The bus slows and come to a stop at a station next to a convenience store.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsc9bSKfvtn
The driver stands and announces in a loud voice, “Philadelphia. We have forty minutes.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡetMyKZnODQ
The two women watch the others stand and stretch as they gather their purses and wallets before disembarking. As the others near the front Mechteld says, “Everyone will get off to have lunch.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSAtxhKbr3
“Will we?” Marquita asks.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQh7pL8zJp
“We won’t be eating.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGWNZ3njT6
Mechteld reaches into the pocket of her hoodie and takes out a pack of cigarettes and lighter.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU67rYmjHH3
“Come on, I need a cigarette.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMe4EdjZJ8
Marquita’s legs shake as she stands. The hours of sitting made her already weak legs stiffer. She wavers as she walks down the narrow aisle. When she gets to the top of the steps she firmly grips the rail as she feels Mechteld bracing her small frame by the shoulders. Together the carefully walk down the stairs. The driver waits for them at the bottom. Marquita locks eyes with him as he says, “Feeling better I see.” 634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmcgqEWUjXA
His aura changes to a shade Marquita has always associated with suspicion. With the other passengers away his thoughts come out clear.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8o0RBdjQtF
“These two are weird. How do they even know each other?”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy4upE8iWbK
Marquita pauses to look at the driver and read more from him, but is interrupted by Mechteld pushing her forward towards the curb.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGtZxyf316e
Once out of earshot, Mechteld says, “He’ll switch out at Pittsburgh. He’s thinking about saying something to the next driver about us.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsnWnfDVc4
“Will he?” She asks. The thought is optimistic to her.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0voTF0DHlz
“Maybe, he doesn’t know what to say besides ‘They’re weird’.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9D2S2trL7
Together they sit on a curb, their legs stretched out over hot asphalt. From under her baseball cap, a bead of sweat runs down Mechteld’s forehead before becoming lost in the scars crisscrossing her face. Marquita scratches her head as the stiches start to burn as the sweat collects under the hijab.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡethsWak6zP
Mechteld pulls out her pack of cigarettes and quickly lights up as Marquita desperately fans air under her skirt. She looks at Mechteld’s long sleeves and says, “We stand out with all these clothes on.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieclAkOOAH
“We’ll stand out worse without them.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOnWEe4KhKC
Marquita thinks, “Should I try to stand out? Is being noticed the key to getting home?”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFC8Hwby3M
Marquita looks across the street to the convenience store where the other passengers were buying their lunches. It feels odd to Marquita that she isn’t hungry. She knows she hasn’t eaten in days, yet the absence of hunger pangs is discomforting.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4a4zrRpf5K
Turning to Mechteld she asks, “Do you really never eat?”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRKna3gbsh
“Only on rare occasions. Some immortals keep up the ritual, but it seems redundant to me.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNRsWodUHm
Marquita thinks about an existence without food. For her, it seems to alien and unnatural to live without it. In Corona, life revolved around faith, family and food. She suspects she won’t have any of those things while with Mechteld.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjUJOll8tDx
Marquita thoughts go to the last dinner she had with her parents. After their prayers, their meal suffered from several strained silences. It was the first dinner they had together in months, but despite his chronic absences, her father had made an attempt to be there and make her happy by making her favorite food. The memory stings Marquita’s consciousness as she thinks about it. Even with the silence and confusing feelings, the memory is precious to her.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslNLGMNd2t
Thinking about her last meal Marquita says, “I could never give up my favorite food-”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBPR3kewqSt
“Tostones.” They say at the same time.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5gnHCBNGFs
Mechteld nods, “Yeah, I know.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdaNs4L2n3B
“Surely you have a favorite food?” Marquita asks.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwUpvLrq8lh
Mechteld takes a long drag from her cigarette and lets it out slowly, “You’re looking at it.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Jm35oWGM7
Mechteld rubs the butt of her now spent cigarette on the ground before taking another from the pack. Quickly she lights it and sets her pack and lighter back down.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4IlEqqzTO
Marquita asks, “Did you read from my mind that I loved tostones?“
Mechteld shakes her head as she breathes deep before letting out a cloud of smoke, “No, I learned that from your father.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo2vSVRkrS9
Marquita again wonders about her parents. Had her father gone back to work after only a few days of losing his daughter? Did they tell their family in the DR what happened? Had they planned a funeral? Or were they looking for her?634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmQAMbmGmfR
Marquita thinks back to the picture of her father in the paper. She knows he was hurting. His tired eyes etched in the newsprint showed a level of emotion she hasn’t seen in years. It was a reminder that despite everything, she meant something to him.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs38s0BMEaG
“He always made tostones when he came back from a long trip. He would pretend he was making them for himself, but he’d always make me the most.” She says out loud.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOp8vV8I9n
She thinks again to the awkward silences at dinner and at the hospital and about his casual wave as he walked away from her hospital room. 634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpQsKczydd
“He could never say it.” She says as she keeps remembering his hand waving back at her. “He always had to be so hard.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5opIWk8fs
“It wasn’t his fault.” Mechteld offers. “He expressed himself in the way he knew how.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDdYC95okMR
“I’d trade all the tostones in the world for one real moment with him.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeNIpdXMOk1
Marquita hangs her head and thinks to herself, “Not even in the end could he do that.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVVlkKcZyS
“At least you knew.” Mechteld keeps her eyes on pavement. “He’ll regret actions for the rest of his life.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz4GBOXRMgT
Marquita turns to Mechteld with her eyebrows slightly lifted.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ThqC8CtBp
“Or at least until I see him again.” She adds.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBsscaG1z0
“If.” Mechteld corrects. “We’re only in Pennsylvania. You still have a long way to go.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDPzifhQoZ
The thought enters Marquita’s mind, “Why wait and follow her rules? I can end this now.” But it’s quickly extinguished with memories of heads scars, fire, and her father’s unconcerned wave.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvm7y5fVpKz
“Before he became scared of me he wasn’t afraid to hold my hand. Whenever we’d walk around our neighborhood he’d hold my hand and say, “Stay close, New York is the most dangerous place in the world”, but when we would visit Santo Domingo he’d hold my hand tighter and tell me, “Stay close, Santo Domingo is the most dangerous place in the world”.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7ebG8OVkV
Marquita grins slightly as she remembers, but her hazel eyes hold sadness.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8oRptaYkJq
“I used love Sundays because my dad didn’t work. After church, just the two of us would walk to the bodega hand in hand and he’d buy two chocolate milks: one for me, one for him.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlRRGBtYEWO
“When I started to know things I shouldn’t, he treated me different. His grip on my hand became looser until one day he let go. After that he started to push me away and eventually he got his job so he could run away from me.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRR02wxMx3
“It wasn’t you he was running from. It was himself.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVU6f0N7qV
“Yeah, but when you’re ten it doesn’t make a difference.”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAU8TovhOXX
From the bus the hear the driver shout, “Five minutes!”634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPLTJlhPhi
Marquita looks down at the small pile of cigarettes next to Mechteld. She realizes she has been unaware of how long she has been talking. For her, she finally had a chance to tell someone the feelings she kept to herself and despite the circumstances she feels there is so much more she wants to say.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbSj1LgyzP
Mechteld stands and shakes stray ash from her clothes.634Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmBzqgdLk7
“Come on, let’s go. Use your eyes and ears this time.”
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