The longer he walked, the more worried he got.
All around him, people chatted and laughed, but he couldn’t help feeling that he was being watched. With as casual an air as he could manage, he tried to look around. No one appeared to be paying him any attention. Stall owners hawked products, and dragons and non-dragons alike shopped.
After asking around, he sighed in frustration.
“Ok, one exit for exactly this reason. Smart, but that has to be a fire hazard.” He thought to himself as he pushed past a cyclops buying a conical wizard hat. “He can’t stay there all day, I guess. Though neither can I.”
His cheek ached, and he realized he’d been biting into it. After unclenching his jaw, he shuffled off to the side in between two stalls and did his best to calm down. Once he was away from the bustle, he took a deep breath and thought about his options.
“I can’t fight my way past him, and sneaking won’t work. A distraction, maybe? All I have to do is touch the pedestal, and I’m free. The question is how to pull that off.”
As he thought, he examined his inventory. Weapons and armor came to mind, but he dismissed them. The last thing he wanted to do was look as if he was getting ready to fight. If Security wasn’t called on him, one of the other stall owners might try to be brave.
He needed something more subtle. Two items jumped out at him at that thought.
“Now, do I have access to it, or do I need to trade it back and forth?”
To test that, he pulled something benign out of his inventory. The Crocodile meat appeared in his hand, warm and slightly heavy. Around him, he got a few surprised looks, but no one stopped to ask questions.
Still, he put it away as he wiped his hand on his pants leg. Though it made him wonder how they stopped people from using weapons here. With a shrug, he attempted to pull one out but found he couldn’t.
“Well, that answers that. It makes sense. The last thing upper management would want is for this place to turn into a war zone. Then again, they have security who could get to anyone instantly, so why should it matter?”
Arthur paused at that thought before jumping to another.
“Last time he teleported exactly to me. Why didn’t he do that again? Unless he can’t because I’m not technically causing a problem? Is it a system that picks us up? Dammit, Gastho, you would have been really useful right now.”
With a shake of his head, he looked around. He needed a stall that would cause a stink if something happened to it. When he found nothing in his vicinity, he walked back the way he’d come.
If his plan worked, he’d want to be close enough to the doors to move with the panicked mass.
Clothing stores, smithies, art studios, and one stall selling plastic flowers came and went. He nodded to them as he continued to amble towards the door. He occasionally purchased a trinket or two. Not anything fancy, simply enough so that no one thought it was strange when it got close to the stalls.
He worried for a minute that he’d need to do another loop when he spotted it. A girl with two heads, each with a single eye, was manning a store that sold all kinds of small animals. From rabbits to strange thirteen-legged insects that climbed over each other, all seemed to hate being caged.
Arthur moved over and nodded as he tried his best not to stare into either eye for too long. One green and one blue, they blinked one after the other in sequence. For a moment, she didn’t speak. He was about to ask something when one rabbit smacked itself against the cage and hissed.
Red eyes stared up at him, and their expression was one of utter hatred. This animal wanted to burn the world down, and it didn’t care if it died too. Rage personified in a brown-coated rabbit.
The girl giggled when he jumped.
“What’s the issue, mister? Never seen a Raging Hare before?” Both heads spoke as one, their voices harmonizing together. “You want one?”
“Umm... what is it? Why are you selling it?”
“I told you, mister, it’s a Raging Hare. They’re a... second-level pest, on my world? Great for hunting smaller vermin or being a general nuisance. If you stick it in a basement, it’ll kill everything inside that it can. The only issue is that you have to get it out again. But that’s why you hire me.”
Arthur nodded along. “So you sell a solution that becomes a problem they need to pay you again to fix?”
“Nah, mister. That would be wrong. Any good low-level adventuring party could kill one easily.” One of her heads gave a sinister grin, while the other showed an angelic expression. “Of course, I know about a team who charges far less than guild rates. But that’s hardly my fault, is it?”
He couldn’t help it, and he laughed. “Fair enough. You seem to have plenty of different types. Any that are fast and strong?”
“A couple, mister. Why? What are you hunting?”
His grin matched her sinister one, and he leaned down. “I’m an old friend of the security officer up there. I wanted to play a practical joke. You wouldn’t mind helping me out?”
That got a laugh from one head and a vicious grin from the other as she clapped her hands together.
“I can help you. Though I want a trade network in exchange. My name is Jessib. Double Sight Pest Control.”
Arthur reached out and took her hand. “Arthur. Apocalypse Assortments. You have a deal; I’m sure I can find some use for these.”
You can use them for all kinds of things,” Jessib said once he’d accepted the network. “For example, some are good for eating, and others are great distractions. Take a look at this little guy.”
With one hand, she fished out a hare, but its legs were too long on its hairless frame. It let out a strange squeak, like a chew toy, until she petted it. “This is a Lock Hare. Cute ain’t he?”
Arthur shook his head. “That thing is terrifying.”
“Sure is, Mister. Smart too; you whisper a target, and they’ll go right for it. Great hunting beasts, but not very strong.”
“How much?”
“Thirty gold.”
“Done.”
With the creature’s cage in hand, he nodded to Jessib. “See you around.”
“Good hunting, Arthur. Don’t be a stranger.”
With that, he started back toward the entrance, his new creature squeaking at his side.
***
Arthur felt bad about what he was doing to the creature, but he needed this to work.
He moved to a store selling sewing supplies and bought enough string to tie the jar of acid to the creature. After which, he found a dark spot and stuck some of the moss to it. The experimental moss wrapped around the creature, making it look infected.
To his surprise, the creature didn’t appear to show any signs of discomfort from the moss. It scratched at it but otherwise ignored the new growth. Once he’d set it up, he whispered the name of its target.
Immediately, it vibrated, but he didn’t let it go. He waited until a large group moved past, and then he released it. It landed on the ground, moss glowing, before it jumped directly onto the shoulder of a passerby.
The man screamed, doing his best to flick it off, but it was already gone. It jumped onto the top of a stall and started running.
“Monster!” Someone in the crowd screamed.
Panic ensued.
He saw a jet of fire roar into the air as a dragon tried to scorch the thing. Embers fell to the ground, with a few landing in a dress shop. A sleeve caught fire, and the proprietor started shrieking in rage.
With effort, Arthur forced himself into the crowd, doing his best to move with them as they stampeded toward the exits. While he couldn’t see the creature anymore, he could see the chaos. Stall owners were flinging spells and tossing merchandise. Small fights had started.
He ducked a thrown cooking pot that cracked his neighbor in the face. The smell of chemicals and machine oil filled the air, and I heard a mighty crash. Screams surrounded him as the room rapidly heated due to all the dragons letting out bursts of fire.
Security officers started to teleport inside, their riot gear doing little against the sheer number of bodies crashing into them. As he watched, one of them ended up being knocked down and stepped on.
“Infection! Plague! Monsters! Free for all!” Multiple voices filled the air, some as warnings and others as battle cries.
Nearby, he saw a dwarf with a pink glitter-covered mace yelling obscenities in a squeaky voice. They hit a cybernetic cat into the air, who hissed and spit before it fired a beanbag rocket into their face.
Arthur stopped worrying about getting to the entrance and worried more about not getting trampled.
Bodies pressed all around him, and the security didn’t appear equipped to provide help. They were struggling as much as anyone else. Arthur felt bad when he caught sight of destroyed stalls and wrecked products. He’d expected a bit of a mess, not this level of chaos.
When he finally made his way to the entrance, he saw the Lock Hare dissolving at Officer Zerreon’s feet. The dragon was no longer holding his stick and was now simply pushing people back from the pedestal.
“Wait. Everyone, stop! The creature is dead!”
No one listened, and they simply pushed harder. Arthur ducked a swinging fist and continued staying low as spells flew overhead. With effort, he got behind a lumbering ogre, using the bigger creature’s frame as a living shield.
“Stop right there, idiot. Take a step back!”
Arthur winced as he heard Officer Zerreon’s voice directly ahead, and the ogre stopped. He watched as his shield stopped and he heard a snarl.
“Don’t talk to me, rent-a-cop!”
“How dare you—” The ogre lashing out, cut Officer Zerreon off.
Without waiting to see how the dragon would react, Arthur ducked around the scuffle and ran toward the pedestal. There wasn’t even a prompt when he touched it; he simply woke up.
His eyes snapped open, and he could feel the grin on his face.
“Well,” he thought as he got up. “Not how I planned to spend my evening. Let’s see if Pydes can tell me anything about the damage. But first, a change of clothes, I think.”
***
The suit fit as though someone had tailored it directly for him.
He did his best to use the reflection on the computer screen and smiled at the result. Even his cap somehow didn’t look out of place with his new look. Once that was done, he straightened his back and walked out onto the shop floor, past a sleeping Leo and Theobold.
Augustus was guarding the door, with Nyssa in her spot by the window once more painting Splotch. The small dragon hung upside down from one of the roots that covered the ceiling.
“How’s business, Nyssa?”
She looked at him, mouth open, to let out a witty retort, but stopped. Her eyes widened, and even Splotch let out a confused squeak as they turned to look at him.
“Arthur?”
“Hey. Do you like the new suit?”
“Yeah, it looks great. Fantastic.” Her eyes narrowed. “How much did it cost?”
Arthur grinned. “One hundred and fifty gold. Worth every penny.”
From his spot by the door, Augustus squeaked and nodded. Nyssa looked less amused.
“And you thought this was a good idea because?”
“Simple.” He moved to rest against the counter. “If I’m a manager, I need to dress like one. I run this place, and people are asking me to make decisions. People have said forever, dress for success. It’s advice I want to follow. Besides, we have enough money. Speaking of which.”
The sound of a cash register filled the store, and balls of light flew around the room. A notification flashed up, and he winced as the goddess took her cut once the payments were done. He was down to next to nothing.
After his spending spree in the mall, he now sat with approximately seventy-three coins in the till. Not even enough to pay out his quests. He tapped his fingers against the counter and tried to think about the best way to deal with this.
“You look worried.” Nyssa sounded concerned as she walked over to him, coins jangling in their bag.
Arthur did his best to smile. “I may have overspent a little.”
“How much is a little?”
“I can’t pay out the quests tonight without making sales.”
“Arthur!”
“I messed up,” He said as he held his hands up. “Look. I need to talk to Pydes, anyway. Maybe he’ll be able to help.”
As soon as the words came out of his mouth, he heard a thump from outside. A single turn showed Pydes standing outside with a glare on his face. The dragon didn’t look nearly as angry as the last time, but that didn’t stop him from shivering.
Before he could say anything else, Pydes spoke, his words covered with an icy anger.
“What did you do to the mall?”197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZUgJFoDRS
