Mark's voice softened, like he understood, "I won't call you baby."
"Thanks."
"Unless..."
"Unless?"
"Unless you act like one."
I sat down on my desk chair, "I won't."
"I mean, I want to be friends with you, but not if you act like a baby."
I didn't even think about anything he did to me before that; I didn't want to lose my one chance at having a friend, "I won't."
He looked at me for what felt like a minute before saying anything.
"Okay," he finally said.
I breathed a sigh of relief.
"Look, it's okay." He took on his friendly tone again, "I get it. I mean, you don't have a dad. My dad tells me if I'm doing wrong."
"I have my mom," I pointed out.
He looked over at the stuffed animals and picked up Sam, my favorite one I've had longer than any others. He inspected it.
"Yeah, but your mom isn't always going to tell you when you're acting like a baby, is she?"
I was dying to snatch Sam back from him, but I held myself back. I figured it would be babyish.
He looked at me again, "What if I tell you when you're acting like a baby?"
I looked into Sam's eyes, "What do you mean?"
He started playing with Sam's arms with each word.
Please don't hurt Sam.
"I mean, if you act like a baby, I'll tell you, like a dad would. I'll tell you if you're being wrong."
I was getting really nervous. I was afraid to look directly at Mark.
He threw Sam across the room onto the floor.
Get him later, I told myself and looked at Mark again.
"Thank you."
"I'm hungry," he said, " want to go out and get something?"
I nodded. Inside, I was excited. This was huge to me, but I knew it would be babyish if I acted excited, so I stayed calm.
"We can go to Marty's," I suggested. That was a little pizza place a lot of kids went to, but I usually avoided it in case I ran into people like Mark.
But now he was my friend.
We headed out of my bedroom and for the front door.
"Hold on," I told him just before we left, "I forgot my wallet."
I ran back to my bedroom and put Sam back on the bed.
I already had my wallet in my pocket.
We talked all the way down to Marty's about movies and how amazed he was that I didn't have any streaming channels. He was being nice, and I tried my best not to overreact or be childish. It made me more nervous, but it seemed okay. I really felt like he was my friend by the time we got there twenty minutes later.
We both ordered a slice and a soft drink. He had pepperoni on his, and I had double cheese.
"It's so good," I told him.
He took a bite of his slice.
"I really like it," I said.
He took another bite.
"Do you like yours?" I asked him.
He put his slice down on his plate and looked at me in disbelief.
"You're doing it."
I wasn't sure what he was talking about, "Doing what?"
He suddenly raised his voice.
"YOU'RE ACTING LIKE A BABY."
Everyone looked at our table. I was embarrassed. I had no idea what I did wrong.
"I'm sorry," I said to him quietly.
He picked up his pizza again and pointed it at me, quieter this time, "Don't do it again."
I could tell he was angry, and I was afraid to ask just then what I did.
It was a good thing I did.
On the walk home, I risked the question, "Back there, what did I do wrong?"
We stopped walking.
"Are you serious?" He was seriously angry.
I was scared to answer.
He started yelling again, "YOU WERE BEING A WHINER, YOU WERE BEGGING, YOU WERE ACTING EMBARASSING."
He was so mad; I thought he had already decided he couldn't be my friend.
"I HATE your whiny little voice, 'how is it? Do you like yours?'" He made my voice sound all high-pitched.
"I'm sorry," I said again.
He poked me in the chest again, "You know, my dad would be so pissed off."
"I'm sorry."
"Do you want to be my friend or not?"
"Yes! I do!" I knew I sounded desperate, but that's how I felt.
He poked me again, "I get punished if I act like that."
I was scared, "I won't do it again, I swear."
He poked me even harder, "You better not."
After Mark left that afternoon, I tried to make sense of everything. I really wanted to act right in front of him, but I could already see it wasn't going to be easy. All I was trying to do at lunch was talk and be nice, and somehow I got it all wrong.
But I figured I deserved to be yelled at, even if other people heard it.
He was my friend, after all.
I trusted him.
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