I walked out of the subway with a pep in my step, the cold wind of early February stinging my cheeks. I didn't mind the cold or the wind as I usually do. I felt free, unburdened from the stress that had been weighing down on me for months. As exhausted as I was, I didn't feel tired, there was something freeing about paying off your debt. I have finally paid off my student loans. After my real estate agent came through for me last week. I was able to pay off all of my debts and most importantly I have paid off my parents debt. The sale of the house I inherited from my late parents went better than I expected.
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I don't even feel bad that I don't have much money leftover from selling my house. Only sadness that I couldn't keep it. It was the house I grew up in,where I had lived up until my college years. I had beautiful memories in that house. But I had to give it up. I couldn't keep it, not when I have debts to pay for. In the end I put it up for sale. Now I'm back to New York ready for the weekdays ahead.
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As I head to my building, where I've been staying since I came back from my parents' funeral. And Jules had helped me move from my old apartment in Brooklyn -where I was living since I left my home town of Parkville Missouri to- the closest borough to my workplace. It was a two storey apartment building, it's a decent place to live.
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And the rent is cheaper than most places around this area of the Bronx ,but it's safe and I like it. My place is a two bedroom apartment, a guest room, a living room with a half bath,and a medium sized bathroom attached inside the master bedroom. And a small open planned kitchen.
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The place is perfect for me, also with my job at Mont's bridal's I can afford it. Though I'm thinking of getting a roommate, so we can share the expenses. And I can save something for my future. Since I can't expect my late parents to pay off my rent as they sometimes do. They were exceptionally good parents, always trying to shelter me and helping out with rent and buying me clothes.
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It was why I moved out after college trying to find my place in the world. Don't get me wrong I love my parents to pieces, but due to my history they're over protective of me. But I wanted to be independent. Live,work, make my own mistakes and learn from them.
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When I told them I was going to New York, they didn't like that I was leaving Parkville. They tried to convince me to stay. I remember my Dad's saying.
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“Why would you leave Parkville and go to a place like New York Andrea? There are so many bad people there, it's a city of wolves darling, they would eat you for lunch.” I wasn't even angry when he said that, my reply was.
“I'm no longer a child, Dad. You can't protect me forever you know. And New York is no different than any other city. Also there aren't any wolves in New York, only people the same as you and I.”
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He didn't give up, he tried to change my mind. But when I stood my ground and counter, every word uttered to frightened me as if I was five. I knew it was his fears that were showing so I didn't hold it against him. They'd supported my decision in the end. My Mom was the one who helped me pack. She was more understanding than my Dad.
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Who was extremely worried about me living in the big apple without knowing anyone. My Mom was quick to point out that I was going to stay with her friend who also lived in New York, which earned her a glare from him. We'd burst out laughing then me and mom hugged him. His girls as he used to call us.
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Even after I'd left home they kept sending me money, trying to help in any way they could. I had to put my foot down and beg them to let me pay for my way in life with my hard work. They had done more than expected, they'd raise me well and had even paid for half of my college fees. It's time I learned to take care of myself and them, not the other way around.
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They'd both answered that they would try. But even so, whenever they came to see me or they found out I was struggling financially. They'd try to help without my knowledge, either send me money or they would leave an envelope with cash in it. And a little note in my Dad bold scrawl saying, think of it as a sign of our love, darling. They were amazing people and I loved them more than anything in this world.
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Then one dreadful morning I lost them, I lost the two most wonderful people in my life. The beautiful couple who had adopted a six year old girl-whose parents had abandoned her for days in a tiny apartment. Until a neighbor had called social services. Because they weren't capable of taking care of her and had chosen a life of crime above her. They weren't fit to be parents.
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Sarah and Paul hadn't just given me a home, they'd given me a future. They'd shown me what true love really is. Love can't be forced, it can't be bought. Love is giving freely, unconditionally. They'd given me all their love and care and now they're just…. gone.
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I had a perfect family but they were taken from me, now I only have myself to look out for. I don't have anyone. I had always wanted a sibling, someone I could bicker, fight and go to school with, and maybe rely on when life gets harder.
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But Sarah and Paul had never wanted another child. They had focused all their love and attention on me. They had once told me there are more children in this world that need care and love that they didn't feel the need to bring into the world. They also told me they never wanted me to feel like I wasn't enough, that's why they never adopted another child. So I was an only child.
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Losing them both at the same time hurt more than anything. It felt like my safe,perfect little world had shattered. I felt like the little girl I was when I'd been abandoned in foster care. While I only had a few glimpses of memories of my biological parents. Sarah and Paul's memory is forever branded in my very being.
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They'd each left a piece of themselves in me and to me they are the only parents I had, and love wholeheartedly. Sometimes blood isn't really thicker than water. There are a lot of parents that aren't deserving of the title. My biological parents certainly weren't.
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I remember to stop by the grocery store close by, and pick up a few things,milk, bread, fruits, some eggs and a bottle of wine to celebrate. I haven't been able to stay at home lately, I've been working hard, breaking my back so I can finally settle my debts and for once be rid of all the stress.
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Then last week I had to travel to Parkville to finalize the sale of the house. I just came back yesterday so I don't miss work. With the grocery bags, and my handbag in my hands,I walked the short distance to my apartment. The steps leading to the apartment were damp with remnants of this morning's snow. I rummage through the bag to find the keys to my apartment when I finally reach my door.
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After a few seconds I finally found it and opened the door, I locked the door, dropped my bag on the single loveseat in the sitting room and carried the grocery bag to the kitchen. After I've put everything in their rightful places. I went to take a shower, my bedroom is clean and cluster free.
The queen size bed is covered with soft blue bed sheets and blankets. I take off my clothes and enter the bathroom. I was lucky enough to get hot water. Sometimes I don't because my next door neighbor, who I'm beginning to suspect is a shower freak, always finishes the hot water which we shared before I come home from work. It's the only beef I have with the guy, otherwise he's not a problematic neighbor.
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Today's proving to be a good day for me. After 30 minutes of washing my hair, shaving my armpits, my nether region and legs, then soaping my body with my strawberry fruity body wash, I feel clean.
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I dressed up in my shorts and an oversized shirt,my hair in a messy bun, then went to the kitchen and made myself a cheese sandwich and poured a cool glass of orange juice. When I was full I sat on the love seat with a glass of wine and carried the TV remote and on the TV. This was the first time in a long time that I felt relaxed, ever since I lost both my parents in an unfortunate accident 4 months ago.
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And I had to leave to escape my ex boyfriend. I've been in so much grief, sadness and stress. I was lucky enough to have my current job to keep me busy after I came back. Living in Parksville without my parents is harder than I thought.
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With my parents gone and no relatives or close friends,I felt so alone, their loss hit me harder whenever I'd come into the house and there was no one to welcome me home with a warm smile. Or when I pass by their room. My jerk of an ex only added to my misery, coming to the house uninvited in the middle of the night to threaten me. That's why after I sold the house I left immediately, only saying bye to my immediate neighbors.
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Here in my apartment I don't have to worry about Jericho coming to threaten me any more. He doesn't have my current address which was a great blessing. I'm relieved I'm back. Tomorrow I have work. It's Tuesday. I've already set aside the clothes I'm going to wear for my first day since I've returned. I like getting there earlier than my boss. It helps me get some work done.
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I'm a designer at a bridal salon and I love my job. When I'm working it's just me and my imagination,creating beautiful wedding dresses is my passion. It's the only time I didn't think of my problems. I was so at peace after I'd drunk the last of my wine that I didn't know when I fell asleep in the living room on the couch.
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The loud thud and voices of several people I heard close to my ears startled me out of the peaceful sleep I'd fallen into. My heart beat a staccato when I saw him and his men. I was shocked into momentary immobility, there's no way I'm seeing things right, I couldn't believe my eyes.
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I got up from my lying position and scrambled away from the crazy ass man who is probably the devil's step son. I stared at him in terror wondering how he'd somehow found out where I live, and also found his way into my apartment without a warning.
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“What the hell are you doing here?How did you find out about my new place? And how dare you come into my home without permission.”
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Jericho smirks, he looks more sinister than before, my heart was beating frantically, scared doesn't even begin to describe how I felt. But I couldn't let him know that,he feeds off people's fear. I tried to school my features but all in veil, from my peripheral vision I saw one of his men go into my kitchen and started rummaging through my fridge.
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Throwing away the things inside, eggs, bread, vegetables all over the place, then taking a bottle of milk and guzzling it down. Milk dripped down his mouth and wet his shirt. It was disgusting. I flinched when he fling the carton of milk away and brought out the bottle of wine I'd bought hours ago, and started chugging it down. I didn't try to move, or try to stop him. I couldn't.
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Jericho was crouched right in front of me. He leaned closer from his crouching position to fist strands of my strawberry blond hair. His ice blue eyes darted from one eye to the other, he's a handsome man with long golden hair, and straight white teeth. He's dressed in a black suit with a red shirt,there's a long gold chain around his thick neck. The steroids have definitely changed his natural physique, he's more buff like a gym trainer.
If only he's a good man, he would have made a good husband to a lucky woman someday, once upon a time I could have probably been that woman. But no, Jerry had to follow in his evil father's footsteps, selling all kinds of drugs. Giving loans to the less fortunate or the desperates-like my late parents. Only to extort more money from them as interest. His voice cuts through my musings.
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“I don't need permission to collect my money from people who owe me Andrea.”
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I shuddered,Jerry had become a very frightening man over the years, the kind that would definitely gut someone in an alley if he said something that displeased him. Unlike the awkward teenage boy who was so obsessed with me years ago. But then maybe he still is. He'd tried on numerous occasions to make me sleep with him as payment for the debt, but I refused to have sex with a criminal as payment.
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“I have paid off all the debts my parents have taken from you, and as far as I know I didn't take a loan from anyone, except for the government, which I was lucky to pay off. And even if I'm in dire need of money I would never ask you to loan me money Jerry. Not after everything you've made me go through. You're shark loaners, you prey on the weak and needy.” I would never forget the threats and frightening tactics he'd used to scare me every night after my parents funeral.
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Coming to my home at midnight to scare me, touching me inappropriately as if he had every right. Sending threats messages of what would happen to me if I didn't pay up. It was hell waking up each night to find him and his thugs in my home much as he was doing now.
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The psycho laughed maniacally,for a long time. Still chuckling he brought his large callous hand that was glinting with golden rings to my face, then started trailing a path,with his index finger, his eyes were cold.
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“Well, your parents weren't as smart as you are doll, they came to me desperately and asked me to save them,when their business was failing, they needed my money to save it, I might not look like it…” he said, placing his other hand on his barrel chest.
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“Don't you dare insult them! They were humans who wanted to save their business by taking a loan. You took advantage of them. So they made a mistake by going to you. It didn't mean they deserve to be disrespected by the…” likes of you. I silently ended, Jericho ignored me and continued talking.
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“But I'm a softie at heart and we were once good friends, because of that. I loaned them the money, then they died without paying me back, that's seriously messed up. I have been patient with you Andrea, when you begged so prettily and promised that you'd pay me my money back in Parkville. Then I heard you sold their house, and left without settling their debts,you broke my trust.” His voice turned sinister.
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“I'm here to collect.” I was shaking my head, even before he'd finished talking.
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“But I have already paid your money, I gave the money to one of your men, Mark.” I said in a hurry remembering the beady eye man. Who came to my house the night before I left. The guy gave me the hibbie jibbies.
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“Yes Mark, I gave him the money two days ago before I left parkville.”
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“Unfortunately for you doll, Mark is dead. and I definitely didn't find any money on his fucking dead body, so that's null and void. You have two weeks to pay me back or I have a better paying job for you, on your back in one of my clubs. Or you could just marry me and make an honest man out of me.” He said closing in on me,his intention was clear he wanted to kiss me, I moved so fast out of his way I gave myself a whiplash. And stood behind the love seat.
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That it made his men cackled still holding the bottle of wine they'd empty. He sent them a hard glare and immediately they quieted down. Then he focused on me. His face angry.
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“We'll see how long you can run, little mouse.” He said ominously. I'll rather be shot in the head and die than marry this pig.
He and his merry band of rotten to the core friends, leave me alone to think about my dilemma, with a warning to have his money ready for him before the end of this month. I stared at the mess his men had made of my apartment and the wasted milk, vegetables and eggs on the floor.
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My eyes tear up as I went to look for cleaning supplies to tidy up the place.
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trouble does not begin to describe the kind of shity mess I'm in. Where will I get over a hundred thousand dollars from?
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