Crying my Heart Out, Is that Even an Option ?169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFtrvf8Iort
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Throughout my childhood, the majority of my time was spent within the confines of school. Some days were bearable, while others were downright miserable.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfKDuMtu1YJ
It's not that I lacked anything per say, but rather that I felt an overwhelming desire to escape. I yearned to be at home, away from the confines of the educational system. I was just a young child, barely eleven years old at the time.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpZ3ty77a6z
I believed that the world would be better off without me, and so I cried incessantly. A few girls whom I knew attempted to lift my spirits and assisted me in writing letters home, as I didn't know how to do so myself. Yet, their efforts seemed insufficient. Despite their support, I found myself unable to contain my tears, and cried through most of my school days.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbimjPyQ7g
Initially, I would weep in their presence, but soon I grew wary of overstaying my welcome with my tears. Consequently, I sought solitude on the balcony, where I could cry quietly, concealed from prying eyes. I even tried washing my face after each bout of crying, but my telltale red eyes betrayed my emotional turmoil.
It slowly dawned on me that tears can only flow for so long before they run dry. I had to learn to suppress my tears, for the people who used to console me had departed for another school. It was time for me to grow up.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Wz3eQDi8s
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On the first day of a new term, I was dropped off at school. Once I had settled my belongings, I ventured to the dormitory to see if any familiar faces had returned. Standing at the door, I spotted someone I knew, making her bed. I decided to surprise her, sneaking up quietly.
However, my well-intentioned surprise turned into a painful mishap as I accidentally hit my head on her bunk bed. I silently retreated from the room, heading straight to the bathroom when I noticed blood trickling down from my forehead.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMo1UEVURo
Unbeknownst to me, she had noticed the trail of blood I left behind and followed it to the bathroom. She assured me that she would clean up the trail and then join me in the bathroom. I know she was my friend, but she really didn't have to do that, probably she wasn't even done making her bed when she noticed that.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKMMQpx0nU
Believing that washing away the blood would resolve the situation, I stepped into the shower, still wearing my yellow-brown casual uniform. To my dismay, the bleeding showed no signs of abating. I know that I was supposed to be in a world of hurt, but frankly speaking the cut was painless. Just numb, simply put, a tap of the red liquid that wouldn't stop gushing out. 169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjByyCFmc2
Amidst the ongoing shower, she returned to the bathroom accompanied by the school matron, with several curious onlookers trailing behind. The bathroom quickly filled with people, while the blood continued to flow from my head.
The matron suggested that I submerge my entire head under the shower, hoping it would stem the bleeding. I followed her advice, but to no avail. She then proposed that I immerse my entire body, yet even this proved futile.
As the water cascaded over me, the blood seemed to intensify, drenching my uniform. The commotion in the bathroom escalated, and I couldn't help but find it unnecessary for so many people to abandon their tasks just to witness my catastrophe. Seriously, was it such a big deal ?169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4buLOkak7U
Strangely enough, I didn't shed a single tear nor did I feel any pain. The gravity of the situation hadn't fully sunk in, and I remained unperturbed by the fact that I could potentially bleed myself dry. What struck me as odd was the exaggerated reaction of those around me. It didn't seem like such a monumental catastrophe to me, as I believed the bleeding would eventually cease on its own.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡakpNPbmvbz
With no other options at her disposal, the matron hurried to the sick bay and retrieved gauze pads. She returned with an armful of them, instructing me to close the shower and place the gauze on my forehead. I followed her instructions, but the blood seeped through the gauze at an alarming rate. She then led me to the sick bay, where additional supplies awaited.
Upon entering the sick bay, I encountered a bustling scene of parents and their children packing belongings into wardrobes lining the room. I quietly took a seat and listened as the matron informed me that if the bleeding persisted, I would need to return for fresh gauze. She replaced the blood-soaked gauze pads and secured a band-aid around my head.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgcBjiQznE
Well, that day was certainly an unforgettable experience for everyone else.
As for me, it hardly bothered me at all. Surprisingly, I felt no pain whatsoever. My head didn't ache, nor did I experience any discomfort. Blood simply spilled forth incessantly, seemingly for its own amusement. Furthermore, my sole intention had been to greet the girl I knew, and the fact that I inadvertently injured myself didn't faze me in the slightest.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLOoAGgX0Es
As it turned out, this wasn't my first encounter with injuries, and I might had grown accustomed to underreacting. Perhaps my tendency to get hurt had diminished my pain tolerance, I don't know. I realized that crying after sustaining an injury was not an absolute necessity. There were even moments when I would go days without noticing wounds until they were close to healing.169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiB5prWKUGt
