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現在是什麼情況?19Please respect copyright.PENANAuolUgUsuST
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坐在咖啡廳內,眼神游移戶外那片摻雜的雪與水反射著光晶瑩的景色,冬日難得的放晴日,儘管空氣中還是透著一股寒意,卻仍舊讓一項喜歡陽光加拿大感到喜悅而綻靨。19Please respect copyright.PENANAEae4S5dnfc
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凝望著那片和諧的景色半晌,加拿大大約是滿足了,便斂眸端起擺置於身前桌几上的紅茶托盤,拿進嘴邊輕輕吹著冒著熱氣的飲品幾秒使不致燙嘴後,他就著杯沿緩緩地將溢滿茶葉香味地褐色液體吞入喉中,讓四肢百骸充滿了暖和的液體,並藉以消抵沉默氣氛的緊張。19Please respect copyright.PENANAbWyM3IFYVv
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是的,緊張。19Please respect copyright.PENANAsUw9CIpErS
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儘管他不曉得為甚麼會發展到這地步,關於為甚麼他會在這裡和素未謀面的青年面對面坐著喝茶。19Please respect copyright.PENANAIndLEzCZDi
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偷著喝茶的空檔,他悄悄覷向對面似乎無聊地而拿起咖啡棒攪著飲品的青年,青年一手托頰地瞥向左方那片街景,沉沉黑色地瞳眸看不出思緒什麼,也許什麼也沒有想吧,只是目眙著青年漠然的五官卻讓加拿大心頭糾緊地傳來陣陣痛楚同時腦際一瞬間閃過了什麼畫面,當那些恍如吉光片羽地影像掠過,他詫異地眨眼,並張口噫了一聲,可是稍後試圖再去回索什麼的時候,先前一閃而逝的畫面卻始終未曾再顯現。 19Please respect copyright.PENANAjhhyQIBzJN
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「呃、那個,請問……您如何稱呼?」嘗試打破僵局,加拿大放下托盤,問著眼前眼皮幾乎要黏在一起,頻頻呵欠的青年。19Please respect copyright.PENANAz1lEnlXIfW
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興許是被問句拉回心神,青年慵懶地眼神從景色轉向定定焦住著他臉龐,由於被青年那樣直視而灌注的眼神,讓一向被忽略得很徹底的加拿大感到莫名地害臊,習慣性想抱著從有記憶初始就一直在身邊的寵物以消除那令人坐立難安地注視卻撲空時,他才想到他的寵物似乎從早上就不在,所以他才會在遍尋不著的狀況下離開家裏到街上去尋,也才會碰上很久前的宗主國。19Please respect copyright.PENANAqaj5wC7RZR
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然後,加拿大想起來了,對,就在他被宗主國騷擾的時候,面前的灰白髮青年就忽然出現一把抓住了宗主國的手,眼神冷冽而嚴寒,散發彷彿要將人完全凍死的殺意。嚇的他的宗主國立即停下了他猥瑣的舉止,忙不迭地退身而逃了。那也就是他後來向青年道謝,卻被青年箝制一個拐彎進入了咖啡廳休息的前因了。19Please respect copyright.PENANA8JR4wfooM6
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沉默須臾,青年面無表情地張口開闔,寂靜而無聲。19Please respect copyright.PENANAivwbgW4RaV
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明明無聲卻幾乎像是直接從腦中灌入的嗓音併裂在聽覺中。19Please respect copyright.PENANAF50gtm9NmI
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過於似曾相似了。19Please respect copyright.PENANA6PI6nOZbCY
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盯著那熟悉地令他戰慄的脣形,加拿大眼前一黑,那片黑暗中,有什麼搖曳著溫暖與雪白熟悉的讓人想哭的畫面,自記憶中緩緩褪去遮擋的外殼,模糊的影像伴隨著黑暗散去,那樣熟悉,那樣懷念,卻也那樣令他痛徹心扉的過往畫面此刻像刺在心上的木樁濺起的鮮血硬生生地在眼前擴展,鮮明而強烈。19Please respect copyright.PENANAmA1hMFDMEc
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毫無預警的,眼淚不受控制地沿著頰面滴落。19Please respect copyright.PENANAhvQ2HJ4C7S
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他住在北冥之處,那是個終年白雪靄靄,即便是能夠擁有太陽的季節,也只是感到寒冷的地方。19Please respect copyright.PENANAA6xpQkxhxY
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也許是天寒地凍的緣故,他的世界一直只有他自己,靜冷而死白。19Please respect copyright.PENANALDx0eCj55z
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不過那樣也沒什麼不好。19Please respect copyright.PENANARtumYG3SbQ
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他的性格中並不存在著熱情與浪漫,對於很多事情他也沒有想碰觸的慾望。19Please respect copyright.PENANAajKIWTVBI2
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是繁瑣嘛?是嫌惡嘛?19Please respect copyright.PENANAlxrpndT353
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其實他也理不清,可確實他常常就只是看著,就只是看著,那怕面前的是殘忍血腥的畫面,他也只會非常漠然而淡定地望著,猶如絕情而冷血的生物,看著事件發生、毀壞、最後塵埃落定,然後並不加以阻止。19Please respect copyright.PENANAEweOczihi7
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曾想過這樣性格產生的緣故也許是因為一直都只有自己,但深思又發覺全然不是這麼簡單的原因。19Please respect copyright.PENANAL322KP40xb
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正因為一直用著那樣態度過著日子的緣故,所以在那天從雪地理抱起了孩子的時候,他才忽然迷惘了,忽然迷惘於自己的舉止,忽然迷惘自己為何要將孩子從極冷之處納入自己黑色溫暖的懷抱中。19Please respect copyright.PENANAcPh9UWnhGu
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是因為那個瘦弱的孩子倒臥在進入嚴冬風雪嘶吼的極地邊境像死了般的模樣讓他動了徹隱之心嗎?從撿起孩子那天,他就不斷思索著。19Please respect copyright.PENANAqG9YvLeVJP
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絕對不會是那麼簡單的原因。19Please respect copyright.PENANAbOkwRlCI5c
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可是卻又完全說不出。19Please respect copyright.PENANAy98VT4hmRA
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在還沒被宗主國扶養前,加拿大記得他被一個人照顧過一段時日。那時他纔漸漸具有所謂國家的形體,由於還沒適應這樣酷寒的氣候,剛出生那一刻身體就十分虛弱,甚至最後抵擋不住而倒臥在那片雪地中,任由意識潰散,幾乎就要消失的霎那,那人不帶什麼情緒地拎起他,將他納入黑色卻溫暖像太陽的懷抱,把他從消失的邊緣拉了回來,大抵是安心的緣故或者其他什麼,總之那時他在那人暖呼地懷抱裡放鬆地睡著,也不怕是否一睡之後將與死亡為伍。19Please respect copyright.PENANAJEoRRtyZHx
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再度清醒時已經是在一個白雪鑿成的洞穴,映入的是青年冷然如夜般的眸,他呆然地凝視著坐在他床側的人,接著注意到身上裹著毛茸茸地灰色皮草,他瘦小地掌心摸了摸十分溫暖的被襖,觸感是柔軟的令人喜歡,他瞥首對上青年毫無情緒鴉黑的眼神,加拿大靜靜地望著年,而後對他輕輕微笑了起來。19Please respect copyright.PENANAkaMjykCkyX
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青年面無表情地看著他。19Please respect copyright.PENANAXlgvIeXfoQ
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過了很久以後,他纔伸出手來輕輕拍著他頭。19Please respect copyright.PENANACvPmuiVRre
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他們一起度過了很長一段日子。19Please respect copyright.PENANAcIvAvCXKci
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青年基本上不開口,但奇妙的是那些語言卻會直接從腦中傳輸,而非透過聲音。19Please respect copyright.PENANAp8MlhWeiyu
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那時的他根本不理解那是不正常的,可青年一定發現了吧,所以才會在那一天消失他面前,然後讓宗主國發現他的存在並帶走他。19Please respect copyright.PENANAwdQckdTZFr
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可是當時的自己不明瞭那種不常是扭曲的,只是覺得心好痛,好想哭,甚至會偷偷跑到極地之境,奢想著也許還能再見上一面。19Please respect copyright.PENANA4r1bJJOcxL
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可是無論他等了多長日子,那個曾經在雪地裡抱起他、陪著他的青年身影卻始終未曾出現。19Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9pxV5OnDL
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回過神,攤在面前的是青年遞給他的素色巾帕,似乎用意是要他擦拭一下淚水,加拿大困窘地紅著臉接下青年的好意。只不過是青年給予的感覺似曾相似而已,自己就這麼控制不住眼淚,如果將來真的和那人再逢,那時的自己怎麼辦?假設性的想了想,加拿大忽然笑出聲,大概是惹人疑竇的緣故,一時在咖啡廳內的顧客眼神全因他笑聲而往他望去。19Please respect copyright.PENANAjVCytM8B6c
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真想挖洞埋了自己。19Please respect copyright.PENANAb6JfA6x0vn
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這是加拿大尷尬赤著一張臉跟著青年走出店門口時的唯一的念頭。19Please respect copyright.PENANALGlMYijJcR
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青年在他身前慢慢踱步著,不曉得該不該離開的加拿大繼續追在他後頭。19Please respect copyright.PENANAyWGBcaD6gN
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一路上,他們之間毫無交談。19Please respect copyright.PENANA52KyBuOa76
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信步在青年後頭,加拿大四望著街景,想著空氣裡已經漸漸挾帶著冷意,那麼離下一波的風雪再度侵襲似乎亦不遠了時沒料到會迎面刮風的加拿大畏寒地曀了聲。19Please respect copyright.PENANANMBbctItU0
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幾乎就像一瞬間發生的。19Please respect copyright.PENANAIM1iu21isU
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青年不知何時將一件灰白毛料,剪裁得宜的外衣套在他雙肩,動作熟悉的像是作過了無數次的老練,隱隱和那人重疊了,加拿大一時無法思緒地瞋目。19Please respect copyright.PENANA5k1nFwrsji
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那麼那麼熟悉的像是烙印在靈魂深處的光景。19Please respect copyright.PENANA0Jf01UbcKF
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只要觸及,就會使人想哭的溫柔。19Please respect copyright.PENANAZGbPfd6H1B
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「我叫熊吉。」青年忽然天外飛來一筆。19Please respect copyright.PENANAc30w3G61Nq
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「咦?」沉浸在感傷中的加拿大被這突來的對話拉出,他狀似疑惑地偏首。19Please respect copyright.PENANAdoh88Gd19E
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青年嗓音冷冷的,像嚴冬裡的風雪。19Please respect copyright.PENANALIGOogkY1P
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「你剛才不是問我名字嗎?我的名字是熊吉。」19Please respect copyright.PENANA0i9yvccp00
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原來是回答那個問題啊。19Please respect copyright.PENANAqljZOic2GU
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「原來是熊吉先生,您的名字和我的寵物很像呢。」19Please respect copyright.PENANAjdunLmzw8W
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「是嗎?」19Please respect copyright.PENANAh03gA1ekvL
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「嗯啊,我的寵物叫做熊二郎喔。雖然牠從來都沒有記得我的名字……」19Please respect copyright.PENANAzdkFOvr2yh
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「我記得啊,不就加拿大嗎?」19Please respect copyright.PENANAQ9eOkKA30a
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「對啊,我的名字就叫加拿大……咦?」19Please respect copyright.PENANA6UEP7rlOvo
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接話接的很順的加拿大終於察覺不對勁之處。19Please respect copyright.PENANA3B8BsLbmN2
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「熊吉先生怎麼會知道我的名字?我記得沒跟您說過吧。」19Please respect copyright.PENANAsynV7XTYdx
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「雖然是沒說過,可是剛剛那人口中有說過」19Please respect copyright.PENANA1fNDZORcya
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那人是指原宗主國嗎?加拿大思考一會,他怎麼沒有印象宗主國有喊到他名字?不過既然熊吉先生這麼說了,那也許僅是自己沒留意到吧。19Please respect copyright.PENANAMoRKbSKgr9
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「原來是這樣啊,所以您才會知道我名字嗎?」19Please respect copyright.PENANAjRyULLbNyQ
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「是的。」19Please respect copyright.PENANAMNYbIduZEv
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加拿大聽著青年的回覆,他十分順手地拉起青年的雙手並展露出如陽光炫惑似視野的笑顏來。19Please respect copyright.PENANAroGVJrwJcQ
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「我很高興呢,謝謝您喊了我的名字。」19Please respect copyright.PENANAF2WLc1sdFE
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青年靜靜地凝視著他,然而加拿大確實看見了,青年十分輕微地笑了。19Please respect copyright.PENANAkd0ehRVnRa
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很淡很淡的一個弧度,卻如同他曾經和那人一同見過的極光反射,淡定從容,美麗的難以言喻。19Please respect copyright.PENANAM8Yuxr6Vs5
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假如,時間可以停駐。19Please respect copyright.PENANAMzfoi5aABM
那麼就讓這一秒成為永恆。19Please respect copyright.PENANAzlWIu0dJHl
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「熊二郎,你到底是跑去哪了呢?害我今天找了你好久。」一回到家,排闥而入便見今天一直尋找的寵物坐在廊道上,加拿大有些埋怨地走過去抱起牠隨成長而變大的軀體,然後蹭著牠白色的毛。19Please respect copyright.PENANAgUQndfLHDF
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「誰?」被抱著的白熊問。19Please respect copyright.PENANA0FXta7DerI
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「真是的,我是加拿大啦。」果不其然。加拿大已經習慣成自然的無奈回應,他覺得熊二郎從沒記住他,要不然幾乎是從小就一直在一起的,怎麼還是會頻頻問他是誰呢?19Please respect copyright.PENANAp3GindX5qS
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「以後別亂跑了喔,我會擔心的。」這是真的。19Please respect copyright.PENANAfg7VRxTOMy
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「 。」19Please respect copyright.PENANA6X4PDw32Bz
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「熊二郎你說什麼?」感覺好像聽見自己的寵物講了什麼的加拿大問。19Please respect copyright.PENANAXNSCNcwU6z
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「誰?」19Please respect copyright.PENANAOvYbNMOhPG
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「加拿大啦!」無力低吼著。19Please respect copyright.PENANAyPqB5Cp94w
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「誰?」19Please respect copyright.PENANA7kJE2TVXnn
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「……算了,反正我就是這麼容易被忘記。」決定放棄去糾正的加拿大把牠放在客聽的沙發上,然後進去廚房準備拿幾塊麵包充作晚餐。19Please respect copyright.PENANA3lbiumQkf8
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「對了,熊二郎,我今天遇到一位跟你的名字很像的人喔,他說他叫熊吉。你看,很像吧,而且,」19Please respect copyright.PENANA9NGmMlowXY
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加拿大想起了什麼,露出很溫柔的笑容。19Please respect copyright.PENANAPsx8FrlrDP
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「也很像很久前照顧過我的人呢。」19Please respect copyright.PENANAy6wVASxVkF
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看似絕情,卻溫柔的像冬日偶然投射的日光一樣的,他。19Please respect copyright.PENANAeqxXkjCjAb
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*19Please respect copyright.PENANATZrcnw5uJl
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漫天風雪猶如猛獸一樣地狂暴,加拿大瘦小地身軀橫臥在雪地裡,四肢因為凍僵而無法移動甚至感受到什麼。19Please respect copyright.PENANAG2bs4M6P3q
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他等了好久好久,久到心都死了,可是就算如此,他等的那人卻不曾再出現。他不是個好孩子嗎?他作錯了什麼?為甚麼要拋棄他?為甚麼不再陪在他身邊?有好多好多的疑問,可是卻沒有解答。19Please respect copyright.PENANAOO89dZeLFm
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要怎麼作,那人才會再回到身邊?是否要如初遇那般,那人才會再度出現然後溫柔地抱起他?這樣嗎?這樣嗎?19Please respect copyright.PENANAE70VgkNeZh
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一個小小和他差不多身形的白色物體往他鑽了過來,在風雪蔓延的天氣裡充滿著暖呼呼的體溫。19Please respect copyright.PENANA9mxmpurkq6
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濕漉漉的舌頭舔著他冰寒地臉龐。19Please respect copyright.PENANAY73WpFhVSy
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被這樣一舔,加拿大迷迷糊糊地抱住了這個散發著暖暖、如同青年氣息的生物,然後傻呼呼地笑了起來。19Please respect copyright.PENANAhuefD5ryvu
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「 」。19Please respect copyright.PENANAbeQkN6xFpn
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你回到我身邊了嗎?19Please respect copyright.PENANAvQwO7tn1R3
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實際上這篇文章是系列文章的開端。(....架空?)19Please respect copyright.PENANAeCLQLJATAw
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系列名稱未定,但在我電腦的檔案名稱它叫做「寂靜那端」,後來想了很久,這個挺適合當系列名稱所以決定是它了,題目來源是德語片「走出寂靜」的另一種翻譯。當然還是跟內文的部份概念相關的,寂靜是指青年與幼年加拿大相處的日子是非常安靜的,像雪綿密下著的無聲,靜靜但一直都在那裡。19Please respect copyright.PENANAHw3droiAp3
一開使想寫的是什麼呢?老實說現在已經想不起來了。(笑)但是記得是加拿大在街上偶然邂逅青年,然後相處的故事,模糊的類似像這樣的感覺。但在原初概念中,加拿大在之後會知道熊二郎是青年,而且在原初模型中,英國會出現,而且知道青年就是熊二郎,或者該說他知道青年的真實模樣,也就是說他看見並非是熊形而是人形。但是因為想了幾天的緣故,所以變成目前呈現的這樣了。(笑)19Please respect copyright.PENANAi4rezgpbwY
如果有發現的話,這篇文章本來是會用兩角度去寫的,青年與加拿大的視角。但是後還來覺得一旦寫了不但失了味道,同時也會寫不完。所以有兩個其實是這故事核心的重點場景被我按捺住,所以日後這兩個故事會以單篇形式出現。19Please respect copyright.PENANA8ELqKaJtpQ
當然還有一個從發想初期就未消失的概念,即是加拿大最終會發現青年的真實身份。19Please respect copyright.PENANAJIHAEjomEc
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沉默須臾,青年面無表情地張口開闔,寂靜而無聲。19Please respect copyright.PENANABlguFos6Rj
明明無聲卻幾乎像是直接從腦中灌入的嗓音併裂在聽覺中。19Please respect copyright.PENANAslIXHPXMRp
過於似曾相似了。19Please respect copyright.PENANAbbmZHvwpRu
盯著那熟悉地令他戰慄的脣形,加拿大眼前一黑,那片黑暗中,有什麼搖曳著溫暖與雪白熟悉的讓人想哭的畫面,自記憶中緩緩褪去遮擋的外殼,模糊的影像伴隨著黑暗散去,那樣熟悉,那樣懷念,卻也那樣令他痛徹心扉的過往畫面此刻像刺在心上的木樁濺起的鮮血硬生生地在眼前擴展,鮮明而強烈。19Please respect copyright.PENANA9meYrYVjCj
毫無預警的,眼淚不受控制地沿著頰面滴落。19Please respect copyright.PENANA6ldiVgG2cu
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這裡是要闡述幼時與青年相處時,青年雖不曾開口說話,但那些類似於語言的嗓音卻會直截傳達到腦中,也就是說他們是不用交談的。19Please respect copyright.PENANAqqUpe7aAyv
可是因為曾經那樣溫柔卻被拋棄,所以他看見青年重現初這些緊扣著他回憶的舉止時才會忍不住流淚,因為那樣熟悉那樣痛。19Please respect copyright.PENANA7YMlKi4vqm
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那時的他根本不理解那是不正常的,可青年一定發現了吧,所以才會在那一天消失他面前,然後讓宗主國發現他的存在並帶走他。19Please respect copyright.PENANAvW9PfZSc9m
這個是很想寫的核心場景之一,關於青年為何要拋棄加拿大的緣由,另外這裡的宗主國是指法國。拋棄的原因是因為想讓加拿大有正常成長的空間,畢竟是「熊」的存在,就像個自然的野獸,終究不能教育什麼吧。19Please respect copyright.PENANATloLorHFPw
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總之那時他在那人暖忽地懷抱裡放鬆地睡著,也不怕是否一睡之後將與死亡為伍。19Please respect copyright.PENANAKFKlddYvMD
這是因為睡眠和死亡是兄弟,文藝復興時人們的想法,後來有人告知,這是神話中睡神與死神是兄弟的緣故。19Please respect copyright.PENANAJvy91Z9ROr
所謂黑色懷抱是只因為其實北極熊的皮膚是黑色的緣故。19Please respect copyright.PENANA6YnwfzdRTC
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假如,時間可以停駐。19Please respect copyright.PENANA2s8jZZICpl
那麼就讓這一秒成為永恆。19Please respect copyright.PENANAt5fcUqK4ir
其實是指現在或過去都可以,過去的話是指和青年一起看的極光能夠停留的話,現在則是指如果在青年笑得那瞬間時間停止的話。因為都是很美麗、光碎片的轉瞬。19Please respect copyright.PENANA42CGonSt5v
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其實本來還想寫一下和青年道別的場景,可是太瑣碎了而且也不長,所以就進入回家模式。19Please respect copyright.PENANAxGgetuL2cW
啊對了,本開端最大謎題是為甚麼熊二郎會變成人形。我好像沒有解釋到,那之後再補吧。19Please respect copyright.PENANALDNRVJiOQs
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要怎麼作,那人才會再回到身邊?是否要如初遇那般,那人才會再度出現然後溫柔地抱起他?這樣嗎?這樣嗎?19Please respect copyright.PENANABZNuEondxZ
這邊的加拿大有崩潰傾向,因為這句話的概念是「是否只要我死了,那人才會再度出現」這樣的想法去寫的。19Please respect copyright.PENANAGsqMWRIZLd
有一種病態的感覺。19Please respect copyright.PENANAjzdHCuj1E0
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被這樣一舔,加拿大迷迷糊糊地抱住了這個散發著暖暖、如同青年氣息的生物,然後傻呼呼地笑了起來。19Please respect copyright.PENANApZq2I655pC
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「 」。19Please respect copyright.PENANAmzS9j71f7m
你回到我身邊了嗎?所以應該有很多人發覺,這裡的白熊是被替代作為青年的存在,是加拿大心的藥劑也是依存。其實我自己重複看,都會覺得那個傻乎乎笑起來的加拿大有種詭異的病感。19Please respect copyright.PENANAGvsWsamxyd
但是我很愛。(啊?)19Please respect copyright.PENANAF3qRFpTgAo
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「 」。19Please respect copyright.PENANA7WTJbDz5XX
這個意思是說,青年剛開始養育加拿大的時候是不會說人話的喔(這什麼話啊)19Please respect copyright.PENANAg8AOUXN9jR
原因應該可以知道WW19Please respect copyright.PENANA28oGwXME8l
關於這段將來會寫成文章,雖然曾是此篇欲意表達的重要內容,可是寫了反而會失位所以就延後寫了,目前大約會以兩角\度去書寫。19Please respect copyright.PENANA5UJRfr2z8N
因為是被熊扶養的緣故(其實青年究竟是什麼呢?這個其實是個很老梗的設定,所以就不多談了。),所以加拿大一開始也不會所謂的語彙,所以張口,是發不出什麼語言的。(類似這樣的感覺)ns 15.158.61.8da2