*Nate's POV*
It had been weeks since Sam and I stopped talking. She seemed to finally get the message, finally understood that I wanted nothing to do with her. At least, that's what I told myself.
It was exactly what I wanted. Distance. Space. The chance to go back to how things were before she showed up in my life, before she made me feel things I shouldn't be feeling.
Now, whenever we passed by each other in the halls, she didn't even try to meet my eyes anymore. No more hesitant smiles, no more quick glances. Just a cold, indifferent stare straight ahead, as if I didn't even exist.
And that was what hurt the most. I wanted her to stop looking at me like I was important, but now that she finally did it, I hated it.
At least Ashley wasn't upset anymore. Things between us had gone back to normal. Our routine of study dates, movie nights, and casual hangouts. I told myself this was the right choice. Sam was just some girl I barely knew, but Ashley was my girlfriend, the person I had been with for years. Prioritizing our relationship was the right thing to do.
Right?
Today, Ash wasn't at school. She had texted me this morning, saying she wasn't feeling well, so after class, I decided to surprise her. I picked up some medicine at the drugstore, grabbed her favorite snacks, and drove to her house.
As I neared the gate, my fingers drummed against the steering wheel, already picturing her reaction. Maybe she'd call me sweet, maybe she'd kiss me, maybe—
I stopped.
There she was, standing on her front porch. But she wasn't alone.
A guy was with her, standing too close, leaning in. And then, right before my eyes, she kissed him... on the lips.
What the fuck?
My head went blank. Everything in me went blank.
But then they hugged. And it wasn't just any hug. It was the kind that spoke of intimacy, familiarity... things that shouldn't exist between Ashley and anyone else.
My blood boiled.
Before I knew it, I was out of the car, slamming the door shut and storming towards them. Ashley's eyes widened in horror when she saw me, and the guy barely had time to react before my fist connected with his jaw.
"Nate, stop!" she yelled, grabbing my arm before I could swing again. The guy staggered back, holding his face. "Jesse, just go! Please!"
Jesse wiped his mouth, glaring at me. "You need to chill, man."
"Chill?" I barked. "You kissed my girlfriend!"
Ashley turned to Jesse, pleading, "Just go. Let me talk to him."
Jesse hesitated but nodded before walking off. My fists clenched, watching him leave, but then Ashley touched my arm again, pulling me inside the house.
Ashley turned to me, eyes already welling up with tears.
"Nate, please, let's talk inside."
I scoffed, but followed her in. As soon as the door shut behind us, I let loose.
"What the hell was that, Ash?" My voice was shaking with rage. "Who the fuck is he?"
She was silent, arms wrapped around herself. I was pacing now, unable to stay still, my body raging with fury and betrayal.
"Ashley!" I snapped. "Say something! Explain!"
Her breath hitched, and she wiped at her tears. "I'm so sorry, Nate."
"Sorry?" I let out an empty laugh. "You're sorry? You've been cheating on me, and all you have to say is you're sorry?"
"I—" She choked on her words, covering her face with her hands. "I didn't mean for it to happen like this."
"Then how the hell did you mean for it to happen?" I spat. "Jesus, Ashley, for how long? How long has this been going on?"
She squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head. Then, finally, she whispered, "A few months."
Everything inside me went still.
Months.
A laugh of disbelief escaped me. "A few months?" I repeated, stepping back like she had physically struck me. "So what, the entire time you were mad at me about Sam, you were sneaking around with this guy?"
Ashley flinched at Sam's name. "Nate, it's not—"
"Not what? Not what it looks like? Are you seriously gonna feed me that bullshit?"
She bit her lip, breathing unsteadily. Then, voice trembling, she said, "You're not innocent either."
I let out a sharp, bitter exhale. "Excuse me?"
"I saw how you looked at Sam."
I stilled.
Ashley met my gaze, something almost knowing in her expression. "I've known you for years, Nate. I know that look."
"That's not—"
"You liked her," Ashley said firmly, her voice breaking. "Maybe you didn't realize it, maybe you never wanted to admit it, but you liked her. And you pushed her away because you felt guilty about it."
My jaw clenched. "Don't turn this around on me."
"I'm not!" she cried. "I know what I did was wrong, but I also know we haven't been right for a long time, Nate. And maybe... maybe that's why it was so easy for me to fall for Jesse."
I didn't know what to say to that. I hated hearing it. I hated the way it made something in my chest squeeze tight.
I opened my mouth to argue, but no words came out. Because deep down, I knew she was right.
She sighed. "I was angry at first. But then I realized... Maybe we were never supposed to be together like this. Maybe we just dated because it made sense."
My breath hitched. I thought about all our years together, all the moments that made up our relationship. And the more I thought, the more I realized that so many of them had included Austin and Caleb. Our best memories were never just the two of us. We were partners, yes. But more like best friends playing the part of lovers.
I swallowed hard. "Do you love him?"
Ashley bit her lip before nodding. "Yes."
I nodded slowly. "Does he love you?"
"Yes. Very much."
For a long moment, I just stared at her. The girl I had spent so many years with. The person I thought I'd always be with. And suddenly, all I could think about was every memory we shared. Every laugh, every fight, every stupid inside joke.
And how most of them really did include Austin and Caleb too.
And maybe that was the answer.
I sighed, running a hand down my face before offering her a small, sad smile.
"Then go be with him."
Her eyes welled up again, and she let out a soft, broken laugh. "You're really letting me go?"
I exhaled, my voice soft now. "I don't think I ever really had you, Ash."
A few beats of silence passed before she whispered, "Nate... do you think we ever really loved each other? Like, romantically?"
I thought about it. Really thought about it.
At one point, I had been sure that I loved her. But now, looking back, was it really the kind of love that was supposed to last?
"Maybe," I said. "But maybe you're right. Maybe we were just together because it was convenient. Because it made sense."
Ashley sniffled, nodding. "You'll always have a special place in my heart."
"You too."
We both cried, but it wasn't the devastating, heartbreaking sobs I expected. It was almost... peaceful.
We hugged. A long, deep hug, and for the first time in a long time, I felt free.
As I turned to leave, she called after me. "Nate?"
I glanced back.
"Sam's a good person," she said softly. "You should apologize to her."
I didn't respond. Just nodded and walked away.
When I got home, I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling. My mind replayed everything. The years with Ashley. The way we fit into each other's lives so seamlessly, but never in a way that truly felt passionate and romantic.
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