澄澈的白光透進窗簾,王芝蘭伸手放在頭髮上,緩緩張開眼,只見王父和王母坐到身側,王父拍了拍坐得太久而酸軟的腰骨,看見的女兒甦醒急不及待走出門外叫喊護士,王母叫停:「按聆叫醫生就可以了!快看她現在怎樣」。76Please respect copyright.PENANAZNsfygUxSF
76Please respect copyright.PENANAql3qF2Mpmo
王芝蘭摸著肚子,傳來饑腸轆轆的咕咕聲,飢餓得全身乏力,王母見狀便走到座椅的放置的袋中翻找,隨後遞上一盒飯,王芝蘭什麼都沒說,看見食物就逼不及待進食。76Please respect copyright.PENANAnR4KGwtnlW
76Please respect copyright.PENANA9XCn5aL8Ql
王父回到病房坐到椅子上,拿起水擰開瓶蓋喝水恢復神智,王母埋頭他耳邊輕語商量一些事,只待王芝蘭完食後他們才開口說話。76Please respect copyright.PENANA0ZBtpDnymk
76Please respect copyright.PENANAF9Isr9JzFV
王父:「你在路邊淋雨昏迷倒地,報紙檔老闆聽到聲音發現你,幫你call白車。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAGUStBAFtaP
76Please respect copyright.PENANAfCBGVwwlgA
王芝蘭神智還是有些許迷糊,只記得看到雜誌後精神受到巨大衝擊,身體承受不住就眼前一眼睡去,未回應什麼,王母也開聲說道:「你不舒服就休息幾日別上學,我們不逼你。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAmsoqwfNI6T
76Please respect copyright.PENANAwDCd260JUI
王芝蘭眨了眨眼,低頭看向床榻:「我現在什麼地方都不應該去。」 76Please respect copyright.PENANAycu0br5zwY
76Please respect copyright.PENANArRWXYFEIc9
話畢,醫生轉即走進病房,對幾人打招呼,幫王芝蘭做些簡單檢查,再說明當時她被送進醫院的情況,昏迷指數13屬於輕微腦震盪,需要留院觀察三天。76Please respect copyright.PENANATcKhasQRHa
76Please respect copyright.PENANA9oAVtZc9hF
王父招待醫生離開病房,王母的右手放到王芝蘭額頭量體溫,微涼的溫度傳到手指,說道:「沒發燒。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAxZ32pSO59o
76Please respect copyright.PENANAHivoJT6dP7
王父回來後說道:「那日沒陪你上庭,只是不想你有更大的壓力。」76Please respect copyright.PENANA6Id52tTWeY
76Please respect copyright.PENANAugWOdPq0ZZ
王芝蘭眼神只有平靜:「你們陪不陪我,所有人都覺得錯的是我。」76Please respect copyright.PENANA0kq5dzFD9h
76Please respect copyright.PENANAsogCEgewKb
王母:「那就由他們說去吧!最重要的是法官怎麼判。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAkserdcrgvd
76Please respect copyright.PENANAuREUKWfuCr
王父看了眼手錶,轉即問道:「你什麼時候覆診,這次我們陪你去。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAQSI6USl3Iu
76Please respect copyright.PENANAdiXNQHlIGi
王芝蘭對於突如其來的關心,雖然感到不可思議,心裡還有些彆扭地反覆拉扯著,可目前的情形別無他法拒絕,只能答應他們。76Please respect copyright.PENANAIAtrgvWKsq
76Please respect copyright.PENANA9fczxrHqf4
「下星期三」76Please respect copyright.PENANAmHY6SAPHn2
76Please respect copyright.PENANAUowsdZZdBX
「還有,媒體報導干擾案件進行,對我造成輿論壓力,能不能控告。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAb89QO6Sv9j
76Please respect copyright.PENANAewYnRf6cAO
王芝蘭心中掙扎一番,終於鼓起勇氣說出最著緊的事情,願意和父母坦誠說出這個想法,王父和王母亦願意正視這件事,一家人商量對策,力求最合理的解決方法。76Please respect copyright.PENANAa7L8ks2OQC
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——76Please respect copyright.PENANAajfaCZwGZy
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常康醫院精神科76Please respect copyright.PENANAROg88jhC8I
76Please respect copyright.PENANAz4MWDAO6Ia
王芝蘭在父母陪同下走進精神科門診,等待期間,王母感嘆兩年前女兒確診躁鬱症的時候,不斷覆診和吃精神科藥物,現在又來到這熟悉的地方,王父則走動觀看牆上關於精神健康的海報和宣傳冊。76Please respect copyright.PENANAZ62IvsQdKK
76Please respect copyright.PENANAUGPfFM3eK4
躁鬱症,又稱雙相情感障礙,躁狂和抑鬱同時出現的心理障礙,躁期發作的表現為情緒高漲、精力旺盛,鬱期發作的表現為情緒低落、失去動力,病患會經歷嚴重情緒波動,維持至少數週或數月。分為四類型,分別是雙相情感障礙一型、雙相情感障礙二型、急速循環、循環性情緒病。每一百個人之中,有一個人會患上此病,發病年齡多數於青年時期或之後。76Please respect copyright.PENANAe00GEJ3BKS
76Please respect copyright.PENANAQv1C4XidIw
處方藥物主要為鋰劑,作為情緒穩定劑,需要服用三個月或以上才能發揮作用,患者亦有機會服用多種藥物進行治療。76Please respect copyright.PENANAbxwWo6qzJB
76Please respect copyright.PENANAsLe3C6qE3r
家人及朋友可以做的事,就是嘗試耐心理解患者。76Please respect copyright.PENANA735iEwhppO
76Please respect copyright.PENANA3HMfyZX0oW
「王芝蘭」76Please respect copyright.PENANAtkS4Fzs6I6
76Please respect copyright.PENANA7aX1JZV8Xo
聽聞護士叫號後,王芝蘭離開走廊椅子走進房間,王父回到椅子坐下等待。76Please respect copyright.PENANA7lMZzIUals
76Please respect copyright.PENANAlV8pxc7qOb
經過一個月再來覆診,醫生也許知道這陣子她所經歷的事,難道還要一遍又一遍覆述嗎?76Please respect copyright.PENANAGnpqYHZWk6
76Please respect copyright.PENANAaQKYKlgCm2
心中難免有著忐忑不安,敲門進去房間後,只見黎醫生衣裝整齊,雙手搭在桌上,左邊是一疊文件。76Please respect copyright.PENANA1cDkhEHCfE
76Please respect copyright.PENANA5inLYl9Va7
見到王芝蘭的身影,黎醫生再次拿出病歷表:「很久不見,你最近的情緒怎樣?」76Please respect copyright.PENANAlvj3gIcyQ9
76Please respect copyright.PENANADMcTVMR3dV
從預備DSE期間患上躁鬱症,直至今年再次確診,一直是黎醫生負責王芝蘭的個案,每一次覆診都會循例問及近況、服用藥物後的狀況、情緒有沒有得到改善。76Please respect copyright.PENANA5t3FlKDpa1
76Please respect copyright.PENANA27s8Gsf04o
這次問及情緒狀況時,王芝蘭本想故作冷靜,可是每當談及已發生的事,一遍遍回想並親自說出這些難堪,心中仍不免掀起波濤洶湧的委屈,背對醫生掩面而泣,不斷深呼吸冷靜下來,再說出埋藏卻不能表達的憤怒。76Please respect copyright.PENANAJMvw7bxYmL
76Please respect copyright.PENANAKmUANUhdOy
黎醫生予以理解,沒有像外界一般判斷王芝蘭,亦沒有甩任何臉色,只說及釐清問題的根源就可以解決問題。76Please respect copyright.PENANARG6JASpbwl
76Please respect copyright.PENANA1i8GtOTHId
對於王芝蘭目前狀況,需要先繼續吃藥,若沒法根治要再考慮心理治療。76Please respect copyright.PENANANJXDlNL5oi
76Please respect copyright.PENANAFpJumeoRAp
這些年重複在痛苦中沉淪和掙扎,生活安穩時看似能將一切視為雲淡風輕,實則上隱形的傷口卻不時再次被撕裂滲血,成長大概就是不斷將自己狠狠撕裂再重新拼湊的過程,唯有嘗過死的苦,方能珍惜生的甜。76Please respect copyright.PENANAip2JnDwUDq
76Please respect copyright.PENANAVZuSPpSIUh
父母並不怎麼關心和理解自己的時候,或許希望得到來自外界的寬慰,其實醫生也只是把治病視為職責,並不十分真正了解患者的人生遭遇,予以醫治靈魂的關心。王芝蘭終於明白到,最重要的不是被他人所理解,而是誠實面對自己的心,願意表達心底最深處最壓抑的感受。76Please respect copyright.PENANA60EgvfEiJX
76Please respect copyright.PENANAbHEIrcG7DF
離開醫院時,有種莫名的衝動在心裡浮現,很想重新整理生命裡發生過的一切,不論是快樂的或是痛苦的,這些事情塑造了現在的我,只有坦誠面對才能消除對自我和世界的怨恨,重塑全新的自我。76Please respect copyright.PENANApMZ3HsOF1m
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——76Please respect copyright.PENANAsFhYWDsmuh
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到家後,王父和王母各自忙碌,一個在房間裡整理文件,一個處理食材預備煮晚餐。他們難得為了自己而平靜下來,這樣挺好的,起碼不再為雞毛蒜皮的事爭吵個喋喋不休。76Please respect copyright.PENANA564CYJlHWr
76Please respect copyright.PENANA1QpyQEaATm
看著母親疲憊的模樣,王芝蘭腦海裡忽然浮現了目睹她和父親爭吵的場景,每次都為了自己的前途爭論。對了,她本來擁有碩士學位的高學歷,結婚生孩子後只可以屈就小小蝸居做家庭主婦,所以拿出整付副心血將自己培養成才。76Please respect copyright.PENANA0SMBT8VEQI
76Please respect copyright.PENANAXbw68LTaNx
是的,父母為了養育孩子成人,讓他們有傑出的成就和前途付出不少心血,甚至對子女的期望就是讓他們達成自身沒有完成的夢想,王芝蘭接受了這個現實,又似是看透這些世間的無奈再也無力責備。76Please respect copyright.PENANAMQc5GYeUDp
76Please respect copyright.PENANAfdbPKCU1Hj
不久後王母烹煮好晚餐,三人盛飯後各自專心進食,看著電視機播放的新聞透視,平日的王芝蘭總是率先飽餐後放下飯碗回房間休息,這次竟然放慢了進食速度。76Please respect copyright.PENANAzhYq6YGIBD
76Please respect copyright.PENANAm5pawzOVzz
完食後,王芝蘭說道:「爸、媽,辛苦你們抽空時間陪我覆診。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAjQi9H5LvSA
76Please respect copyright.PENANAtSmF1qrFuS
王父和王母面面相覷,對於女兒難得和他們這樣說而驚訝,王父問道:「不辛苦,醫生說什麼了」76Please respect copyright.PENANAY3Ao0FBcj9
76Please respect copyright.PENANADOv3EJqegD
「只是聽我的狀況後,叫我繼續定時服藥。」76Please respect copyright.PENANARiqnfoGgFZ
76Please respect copyright.PENANAJTIlDVpsEK
王母:「這醫生會不會不夠專業,你想轉醫生嗎?」76Please respect copyright.PENANAv5beQ6c0ex
76Please respect copyright.PENANATbqmcGIwHK
「不用了,有時候靠人不如靠自己。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAyOfYygmZjg
76Please respect copyright.PENANAB30MvTbynP
王芝蘭也沒料到一時情急竟把心底話說出口,再補充說:「在我患病的時間,看著你們一直照顧我,很感謝你們,我會努力面對接下來的事,過好將來的生活,希望你們可以安心。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAtPXnUtb1QG
76Please respect copyright.PENANAxJEvuA4a5b
王母見狀也就點了點頭:「你開心就好。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAp6QMmb1FU1
76Please respect copyright.PENANAaSUobLzwmD
王父拍了拍王芝蘭的肩膀,收拾桌子後洗碗去。76Please respect copyright.PENANA9L9jtEw7UU
76Please respect copyright.PENANAt8O3nez2oK
王芝蘭回到房間,真是難得地可以和父母和平溝通,不禁鬆了一口氣。76Please respect copyright.PENANA0DDOoYKQxa
76Please respect copyright.PENANAuXHJc7j9Hk
坐在電腦桌前,拿出螢幕有些許裂痕的手機,想著看來是時候要換新的螢幕貼,按號後撥通電話:「鄧律師,我想和你商量一件事。」76Please respect copyright.PENANAfc4F2PfQuD
76Please respect copyright.PENANAXnvO2YCOOB
76Please respect copyright.PENANAnwMfYCOzXX