x
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由於已經做了不少次彩排,因此大家很快就進入狀況了,每個人有條不紊地換上戲服、上妝,已經換裝完畢的人則是開始專心地背台詞,以求等等上台不要忘詞。13Please respect copyright.PENANAESr9YRESG4
雖然這次籃球部是因為雖小才被抽到,但是依照赤司要求完美的個性,等等要是誰上台忘詞導致這齣戲有了瑕疵的話……13Please respect copyright.PENANAPG355KeQgY
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會死的!!!!13Please respect copyright.PENANAaoBoxPcqE3
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──後臺所有人不約而同地想到了同一句話。13Please respect copyright.PENANApOry6U7OQi
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※13Please respect copyright.PENANAQPnsIuyIvi
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很快地就到了開演的時間,伴隨著開演前的鈴響,紅色的帷幕往兩旁拉開,台下還在鼓譟的觀眾們也安靜了下來。13Please respect copyright.PENANAW9h9b36Ouc
『從前從前,有一個很小的國家,這個國家因為太小也太偏僻了,所以一直都沒有遭到其他國家的侵略,過著相當封閉而自給自足的生活。』13Please respect copyright.PENANArrXwXsSrPn
13Please respect copyright.PENANAj5hvACaM31
擔任旁白的是綠間,當初在分配角色跟工作的時候,不知道是誰說了一句綠間的聲音很低沉一定很適合唸床邊故事,所以赤司就讓他去當旁白了,反正綠間打死也不想上台,旁白半幕後的性質倒是很合他。13Please respect copyright.PENANAYBHGdkXiHF
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『然而最特別的地方是……這個國家是由兩位美麗的公主來統治的。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAflhAqo5tEn
13Please respect copyright.PENANAwWnw87QQqT
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隨著綠間低沉的聲線,兩個穿著華麗貴氣的女孩款款走上了舞台,其中一位是桃井五月,連續兩年票選為男生心目中完美女神的著名籃球部經理人,但另一位有著水藍長髮,面容清秀的「女孩」……毫無疑問,絕對是黑子哲也本人。13Please respect copyright.PENANAq6KWHMwFx0
13Please respect copyright.PENANA38IRMla8Iu
「哎呀、藍色頭髮的那個是誰啊?也是籃球部的經理嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAriTvR89saR
「好可愛喔,雖然沒有桃井同學那麼漂亮,可是氣質好好呢~」13Please respect copyright.PENANAXgZvtTURjU
13Please respect copyright.PENANAWCUcYILfnF
顯然台下的學生也對黑子的女生扮相非常驚艷,只不過台上的黑子眼神卻又更死了幾分,好在舞台光打得夠強,沒有人注意到小公主的表情幾乎可以稱得上是神經壞死狀態。13Please respect copyright.PENANATmJ9BYn74b
13Please respect copyright.PENANAhe8JEkXakc
瞥了一眼在舞台兩側待命的隊友明顯在憋笑的舉動,黑子的心情又更惡劣了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAP3B6zgAnMz
13Please respect copyright.PENANALRWKnvCtpJ
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『兩位公主是一對姐妹,姐妹彼此相依為命,將國家治理得非常富庶。王國的人民都非常愛戴公主們,身為姐姐的大公主對於小公主百般疼愛,也希望妹妹能嫁給心愛的人過著幸福快樂的生活……』13Please respect copyright.PENANA3JAHvth3aa
13Please respect copyright.PENANArlQmmk4ZcN
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大公主拉著小公主的手來到舞台中間,圍著桌子坐了下來。大公主將妹妹的手緊緊握著,非常關切地看著小公主。(桃井內心的os:摸到哲君的手了!好希望可以握久一點……!)13Please respect copyright.PENANAXX8T4nTZwk
13Please respect copyright.PENANAFfL1nBNqsO
「妹妹,父王跟母后過世前交代我要好好照顧妳,現在妳也長大了,差不多是時候結婚了……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAMm11IFgnUO
「姐姐,我不想嫁人。」小公主搖搖頭。13Please respect copyright.PENANA5m6OEI9thz
「那怎麼行,女孩子總是要嫁人的呀!上次那個鄰國的王子……長什麼樣子有點忘了……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAAwxCCKMluT
「一頭金髮看起來很自戀的那位?」善良的小公主提醒了自家姐姐。13Please respect copyright.PENANAHH9Zmu2j0I
「啊對!那個傢伙對妳不是還蠻有意思的?每天都站在妳的窗戶前唱情歌,長得也還算順眼……小妹妳喜歡他嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAIhIB1ODs4I
「王子是個好人,不過太煩了。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAGJjCLaSSjk
「也是,那前一陣子殺掉九頭惡龍的勇者呢?雖然黑了點不過應該還可以忍受,小妹妳喜歡這種的?」13Please respect copyright.PENANASCGvROnA5W
「姐姐妳忘了我以前在學院唸書的時候可是曾經把勇者大人的內褲掛在行政塔的最頂端喔?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAET2VAZkRVe
「呃,好像是有這麼一回事……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAY4LAVJq8wW
13Please respect copyright.PENANANoHXcQcws2
『大公主終於想起自家的妹妹會到這麼大還嫁不出去,最重要的原因就是在於小公主實在太可怕了,每一個曾經追求過小公主的男性都慘遭打擊,以至於留下了終生的創傷……』13Please respect copyright.PENANAkE0d1bOrBV
13Please respect copyright.PENANAkOhtGSl5Y3
綠間一絲不苟的唸著劇本上的台詞,明明是很搞笑的內容卻被唸的正經八百,台下的觀眾笑得更大聲了,顯然這種惡搞式的劇情對他們來說更有趣。13Please respect copyright.PENANAOxcpqPzQJi
13Please respect copyright.PENANAVRkhLq0MUd
「唉,怎麼辦呢……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAd7EpXHJVKZ
「既然這樣的話,不如就給了我吧。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAL0RDcgrDzx
13Please respect copyright.PENANANHaJMxOvEg
突然之間憑空響起了一個男人的聲音,舞台突然暗了下來,燈光開始瘋狂地一閃一滅著,恐怖詭異的背景音樂響起,超大電風扇吹得舞台上沒有被固定的東西都在狂飛。13Please respect copyright.PENANA5sNieVipbb
等到燈光終於穩定下來時,舞台上卻已經沒有小公主的身影了!13Please respect copyright.PENANAM0ljwos9fR
13Please respect copyright.PENANA5yPuuiAYUW
「你是誰?把我妹妹還給我!」13Please respect copyright.PENANARrqmGwBhez
「我當然是魔王,愚蠢的女人,小公主我就帶走了,有本事的話就派勇者來擊敗我吧!」13Please respect copyright.PENANARqmmBA6VRX
「妹妹!妹妹!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAvo9m5jubZh
13Please respect copyright.PENANAYdc3Z3UBZD
大公主跪倒在地上悲傷地喊叫著,此刻紅色簾幕緩緩拉上了,第一幕到這裡結束。13Please respect copyright.PENANA6EVn3REK82
觀眾們小聲地討論著劇情,過了沒多久,簾幕又再一次拉開了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAR3Rmke4xXq
13Please respect copyright.PENANAwVkIJbVO3l
第二幕的場景是森林,舞台中間沒有人,綠間的聲音再度響起。13Please respect copyright.PENANAc9TdTImgwg
13Please respect copyright.PENANAu08pXjKKEc
13Please respect copyright.PENANAeGZ1vuRYd9
『小公主被魔王抓走之後,傷心欲絕的大公主發出了懸賞公告,誰能救回小公主,她就將心愛的妹妹嫁給那個人,並附送黃金萬斤當作嫁妝。勇者和鄰國的王子一聽到這個消息都各自整裝行囊準備去討伐魔王了。』13Please respect copyright.PENANA5v5o2c3c8J
13Please respect copyright.PENANACk4MWEBVdu
這時從舞台右側走出一個穿著華麗的金髮少年,當他一出場,台下的女孩子紛紛激動地尖叫了起來,大概都是些「涼太大人我們愛你」之類的話。13Please respect copyright.PENANATtcnJarF3D
金髮的少年聽到女孩們的尖叫也笑著和台下揮手,引起一片更大聲的抽氣與尖叫。13Please respect copyright.PENANAbMwBhRdb2t
13Please respect copyright.PENANAGx6psQusJA
跟在王子後面的紫髮隨從在沒人看的到地方翻了翻白眼,毫不掩飾眼中的鄙視。13Please respect copyright.PENANAE60v5fSXUB
13Please respect copyright.PENANAkLuJLIZBZI
──可以再愛現一點嘛!13Please respect copyright.PENANANvjcS1KHh6
13Please respect copyright.PENANA6SYYaV5ZVE
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這時候從舞台左側走出一個穿著勇者裝束的黑皮膚(真的很黑!)少年,勇者狠狠地瞪著王子,看起來似乎來意不善。13Please respect copyright.PENANAACwutwGvQI
13Please respect copyright.PENANAbBJbZIE2Sc
「喂,白癡王子,你該不會也是要去救小公主的吧?」13Please respect copyright.PENANA21CnY5pilU
「哼哼那還用說,只要我這次救出了小公主,她一定會感動到自願嫁給我的……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAosSaPpwErI
「小白臉,你以為憑你的三腳貓身手能打敗魔王嗎?我看你連魔王城堡前的庭院都走不到!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAkYbUc63stF
「沒關係我可是有手下的!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAuqoKDNoMYu
「你以為小公主會喜歡你嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAY0IhlO5fQp
「至少我不像某人曾經被小公主整到臉都丟光了。」13Please respect copyright.PENANA7FSLF5z7wL
「你這傢伙……找死嗎?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAdPuHLq6B8X
13Please respect copyright.PENANAvNDifYOums
兩個人在台上齜牙咧嘴地打起架來了,雖然是演戲的必要橋段,不過多多少少還是有公報私仇的意味在裡頭,台下還不時可以聽到涼太大人加油的支持聲,然後帷幕拉上,第二幕到這裡結束。13Please respect copyright.PENANAb6EAgcoSUN
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第三幕沒有讓觀眾等太久,帷幕便拉開了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAVrw5ama7hZ
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『勇者與王子在路上一見如故,於是決定結伴而行一起去討伐魔王,並約定好要公平競爭。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAHcSgvzkzYM
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「可惡,我的馬怎麼跑不動了?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAWApmtDLH3w
「該死!誰在我的晚餐裡下瀉藥──」13Please respect copyright.PENANAKFyXivuMw8
「小白臉我告訴你我跟小公主是青梅竹馬長大的,她絕對會選我不選你的!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAQUkSYUiXIw
「死黑皮我告訴你小公主跟我一定是兩情相悅的,每次我在她宮殿前唱歌她都用含情脈脈的眼光看著我哦!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAIuNdbfjhi3
13Please respect copyright.PENANAQC5XSotJ4W
「……兩個白癡。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAgqSIicFGwi
王子的高大隨從不屑地瞥了兩個蠢蛋一眼,哼哼地表示鄙視。13Please respect copyright.PENANAKFpzaDqOqS
13Please respect copyright.PENANA0k9OkN8d2Q
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『在經歷過千辛萬苦之後,王子與勇者終於來到魔王的城堡了,兩人一路上互相扶持,共同打倒了魔王派出來的各種魔物……』13Please respect copyright.PENANALgSeKkm84G
13Please respect copyright.PENANAUTCjH4eSbv
「白癡王子閃邊啦你擋到我的路了!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAN5LEFG7jax
「吵死了你以為剛剛的魔物是誰打倒的啊?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANA0zi5OP9f3W
「要不是我補上那一擊你以為你還能在這裡唱秋?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANA2oJB47Cvm9
「@#$%^&*!#%$%……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAfp6X81xpiM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAtxagUFfA1X
『最後,他們終於好不容易來到魔王面前了,而被抓走的小公主也在,王子與勇者看到這一幕都非常憤怒。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAOervRQ9hae
「混帳啊啊啊把你的手從那個公主的腰上拿走啊啊啊──!!!」勇者悲憤莫名的怒吼道。13Please respect copyright.PENANAWkngTYqux7
「嗚啊啊啊小公主的腰連我都沒有摸過你怎麼可以@#$%^&*……」哭到泣不成聲的王子。13Please respect copyright.PENANAQwLn3IyA7V
13Please respect copyright.PENANA5g3oT1wQkp
現身在兩人面前的是赤髮的俊美魔王,魔王一手攬著小公主的纖腰,臉上噙著高深莫測的微笑,風姿颯爽地登場了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAMihy0LTkqM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAA9ULB8idCz
「喔呀、大公主派出來的就是這種程度的貨色嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAMZq2aOXugn
魔王嘴角挑起,用頗為失禮的語氣詢問被他摟在懷裡的小公主(完完全全的惡意啊)。13Please respect copyright.PENANAbgRKlPzxFM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAHFgWyRawOo
小公主看起來似乎很僵硬,最詭異的還是那張自始至終都沒有過變化的平板表情。13Please respect copyright.PENANAqJtwqCbCix
13Please respect copyright.PENANAQCFMB01Stt
「可惡的魔王快放開我,鄰國的王子殿下跟英勇的勇者大人啊,快來救我吧!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAHe0w8esU0q
13Please respect copyright.PENANAupASD7Lzo9
老老實實待在魔王懷裡的小公主用著異常平淡的語氣唸出台詞,冷靜到零點以下的語氣一時之間讓台上的氣氛似乎有種瞬間下降兩三度的錯覺。13Please respect copyright.PENANA41oJsGtzqp
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「……」13Please respect copyright.PENANADBrTXnqTcp
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(「哲也,叫得太假了。」)13Please respect copyright.PENANA48oKX2L32n
(「啊,抱歉,我會嘗試改善的,不過對於這樣歇斯底里的台詞我實在很難苟同。」)13Please respect copyright.PENANAEPaiPeYfRy
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13Please respect copyright.PENANAewvuccSbjs
現場一陣冷場之後,王子跟勇者總算繼續唸出下面的台詞了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAomDY63QYfo
13Please respect copyright.PENANA1fACH7hmtI
「該、該死的魔王!今天我就要代替公義與真理消滅你!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAloa43OjFC7
「沒錯!還不快點放開小公主!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAAoSXsMihMM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAokUxqnE7u8
王子與勇者紛紛抽出配戴的寶劍準備殺過去了,到了這裡接下來就是王子與勇者成功打倒魔王,並且順利救出公主的皆大歡喜結局,而在救出公主之後難免會有一些摟摟抱抱牽牽小手啦……之類的必要接觸(咦)。13Please respect copyright.PENANAOFD5qm7UKx
然而、然而,雖然總是被視為心思深沉高高在上在籃球部內說東沒人敢往西的絕對帝王,赤司征十郎有些時候在某種程度上來說卻是意外的任性和……佔有慾強烈。13Please respect copyright.PENANAfWmirF5IJH
13Please respect copyright.PENANAGUW3X0GGaU
面對那兩個明顯一臉就是「快點把這裡的情節交代完救出公主之後就可以跟哲/小黑子這樣又那樣」的傢伙,赤司突然覺得心裡有一點點莫名的不爽,就像晚餐準備要吃湯豆腐結果超市店員卻一臉歉意地說豆腐缺貨的感覺。13Please respect copyright.PENANAb4UtVA11rs
13Please respect copyright.PENANA8ewVeYomUs
魔王大人唇角忽然勾起一抹讓人心驚膽戰的笑容,看到那樣的笑而本能感到一陣寒顫兩人不知為何突然有了不好的預感,但是已經來不及停下來了──13Please respect copyright.PENANAYYzZpBmoDa
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「呃?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANABjXDcOtca9
「呀啊!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAiABebbgZSr
13Please respect copyright.PENANAD22XBr7m4n
就在兩人已經衝到魔王面前時,說時遲那時快,青峰跟黃瀨突然膝蓋一軟,還來不及反應過來,兩人居然就在在赤司面前跪了下來! 13Please respect copyright.PENANAocMQPPJZC5
13Please respect copyright.PENANAp0UtwtF0oG
Ankle Break! 13Please respect copyright.PENANA8U3dYChFge
13Please respect copyright.PENANAg1HMzW6OhJ
「喔呀、這麼迫不及待的表現對我的臣服嗎?」魔王大人優雅地勾起唇角,怎麼看都覺得那表情帶著相當的不懷好意,「既然如此,那我就勉為其難地接受你們成為我的下屬吧。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAuSdvNxx8Ok
而因為Ankle Break猛然失去身體重心的青峰與黃瀨到現在膝蓋還在隱隱作痛中,明明是赤司隨意竄改劇情可是兩人確是有苦說不出。13Please respect copyright.PENANAF91yWUOI1O
13Please respect copyright.PENANAKR6R9AKL2n
(「媽的赤司也太賤了吧!」)13Please respect copyright.PENANAM7OaLjQb3W
(「嗚嗚嗚小赤司明明劇本不是這樣的……」)13Please respect copyright.PENANAiLtfcFaq5g
13Please respect copyright.PENANA97Ff09O0qj
像是聽到了青峰與黃瀨內心的不甘願,赤司發出了一聲極輕的嗤笑。13Please respect copyright.PENANA85n4JHzGDh
13Please respect copyright.PENANAGEjs12xoXd
(「我改變主意了,不行嗎?」)13Please respect copyright.PENANANiY9ZDPx7U
13Please respect copyright.PENANAaAh8ECLkc5
面對台上突如其來的脫軌演出,綠間不愧身為副主將之名,冷靜沉著的模樣就好像這才是他們排練過多次的劇情。13Please respect copyright.PENANALBMIADwUsz
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綠髮的嚴肅少年抬起纏滿繃帶的手指推了推眼鏡,用著毫無動搖且冷靜無比的嗓音唸出了作為旁白的最後一段台詞。13Please respect copyright.PENANABy0Uonp7CP
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『魔王成功的收服了勇者與王子做為自己的手下,同時也順利地抱得美人歸,真是可喜可賀的完美結局。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAcTVTP8lQfr
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帷幕拉上,完滿落幕!13Please respect copyright.PENANAkrLIVBo8km
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「哪裡可喜可賀啊?!」摔劇本。13Please respect copyright.PENANAGuIlHkegfH
「小赤司哪有人這樣的嗚嗚嗚……」淚流滿面。13Please respect copyright.PENANAxWRN72QRtJ
「命運是不會選擇違逆天命的人的。」推眼鏡。13Please respect copyright.PENANAudRkUeaHkh
「小赤犯規偷跑。」嚼嚼嚼。13Please respect copyright.PENANAHmkfwUfeGO
「哲君──!!!QAQQQQQ」撲抱。13Please respect copyright.PENANAS2LUHsGMBF
13Please respect copyright.PENANAr0TVpZ8UrY
面對一群不是在發洩怨氣就是淚眼汪汪望著自己的隊友們,黑子哲也忍不住回過頭去看在自己背後依然氣定神閒談笑風生的隊長大人。13Please respect copyright.PENANAYXCTc3tjdz
13Please respect copyright.PENANAslwI96z2Un
「赤司君,這樣……」沒問題嗎?13Please respect copyright.PENANAbrcKYoxayk
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赤司僅僅只是給了他一個意味不明的眼神,不過嘴角挑起的弧度有著怎樣也無法掩飾的得意。 13Please respect copyright.PENANAxFByPBdQ8K
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「哲也,我的決定是……?」13Please respect copyright.PENANABQmQYG5cRg
「……無可違抗的。」13Please respect copyright.PENANA62SbgEzeQp
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Fin.
ns 15.158.61.6da2 13Please respect copyright.PENANAVkZDB7KBtH
由於已經做了不少次彩排,因此大家很快就進入狀況了,每個人有條不紊地換上戲服、上妝,已經換裝完畢的人則是開始專心地背台詞,以求等等上台不要忘詞。13Please respect copyright.PENANAESr9YRESG4
雖然這次籃球部是因為雖小才被抽到,但是依照赤司要求完美的個性,等等要是誰上台忘詞導致這齣戲有了瑕疵的話……13Please respect copyright.PENANAPG355KeQgY
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會死的!!!!13Please respect copyright.PENANAaoBoxPcqE3
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──後臺所有人不約而同地想到了同一句話。13Please respect copyright.PENANApOry6U7OQi
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※13Please respect copyright.PENANAQPnsIuyIvi
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很快地就到了開演的時間,伴隨著開演前的鈴響,紅色的帷幕往兩旁拉開,台下還在鼓譟的觀眾們也安靜了下來。13Please respect copyright.PENANAW9h9b36Ouc
『從前從前,有一個很小的國家,這個國家因為太小也太偏僻了,所以一直都沒有遭到其他國家的侵略,過著相當封閉而自給自足的生活。』13Please respect copyright.PENANArrXwXsSrPn
13Please respect copyright.PENANAj5hvACaM31
擔任旁白的是綠間,當初在分配角色跟工作的時候,不知道是誰說了一句綠間的聲音很低沉一定很適合唸床邊故事,所以赤司就讓他去當旁白了,反正綠間打死也不想上台,旁白半幕後的性質倒是很合他。13Please respect copyright.PENANAYBHGdkXiHF
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『然而最特別的地方是……這個國家是由兩位美麗的公主來統治的。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAflhAqo5tEn
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隨著綠間低沉的聲線,兩個穿著華麗貴氣的女孩款款走上了舞台,其中一位是桃井五月,連續兩年票選為男生心目中完美女神的著名籃球部經理人,但另一位有著水藍長髮,面容清秀的「女孩」……毫無疑問,絕對是黑子哲也本人。13Please respect copyright.PENANAq6KWHMwFx0
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「哎呀、藍色頭髮的那個是誰啊?也是籃球部的經理嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAriTvR89saR
「好可愛喔,雖然沒有桃井同學那麼漂亮,可是氣質好好呢~」13Please respect copyright.PENANAXgZvtTURjU
13Please respect copyright.PENANAWCUcYILfnF
顯然台下的學生也對黑子的女生扮相非常驚艷,只不過台上的黑子眼神卻又更死了幾分,好在舞台光打得夠強,沒有人注意到小公主的表情幾乎可以稱得上是神經壞死狀態。13Please respect copyright.PENANATmJ9BYn74b
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瞥了一眼在舞台兩側待命的隊友明顯在憋笑的舉動,黑子的心情又更惡劣了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAP3B6zgAnMz
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『兩位公主是一對姐妹,姐妹彼此相依為命,將國家治理得非常富庶。王國的人民都非常愛戴公主們,身為姐姐的大公主對於小公主百般疼愛,也希望妹妹能嫁給心愛的人過著幸福快樂的生活……』13Please respect copyright.PENANA3JAHvth3aa
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大公主拉著小公主的手來到舞台中間,圍著桌子坐了下來。大公主將妹妹的手緊緊握著,非常關切地看著小公主。(桃井內心的os:摸到哲君的手了!好希望可以握久一點……!)13Please respect copyright.PENANAXX8T4nTZwk
13Please respect copyright.PENANAFfL1nBNqsO
「妹妹,父王跟母后過世前交代我要好好照顧妳,現在妳也長大了,差不多是時候結婚了……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAMm11IFgnUO
「姐姐,我不想嫁人。」小公主搖搖頭。13Please respect copyright.PENANA5m6OEI9thz
「那怎麼行,女孩子總是要嫁人的呀!上次那個鄰國的王子……長什麼樣子有點忘了……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAAwxCCKMluT
「一頭金髮看起來很自戀的那位?」善良的小公主提醒了自家姐姐。13Please respect copyright.PENANAHH9Zmu2j0I
「啊對!那個傢伙對妳不是還蠻有意思的?每天都站在妳的窗戶前唱情歌,長得也還算順眼……小妹妳喜歡他嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAIhIB1ODs4I
「王子是個好人,不過太煩了。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAGJjCLaSSjk
「也是,那前一陣子殺掉九頭惡龍的勇者呢?雖然黑了點不過應該還可以忍受,小妹妳喜歡這種的?」13Please respect copyright.PENANASCGvROnA5W
「姐姐妳忘了我以前在學院唸書的時候可是曾經把勇者大人的內褲掛在行政塔的最頂端喔?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAET2VAZkRVe
「呃,好像是有這麼一回事……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAY4LAVJq8wW
13Please respect copyright.PENANANoHXcQcws2
『大公主終於想起自家的妹妹會到這麼大還嫁不出去,最重要的原因就是在於小公主實在太可怕了,每一個曾經追求過小公主的男性都慘遭打擊,以至於留下了終生的創傷……』13Please respect copyright.PENANAkE0d1bOrBV
13Please respect copyright.PENANAkOhtGSl5Y3
綠間一絲不苟的唸著劇本上的台詞,明明是很搞笑的內容卻被唸的正經八百,台下的觀眾笑得更大聲了,顯然這種惡搞式的劇情對他們來說更有趣。13Please respect copyright.PENANAOxcpqPzQJi
13Please respect copyright.PENANAVRkhLq0MUd
「唉,怎麼辦呢……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAd7EpXHJVKZ
「既然這樣的話,不如就給了我吧。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAL0RDcgrDzx
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突然之間憑空響起了一個男人的聲音,舞台突然暗了下來,燈光開始瘋狂地一閃一滅著,恐怖詭異的背景音樂響起,超大電風扇吹得舞台上沒有被固定的東西都在狂飛。13Please respect copyright.PENANA5sNieVipbb
等到燈光終於穩定下來時,舞台上卻已經沒有小公主的身影了!13Please respect copyright.PENANAM0ljwos9fR
13Please respect copyright.PENANA5yPuuiAYUW
「你是誰?把我妹妹還給我!」13Please respect copyright.PENANARrqmGwBhez
「我當然是魔王,愚蠢的女人,小公主我就帶走了,有本事的話就派勇者來擊敗我吧!」13Please respect copyright.PENANARqmmBA6VRX
「妹妹!妹妹!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAvo9m5jubZh
13Please respect copyright.PENANAYdc3Z3UBZD
大公主跪倒在地上悲傷地喊叫著,此刻紅色簾幕緩緩拉上了,第一幕到這裡結束。13Please respect copyright.PENANA6EVn3REK82
觀眾們小聲地討論著劇情,過了沒多久,簾幕又再一次拉開了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAR3Rmke4xXq
13Please respect copyright.PENANAwVkIJbVO3l
第二幕的場景是森林,舞台中間沒有人,綠間的聲音再度響起。13Please respect copyright.PENANAc9TdTImgwg
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『小公主被魔王抓走之後,傷心欲絕的大公主發出了懸賞公告,誰能救回小公主,她就將心愛的妹妹嫁給那個人,並附送黃金萬斤當作嫁妝。勇者和鄰國的王子一聽到這個消息都各自整裝行囊準備去討伐魔王了。』13Please respect copyright.PENANA5v5o2c3c8J
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這時從舞台右側走出一個穿著華麗的金髮少年,當他一出場,台下的女孩子紛紛激動地尖叫了起來,大概都是些「涼太大人我們愛你」之類的話。13Please respect copyright.PENANATtcnJarF3D
金髮的少年聽到女孩們的尖叫也笑著和台下揮手,引起一片更大聲的抽氣與尖叫。13Please respect copyright.PENANAbMwBhRdb2t
13Please respect copyright.PENANAGx6psQusJA
跟在王子後面的紫髮隨從在沒人看的到地方翻了翻白眼,毫不掩飾眼中的鄙視。13Please respect copyright.PENANAE60v5fSXUB
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──可以再愛現一點嘛!13Please respect copyright.PENANANvjcS1KHh6
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這時候從舞台左側走出一個穿著勇者裝束的黑皮膚(真的很黑!)少年,勇者狠狠地瞪著王子,看起來似乎來意不善。13Please respect copyright.PENANAACwutwGvQI
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「喂,白癡王子,你該不會也是要去救小公主的吧?」13Please respect copyright.PENANA21CnY5pilU
「哼哼那還用說,只要我這次救出了小公主,她一定會感動到自願嫁給我的……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAosSaPpwErI
「小白臉,你以為憑你的三腳貓身手能打敗魔王嗎?我看你連魔王城堡前的庭院都走不到!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAkYbUc63stF
「沒關係我可是有手下的!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAuqoKDNoMYu
「你以為小公主會喜歡你嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAY0IhlO5fQp
「至少我不像某人曾經被小公主整到臉都丟光了。」13Please respect copyright.PENANA7FSLF5z7wL
「你這傢伙……找死嗎?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAdPuHLq6B8X
13Please respect copyright.PENANAvNDifYOums
兩個人在台上齜牙咧嘴地打起架來了,雖然是演戲的必要橋段,不過多多少少還是有公報私仇的意味在裡頭,台下還不時可以聽到涼太大人加油的支持聲,然後帷幕拉上,第二幕到這裡結束。13Please respect copyright.PENANAb6EAgcoSUN
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第三幕沒有讓觀眾等太久,帷幕便拉開了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAVrw5ama7hZ
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『勇者與王子在路上一見如故,於是決定結伴而行一起去討伐魔王,並約定好要公平競爭。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAHcSgvzkzYM
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「可惡,我的馬怎麼跑不動了?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAWApmtDLH3w
「該死!誰在我的晚餐裡下瀉藥──」13Please respect copyright.PENANAKFyXivuMw8
「小白臉我告訴你我跟小公主是青梅竹馬長大的,她絕對會選我不選你的!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAQUkSYUiXIw
「死黑皮我告訴你小公主跟我一定是兩情相悅的,每次我在她宮殿前唱歌她都用含情脈脈的眼光看著我哦!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAIuNdbfjhi3
13Please respect copyright.PENANAQC5XSotJ4W
「……兩個白癡。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAgqSIicFGwi
王子的高大隨從不屑地瞥了兩個蠢蛋一眼,哼哼地表示鄙視。13Please respect copyright.PENANAKFpzaDqOqS
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『在經歷過千辛萬苦之後,王子與勇者終於來到魔王的城堡了,兩人一路上互相扶持,共同打倒了魔王派出來的各種魔物……』13Please respect copyright.PENANALgSeKkm84G
13Please respect copyright.PENANAUTCjH4eSbv
「白癡王子閃邊啦你擋到我的路了!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAN5LEFG7jax
「吵死了你以為剛剛的魔物是誰打倒的啊?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANA0zi5OP9f3W
「要不是我補上那一擊你以為你還能在這裡唱秋?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANA2oJB47Cvm9
「@#$%^&*!#%$%……」13Please respect copyright.PENANAfp6X81xpiM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAtxagUFfA1X
『最後,他們終於好不容易來到魔王面前了,而被抓走的小公主也在,王子與勇者看到這一幕都非常憤怒。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAOervRQ9hae
「混帳啊啊啊把你的手從那個公主的腰上拿走啊啊啊──!!!」勇者悲憤莫名的怒吼道。13Please respect copyright.PENANAWkngTYqux7
「嗚啊啊啊小公主的腰連我都沒有摸過你怎麼可以@#$%^&*……」哭到泣不成聲的王子。13Please respect copyright.PENANAQwLn3IyA7V
13Please respect copyright.PENANA5g3oT1wQkp
現身在兩人面前的是赤髮的俊美魔王,魔王一手攬著小公主的纖腰,臉上噙著高深莫測的微笑,風姿颯爽地登場了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAMihy0LTkqM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAA9ULB8idCz
「喔呀、大公主派出來的就是這種程度的貨色嗎?」13Please respect copyright.PENANAMZq2aOXugn
魔王嘴角挑起,用頗為失禮的語氣詢問被他摟在懷裡的小公主(完完全全的惡意啊)。13Please respect copyright.PENANAbgRKlPzxFM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAHFgWyRawOo
小公主看起來似乎很僵硬,最詭異的還是那張自始至終都沒有過變化的平板表情。13Please respect copyright.PENANAqJtwqCbCix
13Please respect copyright.PENANAQCFMB01Stt
「可惡的魔王快放開我,鄰國的王子殿下跟英勇的勇者大人啊,快來救我吧!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAHe0w8esU0q
13Please respect copyright.PENANAupASD7Lzo9
老老實實待在魔王懷裡的小公主用著異常平淡的語氣唸出台詞,冷靜到零點以下的語氣一時之間讓台上的氣氛似乎有種瞬間下降兩三度的錯覺。13Please respect copyright.PENANA41oJsGtzqp
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「……」13Please respect copyright.PENANADBrTXnqTcp
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(「哲也,叫得太假了。」)13Please respect copyright.PENANA48oKX2L32n
(「啊,抱歉,我會嘗試改善的,不過對於這樣歇斯底里的台詞我實在很難苟同。」)13Please respect copyright.PENANAEPaiPeYfRy
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現場一陣冷場之後,王子跟勇者總算繼續唸出下面的台詞了。13Please respect copyright.PENANAomDY63QYfo
13Please respect copyright.PENANA1fACH7hmtI
「該、該死的魔王!今天我就要代替公義與真理消滅你!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAloa43OjFC7
「沒錯!還不快點放開小公主!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAAoSXsMihMM
13Please respect copyright.PENANAokUxqnE7u8
王子與勇者紛紛抽出配戴的寶劍準備殺過去了,到了這裡接下來就是王子與勇者成功打倒魔王,並且順利救出公主的皆大歡喜結局,而在救出公主之後難免會有一些摟摟抱抱牽牽小手啦……之類的必要接觸(咦)。13Please respect copyright.PENANAOFD5qm7UKx
然而、然而,雖然總是被視為心思深沉高高在上在籃球部內說東沒人敢往西的絕對帝王,赤司征十郎有些時候在某種程度上來說卻是意外的任性和……佔有慾強烈。13Please respect copyright.PENANAfWmirF5IJH
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面對那兩個明顯一臉就是「快點把這裡的情節交代完救出公主之後就可以跟哲/小黑子這樣又那樣」的傢伙,赤司突然覺得心裡有一點點莫名的不爽,就像晚餐準備要吃湯豆腐結果超市店員卻一臉歉意地說豆腐缺貨的感覺。13Please respect copyright.PENANAb4UtVA11rs
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魔王大人唇角忽然勾起一抹讓人心驚膽戰的笑容,看到那樣的笑而本能感到一陣寒顫兩人不知為何突然有了不好的預感,但是已經來不及停下來了──13Please respect copyright.PENANAYYzZpBmoDa
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「呃?!」13Please respect copyright.PENANABjXDcOtca9
「呀啊!」13Please respect copyright.PENANAiABebbgZSr
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就在兩人已經衝到魔王面前時,說時遲那時快,青峰跟黃瀨突然膝蓋一軟,還來不及反應過來,兩人居然就在在赤司面前跪了下來! 13Please respect copyright.PENANAocMQPPJZC5
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Ankle Break! 13Please respect copyright.PENANA8U3dYChFge
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「喔呀、這麼迫不及待的表現對我的臣服嗎?」魔王大人優雅地勾起唇角,怎麼看都覺得那表情帶著相當的不懷好意,「既然如此,那我就勉為其難地接受你們成為我的下屬吧。」13Please respect copyright.PENANAuSdvNxx8Ok
而因為Ankle Break猛然失去身體重心的青峰與黃瀨到現在膝蓋還在隱隱作痛中,明明是赤司隨意竄改劇情可是兩人確是有苦說不出。13Please respect copyright.PENANAF91yWUOI1O
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(「媽的赤司也太賤了吧!」)13Please respect copyright.PENANAM7OaLjQb3W
(「嗚嗚嗚小赤司明明劇本不是這樣的……」)13Please respect copyright.PENANAiLtfcFaq5g
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像是聽到了青峰與黃瀨內心的不甘願,赤司發出了一聲極輕的嗤笑。13Please respect copyright.PENANA85n4JHzGDh
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(「我改變主意了,不行嗎?」)13Please respect copyright.PENANANiY9ZDPx7U
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面對台上突如其來的脫軌演出,綠間不愧身為副主將之名,冷靜沉著的模樣就好像這才是他們排練過多次的劇情。13Please respect copyright.PENANALBMIADwUsz
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綠髮的嚴肅少年抬起纏滿繃帶的手指推了推眼鏡,用著毫無動搖且冷靜無比的嗓音唸出了作為旁白的最後一段台詞。13Please respect copyright.PENANABy0Uonp7CP
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『魔王成功的收服了勇者與王子做為自己的手下,同時也順利地抱得美人歸,真是可喜可賀的完美結局。』13Please respect copyright.PENANAcTVTP8lQfr
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帷幕拉上,完滿落幕!13Please respect copyright.PENANAkrLIVBo8km
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「哪裡可喜可賀啊?!」摔劇本。13Please respect copyright.PENANAGuIlHkegfH
「小赤司哪有人這樣的嗚嗚嗚……」淚流滿面。13Please respect copyright.PENANAxWRN72QRtJ
「命運是不會選擇違逆天命的人的。」推眼鏡。13Please respect copyright.PENANAudRkUeaHkh
「小赤犯規偷跑。」嚼嚼嚼。13Please respect copyright.PENANAHmkfwUfeGO
「哲君──!!!QAQQQQQ」撲抱。13Please respect copyright.PENANAS2LUHsGMBF
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面對一群不是在發洩怨氣就是淚眼汪汪望著自己的隊友們,黑子哲也忍不住回過頭去看在自己背後依然氣定神閒談笑風生的隊長大人。13Please respect copyright.PENANAYXCTc3tjdz
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「赤司君,這樣……」沒問題嗎?13Please respect copyright.PENANAbrcKYoxayk
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赤司僅僅只是給了他一個意味不明的眼神,不過嘴角挑起的弧度有著怎樣也無法掩飾的得意。 13Please respect copyright.PENANAxFByPBdQ8K
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「哲也,我的決定是……?」13Please respect copyright.PENANABQmQYG5cRg
「……無可違抗的。」13Please respect copyright.PENANA62SbgEzeQp
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Fin.