough to lift my spirits and now I had a class with my favorite teacher at Our Lady of Grace Academy. My belly was full of delicious homemade Korean food. I was ready to take on the world again. Ms. Ramirez is sitting at her desk, shuffling through a stack of papers. My smile widens as I walk over to her.
“Hey, Ms. Ramirez. How are you today?”
Ms. Ramirez looks up at me with a smile, “Tavia! I was so glad to see you on my attendance roster.”
I grin, “I’m happy to be here. I love the way you teach.”
Ms. Ramirez places a hand to her heart, “Thanks. I love the way that you actually pay attention to my lessons.”
We both share a laugh.
“I was surprised that you didn’t take my AP Physics class. You learned everything so quickly last year, I thought you would have appreciated a challenge,” Ms. Ramirez begins.
I try not to let my smile falter. I had skipped out on her AP Physics class in hopes of sharing a class with Ren. “Well, as you know, I’m going into Finance after graduation. I’m just taking AP math classes. I went with standard choices for English and Science so that I wouldn’t feel so overwhelmed.”
Ms. Ramirez nods, “Of course. I know you’d work yourself into the ground if you didn’t. It's great to prepare for college but you don’t want to burn yourself out.”
I nod, feeling a little guilty for stretching the truth a little. There was no way that I’d ever admit why I didn’t take all AP classes, especially not now that Ren had revealed his true colors.
“I’ll pick a seat and let you finish getting ready for class,” I say in an attempt to change the subject.
Ms. Ramirez nods, “Alright. You know me too well. Organization was never really my strong suit.”
I give her another smile and then turn around. More students have trickled in. I’m surprised to see Teagan sitting at one of the tables. The science lab is set up differently compared to the other classrooms. There are two rows of tables. Each table fits only two students. All of the tables face the board while Ms. Ramirez’s desk is at the back of the class to the right. I hesitate to walk towards Teagan. I’m not sure if she wants me to talk to her. To be honest, I’m not sure if I’m allowed to talk to her anymore. I look around the classroom and there's no sign of Brianna, Hannah, or Sophia. If they had this class too, they probably would have walked with her to class.
My heart does a weird palpitation. I want to talk to her. I want to know why she abandoned me like that. I don’t want to beg her to be my friend again. I guess I can understand why it’s easier for her to act as if she never knew me. The other girls probably understand her better anyway. A small part of me disagrees with that last statement. Part of why Teagan had liked me so much was because I was poor, because my background didn’t allow me to be a stuck-up snob. She got to impress me with things that wouldn’t have mattered to the other girls here. I had been impressed by how smoothly her family’s chauffeured car had driven on the road. I had been impressed by her massive six thousand square foot house that had felt empty even though it had been filled with expensive furniture and artwork. I had even been impressed by the little things, like her room, the ease with which she replaced scuffed shoes, and just the unburdened ease that she walked through life with.
In truth, I still wanted to be her friend. I didn’t care if she thought that I was embarrassing. I could be her secret friend. The kind she only talked to during one period at school and sometimes texted.
I finally make up my mind and decide to walk over to her. I stop at her side. Part of me wants to slide into the empty chair next to her but I remain standing.
“Hey, Teagan.” My voice has lost the high-pitch quality from earlier but it's still quiet.
She stiffens for a split second before continuing to dig through her backpack. “Yeah?”
I bite my lip at the forced uninterest in her voice.
“I just wanted to ask you about this morning. I know it’s Brianna’s first day and all but…” I break off before forcing myself to just rip off the band-aid.
“Are we still friends?”
“Sure. I mean like yeah. We can still be friends if you want. I’m kind of busy with Brianna, Hannah, and Sophia now but I’m sure we can find some time to hang out.” Teagan’s answer is really a non-answer. If I were to be brutally honest with myself, her answer is really a ‘no’.
I open my mouth and then close it again before asking, “Since when did you become friends with Hannah and Sophia? I thought you didn’t like them.”
It was true. Last year, Teagan had thought of Hannah and Sophia as self-invested brats. What had caused this change?
Teagan looks at me for the first time since I’ve walked over to her, “I never said I didn’t like them. Besides, I guess our parents know each other. They showed up to a party my family had hosted over the summer and I guess we’ve just been hanging out ever since.”
“You used to invite me to those parties,” I say quietly.
Teagan’s eyes flash with annoyance and maybe something else, “Yeah, I used to. Do I literally have to explain myself to you? That’s the problem with you. You were always clinging on to me. I needed space. I think you need some too because somehow you clearly have not gotten the hint. You need to find yourself and start thinking for yourself instead of following me around like a lost puppy all of the time.”
Teagan’s tone is exceptionally harsh.
I blink quickly. My heart aches at her words. I want to fall to the ground. I want to fall through the ground. I don’t know how I’m supposed to respond to that.
An arm slings over my shoulder but I’m too devastated to turn and see who it is.
“What’s going on, dollface? You don’t want to be my lab partner for the year?”
I turn and come face to face with Ren Takeshima.
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