After Jarred made sure I was okay enough to be left alone I made my way back to my room.
"You haven't told her what happened when you brought her up here?"
I heard Alexander's voice come from the door and I opened it walking in looking at Alexander pacing in front of the bed as Rickey sat on the loveseat with his face in his hands.
"Why what happened?" I asked shutting the door.
They were both quiet for a moment and Rickey uncovered his face glaring at Alexander.
"Can you at least come sit with me please?" Rickey looked at me with those same sad eyes from earlier.
I nodded sitting beside him and he took my hand in his and looked at me.
"I know you told me to stay hidden- I was, even though you know it's against my nature, but then something felt wrong- I could feel your anger and your sadness like a sudden tidal wave, then it suddenly all stopped. . ." he sucked in a breath.
I gently squeezed his hand trying to comfort him. I could feel the same thing he was explaining- except now it was his sheer anxiety.
"Then I smelled the smoke, and I fucking ran- I didn't know if it was something with Jason or you truth be told I didn't care either way I just had to help, then I saw you, Alexander handed you over I took you upstairs and I suddenly had a horrible pain in my chest and I couldn't breathe and I just dropped."
"After we put out- well Kaiden put out the fire, we went to look for Jason; however instead we found Zadicus first out cold. . . Lukas quickly took him down well you know that. I found Jason, went to bring him up to the room too and I found Rickey writhing in pain" Alexander cut in as he stopped pacing finally.
"You and I both were, I guess the blood blond did make me take some of your pain and damage- I was able to push through it quicker for whatever reason, it was over in just a couple days and I just watched you after that." Rickey continued.
"I thought about that night when I saw you die, and I- I kept waiting for Jason to do the same. . . he started to decay and I screamed at them to bring me a case or something and then to leave us all alone" he sighed.
"Then he turned into what you saw downstairs. . . I had to have him removed."
He swallowed and he locked eyes with me.
Can you please ask Alexander to leave?
I heard his voice whisper in my head.
"Alexander. . . do you mind leaving us for a bit please?"
"Of course not, I'm sure you need to relax and everything- you know where I'll be."
He quickly moved out the door and Rickey dropped his head.
"I kept trying to wake both of you. . . even through all the fucking pain I crawled back and forth when I had to, he was still and you- you whimpered, you said our names, you yelled a few times. . . I was so fucking scared"
I felt my chest drop. I had no idea he had to feel everything. . . let alone watched us both like that.
"I could brush off the pain I was getting from you, because god it hurt so much worse to see you like that" he looked back up at me with tears in his eyes.
I looked into his watery ocean orbs and frowned.
"There's. . . there's something I feel like I can tell you now" his voice was shaky now and I could see him grind his teeth.
"Jason and I. . . we had a talk one night- he told me he wouldn't be here one day, he tried to explain to me I couldn't fuck around if that happened- just a bunch of crazy things that I just brushed off because I don't know I didn't believe him?" he shook his head grinning.
"So what did I stupidly do? I fucked around, not literally minus that one time anyway. . . I broke your heart on top of it all even though I wanted nothing more than to love you and have you beside me every day."
"Rickey. . ."
"I lied, I'm sorry for that and fuck I know I have said that a lot, but Luna I thought he was fucking crazy, but I was so stressed out by what he said my head was elsewhere"
As he went on I saw the pain and regret in his eyes. I could feel how heavy this had weighed on his chest because every now and then he'd wince as if there were a bad taste in his mouth.
"He didn't ask me to do a blood promise not to tell you we spoke. . . he just normally asked me. Maybe I was scared it was some stupid test I don't know, but now that he's gone. . ."
He ran his hand through his hair shaking his head.
"I just don't know. . ." he whispered.
I put my hands on his face and leaned in close closing my eyes feeling his breath against my lips before he suddenly crashed his lips into mine. This kiss was slow. . . somewhat sad as if he were savoring the moment as if he wasn't sure it'd stay. . . when we finally broke apart he put his arms around me and looked into my eyes.
"I love you Luna. . ."
"I love you too Rickey"
He shook his head.
"I'm sorry- I haven't even asked how you're feeling. . ."
I looked around the room.
It felt strange. . .Would this now be just my room? Would it be Rickey and I's? . . .
"I don't know. . . I'm glad your okay, I'm glad Zadicus is locked away and close to death as he can be I suppose. . ."
"But you miss him"
Rickey said quietly.
I tried to give a small smile.
"You know he used to remind me every anniversary how lucky he was to have another year- let alone so many extras because he never knew when he'd be gone, but I never actually thought. . ."
"I can't begin to imagine what any of it is like for you. . . I'll help in any way I can for you though" he looked at me giving me a small smile.
We kept trying to smile, but I could tell from the feeling of both of our pain it was hard. I moved closer to him and cuddled up to him. He wrapped his arms around me in response and rubbed my back softly.
"I'm so lost. . . I don't even know where to start and I want to go back to things I just. . . I don't know"
"I know. . . when I managed enough strength I went down there and tried beating the shit out of him to wake him, feel better I'm not really sure"
I pulled my head back to look at him.
"You went down there?"
"Luna you should know that fucker doesn't intimidate me, I don't care if he can kill me or not, what he did was wrong and I needed to know what was wrong with you both"
I sighed and put my head back down.
"I guess I hadn't thought about that. . . I'm sorry, we'll get the answers we need soon enough hopefully. . . until then, can we. . . can we go to your room and sleep?"
He kissed the top of your head.
"As long as I get to be by your side that sounds good to me. . ."
He picked me up and carried me to the room laying me down gently on the bed.
I looked down for the first time at my clothes and noticed they had been changed. I was too focused on other things earlier to notice.
"I changed them for you. . . do you want your pajamas or anything?" he must have saw me as he was looking through the dresser for his own things.
I shook my head and started taking off my clothes and tossed them on the floor and crawled under the covers. I could still smell the faint scent of Jason's cologne just enough to rub my face against the pillow as I curled up. I felt Rickey get in bed beside me and put his arms around me. I suddenly felt the familiar burn of tears build up in my eyes again and gripped at the pillow.
"I know, Love. . ." he whispered in my ear as he rubbed my arm softly.
I pulled his arm tighter against me as I sniffled and he kissed the back of my neck. This time was different than his normal times. . . this was in more of a comforting way, for once I think we both weren't in the mind set for any type of sex right now. Though we definitely wanted to be as close as possible to each other.
"I agree. . . I don't want anything more than just to be with you like this right now- other than bashing that fucker's face in anyway. . ."
I smiled a little.
"I'm sorry. . . I forgot you could probably hear my thoughts right now" I said quietly.
"No it's okay. . . believe me it shocks me in a way too" he let out a chuckle.
He nuzzled my shoulder and took a deep breath and I felt him relax beside me.
I closed my eyes with a small smile and let myself drift.
☾☾☾
"I don't disagree with you, but with the four of you gone. . . at such a time at that let alone with Zadicus being unable to respond to things in Italy. . . we have to figure out what to do with him."
I heard Alexander's voice out in the hallway as I started to wake up.
"I understand, I do- he's not even awake, but I guess we can talk to her and figure out a plan. . ."
I pushed off the covers and walked over to the dresser and put on some pants and a shirt quickly as I kept listening in.
"She's awake so that's perfect timing"
Alexander quipped.
There was a knock on the door suddenly.
"You dressed?" Rickey asked.
"Yes, you can come in" I walked over to the chair in the corner and say down.
The door opened and Alexander and Rickey walked in.
"How much did you hear?"
"I think the most important part- we need to figure out what to do about things. . . and I couldn't agree more even though I may not be. . . ready."
I admitted sighing.
"We have two options I figure. . . we can not tell everyone eventually we can, but then others can start to believe you too are able to die, but we know for a fact that isn't the case. . ."
"Maybe that's the one way they can be killed though-"
Alexander snorted.
"No, she had a very similar injury she's never been shy to hide from getting injured"
I winced now realize how right Alexander was.
"Oh. . . anyway what's option two?" Rickey tried to change the subject back.
"Options two is we tell everyone, and we say the truth. Zadicus killed him, we have no idea where he is and we need to find him- now the reason for that small lie is because it will flush out both the people who may have been still following him or people who are sided with us"
Alexander had thought about this. . . It wasn't a bad plan either- either way would work, but one potentially was more dangerous than the other.
I rubbed my forehead sighing.
"What is Jarred doing right now. . ."
"Nothing why?" Alexander quickly responded.
"Who holds power right now?"
I looked at him.
"You do of course, Jarred mainly. . . Rickey has some of course, but until things are official Jarred and you hold most."
"What do you mean by officially? I thought the brand was it?" Rickey asked confused shaking his head stepping forward.
I looked at them both confused. I had completely forgotten that the brand would be given under such circumstances. . . almost like in times in war it would show who they were bound to and who's orders they fell under.
"I gave it to Jarred and Rickey pretty much immediately, I had to wait for Rickey to wake up a bit though"
Rickey rolled up his black sleeve and held out his arm revealing the crescent moon with droplets that was now burned into his skin.
"I'll admit I was surprised it didn't heal, then he had explained something about your blood being infused in the branding device?"
I nodded.
"It's weird to explain. . . anyway so, what's the situation with Eric and Cassie? What do they know?"
"They know that there was an attack, the three of you had to deal with the aftermath."
I nodded.
"Short and sweet. Good."
"How's Jarred doing?" Rickey asked looking at Alexander now.
"He's running things smoothly as we thought, you haven't talked to him really still?" Alexander raised his brow.
Rickey shook his head.
"We texted a couple of times. . . in person however, no"
I looked at Rickey now and he seemed unsure how to feel, and when I tried to use our bond to see if that was true it showed the same. . . His emotions were still a little over the place, but with a thick feeling of numbness.
"He's out of his meetings for the day you know." Alexander responded.
"We should talk to him Rickey. . ." I spoke up.
He nodded.
"Alexander what's the security detail?" Rickey turned his head back to Alexander.
Alexander rubbed his chin for a moment thinking.
"We should appear to make things normal if you intend on going out- we of course no there's no danger now. . . it might look odd however if we don't keep up the normality of it- why?"
"Because we need to talk about the funeral. . . and we're going to need a lot of liquor."
I felt a lump in my throat suddenly and a heavy weight in my chest again as Rickey spoke the word I didn't want to hear most. He was right though. . . We had to bury Jason, he already had been left above ground for two weeks. . .
"I can have that all done here you know that right?" Alexander questioned.
Rickey shook his head.
"Jason wouldn't want us to hide away and be miserable. . . so we're going out" Rickey straightened his shoulders crossing his arms.
Alexander nodded.
"Very well then, I'll let everyone know and get Jarred- how much time do you two need?"
Rickey looked at me.
"A half hour should be fine, I'll take a quick shower and everything then we'll be down"
"I'll come get you both when it's time."
Alexander bowed his head before walking out and Rickey walked over to the other chair as I got up heading towards the bathroom.
"You aren't coming?" I gave him a confused face.
"I didn't know if you'd want company. . ." he looked sheepishly.
God it was so odd seeing him this way. . . It was okay and understandable but it would definitely take some adjustment compared to his normal cocky self.
I reached my hand out to him and walked backwards towards the door. He smiled getting up and walked to me grabbing my hand as I led him into the bathroom.
"You don't have to stay away from me like I'm some china doll you know. . ." I said as I grabbed some towels after turning on the shower.
I realized maybe that sounded a little harsh. Though I wasn't wrong maybe there was a better way to say it. . . after all he was going through his own mourning too and who knows what else.
I finished taking off my clothes and I looked at him as he tossed his shirt in the hamper with a sigh.
"I know, I'm sorry. . ."
I stepped inside the shower remembering I was on a time frame and stood there for a minute feeling the steam and hot water and I closed my eyes feeling the beads of water roll down my body.
"I just- I know he wouldn't want us to stop living or enjoying each other but I don't want to just jump into things like he never existed either" Rickey said as he entered the shower behind me.
I started shampooing my hair and kept looking at the wall in front of me.
"I know. . ." I started to say as I turned around to look at him as he was washing his face with the other showerhead.
"But, if I were to be selfishly honest, I'd love nothing more than the normal you back"
He put the showerhead back and put his hands on my waist looking down at me smiling.
"If I were to be also selfishly honest, I am sad. . . and uncertain of all of what these changes mean, I'm alright- I mean I wouldn't feel comfortable in your room, at least for now maybe. . . but otherwise I'm fine I promise."
He leaned down placing a kiss on my lips. I kissed him back looping my arms around his neck trying to deepen the kiss but a quick squeeze of my ass made me jump making me pull away.
"Throne first, like you always said- as much as I love being your distraction we have to put that aside for the moment"
He grinned looking down at me before kissing my nose. I huffed turning around and went back to washing my hair.
"Sooo, since I shared what a few of mine meant- when are you going to tell me what your back piece means?" I felt his finger trace the outline of my tattoo making me shiver.
"Well, I am death in some ways, and I liked the story" I shrugged running my hands through my hair and I turned around as I lathered the soap on my body and trailed a finger down my sternum to my torso tracing the small details of my other tattoo.
"This one, was well a little bit of a combo of things. . . I love my lingerie as you know, and I love most things spooky- and I've always like gypsy things so I came up with this little concept"
I watched at the soap rinsed off my body as I finished tracing down the tattoo around my hips.
"I can't lie that one is my favorite" he bit his lip looking me up and down again and nudged me towards the door.
"Now get out before my dick decides other plans"
I laughed opening the glass door and stepping out onto the towel and grabbed another for around my waist. And I smiled, for the first time since everything. I truly laughed. . . Even if it was over some silly perverted comment it was a real laugh. I walked over to the sink and grabbed my hairdryer and started blow drying my hair while Rickey finished his shower as I made small peeks at his perfect sculpted body as the water ran down it.
"What do you think Jarred is going to say?" Rickey asked as he stepped out of the shower.
I turned the hairdryer off putting it away and turned around.
"Well. . . I don't know to be honest, I saw him when I got my letter. . ."
"What'd he say?" he rubbed the towel in his hair before wrapping it around his waist.
"He didn't hate me. . . the rest was just what he's been doing kind of. . ."
He opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it for a moment.
"Right. . . I forgot this isn't the first time he's dealt with this" he said quietly and I shook my head.
I started putting on some quick makeup.
"If I were to be honest, I couldn't blame him- he has every right"
He came up beside me and looked at me in the mirror.
"You can't keep beating yourself up Love. . ."
I tried distracting myself with my makeup as I put it on.
"I know."
But for me it had only been a day of knowing. . . maybe he was at a different part of it all. He was being sincere and caring about it. I could see and feel it after all.
He leaned to me pressing a kiss on my shoulder.
"I'm going to go get dressed" he said before he walked out into the bedroom.
I rolled my shoulder trying to shake off the saddening emotions I was feeling again and put on my liquid lipstick finishing my makeup.
"Inspirate ed espirate e tutto andrà bene." I whispered looking at myself in the mirror before slipping into the bedroom.
(Breathe in and out and everything will be fine)
I looked at Rickey who was now in a black fitted tshirt and a pair of black jeans leaning against the dresser on his phone. I walked over and nudged him with my hip.
"Mi scusi" I muttered.
(Excuse me)
He looked at me confused and move away from the dresser.
"I'm assuming that means excuse me?"
I giggled and nodded.
"Indeed it does, I just want to borrow something so I can get to the room and get my clothes"
I rummaged around for some quick pants and shirt.
"Want me to go with you or?"
I shook my head as I put on my clothes and headed for the door.
"No need"
I walked out and walked down to my room and opened the door and instantly felt a shiver up my spine. The light was still on, The sun was shining through the big windows, but it felt off. I shook my head walking into the room and headed straight for the walk in closet and started looking for a simple dress. I found a thin sweater dress with sleeves with buttons down the front and took it off the hanger and found a pair of black loubouton heels.
"This'll do" I said to myself as I started quickly throwing everything on and looked at the clock.
Right on time.
I shuffled my way out of the closet and back to Rickey's room noticing the door was open. When I walked in I noticed Alexander standing in the middle of the room on his phone typing away.
"Perfect now that you're here we can head down"
Alexander said as he gave a small smile looking up from his phone.
Rickey turned around to look at me.
"God you're gorgeous" he said with a smile.
I gave him a smile and walked over to him.
"Aren't you just a flirt"
He rolled his eyes with a grin.
"Alright, lets hurry up and get downstairs" Alexander moved us out the door.
He led us downstairs into the study and opened the door and Jarred and Joshua were already inside at the small round table. I swallowed as I suddenly remembered memories from the night before Jason's death and I froze at the door for a moment.
"Luna you alright?" Jarred broke my out of my thoughts.
"Ti serve un minuto?" he pushed again for an answer.
(Do you need a minute?)
I shook my head.
"I'm fine."
I walked into the room and Rickey followed and I sat in the chair beside Jarred.
"So where do we need to start? Or want. . . to start?" Jarred asked looking around the table.
Joshua cleared his throat.
"I think we need to talk about our next steps of coming out about the events that occurred. . ."
"What are our options?" Jarred looked over to Alexander.
I mean I knew there was a reason we put Jarred in this position in such scenarios, but wow was he filling in his role well. . . I'm not sure what I expected, but in some ways I felt like I wasn't an equal. . .
"We have two options I figure. . . we can not tell everyone eventually we can, but then others can start to believe she is able to die too, but we know for a fact that isn't the case. . ."
"Options two is we tell everyone, and we say the truth. Zadicus killed him, we have no idea where he is and we need to find him- now the reason for that small lie is because it will flush out both the people who may have been still following him or people who are sided with us"
Jarred tapped his finger on the table and sighed.
"Well. . . we can go about this in a vote or we can just have Luna or I choose" Jarred finally spoke.
"Uh, not to be a dick but I'm right here too" Rickey reminded.
Jarred pulled out a envelope from his pocket that had his name on it with Jason's handwriting and tossed it on the table.
"This is different"
"You got one too?" Rickey looked at Jarred now.
"We all did. . . anyway his request was for me to handle his funeral. . . so this is included, so with all respect this is between her and I- I will take your request in mind though however because I do not know how current our letters are. . ."
I looked at Alexander.
"Do you know how recent these are? Or at least his?"
He shook his head.
"I knew nothing about them. . . I will be honest, they were laid out on his desk that day. . ."
"We all vote."
I said looking around the table now and stopped and looked directly at Jarred.
He nodded.
"All for option one?" He spoke.
"I have a question first. . ." Rickey asked.
"Go on" Alexander urged.
"Is it a risk for Luna either way about her ability to die?"
He had a small point, but given that enough people knew about my battle wounds as Alexander called them it was possible enough wouldn't believe such things. Though. . . this could be a way for the sides to drift and shift because Zadicus always said Jason and I weren't the same. . .
"Enough people know of her wounds she's sustained through the past, it is a risk, but not one I'm too worried over- if I were to be honest there's more of a risk in lost faith with both choices, but there's no way for us to explain his disappearance. . ."
"Lost faith in what exactly?" Rickey raised his brow at Alexander.
So I wasn't the only one who had these thoughts. . .
"Zadicus has been threatening them for ages, well- Jason rather, which implied that he was either different from her or they both were different then him. . . however later history would prove her and him to be more of the same- Jason never proved such things and now he is dead. . ."
"So we have cults to worry about basically?" Rickey huffed a laugh.
"It's worse than that. . ." Jarred admitted.
"They'll kill those for their cause so they're the worst kind. . . it'll be a fight to 'find' him"
I cut in.
"There's no way out in short." Joshua admitted.
"So again, I ask all for option one raise your hand" Jarred spoke.
We waited a moment and no one raised their hand.
"I assume all for option two then?" He asked.
We all nodded in agreeance.
"Alright. . . then Alexander, Joshua if you could please leave we have more private matters to discuss. . ." Jarred looked at them both before grabbing his glass and taking a sip.
They bowed their heads and made their way out.
"Everything alright?" Rickey asked.
"As good as they can be all things considered. . . I'm not fragile trust me death is something I'm okay with" Jarred shook his head putting his glass down.
"I should really be asking you two that, considering you were withering on the floor fucking dying"
I winced at the thought.
"I'm recovered, she's. . . better now I think" Rickey looked at me.
"Physically I'm healed, emotionally. . . if I were to be honest I'm still unsure" I admitted looking down at the table.
"You know. . . we've been prepared for this moment for over five hundred years it does at times feel unreal" Jarred shook his head adjusting in his seat.
"So. . .those letters, he never really was joking was he?" Rickey hesitated his question.
I could sense he was uneasy but it was a little hard to tell as to what, I could take a peek but that was rude.
"No. . . regrettably not, what did yours say if I may ask?" Jarred looked at him interested.
Part of me was curious as to what everyone's said. . . How detailed was everyone else's? I knew my last part was more recent. . . I could see the difference in the ink, but I didn't want to share that. It was a sacred letter as far as I was concerned.
Rickey swallowed.
"He uh, he didn't actually leave me one really. . . just basics about Luna, he spoke with me not too long before though. . ."
He paused as if he were unsure if he should share the information or not.
"What did he say to you?" Jarred asked and you could tell he was holding back some anger.
Rickey cleared his throat.
"The truth is, the burden I bare. . . is just as bad if not in more ways selfish then her's. . . she would tell me all about her nightmares, and it wasn't a surprise that he would be upset and have such a vendetta against me, but instead of telling her no, or me turning away and ignoring her that day. I was selfish enough to have her take me, and so I have given her this life, given her this time, these memories and pain and yes some joy too, but when I do die. I simply cannot bare the thought of what will happen to her when I am gone."
There was a tight squeeze in my chest and I could tell the pain wasn't from myself. . . it was from the guilt Rickey must be feeling right now. I placed my hand on his under the table and rubbed the back of his hand softly. Jarred remained there with no response. The room fell quiet for a moment.
"When was this. . ." Jarred asked softly staring at the table now.
"The night I asked for his blessing. . ."
"Of course he'd say some messed up merda like that" Jarred huffed shaking his head.
"I think it's time we go out- how's that sound to you guys?" Jarred changed the subject.
I told you he'd want to bail.
Rickey's voice chuckled in my head.
I shrugged looking to Rickey.
"Sounds good to me, where we going?"
Jarred grinned as he got up.
"Casa."
(Home)
I looked at him puzzled.
"Casa Dolce Inferno" Rickey finished Jarred's answer.
(Home Sweet Hell)
"That's an interesting name. . ." I started getting up feeling more confused.
We walked to the door and opened them and Joshua and Alexander were outside waiting.
"We're going out, do whatever needs done with security- I'll drive" Jarred said to them both and headed towards the living room.
Alexander and Joshua started discussing a plan as they walked behind us I grabbed a leather jacket off the coat rack and tossed Rickey's too him as I slipped mine on.
ns 15.158.61.10da2
