「知道危險是什麼嗎?不自制的溫柔」113Please respect copyright.PENANAxvFMTG4i69
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關上門,崔然竣無神的靠在門上,情緒其實還沒平復,不過身邊沒有人好像也就被關起開關了停止哭泣,已經很久沒這麼哭了。113Please respect copyright.PENANALyjfVYv14B
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距離上次哭是因為她患了大病,倒也沒有這麼嚴重的哭著,哭到眼睛都覺得腫腫的,老實說,為了自己的事情而哭泣倒是第一次。113Please respect copyright.PENANASoAZqOSS8X
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不是受限於性別,崔然竣知道男生也是可以有脆弱的時候,但這個目標是僅限於自己以外的男性,『我不能哭』是為了專心於其他事情而限制自己的情感抒發。113Please respect copyright.PENANA9bp62E7z98
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被迫放棄夢想的人,是很難受的,有過經驗的,都能懂那種在心裡的悶痛,那是你花了很久時間用不同建材一步步堆砌出來的高塔,而夢想就是你在高塔頂端照亮你世界的那個星星,碰到星星的時候一切都值得。113Please respect copyright.PENANAUtaUQoH1Nt
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每個人的夢想都是一顆顆在夜空的星。113Please respect copyright.PENANAWUF1254SDv
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最後匯集成銀河。113Please respect copyright.PENANAurbY7lvw4X
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好好的讀書,好好的培養能力,在課堂間填寫學習單裡,毫不猶豫的填上夢想,在同樣年紀時,別的孩子都在苦惱著要當警察或是醫生,崔然竣是第一個繳交學習單的,他是邊哼著小調邊走過去交的。113Please respect copyright.PENANA4lUJUd8hBu
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硬要比較,崔然竣是更可憐的例子,他原本也只是普通的培養著,家人們也支持著甚至讚許,灌注這個小幼苗,直至金融風暴過後,大人的世界出現了變化,交頭接耳的時候變多了,他們常常看著一疊文件,眉頭深鎖,他們也常看著帳本喟嘆。113Please respect copyright.PENANA4t2T9VwmJb
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「可以繼續實現夢想嗎!」113Please respect copyright.PENANAqpo4aoJISI
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「我能繼續完成夢想嗎?」113Please respect copyright.PENANA0qof8XFDMb
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「憑什麼我不能繼續?」113Please respect copyright.PENANAu4cIkx2cNr
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「...」113Please respect copyright.PENANABGhHuB0c5r
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「好,我會放棄夢想的。」113Please respect copyright.PENANAhgKybHMmWX
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『乖,懂事的孩子』113Please respect copyright.PENANAPsVR2JQ525
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十五歲問了一次,十七歲問了一次,十九歲問了最後一次,挨打了。『你要繼續不懂事嗎?』『你沒資格完成你的夢想』,十九歲的少年不解,為什麼一記耳光後,他們要說出這種話,「既然沒辦法,就不要囂張著說要幫我完成。」113Please respect copyright.PENANAvVSQOaDkV8
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明明有把課業維持在標準,甚至在標準之上,明明有把家務事分擔好,甚至是自動自發,沒有狐群狗黨,沒有談情說愛,一切情感壓抑都在為了夢想鋪陳,「到底憑什麼說我沒資格?」113Please respect copyright.PENANATvsTP8KAGh
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那時年輕氣盛,或許是這份阻撓讓崔然竣覺得他必須對抗,身兼數職,每天返家,甚至還能夠把家務做好,而且得更好,然後課業也不輸給任何人,崔然竣就是這樣,越是覺得我不行,我就證明給你看,而且我能夠好。113Please respect copyright.PENANA9zdXKWkrcq
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於是在這場抗爭之中,真正的崔然竣不復存在。113Please respect copyright.PENANANd4Derjelc
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他清楚在他們眼中這不過是自己的本分,不會因為自己做的更好,曾經贊同的家人就會如前。破碎的事物要補救早就來不及。113Please respect copyright.PENANA1wlpNGiByR
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所以我就默默成為我想成為的人那就好,讓別人失望不是自己能夠控制的事情,所以不讓自己失望是最後的底線,所以,崔然竣已經很久沒跟家裡聯絡,從索性搬出家裡後。113Please respect copyright.PENANA4kEeLnjBbO
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不過現實終究比什麼熱忱來的快而且殘忍,她生病了,「畢竟還是自己的媽媽」滿足了自己的夢想又怎麼樣?養育之恩還是在,生命在時間面前不過脆弱,耀眼敵不過悲歡離合。113Please respect copyright.PENANAfIi8IptBN9
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這世界是這樣的,你愈是懂事,越沒有人心疼。113Please respect copyright.PENANAIF9TSno86S
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這麼大量的情緒釋放,像開槍一樣,不是在子彈飛出的硫磺味嗆鼻,而是後座力過於猛烈,「好希望他在這,不用說話。」崔然竣想著,第一次這麼難過,也是第一次這麼希望有人陪他。希望兩個字裡藏著那穿著襯衫,笑開來有酒窩的那人名字。113Please respect copyright.PENANAeX3i4tWA0U
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TBC113Please respect copyright.PENANADP6HCxnIO4