These two have been rivals for years, and now they’re finally going to settle the score once and for all.
With a roast battle for the ages.
Ashton walked into the homeroom with a swagger, ready to unleash his best insults on Angelina. He had been practicing all night, coming up with witty and savage roasts that would make her cry.
He approached her desk, where she was sitting calmly, reading a book. He cleared his throat and said loudly, “Hey, Angie. I hope you’re ready for the roast of your life. Because I’m about to burn you so bad, you’ll need a fire extinguisher.”
The class turned their attention to the two of them, sensing the tension in the air. They knew this was going to be epic. They had been waiting for this moment for a long time.
Angelina looked up from her book and smiled sweetly at him. She closed the book and placed it on her desk. She said softly, “Ashton, I’m so glad you could make it. Don’t worry, I promise to make my victory quick. After all, I wouldn’t want to keep you from your next masterpiece of a stick figure.”
The class erupted into cheers and laughter. They all began surrounding her and complimented the roast.
“Nice one, Angie!” someone shouted.
“Ouch, that hurt!” someone else said.
Ashton felt a surge of anger and embarrassment. He hated how she always acted so cool and superior. He hated how she always made fun of his drawings. He hated how she always got the best grades and the most popularity. He hated how he loved her.
He said with a smirk, “Yeah, you’re right. I got some inspiration for the next one.”
“Which is?” she prompted.
“You. You’re so boring I might fall asleep while drawing you.” He said, hoping to get a reaction from her.
She raised an eyebrow and said with a smug smile, “That roast was so weak it made me want to draw a picture of it. But then I realized… even the doodles I draw when I’m bored in class are more creative than it.”
The class oohed and aah’d at her comeback. They clapped and cheered for her, some even whistling.
Ash gasped. He couldn’t believe she had just dissed his art skills again. He said, trying to sound confident, “Your web comic is so bad, it made me go back to reading the newspaper… and that’s saying something, cause… cause the paper is full of nothing but fake news and ads.”
She rolled her eyes and said sarcastically, “Wow, Ashton, you’re so original. Did you get that roast from the internet? Because I’ve heard it a thousand times before.”
His joke fell flat with the class. They booed and mocked him mercilessly. A girl - who was infamous for snacking in class - even hurled her Skittles box at him.
He felt his face turn red with humiliation. He had to think of something better. Something that would make her speechless. Something that would make her regret ever messing with him.
But before he could say anything, Angelina blurted out, “Ashton, your crush on me is so one-sided it’s like talking to a brick wall.”
The class fell silent. They stared at him with shock and disbelief. They couldn’t believe she had just revealed his feelings for her in front of everyone.
Angelina’s eyes widened as she looked left and right. She felt a pang of guilt and pity in her chest. She had always known he liked her, but she never felt the same way. Ash felt his heart sink in his chest. He knew she didn’t love him back, but hearing her say it out loud was like stabbing a knife in his gut.
He stuttered, “I know my crush on you is strong, but… at least I’m not… as desperate as you are.”
She frowned and said with confusion, “What do you mean by that?”
Ashton felt his cheeks heat up with embarrassment. He couldn’t believe himself. He embarrassed himself in front of his classmates, but more importantly, in front of the girl he liked.
And that was when the secret came out that Ashton loved Angelina. “I knew it! I knew it!!” came a voice from the crowd. Leann’s voice. “He broke up with me for her!”
Leann, what does your breakup have to do with anything?” Angie asked, raising an eyebrow at her. Ash sighed heavily, and rolled his eyes.
“Can we please just continue the roast battle?!” Ashton shouted impatiently.
“No need, because I think Angie already won,” Leann said.
“Not so fast,” said another voice from the crowd. It was Mr. Phillips, the homeroom teacher. “I think we should let the audience decide who won this roast battle.”
He pulled out his phone and opened an app that allowed him to create a poll. He typed in the names of Ashton and Angelina and asked the class to vote for their favorite roaster.
The class quickly took out their phones and voted on the app. The teacher waited for a few seconds and then announced the results.
“And the winner is…”
He paused for dramatic effect.
“…Angelina!” He said.
The class felt impressed by Angelina’s roasting skills and voted for her as the winner. They also felt sorry for Ashton and his unrequited love. They decided to help him win Angelina’s heart by giving him advice, setting up dates, and cheering him on. Ashton appreciated their support, but wondered if he really had a chance with Angelina, after embarrassing himself in front of her.
The next day, Ashton was greeted by his classmates with smiles and encouragement. They told him that he did a great job in the roast battle, and that he shouldn’t give up on his crush. They also gave him some tips on how to impress Angelina, such as complimenting her, making her laugh, and showing interest in her hobbies.
Ashton thanked them for their kindness, but felt nervous and doubtful. He wasn’t sure if he could follow their advice, or if Angelina would even notice him. He had always been somewhat shy and awkward around her, and she had always been cool and confident. He felt like they were from different worlds. Their only interactions were arguments, most of the time.
He decided to try again anyway, hoping that maybe she would see him in a different light. He approached her during lunch break, sitting alone with a tray of food and a storybook. He said with a smile, “Hey, Angie. Can I sit with you?”
She looked up from her book and nodded. “Yeah, sure.” she shrugged.
He sat down next to her and tried to make small talk. He said with a compliment, “You were amazing yesterday in the roast battle. You really showed everyone who’s the boss.”
She replied, “Thanks. So were you!”
He blushed and said with a joke, “Yeah, well, I learned from the best. You know, you’re so good at roasting, you should have your own show.”
She laughed and said sarcastically, “Yeah, right. And you should be my co-host.”
He grinned and said with interest, “That would be awesome. So, what are you reading?”
“Fantasy,” she muttered, holding up the novel.
“What do you have next period?”
“Home Science, what about you?”
“Same here,”
“Why do we even have home science? It’s pretty much useless…” Angie said with a small groan.
“Not unless it’s for a challenge. We’ll have a bake-off.” he replied, with a cocky grin.
“An unexpected third round, I see…” Angelina nodded. “I like it,”
“No, an unexpected fourth and fifth round too. Best of five wins!” he beamed.
“You have one, I have one. So two more points?”
“Yep,”
“Let’s do this!” they cheered in unison.
Angelina said with a smile, “You know, Ashton, you’re not so bad after all. You’re actually pretty nice and smart.” making the boy blush.
They exchanged a handshake, then parted ways.
The bake-off was during home science class. Ashton and Angelina had agreed to make cupcakes, and whoever made the best ones would win the third round of their challenge. They had their ingredients and equipment prepared and they were ready to show off their baking skills.
They set up their stations in opposite corners of the kitchen, and began to mix their batter. Ashton decided to make chocolate cupcakes with vanilla frosting and sprinkles. He thought they were simple but delicious, and he hoped Angelina would like them too. He had a secret crush on her for a long time, and he wanted to impress her with his sweet treats. He knew he had the upper hand, considering his mother was a chef, so he used it to the fullest.
They mixed, stirred and whisked their batter with determination and courage. With love and passion, they blended, beat and whipped their icing. They carefully transferred their batter into cupcake liners, then into the oven, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness.
After 30 minutes, they peeked into the oven, hoping to see fluffy golden cupcakes. Instead, they saw a tray of dark and crispy lumps. Their cupcakes were burnt to a crisp. It was too late.
The class gasped in shock and disbelief. They couldn’t believe that both Ashton and Angelina had both burnt the cupcakes. The two looked at each other with pity and sadness.
They discovered that they shared more similarities than they expected, and gave each other a slight smile. This smile widened and grew, until it turned into a fit of hysteric laughter.
Their home science teacher smiled at the duo and said, “Well, this is unexpected. But I guess it means that you both get a point for this round. Congratulations.”
He then said with a slight frown, “But don’t get too comfortable. You’re still losing marks on your internals for the burnt cupcakes. Ash, Angie. May I choose the next round for you?”
“Sure, we don’t have anything else in mind.” Ashton replied.
He then revealed what the next round was going to be: A rap battle.
The class cheered in excitement and anticipation. They knew this was going to be epic. They had been waiting for this moment since the first day of middle school.
Ashton and Angelina felt a surge of adrenaline and anxiety. They knew this was going to be hard. They had never rapped before, let alone in front of everyone.
They wondered how they were going to pull this off.
They decided to give it their best shot, hoping that maybe they would impress each other and the audience with their rhymes.
Are you ready for the rap battle of the century?
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