~}•{~

Ugh! I want to have sex already! But I don't know how too! Yeah I know how to prepare because of Google. . . Wash out, foreplay, yada yada yada, all of that! But, what do I do during it? How loud do I moan? How many times do I kiss him? When do I cum?! 

I need directions, just simple directions. Yeah, I can watch porn. . . Which I have already, but how do I know that they are doing it correctly? They are getting paid. Then they are homemade I can watch, but how do I know that even they are doing it right?

But I need a boyfriend first, I just don't want a one night stand. I never even had a boyfriend. . . I don't know what to do. I barely even have any friends because, simply, no one wants to hang around me. 

I just want a simple order, I just like things neat and organized. . . And my way. And the ones that stuck around me are barely straight in the mind. One of my friends loves anime, I do too but he is an extremists on anime. You can say weeaboo? He loves to keep his figures nice and neat and in order from the type on anime, then goes from protagonist, then antagonist.

A lot is said from my mouth and I do not care, I piss off my professor a couple of times, asking if I can come by his house and discuss on the topic of how he can save me a set in the way front, straight dab in the middle. Of course he said no, but I am a persistent type of guy. 

~}•{~

"What am I gonna do Joe?" I asked my friend, I sat on his bed waiting for a response. 

"Whoa!" He got extremely excited when he opened the box. 

"Joe!"

"Hold on hold on! Takano-chan from season five episode twelve, the war against dark and light! Her fighting outfit, red and black tights and a small skin tight shirtis right here in my hands!"

I scratched my head. "Can you listen to me now?"

"Let me put her right here. . . There, just perfect!"

I let out breath. "Joe I don't like to yell."

"Of course you don't. Now what were you saying?"

"I said. . . What am I gonna do?"

"Oh, about that whole having sex thing?"

"Yeah, about that."

"Don't look at me. The only time I had sex was on my bed with a 3D version of Hiroshi-kun. . . I'm still a virgin."

". . . When was the last time you washed your sheets?" I asked, getting up. 

"Um. . . About. . . I remember waiting for my new system to come because I broke my other one because of the humongous amount of hentai on my old one. . . Messed the whole system up."

"I am getting sick and tired of calling your name, answer the question now."

"Six months ago."

"Ugh! Thats sick! You need a schedule for the days you need to wash your covers and sheets. Plus to just clean your apartment in general."

"I am a grown ass man living on his own and going to college. Plus my apartment is small, just with all of these hot babes in here makes it more smaller."

"Listen, I heard from someone. . . Well I overheard that you have a brother and that he. . . You know. . ." I started waving my hands around. "Knowing that we are friends, it breaks my dearest. . ."

"You want to get with my brother." 

"Hey don't look at me like that."

"He's dumb, he doesn't like your type, he will think that you are crazy, he plays people, and the worse part of his personality is that he calls my sexy collection stupid."

"Well nevermind then." I looked over his room and I looked at his computer. "Listen, I'll buy you whatever you want. . . If! You help me with my situation."

"What you want me to do? I'm not gay."

"You are good on the computer."

"Yeah. . . With finding my women."

"Fine. . . A new deal, I'll find you a pretty girl if you help." He started to think. "Think of your penis on this one. 

"Deal."

~}•{~

Walking to my class is a progress that needs to be completed every single time. People act like they don't have classes to go to. And it irritates me when they are all over the place in circles, what ever shape. Why can't there be a section where you can talk and where you can walk, Plus a section of the school were when you can walk and talk? 

Then right after my thought ended some dumbass guy that wasn't paying attention because he was talking bumped into me!

"Sir watch where you are going. You weren't paying attention." I said in a professional tone. 

"Oh. . . I'm sorry." He responded with a big smile.

"Why. . ."

"Why are you smiling so big for? You have me, don't fucking do that!" The guy beside him yelled in his face. 

I looked really confused. . . Oh. . . Oh! Oh shit both of them are gay. What do we gay people do again?! There was no manual for this. . . I need it written!!!

"What wrong with you? You never seen gay people before?" The one that bumped into me had said. 

"Yes, yes I have. Me and my friend Joe. . ."

"Hold up. . . The one that collects stupid Japanese toys?"

"Ye- yes. Thats the one."

"Thats my brother. Why is a well cleaned guy like you hanging around smelly greasy haired guy like by brother?"

"Um. . . I. . . I have to get to class."

"Wa-" I pushed through them both and headed to class. 

That was Joe's brother?! A hot guy like him and Joe?! Some one got a different parent between them. . . Or they are not even related by blood at all. But it's a shame that he already has a boyfriend. But doesn't he play people?

~}•{~

"Joe, Joe, get off your laptop, class is about to start." I made it to class and of course my professor didn't leave that spot for me. . . I have to have a conversation again about it. 

"Wait. . . The Season ten Episode twenty-three, The Devastation of the Creator, Momo Takasawa, outfit gold and blue. . . I have to have it!" His mouth was basically drilling at this point. 

"Just. . ."

"No!!! What the fuck?!"

I looked over him and I saw something liquid on the desks. "Whoa!" I moved all my binders and papers. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean too!" The girl kept apologizing, but he wouldn't listen. 

"Joe calm down."

"How can I?! My laptop!" 

He was going through a breakdown so I made a hard decision to either help my friend or to stay and learn the lesson for today. 

But my decision was made when the professor told me to go with him out the class. 

"You have three other ones. . . Just use them." I told him. 

"Come on Josh. You know I have a laptop for a special use. That one was my school one, and sometimes for buying things." He was doing hand motions. "Ah, great." He said stopping. He handed me his laptop and started to detour the other way. 

"Hey Joe!" Oh dang. I can see his brother heading our way. "Oh hey dude that I saw earlier."

I just stood and looked back at Joe. He was still walking, pretending not to hear. 

"Joe!" His brother started to run to get to him. 

I couldn't hear what they said and I just walked towards them. 

"So you met my brother already." Joe told me. 

"He just bumped into me that is all." I replied. "He was being negligent on his surroundings."

"I can see that. . . Bet he had another 'toy' with him."

"Why are you all up in my life for? What I do is my business and mines alone. I'm getting tired of you ruining my game. . . Telling people. . . Bet I could of had twice the amount of sex."

"He has the right too. He's protecting others from your grasps and your sweet talk. Those people that you played actually thought you cared, but of course you don't. . . You just use them for your sexual pleasures." I could have went longer but his face looked like he wasn't paying attention. 

"I don't like people like you." He responded. 

"Yeah, Joe told me already."

"Why are you bringing me up for?" He turned to Joe and nudged him a bit. 

"You know me, I will never put your name in conversations, I rather talk about things that are important." Joe told his brother. 

His brother turned to me. "Why you wanted to know about me?"

"Just for reasons." I said. "Joe we have to go."

"You just dodged the question. . . You want to go out with me?"

"Now I don't. . ."

"So before you did?"

"Can you shut up? Didn't you say you didn't like my type? Going back on your own word."

"I do, but they are usually ugly." He gave me a cheeky smile. 

"You can't get with my friend." Joe came back in. 

"Why not? You like him or something?"

"No."

"Oh yeah, you would rather have sex with plastic than a cute body like his."

"I am not cute!" I yelled. "Sorry for my outburst. But I don't like being called that."

"Have you ever been called cute before?" It sounded like his brother was interrogating us. . . What is he trying to prove?

"You don't have to know, that is my business and mines only. . . Like you said before."

"I am stupid, but I defiantly have more common sense than the both of you. . . And you have never been called that."

"I. . . I have to get back to class." I said. "Here is your laptop Joe." I handed it back to him and went back to class. 

~}•{~

"Sorry about my brother." Joe said. We were at my apartment, trying to self learn the lesson. 

"He doesn't have a good personality at all, why would I want someone like that?"

"Well that's good."

"But I still want to have sex with someone that I know at least. But the only person I know is you. . ."

"Yeah, you need some more friends." He responded nervously. 

"You do too."

"Who else would deal with my personality?"

"Same. No one would put up with mine, only you in some sense."

"Okay! I know that we both have the same idea right now!"

"What are you talking about?" The way that the conversation was going, was never how we usually talk. It's usually me yelling at him to listen to what I have to say, while he is buying a new anime character online. 

"You know what. I see this a lot in my anime shows. We both talk about how we want these relationships. Then at the end we talk about how we don't have anyone but each other then we realise that we are made for each other!"

"So you want to have sex with me?" I asked. 

"I really wanted it to be a girl but, I feel like it can work out."

"The sex part?"

"Um. . . The whole going out part."

"Okay. . . But I need a manual."

"Why?!"

"I have to know where you would like to go, what you like in me so I can keep up the appearance, many of things."

"You should already know that. . . Aren't we friends?"

"Yes we are, but I like things in writting. You know me."

"This relationship is not going to end well."

"Why you say that?" I asked. 

"I might cheat on you with Hiroshi-kun."

"I wouldn't blame you. . . She's not real after all."

"I know that you don't like being touched. . ." He pounced on me, flopping me off my bed onto the floor. He was stronger than me by far and he was on top of me. "Hiroshi-kun is. . ."

We just looked at each other. "Um. . . This is awkward. Do we kiss?"

"Just like in anime!!! Yes! Yes!"

We started kissing and I had looked it up before, don't be to forceful, touch your partner. 

My first reaction was to touch his hair. As I touched it I pushed back. "Wash your hair please? It is greasy. And it's touching my head. My head is greasy now."

"Then. . ."

"Yeah, you go in the kitchen to do that, I'll go into the bathroom and do what I have to do."

~}•{~