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It was a night when it rained non-stop. It rains softly and continuously, and it didn't look like it was going to end. K's long black hair has grown longer, and when she asked me what she looked different about, I squinted for a while. For a moment, I didn't even know what had changed in her.
"My hair!" she said. "My hair has grown longer, haven't you noticed?"
It's about a ten-minute drive from her home to the gas station she wants to go to. She asked me to accompany her to go refuel, so I got into her car. It’s been a long time since I’ve been in her passenger seat. Think about it, when was the last time she took me? It was probably last year? Anyway, it was long, long time ago.
The puppy doll I gave her was still lying lazily on the seat. In the backpack of her wombat toy, there are still good-luck coin that I secretly put in. On a warm rainy night, the streetlights and reflections rendered everything so beautiful. That kind of scenery seems to be a kind of emotion, changing gently and elusively, burying some secrets silently. Although, the secrets have long been expired.
K hasn't changed. After another breakup, the cheerful girl finally stood up again. Maybe she was actually feeling very sad. But she wouldn't let me know. She is too used to disguising herself and loves to pretend. So, the way I see her has never changed, and she doesn’t want me to understand her too well.
"Do you still remember that I asked you, is there anything in this world that will never change?" She said while looking at the road ahead.
I think I know what she's trying to say. "Friendship." 'I said. I knew what she meant.
"Yeah." She turned her head to look at me for a moment, then moved her eyes back to the wet world in front of her. "I used to think it was love, but now I know it’s not."
I laughed. Why is she so naive? "It's like this one moment, and I don't know what will happen the next moment."
"Yes, friends are best." she said seriously.
It's not that friendship remains unchanged, it's just that no one cares whether it has changed. Our eyes have been focused on other things for too long, and I have become a dispensable role to K, or K to me. We also talked on the phone countless night when we couldn't sleep, and we also walked in the rain when we can’t bear to see each other go. At that time, were we really just friends to each other? I no longer want to ask, because I actually know and understand that it is in the past.
"Shin, if we are still single when we are thirty, can you marry me?"
"Uh?"
"I mean, if."
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I mean...if. Because K won’t be alone for too long. When she wakes up the next day, she will forget that it rained during the night, and she will forget that I was in her car yesterday. She will clean up everything, face it all over again, and before she has time to think about the past, ignite another relationship. In K's world, she cannot live without someone who loves her.
And I... in her life, I'm just a friend she thinks of occasionally.
A friend who stupid enough to agree to marry her.
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