I sat alone in my room, staring at the walls, but seeing nothing. I was unaware of the silent tears on my face. I was trying to get myself together, but I couldn't. I knew it was my fault, but I also knew that made no sense. It was her fault, but I knew I might have pushed her into it. I didn't mean to. I didn't want to. But I did. 643Please respect copyright.PENANAAtKIFFsUCk
So I stayed in that position for hours, in the dead of night. My playlist stopped and so did my trance of blame and emptiness. It wasn't my fault. But I couldn't stop that little voice in the back of my mind telling me it was.643Please respect copyright.PENANA6HNkoJPsn8
I didn't want to be like this. I wanted to be happy. I wanted to be nice. I wanted to be anyone but me.
So I thought about I could turn on the light in my brain, not just my easy fake smiles and laughs. I looked for the switch. Lumos! I thought, hoping.
Nox, the voice replied. 643Please respect copyright.PENANAdKrZaTog5u
" You can hide your darkness from others," I said, "but you can never hide it from yourself."643Please respect copyright.PENANAx07rnqVjtn
My light switch was hidden. Not even that. It was broken beyond repair. I wanted so hard to fix it, but it would take a miracle. And I don't believe in those.
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