I found myself taking off out the front door again. Why is it always just a random little burst of "Get away"? I can't even determine a little bit of some sort of schedule to when it happens. How do I know how to contain myself? What if I up and left, got lost, and didn't know how to get back? I've done it more than once.
Why's it so easy to get lost, even in your head? Getting lost in your own thoughts is just an everyday thing, right? I'm not completely insane? But how come everyone does it, but you still can get in trouble for it? How come you can't just say: "Sorry, my thoughts were distracting me," and get away with it? Because people use it as an excuse anyways, even if they really aren't. It's unfair to those of us who really do get lost here and there.
Now, I may be an average person, but that doesn't mean that everything I do is average. I'm constantly preoccupied, aren't I? Everyday things distract us from what's currently up ahead in school, work, and even at home. So why do we get in trouble when we lose our train of thought? I could even be focused on the loss of a loved one, and still be yelled at, only making me feel worse.
So what's the whole reason our minds trail away? Why is it uncontrollable? Why is overthinking a part of it, tying in with depression, anxiety, and stress. It even leads to it. So, here I am. Writing this. In the middle of the day.
So I replay the 'what ifs' or the regrets I hold, or spend a lot of time worrying about the future. I'm always told to live in the moment, so why don't I? I give even the smallest things too much time and attention. Overthinking is apparently a toxic thing, I guess. It's a weakness. It's a sign of trauma. 225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAtYQ5NpU9h
What did I even start this with-? Exactly. I live on the small regrets.
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