"If you don't find him tonight, don't worry," my mother says pulling me from my thoughts. She must have seen the frown on my face, "It took me five years to find your father."
"One night a year under the full moon, it must be very easy to find the person I'll love for the rest of my life," I say and her face drops. I didn't mean to snap at her, but my nerves are on fire.
"You'll feel differently when you meet him," she says.
"I don't see how I could love a stranger," I say under my breath.
Mother smiles, "It's going to be a feeling you won't forget."
After hours of picking and pinning, Mother finally says I'm ready for the dance. Well, what she really said was, "My little baby is going to her first-ever Moon Dance! I'm going to cry!", but that's not really important.
The Moon Dances are heald in an old palace on top of Luna Moutain. The mountain is named for the goddess that gives us our powers and our mates. Every mateless wolf meets in a topless ballroom. The only light is the moon and the glow of the white castle reflecting back. Everyone is expected to wear beautiful clothes and masks. The idea is to dance with strangers until you find who you belong with.
I decline each dance offer. The thought of dancing with a stranger makes my skin crawl. I slip out onto an empty balcony. The sky is clear enough to count the stars. The sweet night air fills my lungs and I try to calm myself.
"Stop him!" a yell comes from behind me followed by loud footfalls and snarls. Adrenaline takes over and my body is pushed into my wolf form. The beautiful dress I was wearing in shreds at my feet. There go my hopes for calming my nerves. I look around for the person the guards are yelling about. About fifty feet away, someone is running across the balcony with a small bundle in their hands. 511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZFqwztnmI
What the hell, I'll help the guards and get revenge for this person ruining my dress all at once. I start running toward them. I happen to be the fastest in my class, I know I can catch someone on two legs. I smell blood on the guards. I guess they are injured.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKhiwozC69
Twenty feet. I'm fully prepared to rip them to shreds.
Ten feet. I'm closing in, my hunting instincts taking over.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW50tSjLYbB
Five feet. We lock eyes.
Brakes. Brakes. Where are the brakes? I can't hurt you. Stop. Stop. Stop. The smooth marble makes it impossible to stop and we both tumble over the side of the balcony. I know the ground is getting closer, but I can't take my eyes off this person. They look like they are yelling something. I don't understand. The wind is too fast. They pull me close pushing their mouth to my ear and my face into their neck. My nose, almost as if it has a mind of its own, starts smelling every inch of them. The smell reminds me of the chocolate chip cookies I would make with my nanny. Or the fresh-cut grass I would roll in when first learning how to control my form. Or the time right before a thunderstorm passes through.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MWQq9GTka
I'm so caught up in their smell I almost don't hear them screaming in my ear, "Phase, Dumbass!"511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8eSjnImRE
I force my wold back to the inside and feel their hands grip me tightly. There is a sudden pull and we are gliding safely to the ground. I try to see what stopped our fall, but I can't make it out. We land in a heap. I sit up to see the person with what looks like wings.
"How did you do that?" I ask.
"Magic," they say sarcastically just as I hear a mechanical whir and the wings begin retracting.
I stand a cool breeze on my skin. Too much breeze. I look down. Crap, my dress is back at the palace. I try to cover myself, but my skin glows like a beacon in the moonlight.
I hear a snicker and look up to see the person smiling at me. I can't see much of their face behind their hood, but their smile relaxes me and I don't feel as uncomfortable. Mother was right, this moon thing is a hell of a drug.
"Here take this," they say throwing me a blanket from their bag. "It's the least I can do for my mate," they say, their voice changing from amused to dark.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuaqNWe4s7f
I wrap myself in the blanket. "You know, since you've seen all of me, the least you could do is show me your face," I say, but when I look up they're gone.
The next few weeks are torture. I try to rationalize with my body. They were a stranger. I don't love them. I don't need to see them. But I know I'm just lying to myself. I want to see them. I want to feel them. I want them more than I'll ever care to admit. My only escape is to sleep. Each night a calm settles over me as I'm falling asleep. Maybe you can only put yourself through so much before you break.
As my body relaxes into my mattress, I feel the calm pass over me again as the floor creaks. I force my eyes open. A shadow silently crosses my room. Realization hits.
"Why do you only come when I'm sleeping?" I ask.
I hear them suck in their breath surprized. After a second they answer, "I'm not strong enough to stay away, but I don't want to hurt you."
"You're hurting me by staying away," I say, my voice partially muffled by my pillow.
They sigh, "I was afraid you would say that."
I turn slowly and look at them. They are wearing the same hood as before. I can feel their eyes on me as I slowly sit up and reach for their hood. I slowly pull it back suddenly afraid of what I might see.
Dark green eyes meet mine. They are strong yet beautiful. My eyes travel down to a cute button nose and full red lips. I stop myself from reaching up to touch them. Her face is framed in a mane of dark hair. It's surprising her hair even fit under the hood.
"You're a girl?" I say, not knowing what else to say.
She laughs nervously, "I guess I am."
She sits on the edge of my bed and takes my face into her hands moving her thumbs lightly across my cheeks , lips, and whatever else they could reach. "I shouldn't be doing this," she says, but from the look on her face, I knew she didn't want to stop.
"Why?" I ask.
She sighs and drops her hands from my face. I feel a deep pain in my chest. "You deserve someone who can give you a family and a life. Something I can't do."
The pain in my chest grew. Breathing became almost unbearable. "You can't. We can adopt. It doesn't matter. I want you."
She stands from the bed and starts backing away, "This is why I never went to one of those dances!" she says bitterly, "I knew I wouldn't be good enough for anyone I matched with. A common thief."
"Please?" I beg, but she isn't listening.
She runs her hands through her hair pulling on it slightly, "Just a common thief would be bad, but I had to take a swipe at that guard. Now he's dead," She looks me in the eyes, "I haven't phased since. I killed him. I won't do that to you."
"You were protecting yourself!" I say, trying to plead with her.
"And?" she says almost yelling, "He was a person. I'm a monster. You don't deserve a monster."511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1exsF64yUX
I feel the heat on my cheeks as tears start to roll down. It wasn't fair. I just got her. She couldn't leave me.
She turned to exit out the window. I grabbed her shirt, "Please you can't leave!"
"Nothing you can say will make me stay. I promise I won't come back. You'll live a normal life with normal people," she says, her voice slightly cracking.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunx3XZeykH
I feel the pain in my chest surge and I fall to my knees. My voice comes out in a low whisper, "I- I love you."
Her voice is as hard as a rock, "I wish you didn't." 511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2nos7RY6yS
She disappeared into the night leaving nothing behind but me and the moon.
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