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We take a few last steps between the massive tree trunks surrounded by branched shrubs and finally reach our destination. The moment we come out from under the dense canopy of treetops, a fresh night breeze slightly brushes against my face and fluffs my ashy blond hair. The big soft waves I got from my mother fall back on my shoulders and I take a cautious look around.
Number of small bonfires are illuminating the large forest clearing with one big bonfire in the middle of the open area. Its flames are dancing up toward the June starry sky, no clouds in the view. The night is perfectly clear.
"Oh my..." Idony breathes out next to me. Her blue-green eyes are wide and sliding over the crowded place. Dozens of people of the whole Northwest has gathered here, in one of the four most important nights of the year. The night of the Mate Harvest.
Auden stops at my other side and my startled gaze instantly finds him. He quickly observes the place, not so astound by the view since he was there several times, and then he looks at me. He pursues his lips in a tense smile and holds his hand in the air, indicating that we should continue.
Idony obeys her brother and they head toward the central fire, but I remain standing. My eyes are flying furiously over the bonfires, the people, the clearing. The impression it gives is somewhere between magnificent and anarchy.
A soft hand appears on my upper arm and gives it a caress. I meet my mother's gaze, and she smiles at me encouragingly, the light from the nearest bonfire mirroring goldenly in her warm nut brown eyes. She gestures to the clearing with her chin.
Turning my attention back ahead of me, I swallow. We start through the crowds and my gaze stays shortly hanging on some of the people as we are passing them. There are many girls dressed like me, in long white dresses resembling nightgowns. Among their family members that came here to support them tonight, they look like fairies. I quickly check my own gown and wonder how I look.
Eventually, we catch up with Auden and Idony, right before we come to a stop at the main bonfire. The heat is radiating from it, pleasantly warming my face. I am not given much time to enjoy it, though.
"Carys and Idony, from the Pine Valley pack," Auden reports to the man in front of us.
The stranger inspects Idony and then me from head to toe and gives a curt nod. He swipes through papers with list of names. "Carys and Idony, Pine Valley's," he confirms and puts the papers down. "Your place is over there," he points to the furthest fire. "We will start soon, so get ready. Next," he calls, and I look over my shoulder. There is already another girl with what I guess is her older sister. She is looking at the ground and what I can see of her expression tells me enough of why. She looks terrified.
Auden turns around and puts his hand on my lower back, the other one on Idony's, to guide us gently to our assigned bonfire. I feel my heart beating but its's also as if something is pushing against it to calm it down at the same time. I am nervous. Auden must sense it because his gaze slides to me. I give him only a glance.
"Okay," he says as we stop at the opposite edge of the clearing than where we came. "We'll have to leave, but you have nothing to worry about," he gives us both a meaningful look. "They rarely choose a young wolf that is here for the first time."
Yes, that's what they say.
Once wolves reach the age of eighteen, they are obliged to attend the next Mate Harvest that takes place after their birthday. I turned eighteen just a week ago so for me, it is the night of summer solstice. It is ironic how the shortest night of the year feels longer than any other in my life has felt to me.
On these nights, male wolves come to look for a mate. Or wife, to be exact. Though the word mate is still in use, it's been a long time since anyone actually saw a true mate bond. Wolves have evolved and their human side has become more pivotal which has its perks, but our capability to form a mate bond defined by the nature itself has nearly vanished.
"But they can," Idony half states, half asks.
Auden hesitates. She knows the answer, we all do, and he knows it. "Yes, they can," he admits.
Alright, it doesn't matter that I have already known, my heart still skips a beat and sends an uncomfortable feeling over my chest.
"You're an Alpha's daughter. They would be dense to choose you without having a word with you and our father." At this, Idony nods, visibly a little more comforted. Me, on the other hand...
Auden realizes it and meets my gaze. Now he's at his wit's end. He is trying to come up with something that would put me at ease, but honestly, there is nothing.
I don't dispose of the advantage of having an Alpha's blood running in my veins. My only hope lies in the fact that though wolves still have to participate in this three years in a row until they are of age of twenty, which used to be considered the best years for mating, male wolves usually respect the right of she-wolves to make a free choice today. It doesn't mean they can refuse the male's decision, but we are a bit more like modern humans nowadays. Men often only come here for exploring what wolves are available for a potential alliance and then discuss the partnership beforehand. Sometimes, when the person is lucky, there is even some dating. But still, many wolves leave the Male Harvests with a surprised soon to be bride or groom. It kind of kills this little hope of mine.
"They're not going to choose a freshly adult wolf," are the words that fall out of Auden in the end.
That's the best he can do? With my mouth set in a line, I give him a look.
The first vibrating sound of a gong floods the forest clearing. For a second, the noise around subsides but then, it gets louder than before.
My mother takes me by my shoulders and gives me this look that tells me I am her sweet little girl. "Aw, my puppy," the warmness of her eyes makes them almost melting. She pushes me against her into a tight hug. When she releases me, the feeling of safety I had for a few seconds disperses. With one hand still on my shoulder, she takes my cheek in her palm. "Look at you, you're all grown up." She leans a bit forward and quietly adds, "No matter how this night ends, you have to take it as a blessing."
That is one way to go, reminding me it is our culture.
I take it back, Auden's unsubstantiated it will be alright promise wasn't so bad after all.
"Devora?" Auden addresses my mother.
She smiles at me with so much love that she could provide the whole world with it and still have enough left for making me feel this way. Unconditionally loved.
Letting go of me, she takes a step back, but a sudden fuss diverts my attention away from this moment. And by right.
The whole clearing dives into the grave silence. All eyes are on the opposite side of the clearing.
There, emerging from the darkness behind the trees, several wolves are making their way through the clearing. They don't falter in their steps, completely unbothered they are watched by everyone. People take steps back to clear the way for them, but some of them recedes purely out of the need to get further away.
There are at least ten wolves holding behind one in front. The one that has not look around once. His hard, emotionless gaze is pointed forward, completing the trembling feeling I've got from him that gives me goosebumps. His demeanor is unyielding, tough, demanding. He is walking like the force of nature. One that feels like direful earthquake.
"What is he doing here?!" Idony hisses at her brother when whispering starts slowly booming all around. Auden's dark eyes still haven't left the man who has caused the atmosphere here to completely change. "I thought he never visited the Harvest!"
My mother's hand goes to her moon necklace, a family heirloom that has been protecting our family for generations, and she squeezes it firmly in her palm. With that, my nervousness transforms into something very close to being frightened. I turn my gaze to Idony whose eyes holding about as much fear as mines are already on me. We share a look and turn back to the newcomers.
For someone who did never visit a single Harvest, he sure doesn't look taken aback, surprised, something such as nervousness is absolutely out of question. And for someone who is visiting the Mate Harvest, he certainly doesn't look interested.
He still hasn't sneaked even a peak to any girl. I am able to tell what wolves are going to participate tonight just by taking that one journey through the clearing. Those who came here tonight to find their potantial partner have been studding intently every girl in a gown in their view.
The gong sounds again, making me jump this time.
I let out a startled breath and turns toward my mother. Love is not what would define her expression right now. Her smile is uncertain, just like her playing with her moon pendant with her fingers. She gives one gentle stroke to my shoulder and then tries to smile at Idony before she exchanges a quick look with Auden and starts heading away, alone.
When she is gone, Auden sends his hand over his heart shaped jaw. "Look, it doesn't have to mean anything."
Idony's mouth opens, but she just shakes her head in disbelief and turns aside. She is still an Alpha's daughter after all. And I?
Auden turns to face me, once again not knowing what to say to make this better for me. I look at the man – wolf – in question, though, dressed all in black. He is talking to the organizer of tonight's Harvest, his attention fixed purely on the man. His sharp squared jaw with dark fine stubble is moving as he speaks while turning something silver in his hands at the level of his lower abdomen. His black T-shirt is tight enough for me to say he is in a great shape and his solidly looking arms give more than a sufficient idea of how strong he must be in his wolf form.
An exemplary male wolf. But more importantly, an exemplary Alpha.
I chuckle at the absurdity of Tarquin, the Alpha of the wolves from the Silver Meadow, the most feared pack far and wide, and a girl like me.
I look back at Auden, much calmer. "I'm really not afraid of this," I say, my words underlined with an audible ridiculousness of this idea.
Auden frowns and his eyes bounce between mines in confusion. He is looking at me like I am missing something.
"What?" I ask him.
Auden's frown deepens as he inhales to answer me, but another upheaval in voices around cuts all our lines of thoughts.
Tarquin has finally started to look around, that's where the sudden panic in all voices comes from. He thoroughly scans everything in the clearing and then he and his men head away, most probably to get ready for the beginning of the Harvest.
Auden lets out a sigh and his hand slides over his chin. "I have to get going. You should go to your spots." He nudges his chin towards the fire behind Idony and me. Giving us both the last worried look while visibly contemplating something, he nods and walks away.
As we head for the bonfire, Idony reaches for my hand and holds it squeezed between hers until our paths part. I take a deep breath and go to the left side of the bonfire where I take a place between two already prepared girls. I turn around to face away form the burning fire, straighten my back, put my hands along my body and stick my chin forward. My chest lifts with a deep inhale.
I would be ready if I didn't notice Auden stopping in his track out of the corner of my eyes. I break my pose and look at him. He is holding his chin again, conflicting expression on his face. He swears quietly under his noise then and instead of out of the clearing, he starts toward the organizer.
He is going to participate?
Puzzled, I shoot a look over the fire to Idony. Even more confused than me, she shrugs, not understanding what is going on either.
The third ring of the gong spreads across the clearing, bouncing off the trees on its edge, putting everything to silence. I take the pose again and swallow, my nervousness reaching its highest peak.
With the last vibration of the gong dissipating, the Harvest organizer steps forward, his hands now free of any papers. Spreading his arms wide, he takes one way around the main fire while shouting, "Wolves of the Northwest, welcome to the Mate Harvest, here on the night of summer solstice." He comes to his original spot and puts his hands down. Without any further delay, he announces, "May the nature be on your side."
With these words, men and a few women start appearing from all sides of the clearing. Each fire is surrounded with twelve girls of all kinds of packs. The participants are slowly rounding one fire after another, looking closely at each of the girls.
The dry night breeze rises, turning into a light wind. My gown quivers with every stronger gust, my hair flying around my head. It tickles my shoulders which my gown leaves partly naked, starting with sleeves underneath them. The whole gown is simple, it is snow white without any pattern, reaching to my ankles, but there is a strip of soft transparent lace a few inches above the bottom edge. It is slightly loose, especially from the waist down, but the sleeves are tight, ending above my elbows.
The first man comes to me. I hold my gaze down, but I can see he is quite young. He slows down, almost stopping for a moment in front of me. I try to keep my breathing even, but my heart is racing. I can feel his eyes sliding over my body and though there is some wolf part in me that finds it somehow normal, I think I don't like it.
I release a breath when he continues to the girl next to me. His place is replaced by another man, a little older one this time, and he is followed by others and others. I stop perceiving who is in front of me. It goes like this for a while and eventually, I start feeling more at ease. I even dare to raise my eyes from time to time and check the clearing.
Every time I do look around, my eyes end up on Auden. I don't understand why he decided to stay here. He went through this a few times, even after the compulsory years, and he didn't necessarily find it appealing, this old school way of choosing a partner. I have always understood why, tradition or not, but it is something deeper than a simple understanding now.
Another steps sound around my fire, so I lower my gaze. The more they are approaching me, though, the more a wave of unpleasant feelings arises in me. It quickly turns into anxiety, sending shocks through my chest and belly. My head starts tingling, and the feeling travels down my spine. Breathing suddenly becomes harder.
I can't explain why my nervousness has returned, I blame it on my head and thinking too much when it comes to miserable feelings. As if my own mind wants to bathe me in them at all cost. It is annoying. And ridiculous. I try to calm down again, but then it all gets worse.
Something takes a tight grip over my stomach and sends it up my throat. My chest feels like it is flooded with an acid, my entire body is burning from inside. My view starts spinning and then becomes steady, then it is spinning again.
Questions I've never asked fills my head. What if I feel like I am going to faint? What if I feel nauseous? What if I need to sit down? Should I raise my hand? Should I simply leave? Would it be too rude to sit on the ground? What if I am such a nerve wreck that I can't simply handle this? Has it ever happened?
A tall figure taking slow steady steps appears in my peripheral view, and all hell breaks loose. I can't keep my head up, I am feeling like I am being drowned after a long marathon. I try to stop the frantic shallow breathing but vainly. Panicking, I look up, and my chest stops moving.
The moment his eyes land on me, he stops death in his steps. We stay staring at each other, and it is as if someone put a mirror between us, our expressions reflecting each other perfectly. With our eyes locked, everything I felt slowly fades away, only a hint of it left. An intriguing wave of fulfillment slowly fills my head, my chest, my stomach, my entire body, every tiny corner of my soul.
At this moment, I realize it.
I am confounded, my head barely manages to process it, my thoughts are running a thousand times faster than usual, making it harder for me to think, but there is still something so magnificent and literally breathtaking to it.
I found my mate.
Coming to the same conclusion, he closes his slightly opened mouth and swallows. His lips pursue back in a thin line and his eyes, suddenly out of the shock and fully capable to perceive the world around, narrows at me, the brows above them forming a frown. He searches my eyes and my eyes only, not ogling my body like the others, and yet it's this what sends a shiver down my body.
He doesn't miss it. He presses his lips even tighter together. And then, his expression hardens.
He clenches his jaw, eyes deadly serious, and while the world is spinning from beneath me, Tarquin takes a step back. His eyes suddenly slide to the girl next to me. He offers her his hand and his deep, smooth voice kills something inside me I wasn't even aware of when he tells her decisively the one single word.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8pLgb7ZeN
"You."
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