視角【男主】#小段子231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaOnr5NbFiR
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最近那些人看我的眼神不太一樣，是一種怪罪的眼神，我不知道是他們變了，還是我變了。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Zbi9zRDZl
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一開始看淡，最後的重視已經無法挽救一切。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrXTfXXTAYU
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最近諸事不順，還以為水逆了呢，直到現在我遇見了眼前身穿白袍，扎著長馬尾的錢斯彤，她是我的國小同學、青梅竹馬跟摯友，不過對我來說現在她是一名心理醫師。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYNY2VYKWmL
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231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqov4skBYY6
錢斯彤放下筆，直勾勾的盯著我。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOL42Cd0bJK
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwgGbPdCBm
「最近有什麼事嗎？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmjVb4EaSO
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZpheBKqSWB
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsP44MvSPj5
「呃…沒有…應該沒有。」正在發呆的我錯愕得回覆了這個問題。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEEghpXUC33
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKrhDuE30r
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUW4HxhgO4
「你為什麼來做心理諮商呢？」錢斯彤再次拿起筆，不過她沒有寫字，而是用筆頭輕敲桌面。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVj2nU7mUwg
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcAKpHbqa2P
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoG2yceJsS
「被逼的。」我從來都不會把實情說出口。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxUbOfysWl5
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQMyRm6wtj
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUSfW6pkFzI
「那你有沒有不舒服或者想跟我聊點什麼？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPIkSpH9R0c
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbpGNdT2YTA
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「………」我沒有回答，卻看見錢斯彤左手拿著一本像是課本的東西。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0mXkvbuwW
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ00fQ1zV81Q
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpBtsfFQXHZ
「你還記得嗎…這個。」錢斯彤放下筆，把國小畢業紀念冊翻到我們班一起合照的那頁。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SB66v6Zkr
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQRMpH6ey0
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnB1az3Pr3Q
「我記得啊，國小畢業的時候。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOjwM8eFIu9
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfx1FDFemmK
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72Q08zOkjV
「那你記得這個嗎？」錢斯彤把一兩疊報紙全攤在桌上，斗大的新聞標題寫著《驚傳維冠金龍大樓倒塌事件死亡人數持續攀升》231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJf56AbSKqv
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231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyoEkUBy9U
「記得啊，我姐死在裡面。」我的口氣很平穩，似乎對於這幾年前的事已經釋懷。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBoVhtXxkA
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「這個呢？」錢斯彤掏出一個皮夾遞到我面前。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgpyYKk7keZ
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「好像在哪裡看過…」我翻着錢包，因為老舊，外面的皮革層層剝落，在翻的同時也掉出一些碎屑。錢包裡已經沒有錢，可是還有一些發票、折價卷、一堆各式各樣的會員卡、一張身份證。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7L2wtAMII
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民國43年6月14日。那是我爸的生日，那是我爸的身份證，那個就是我爸的錢包。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkZfPrwcyy
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj0Kuyx2qK9
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「回想起來還是有點自責呢，明明是長子，卻無法從盜匪手中把自己的老爸救出來，讓他就這樣被砍死。」我突然的一段話讓錢斯彤有點錯愕。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqktrBIHwk0
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDF1obbQxv0
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「我以為你爸爸…」她驚訝的摀嘴，隨後低頭道歉。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKS01atNLDG
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「死了就死了，不用道歉。」其實是我經不起道歉，我早已習慣把道歉這種負面動詞的主詞通通改成我自己。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGNGjUCIm6
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231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vnZ49XAW0
「我記得你以前都是班上的第一名，成績很好，尤其是數學。」錢斯彤對著我微笑。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qC5sgcdoP
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsZaP8oL9ug
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「那個能有什麼用，我身邊可以走的都走了。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6hBpZil90h
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPgwbJpKWCi
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「你有什麼興趣嗎？或讓自己開心的東西？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvXd5FpDBXX
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「我沒對任何事物提起勁過。」我苦澀得對著錢斯彤笑了笑。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5grSRJvqo7
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZaFJS8O7Z
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTt9T2oSjOn
「為什麼不嘗試看看呢？這麼沒動力呀？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrY9RlOE8x
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmSMl06VeG
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「我不想，以前想的時候通通被拒絕了。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRLdnt6lLXl
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「誰拒絕你？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQs4h2ptwdp
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231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9mC76CsQ6
「我媽跟我爸，照理來說我應該要不爽的，可是我沒有，反正他們也死了。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SYTr31xFc
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkwhLl82swl
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExMmDX6aPY
「冒昧問一下，你還有家人嗎？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4OSR9FLwF
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「沒有。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDN2bOPXGB
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一陣沉默，詭異的靜。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4VhojQCFzG
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdkOTaUFSs
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「那…我可以當你的朋友嗎？我想多陪陪你。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9IIwkMofh
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUJOfoIxa3
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「妳不會不方便嗎？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqHn1ut3fx
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNlRer2bYW0
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2Yl2XzVcv
「不會，只要能夠幫你。」錢斯彤投射一道期待的眼神到我臉上。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL7ih2nc7rt
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwfkFFq2BBJ
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「好吧…你要來我家？」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkBnRFxrn2w
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_____________________________________231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtaew96DdaK
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今年是第二年，錢斯彤跟我同居順便拯救我的第二年。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cMghSL31q
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DYE04fYN0
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「你的病情好轉很多了！」錢斯彤開心的看著我自己親手做的木椅。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqgxtbIbpb
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我培養了幾個興趣。能夠幫我分散注意力的興趣。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8SrvIIVSJ
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「開心嗎？那個送你，我現在有新作品了。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8PXRa69C5E
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「你真的進步很多。」錢斯彤眼眶泛紅，溼潤的瞳孔在鎂光燈照射下閃爍。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwzv11pmJVo
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「我也很謝謝你。是你拉我一把的。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GwrmfQccH
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvC3mKudV0
我也哭了，想到這幾年來錢斯彤把我當作小孩照顧，絲毫不見一點煩躁的神情，才能造就出這樣的我-有興趣的我。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGZueZtC0Q
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJig1lzpB1
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「雖然很不捨，可是我還是得恢復我的崗位。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3daUXd4UOL
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMPwbSmrFy
錢斯彤兩年前向上司提出我的病例報告，才得以有兩年的時間慢慢陪我。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpAXatBX74
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「好，你回去吧，多多保重，也要和我保持聯絡。」
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231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpoVk5hyR5k
「謝謝你，其實蠻有成就感的。」錢斯彤笑了笑，走到鞋櫃前挑選自己的短靴。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFg3Q7IeXb
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kbAtdHQ9J
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「我送你去吧。」我也拿了一雙鞋。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2WwEde9LpC
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「謝謝。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxcN0xywws
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodVgXd7O9M
我們走下樓，我的車停的位子離公寓有一段距離，需要小走一下。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx4DxqoClsg
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又是紅燈。小紅人樹立在LED裡，示意我們不要走過去。當我內心又想抱怨時，想起錢斯彤跟我說過「你可以拿抱怨或生氣的時間，多多想你喜歡的東西，不然可就浪費了。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7rgAZO2ewf
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突然一輛計程車從對向車道直衝而來，眼看就要撞上錢斯彤，我一把推開她。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJqgCgEsi7
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須臾之間，我看見她的表情。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VDdM8QtDP
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(那是什麼？)我做了一個掛號在內心問自己。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnj4j9PP9e
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之後我就睡著了，什麼都不記得。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtW4RreTv0P
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＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKiuKH479Qd
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一群人在滿是鮮花中間放著一張男子照片的地方，有的泣不成聲，有的雖然沒有哭，仍漏出悲傷的神情，錢斯彤也在。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJmeCx7aZ7
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEG4KY9wEQ7
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「為什麼要救我……」錢斯彤努力拭著一連串下來的淚。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YIwLso8N5
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啊，原來那是我的喪禮。原來我死了。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzIvgAHlb3
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbw6YJWRmxz
看著錢斯彤，有些欣慰，幸好自己擋下來了，幸好死的人是我。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBtBxKsc4S
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雖然知道妳聽不見。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4J9UmRtZh
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「謝謝妳！我終於報答妳了！」我大喊著，沒有一個人理我。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7NXxjKU2W
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我覺得全身輕快舒爽。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5BIGHOdE0
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至少我不像那些「家人」，我死時沒有虧欠誰。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSyW64EvU4
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很圓滿，很不錯。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcoNdyBLBO
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我躺到裡面，又睡著了。
