The thief startled before raising her eyes without reflection in our direction. My sapiens contorted herself to reach out her hand to our friend below. Zéphyr took advantage of a crowd movement to be pulled onto our platform without being seen by her pursuers even if fighting against the centrifugal force wasn’t an easy task. Once in security, the cyborg finally changed her holographic appearance again to look like a hip-hop singer with a huge cap and black sunglasses.
“What kind of embarrassing situation did you find yourself in with the Triad?” I asked, handing her the last crisp.
The thief ignored me as she caught her breath. Her plastic lungs were about to explode.
“Need help to zero those thugs?” my partner pursued.
“What? No!” continued Zéphyr, refusing the salsa-covered nacho that Ali swallowed without further ado. “I was about to escape anyway…”
“Your girlfriend bet C$50 you wouldn’t,” I snitched.
“She what?” Zéphyr falsely gasped.
In response, my partner just flipped her spice-stained finger at us.
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Back at the Kitty half a Martian hour later, Eazy-E’s clone told us about her misadventure. She had been on Thebe for more than a month, tracking down the old associates of a certain King Xiao; formerly known as the Emperor of the Outer Worlds.
At his peak, Xiao was the greatest godfather of all the Triads beyond the belt, or Tak Khuun. He was described as a giant with prodigious strength and corrupted by all possible vices. Vices that he could afford thanks to his limitless fortune. Nevertheless, Xiao vanished overnight a long time ago. Unverified sources mentioned a deal that went south with the Moon; others believed in a mutiny within Xiao’s own clan. The scoundrel would take advantage of his retirement somewhere in the system, on Byblos Gates or Caliban as many Triads under his control were dismantled.
“I now remember the story of the bracelet on Ceres City. It contained a microfilm that belonged to the Lost Triads, right? What artifact do you want to steal this time?”
“Aren’t you aiming too high?” Ali worried, confirming my thoughts. “I mean… I read this lunatic was a hell of a nutjob! And a Lunar puppet.”
“You can read?” I said before receiving a smack on my head. “Anyway, this guy is surely flatlined by now. Mobsters don’t retire. Especially when they tend to fly too close to the Moon.”
Zéphyr swiped away our comments by waving her hand. “I know from a very trustable source that Xiao is alive and well. And thanks to the last information stolen tonight, I found where he’s hiding! Hence the idea of a robbery that could implicate you.”
“Once again, we’re not bandits,” I retorted. “The Alliance will inevitably discover our mischief if King Xiao ravages the system in search of what we have misappropriated!”
The cyborg had already played that card two months before by accompanying us incognito during a similar work on a hijacked supercargo. But the data traffickers of the Thanatos Cartel couldn’t be compared to the gruesome Lost Triads.
Yet, Ali intervened to side with Zéphyr. “Stealing from outlaws ain’t a crime, Lee.” My partner had been burying herself into her computer screen again since then. “Besides, this Gods’ ass licker won’t ravage the system if he’s pushing daisies.” To conclude her plea, she put in front of me the still pixelated poster of Zi Xinj Xiao with a bounty of C$1,500,000.
Yes. C$1,500,000! The Wheel of Fortune!
I backtracked. Obviously, this was a risky idea. Could we trust the Data Maiden on this? But after all, how long has Xiao been retired? He would have been about ninety. Who wouldn’t kill a hundred-year-old grandpa for that much?
“And where is our Alzheimer’s Emperor?” I asked.
“Europa,” Zéphyr replied after finally switching back to her true appearance. “In a bunker at the bottom of an ocean coated with an ice dome that is physically impenetrable unless you have a safe passage…”
“Won’t he expect us after your little… show tonight?”
“No way. I was smart enough to cover my tracks. Plus, I designed a foolproof plan!”
Our cocky friend passed a steel orb between her thin fingers. The ball opened in two, revealing a miniature hologram projector. Two scantily clad young women suddenly emerged between the three of us. While grossly kissing as two snails copulating, they held the name and address of a “geisha” agency.
“Party on!” I said.
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“I understand the principle of disguising you,” I said to break the flight’s awkward silence. “But was I obliged to dress up too? This is beyond ridicule. You do know that I have a pedigree.”
Like the two sapiens, I wore a multicolored kimono and thin white silk socks. I was spared the traditional hairstyle and makeup, although this didn’t stop them laughing at my condition as a martyred cat.
Remind me to donate to PETA.
The ship swerved, indicating that we had set a course on the forbidden moon of Europa. We were the only ones aboard this flying coffin piloted by a web-covered android. King Xiao and his henchmen didn’t trust any humans when it came to joining their underwater retreat.
According to the agency, we were the third secret delivery since the beginning of the month. The previous few trips had been one-way which didn’t bode very well. That’s why I preferred reviewing our plan from the start. It was so clear that even Ali could memorize it in less than a day.
“We find Xiao; we kill Xiao; we tear his FID off his cold body. And finally, we steal the necklace containing his digital treasure’s last coordinates or whatever,” recited my human, checking her gun, well-hidden between her thighs.
Yet she didn’t seem comfortable. Something was worrying her. It must have reminded her too much of her past misadventures.
Zéphyr had also noticed the change in Ali’s attitude since she had announced this plan involving bypassing the prostitution network used by Xiao. “Are you okay?” the thief asked, making sure that the mechanical pilot was still focused on its work.
“No. I just don’t like being crammed in here like cattle for slaughter. Knowing what’s at the end…”
Zéphyr grabbed Ali’s face in her hands and kissed her. The Data Maiden then winked at her before continuing: “Let’s make sure this is the last delivery for this fat pig.”
Ali armed her Desert Eagle with iridescent reflections, ready to fight once on the spot. Zéphyr also checked her chrome daggers, and we remained silent until we reached the ice layer covering the hidden ocean of Europa.
Two hours later, we dived into the frozen waters of the abandoned moon in a cave specially designed to be a discreet entrance. It was then a long journey to the abyss. This same abyss possessed rudimentary life forms, brought back or not by the sapiens. As we got closer to our goal, the wildlife became more scattered before disappearing completely.
Illuminated by spotlights anchored to its walls, King Xiao’s sunken citadel cast its menacing shadow on the deep horizon. Up close, the underwater bunker was even more terrifying. It looked like the bloody fortress of Balmorya, the Goddess of Eyes, but hundreds of kilometers below the surface of Europa.
Once in the airlock preceding the reception hall, we were greeted by two thugs in black three-piece suits escorting an amphora-shaped tin can no bigger than a child. It was the robot who addressed us, inviting our group to follow him to his master’s lair: “Hurry up! We’re late! Late! Are you ready?”
Before we started moving, Zéphyr turned to Ali and whispered to her: “Will you be okay?”
My human trembled, but answered in the affirmative before I jumped on her shoulders to reassure her. “I’m here with you, little sapiens. Let’s give King Xiao the night of his life and go back playing Forgotten Quest on Thebe.”
She caressed me again before kissing me on the cheek. “Yes…” she said, answering the robot at the same time.
The former godfather’s castle was a veritable stronghold decorated with oil paintings, crimson draperies and shiny ceremonial weapons. We also saw some androids installing new canvases and communist antics recently purchased at the Ceres auction, a sign that further ships were connecting to the bunker. We had another way out if our convoy abandoned us to our fate.
The red doors leading to Xiao’s lair were guarded only by white porcelain vases and jade dragon statues. Indeed, patrols and servants were sparse. This was good news for our escape.
Two cyborgs were finally waiting for us at the end of a large scarlet doorway carved with the Triads’ underworld history. According to the automaton, it was time for the search, the most delicate moment. Especially since these improved humans had palpation implants. But fortunately, no IR nor scanner systems.
The sinister ogres examined the two guests while keeping a certain distance. When one of them wanted to put his hand between Ali’s legs, the robot ordered him to stop: “We don’t touch the Master’s threats!”
“Can’t you forget the protocol one minute, huh?” grunted the culprit.
The second guard stared at the three of us before brooding in his fake beard: “And the cat? Gotta be a snack!”
“It’s for the atmosphere, dear sir,” replied Zéphyr very diplomatically. “A touch of feline sweetness.”
“Silence!” cackled the automaton. “We’re late!”
The sentries nodded and opened the door to a small lavatory. I could feel Ali’s heart pounding as the robot escorted us through the curtain of pearls leading to Xiao’s personal apartments, a large hall covered with antique earthenware and punctuated by stone fountains. On the wall hung spears and shields of a forgotten Chinese dynasty. It was a remarkable collection.
But despite these idyllic aspects, the room was an antechamber of Hell. Between the marble columns were distributed what looked like various instruments of torture from all eras. Dozens of henchmen were waiting for us, their guns pointed in our direction.
“Bogus…” Zéphyr said, not knowing whether she should grab her knives or not.
“To say the least,” intervened one of the two cyborgs that had just appeared behind our backs.
The guards apprehended my two acolytes through the curtain of pearls while, grabbed by the scruff of the neck, I was pinned to the ground by the robot who later threw me into a magnetically locked cat carrier.
“Ali!” I shouted. “What is goi—”
King Xiao entered, his head bent between the two giants. The master of the Lost Triads measured easily within three meters. He didn’t have the stature of a 90-year-old grandfather at all despite his long white beard and shaved skull covered with brownish spots and glowing microchips. I saw some of them turning red before the godfather’s nose started losing drops of blood. He then stared at Zéphyr before chuckling. “Don’t even try speed-hacking us, fool!” he said with the deepest voice I’ve ever heard in all my lives. “This could backfire badly.”
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