Chapter 1
It’s grim for any girl who loses her way.
Grimmer still for a girl who loses herself.
Know that it’s dangerous to stray from the path.
But it’s far more dangerous not to. - Jennifer Donnelly
When something traumatic happens it’s easy for you to feel like your life is on autopilot. Wake up. Shower. Eat. Go to school. Talk to people. Smile like you’re not in pain. Laugh like you’re not dying. Ignore the pity in their eyes. Forget the sadness tainting your words. Go home. Do homework. Speak to mom. Pretend like we didn’t lose half our family. Shower. Sleep. Repeat. It’s getting harder these days to pretend like nothings wrong. No one would judge me if I stopped, I’m the girl who lost her sister after all.
When we were little Brie and I was inseparable. We used to do everything together, we had matching pajamas and would sleep in the same bed even though mine was across the room not even ten feet away. It wasn’t until junior year that everything changed. Brie started being more secretive, her door never stayed open anymore and we didn’t talk or have sleep-overs like we used to. Mom said it was hormones. Said it was a phase she was going through and to not pay any attention to it. She was wrong. Dad was already partially checked out, biding his time until someone better came along. Now he lives in Paris with his twenty-seven-year-old girlfriend and their golden retriever.
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“Hey, Lani how are you?” I look up to see Skai and Storm standing in front of me. I don’t remember the last time I spoke to them, they used to be my best friends before all this happened. I couldn’t handle the sadness in their eyes anymore. “Hey, I’m okay ya know. Just trying to get through it.” God, I don’t even believe myself. “We should hang out this weekend. Maybe have a sleepover like we used to?” Storm says, she always was the sentimental one. “How about tonight, it’ll be fun Lani. We miss you.” I miss them too of course. It’s been too long since I’ve been able to confide in someone else. “I missed you guys so much,” I say with overwhelming happiness.
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This is a rough draft and also my first try. I would greatly appreciate feedback, let me know if I should keep going or not. Thank you in advance!
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