“Good Night Samuel.”373Please respect copyright.PENANAndENbJLzkt
I return her words with a whimper as the door to the outside creaks close.
Darkness envelops the square room and my mind begins to race.
I don’t want to sleep.373Please respect copyright.PENANAah7ntrFJ9L
I refuse to close my eyes, instead, I seek escape through my phone.
“The battery won’t last forever.”
I ignore it. 373Please respect copyright.PENANAoWZJZmqPch
I scroll through the endless feed of information. It comforts me.
“78% left….”
I focus on the light instead of the time left. The blue glow burns my eyes but I don’t mind, anything to keep conscious. 373Please respect copyright.PENANAvTvuTqTWID
“65% left….maybe you should look at the time.”
I mistakenly look at the time on my phone, 11:00 pm.373Please respect copyright.PENANAbbjm11HTbY
Ignore it….focus on the light.
Staying up 3 days straight is beginning to take its toll. 373Please respect copyright.PENANA0lpWzCw7Df
It’s hard to focus on the words on the screen, they meld together into an illegible mess.
“Why did they leave you?”
I catch….bright orbs in the corner of my eye. Where those-
Ignore it.
I refocus my attention on the scribbles on the screen. What’s one more night awake, anything to stay sane.
Noise, as if something is securing around in the darkness. 373Please respect copyright.PENANAwUP4OtKNMj
Ignore it.
The sounds get louder and faster, why hasn’t mom opened the door yet?
Ignore it.
I can hardly focus on the light anymore. My mind races as to what appeared in my dream that night. What if-
IGNORE IT!
Silence. Deafening quiet.
The scratching stopped as if it never started. They said nothing is there, I….must believe them. If not them, then what can I believe?373Please respect copyright.PENANADTFCzI5Ov4
“What’s real?”
Nothing beyond the screen exists, I make real this lie to keep sanity.
“0%”
….Darkness….complete isolation. Cut off from the light before my time, before I was ready.
I place the lifeless device on my chest and stare up into the black void.
“Too poor for a personal charger or night light? Why be born in this kind of life?”
Because I was given no choice.
….I should ignore it.
Sleep’s sweet voice calls to me. I struggle to resist its touch, but it’s not the only thing touching me.
Ignore it.
What time is it, when will the night end? When will the sun grace me with her presence? 373Please respect copyright.PENANA8cRHNskiXz
“Midnight.”
I don’t know if I can make it 8 more hours in this life? Why was I born into this existence?
Every day is the same meaningless thing, the same old pain.
….I’m so tired.
“Then sleep.”
Sleep is good for me….right?
That’s what they say to us all but….is it good for me?
What happens to me when I go to sleep? Am I still….me?
Who will wake up in this bed tomorrow? Will I….even wake up?
“Does it matter?”
….No, I guess it doesn’t matter now, it never did.
Real or not, it doesn’t change the fact-
I’m tired and I don’t want to be here anymore.
My eyes flutter one last time before a deeper darkness overtakes me. 373Please respect copyright.PENANAtZOf9jXyq5
“Goodnight Samuel, sweet dreams.”
I couldn’t ignore it.
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