Her eyes were the finest crystal blue. They were just as cold as her expressionless face; as if she had nothing but an empty void inside. Her long, black hair rustled in the air beside her every so often. She wore our blue and silver school crest on her velvet black, long-sleeve, v-neck sweater dress that reached halfway down her thighs. Her dress outlined and further defined her beautiful figure. Her creamy white skin seemed even paler in contrast to her dress. She looked so tall, slim, and not to mention breakable. It was as if the slightest disturbance could unfold her completely. The way she stood on top of the street light with her bare feet made her look awkwardly fragile and wary. Flashing lights flew by in the background behind her, causing her face to shift in and out of the shadows as she stared down at us in the narrow, smoky alley.
I felt my breath catch in my throat when her cold, crisp, glare caught my eyes. Every hair on my body stood on end. I went numb in less than a matter of seconds. In the back of my head, somewhere, I felt someone tugging on the sleeves of my black hoodie. It was a signal for me to head back into the club. The others already started to head back in through the propped door, but I couldn't move, I couldn't look away. I was captivated by her gaze. There was something about it, no, something about her that compelled me to get closer, as if there was a need for me to step into her world. My own senses were already out of my reach then. It was like looking into the eyes of the Greek creature Medusa. I felt a maliciously strong force place hold on everything within me, and then the full strength hit me before I even realized what was happening.
My eyes grew wide as my breath escaped me, leaving behind a crispy cold tingle on the surface of my taste buds. I felt myself keeling over with a gasp. The sight of her slowly blurred and faded to nothing. I saw the space around me warp at my feet. The floor was caving in on me, then nothing took any form. I felt the cold cement through my black skinny jeans. Blurring lights seeped in through the corner of my eyes, continuing to blind me and make my head spin. Voices surrounded and pounded against my head. Cold hands placed a hold on my upper arms to keep me up as I slumped down. The cold air filled my head and crackled around me. Crisp air filled my lungs, drowning me. My throat burned as my breath started to quicken, and then faded as I struggled for my last attempt to hold onto the world around me. Sadly, even the last strand broke. There was nothing to hold me up and prevent me from my fall
Everything blended into chaos, then faded into nothing but a buzz in the back of my head. Everything met with complete darkness for seconds on end. Then slowly an image formed as my little brain cells slowly regained some recognition. It was just me in the fetal position in an endless black space. Nothing could reach me, nothing could touch me. I became her prisoner. It was just me and the warp space with dark patterns constantly changing around me in blues and purples. I was lightly dozing off in a warm, sleepless, rest. There was only the single memory of her cold, crisp blue eyes constantly watching me without an inch of recognition of my being ever existing. To her I was just another doll that never made it through her game, just like the others, and satisfaction ceased from entering her soul. Her eyes only mirrored the hollowness of her cold, empty, unsatisfied, sorrow filled soul.
Yet in her eyes. . . it was the sharp edge that dredges up all the unspoken fear that had been sealed away, made numb over the years. Have I vanished from the face of humanity, forgotten about without a trace? Is this it? Have I been lied down in the hands of death itself, waiting for my soul to be eaten by all the sins I've ever committed. The lies that spewed out of my mouth endlessly, the hatred that burned and smoldered my heart, the corruption that has been tainting my soul, has it all come to claim their prize? Between the self consumed poison from one drag to the next, has it decided it was time to end this self implicated intoxication?
But I didn't want to die...I just wanted to go away for a while. I just wanted the pain to go away. "I didn't want to die" I screamed into the emptiness. "I don't want to die" I cried. I just didn't want to be drowned by reality like everyone else in life. "NO!...no...no" I whimpered alone, no tears accompanied me.
I'll never tell a lie again, I'll quit smoking, I'll lay off the drugs, I'll stop getting beat up for stupid logic less reason, just please...please don't let me die.
Cold, raw panic took over me again. A burning that seemed to have carved a hole from my insides, turned my stomach inside out, climbed up into my lungs, smoldered it into blackened ashes. Air caught in my throat, not willing to escape. It expanded, pushing against the very skull, tore at it, clawed through it. Something is at my throat. NO! My hands! They will not listen, only gagged me harder as I will it to stop. Air burst through my eyes, liquid, is it blood, glazed my eyes, and continues to run down my face.
I can't die now... I promised.
Endless collage of faces flashed past.
Not now.
"It's pointless" came a cold emotionless voice. "Humans have a weak will to live. It's much easier to just give up...it always was"
I couldn't see right, vision was far too blurred for recognition, but through the few lights and shadows that cheated it's way into my vision, I could make out that girl, that same girl.
No, it's not true.
"Everyone has given their lives so willingly, and yet right before they step off the edge, they panic and try to pull back" her voice was soft but still harden by emptiness "but you know what happens when they panic?" she paused only a moment as she spoke over the gags that escaped through my self inflicted pain, "they all fall off" and as if to deliver the last blow, she said bluntly "they die".
Then, suddenly my vision started to register what was in front of me as my eyes widened. In between her long slender fingers and palms was a scythe. Light reflected off the blade and flashed off, blinding me.
"NO!" I screamed, I felt all confinements loose its hold. The intangible force shattered to pieces reflecting the shocked and angered face mirroring on both of our faces. "I will not die." I croaked into the dark as I seeped into darkness, "I will not let you have me". 629Please respect copyright.PENANAUdno7IPcu5
"I promised I'd change my life around" Everything faded , leaving me unsure if anyone heard my last whimper.629Please respect copyright.PENANANhofsQG4ql
With that thought, I bolted wide awake in the arms of humanity. A group had formed around the narrow alley. I rolled out of someone's arm, onto my side, hovered over the frostbitten ground. I was breathing hard, gasping even. My eyes felt like they were going to roll out on me. Light rushed in all at once, blurring my sight. Pressure exploded inside of my head. Feeling a bit queasy, I darted my eyes around the crowd. My brain still tried to process what was going on. At first it was silent, seconds later the surrounding panicked voices hit me hard, practically crushing over me like a boulder. The voices were all worried and threw questions at me by the second, making sure I was with them, that I'd stay with them, so I wouldn't suddenly go under, leaving them behind, but to me it was all just a stream of sounds.
With my upturned face, I opened my eyelids and stared up at the sky that reflected my own crystal blue eyes.