Doubts
Aurora Elgrave walked into her chambers tired from the battle she and her army had fought. They had succeeded in occupying the villages vital for their plans for the lands to succeed. She hadn’t felt like this in a long while. The feel of fighting and slaughtering the helpless excited her. No. Intoxicated her and gave her the joy of supremacy. She should feel this way, the people she fought for were one of the strongest in the world.
“And soon we will be the rulers of this world. Everyone will bow before us and I will require praise upon pain of death,” said she with a smile. It vanished no sooner than it appeared.
You sure about that?
“Yes. And how are you to stop me?”
It was the voice of him, him that caused her to sway from her mission to begin with. Him that had led her astray. Him that had caused her to doubt. Aurora never bothered with men. Sure there were those that sought her attention, sought the feel of her curvy body and the sweet seducting smell of her skin and hair, but those men were weak and easily manipulated and controlled. She learned this early on in life.
Placing her bloodstained sword next to her vanity, she couldn’t help but to feel something was missing. There was pleasure in that last fight yes, but afterward the emptiness returned. Yes the villagers would now live by their rule and yes Aurora had intended to treat them with as much displeasure as she saw fit.
But you already know it’ll do nothing to feel that void you confused little girl. The village you conquered made you sad. I saw it in your eyes.
There he was, staring at her in the mirror of her vanity. He stood there with his arms crossed and a single foot resting on the wall. He peered at her in that way, with sadness and yet, with love. She had regrettably, looked at him in that way as well, after the two had made love that night.
“If you had known for whom I fought for you wouldn’t have given a second thought in fighting me! When I met you I was tasked with finding out the weaknesses of the city we’re soon to conquer!”
Things went array for you that day didn’t they?
“Because of you!” she sneered. It was a struggle to master herself and keep from shouting. “You wouldn’t stop speaking. You wouldn’t stop taking my hand and dragging me off to another of your silly and childish adventures, even though I commanded you to!”
You’re a good dancer Aurora, but you already know that.
Aurora rose from her seat and turned to face the man standing there. But he had left, just as he did before. Whatever calm she had left was now gone and once again he was to blame.
“Don’t change the subject! The city of Earin will burn and I will delight in seeing it’s people cry out for mercy as we trample them underfoot! Tell me what you think about that!”
The same as I said before Aurora. You’re a confused little girl and I can safely tell you that you’re lying to yourself. Oh yes the children you played with during our adventures would love to see their hero trample them underfoot.
Aurora clenched her fists so tightly she thought her hands would burst. She whirled around to her vanity once more and the man was there, standing in that same way that agitated her.
“Don’t presume to think you know me!”
I’ve a pretty good idea. I’m good at learning about people but you were easy to figure out.
“I am one of the top warriors for the Houndblade Army!” she responded, nearly shouting the words. “And what are you?! Just a vagabond with no place to call home!”
You’ll be the same as me once they find out, rest assured of that.
That part was true. He may have been a vagabond, but her king won’t see it that way. He was in the city she was to spy upon and she had gone on many adventures with the man, danced with the man, slept with the man. He was in the city she was to spy upon and vagabond or no, he would be treated as a citizen of Earin and therefore an enemy. As such, sleeping with an enemy was in her king’s eyes, the same as treason.
“We know who to blame for that don’t we?” she spat. The man didn’t seem phased by the sharp tone she exhibited. “But I’ll redeem myself by bringing your head to my lord!”
I fail to understand why you hate me so much Aurora.
Aurora felt it at that moment, that feeling of immanent victory. All she had to do was push forward, just as she had done in all her previous battles.
“You’re correct for once. I hate you and I hate you with all of my mind, body, and soul!”
Why?
“Why? Because you’re an enemy and I hate my enemies.”
But I’m not an enemy.
“Oh but you are!” she said. She fought the urge to cover small lips that formed her mouth because the tone in which she said those last few words sounded frightened. Mixed-up. Luckily the man didn’t seem to catch upon it.
You enjoyed the time we spent together and you very well know it.
“No! I hated every minute of it! I hated how you dragged me in all the trouble you got into. I hated how you embarrassed me at the city gathering, dancing in the front of the fire as everyone watched! I felt dirty and violated! I hated how you caused me to question myself and everything I fought for! You even made me begin to love you, which I also hated! And most of all, I hate you because….!”
Her throat locked in that moment, as if it were trying to seal her next few words for all eternity. Normally Aurora would have no problem speaking her mind but today, in the presence of this man, she seemed defeated.
Go on and say it Aurora.
Instantly Aurora rose from her vanity, took hold of her sword and flung it at the mirror with a shriek. The mirror shattered into dozens of large and tiny pieces and now Aurora found herself screaming as the gates within her brown eyes opened, releasing the rivers within.
“Because you were gone! I hate you because you were gone Dorien Ell!”
Finding nothing more to say, she slumped to the floor with a hand over her face, allowing the tears to flow from her eyes. Yes, Dorien was gone.
I’m sorry Aurora, but you knew I had to leave.
Aurora turned her gaze to the sound of the door swinging open, clearing the way for a few armed guards to rush into the room.
“My lady is everything well?!” one of them asked. Instantly Aurora rose to her feet and lumbered toward the guards with eyes red from her tears.
“Everything will be will when you exit my room you buffoons! Get out!”
“But my lady we heard-”
“I don’t care! Until I command it, you are not to enter my room again! Do so and I shall have you killed! KILLED!”
Without another word the guards left Aurora. After shutting the door she threw herself atop her bed, her face sinking into the softness of her pillow. The tears returned, but this time the pillow was there to absorb them within its fabric.
There’s nothing stopping you from finding me, save yourself.
“Why would I look for you Dorien? Didn’t you hear what I said?”
I don’t listen to lies. You love me and you very well know it.
“I don’t.”
Then why say what you said and why are you acting like this?
There was no answer. Why was she acting the way she was? It only served to prove Dorein’s point, that she was a scare little girl underneath the façade she shown and such a thing would not do. Slowly the sobbing died down and calmer breathing took its place. The small headache and the locking in her throat began to leave as Aurora thought about her next course of action. She knew she couldn’t sit there crying like a helpless child, it didn’t become her and more importantly, was cowardess in her eyes.
Aurora rose from her bed and cleaned off her face with one of her towels. Then she prepared herself for the journey and the consequences of her departure.
I look forward to being with you again Aurora.
“Shut up. You’ll have much to answer when I find you.”
And when you do you can ask me anything.
Aurora left her room and walked purposefully to the stables where her steed lay in wait. Guards stood at the entrance with large spears in hand. As they saw her approach, they moved aside with smiles upon their faces, knowing she was leaving on another task for the king.
“Another task from the king I see?” said one of them. Aurora gave a snicker, knowing that this was no task but rather an abandonment.
“Yes,” lied Aurora. “This particular task won’t take me long.”
“Good luck and we hope you return safe and with spoils.”
She merely nodded and she walked past. Those same guards will be searching for her head once they find out she had abandoned the kingdom to search for someone she loved. And when they found her, she would have to kill them. A shame really, as she had known those guards since childhood. Aurora found her steed, a magnificent black and white mare brimming with regality. Aurora had the horse since its birth and caring for it was one of her favorite pastimes. She approached the horse and caressed the steed on its face and snout before opening the gate and entering the space in which it lay.
“We’re going for another read my horse. Are you ready?”
The horse snorted as if in reply. Aurora mounted the horse and smacked it on its behind. Immediately the horse galloped out of the stables and the pair were on the road. Aurora didn’t know where to begin her search, but the last place she had been with him should be the logical place to start. From there she didn’t know where her search for Dorien would take her, but she knew she would find him. She would find him and he would answer for his departure.
ns 15.158.61.37da2
