Eell's Name - Chapter three: Name

Chapter#3: Name

REMEMBERS LINDA'S VOICE READING A FUNNY BOOK: "Oh, Miss... 'Sometimes the world just feels like how he sees it. Sometimes you just can't seem to find beauty or uniqueness anywhere. Is that what a mid-life crisis feels like? Does that feeling just become normalcy at some point? I think there's happiness to be taken away from this, but I think there's a great deal of ineffable sadness to be taken with it. ′ the hell does that mean, Miss? Watched the sunset again?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMhlsu67Ur

Watches the sunset, resting the side of his face on the grave.

Eell: "you're not like me...I love that"

VOICE_NULL: "Excuse me, who are you?"

Wakes up and finds himself on the floor covered in blood. Feels confused. There's a bat underneath his body. Takes a look at it. It's broken. Looks around and finds a crushed bloody body that seems to be hit by a bat in the face and, there's also a knife is in the right eye. he's not terrified, just feels sick because of the air. It smells like shit. Gets closer to the body. The legs are broken, and also the left hand. Like the body has been hit, multiple times, by a SUV. Pushes the head to the right to see the face. But the head rolls away from the body and stops after a moment. and it's Linda's.

Exhales deeply. His pupils dilate. Everything goes black. The dream ends. Somebody is eating God for dinner.

Looks out of the window. The only things he can see are the bleeding holes of non-existent wings on the sun. It's the same sunset he was watching. The darkness takes over and the world gets cold. he says: "guess it's over."

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Linda_READING_THE_BOOK_ABOUT_THAT_KID_WHO_HAD_NO_NAME:

"Kid: What does that even mean? To be different? Different from what, or who? How different? Everyone IS different, they think differently, they have had different experiences, have lived602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2g0RfGMuMI
different lives, so why is there this obsession about being so utterly unique when to an extent, we already are? We live in a world where if you follow the trend you're seen as social602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8lJYPojMo
sheep, and if you are too different, then you're met with raised eyebrows and not-so-subtle whispers. Do you see where this is going, mom? Neither side of the coin fosters comfort or security. Like, you know mom, it's funny sometimes they have such a hard time understanding that they are known as the actions of their adherents rather than what a book says. That's why I stopped resisting and we ate my rabbits for dinner. I wanna destroy the world, cause why not.

Mother: Son, It's not gonna help you, you know. you'll be alone, and rejected, by the most people.

Kid: Whatever, The real thing is, I'm just gonna tell them: "most people don't care about your stupid ideology or believe you even if you say it's about equality and stuff. Get over it already."

Mother: You sure you're just 8? [chuckles]

And after that she gave me the best advice I've ever heard to this moment: 'Leave 'em alone. They've got enough problems already.'

And she continued: I really don't care about right and wrong ... just know what you believe and stick to it....nothing's worse than a squirmy lil' bastard that gives in when602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEYh7XKyFh
others don't agree. I'm a lil' old you know, not my best choice of words but I've come to realize that after a long journey of life.

Mom smiled and looked at me with affection. I was extremely happy."

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MOM: "You can't lie to yourself. It's not always easy to feel the way others feels. But that's nature. natural is good. natural is enough. Try to be ignorant, If you ask me."

Releases his head and pushes him away.

MOM: "Now get lost and do the dishes."

He is looking at the floor. his face is covered by his messy hairs.

Eell: "Mom, you won't leave me, will you?"

She looks at his angry eyes that hardly can be seen.

MOM: "How did you come up with that shit, Leo was here? that little piece of -"

-Flush!-

Eell: "what?"

?: "THE FLUSH. ISN'T IT WORKING PROPERLY?"

Eell: "I like how serious it is. what's the story this time?"

VOICE_1:"A tragic story, about how sometimes, people never escape themselves. You're obsessed with your memories of disgust, every second of your life, until you finally just die, having missed all the human connections you should have been focusing on."

Eell: "Where's the switch?"

He can see the face he is talking to, now. A middle-aged man in a black jacket. They both are watching the crowd on the bridge. After a couple of moments they start walking.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ibVDO7Tjk

[Vivaldi's Winter is playing]

MIDDLE_AGED_MAN: "Okay, You fit the description, flawlessly, you have the reason, the mental element and I can say, a perfect plan. everything perfectly fits. just seems you might have a little assistance, the murders were all at the same time."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ460asW2fYl

Looks at his shiny black jacket. It seems expensive.

Eell: "What was your name, again?"

MIDDLE_AGED_MAN: "Not a good time to play around."

Eell: "I just feel like I know you, John."

A car hits John and runs over him. His briefcase breaks and a lot of papers fly around. The license number of the car was BRF9240.

Eell looks at the corpse. people are gathering around it. he burps.

Eell: "It was very unprofessional. Why were we out here talking about the case?... Anyway, people are so clumsy these days."

HIS_OWN_VOICE_IN _HIS_HEAD: "I want to be trapped in your hug forever, Linda."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgi4aOmuyH
Linda's_VOICE_IN _HIS_HEAD: "You're welcome. you're more than welcome..."

Starts clapping and keeps walking. burps again.

Asks himself in a low voice: "Why the fuck did I eat today?"

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FEMALE_VOICE: "What do you mean by 'THAT'?"

It's dark. he just can see the shapes.

Eell: "Huh-huh. Isn't it obvious?"

FEMALE_VOICE: "It is. bu-t... you're not making any sense!"

Eell: "I'm not making any sense?"

FEMALE_VOICE: "Y- [chuckles] -es."

Eell: "But... huh... I know what's real. As long as it's ME who is making, my imaginations, I can totally, differentiate between them."

FEMALE_VOICE: "Oh My God, you're freaking me out. what the hell is the problem?"

Eell: "I'm talking about the importance of entertainment? No. I'm talking about ... words, words, words..."

FEMALE_VOICE: "you wanna can do it again? what do you-"

Eell: "You're Mima, a human... You're Asian. No you're not."

FEMALE_VOICE: "Are you feeling alright?"

Eell: "I'm just getting a clue. And I'm not feeling alright, I'm not feeling anything, feeling, and feeling, and feeling, let me try thinking instead, how about thinking alright? there is no 'thinking alright', right? maybe there is no 'feeling alright', too..."

FEMALE_VOICE: " Yes, [inhales] you're probably sick. It's serious."

Gets up the bed and looks at his naked body which seems empty of any kind of life. "He's drowned in the nobody-knows-where-land", She thought.

FEMALE_VOICE: "Bullshit... If that's all you gonna say, you need help. and I'm sorry, I've got a lot of SHIT in my own life. I've had enough sick people in my life."

Eell follows Elizabeth's curves with his eyes and ends up to her not-so-content face. he is trying to understand what he just heard.

Eell: "Just like that?"

Elizabeth: "What did you expect? you're telling me a bunch of nonsense after fucking the shit out of me. well, that's not fucking normal. Anyway, don't call me, okay? It was a602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvPahjVeJW
one-day-thing."

Eell: "One-Day-Thing... What do you mean by 'THAT' ? "

Elizabeth: "Oh, yeah? how about you telling me that you killed me with a bat ? I'm out of here, knew you had some serious problems."

Eell: "I was just, talking my mind... and being honest."

She is putting on her clothes.

Elizabeth: "Maybe it doesn't work."

Picks up her handbag and opens the door. he can see the moon shining in the sky.

Eell: "It doesn't work(?)..."

She closes the door. but he is thinking about something else, not love, justice or himself.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmseQBdNX1T
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Elizabeth: "What kind of music do you listen to?"

Eell: "Everything that makes me remember the feeling of being free in my mental universe and provokes me into thinking seriously but not surely."

They're looking through the blue surface of water, bending over the fence, again. her clothes are all wet.

Elizabeth: "Well, that's... something."

Eell: "Like pop psychology?"

Elizabeth: "No, I don't think so."

Eell_SINGING_A_SONG: "God is great and God is good and let us thank him for our food, Amen A-A-A-A-Amen, God is great and God is good and let us thank him for food, we will thank him for our food! [NOT_SINGING_A_SONG_ANYMORE] never liked that song, it didn't seem even close-to-the-origin-she-wanted-to-be, the girl had a scary voice, like she was an artificial angel trying to seduce 'good' people. HaHaha..."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTut45HNOe

Elizabeth: "Well, That's not very nice. That was me. I was thirteen I think."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpS1Wwu0Z4p

Eell: "Maybe you were an artificial angel when you were thirteen then."

Elizabeth: "That's weird."

Eell: "You could be a lot of things without remembering any of them, you know, It's a self-destruction thing. you start over, you could be even Satan or God himself when you were a kid."

Elizabeth: " [tries to laugh but fails] Cut the crap. [groans] well, huh. I'm just not, interested."

Eell: "It's okay, I understand, got some red sauce on your sandwich. you like the white ones."

Elizabeth takes THE TOMATO OUT of her sandwich and throws it in the water.

ELIZABETH_ALMOST_THROWING_UP: "Told you to tell him not to put any tomatoes."

Eell_STARING_AT_HER_FACE: "They do it anyway."

And Eell thinks to himself how beautiful the moon is and how unbelievably simple and accidental the events of a life are.

Elizabeth: "OK. Let's go to my place. I don't think I wanna hang around here anymore. Maybe we can have a little fun."

Eell: "F-words are, forbidden words."

He loves the moon. The moon is dancing naked in the ironically sacred night and apparently it's not doing any of them, cause it's a piece of rock, he thought.

Elizabeth: "What did you say?"

Eell: "Over the moon, I said."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHmso9XimOo
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Eell: "My name is Eell. E-E-L-L."

It's raining.

Elizabeth: "That's a weird name. What does it mean?"

Eell: "the meaning? you mean the thing that people get together to agree on one of them? Sometimes they just don't."

Elizabeth: "It means something. Come one."

Eell: "Well, how about 'come on'? It means 'come on'. "

Elizabeth: "I mean, what does it really mean?"

They're in the street she lives on. They can see their reflection on a puddle.

Eell: "You really like MEANINGS, don't you?" and gives her one of those smiles people normally don't like to see and call it 'mad'.

Elizabeth; "Seems you don't like to talk about it. Well, I was not that curious, anyways."

Eell: " [stares at her] Many teachers think that is not correct English."

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Eell: "Did you hear me? I just told you my name."

THE_WOMAN_ON_THE_TRAIN: "didn't hear you. you told me that?"

He looks neutral.

Eell: "I wanted to make a conversation. people do that to start being friends and, sometimes, when have plan to have a sexual intercourse in a committed long-time relationship."

She changes her tone.

THE_WOMAN_ON_THE_TRAIN: " [half closes her eyes]How about 'not taking a long time'? You look goood [winks]. "

Eell: "If that's what you want, I respectfully accept. It seems I found someone I can talk to, today, while walking that 'someone' home."

She laughs and her certificate slips out of her hand, and falls on her shoes. He takes it and reads the name: "Mima Mole". passes the card to her and looks at her big mole under her right eye.

Mima: "what was your name again?"

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Leonard: "I'm ending it all."

Eell: "you're ending what?"

Leonard: "It's not gonna be how it looks."

Eell: "But why would you do that? I mean, the thing, that you're not telling me anything about it."

Leonard: "You really like fun, don't you?"

Eell: "No. The last time I used that tone, things got really shitty for the person I was talking to."

Leonard: "Can't say you're wrong."

Eell: "You're gonna do that with my 'scissors', L?"

L: "And you're gonna have fun. Yes. And the angle; and everything is how it should be."

Eell: "Predestination!"

L: "Absolutely!"

And cuts his throat with that scissors in a weird position from a very difficult angle.

Eell calls an ambulance. and waits for someone to pick up the phone, looking at the corpse.

Eell: "Hello. Someone here cut his throat. Yeah he's, bleeding. Just now. OK. The first row house in- yeah, that Bakery street. OK."

Turns off the phone and puts in his pocket. Leonard is, still, choking and bleeding. takes out the knife. takes a look at him and says: "I use it as my knife kitchen. I lost, the last one."

Goes to the sink and washes the scissors. takes a couple of sausages and slices them. Hums to himself as he finds a bun and puts them in it. then goes to the corpse and takes the keys.

[NO_MUSIC_IS_PLAYING]

Eell_ASSUMING_THERE_IS_AN_ACTUAL_SONG: "The fuck is this song in my head? Silence?"

He is now in Leo's car. Sighs and turns on the engine. His existence is itchy. but he knew it doesn't mean anything. leaves the place. the license number of the car is BRF9240.

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Eell: " [Sighs] ... There was a young man walking in the rain... [Grumble Grumble] he was singing..."

Im.girl: "You're remembering the wrong song. It should be 'so easy', I suppose."

Eell: "fuck off, Imagination. I've got shit to do. I'm sorry about the swearing. I just need to focus. So I hope you don't, what's the word, 'MISS' the point in this, Situation?"

Im.girl: "Well, Since I know you, It's no problem, Eell."

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Eell: "You know how ridiculously mysterious it is? I was at the beach; and I was fifteen. A girl came and sat near me. she asked me If I would like to swim with her and her friends and I told her that, huh, her friends are a bunch of idiots and, When I found out that girl was you, I found it amazing. They made a movie out of it, six year later. I found it amazing."

Linda: "It was an interesting made-up story. though, I can see the metaphors. And the [kisses his lips] rush. Come here, [and passionately hugs him] my dear."

He closes his eyes and enters in a world of uncreated existences and flies towards the unborn galaxies of life and successfully fails to exist. All he can see is 'her' face, actually, in everything he can see, like she is the God of the raw materials that are not 'material', God of his world. How warm and sweet she felt, indescribable... he thought. He could kiss anything and she was there to be kissed.

Eell: "I want you to be trapped in my hug forever, Linda." and wonders if it has any meaning.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFmHGrbbic

Linda: "Wish I had a secret door that I could hide you in my chest. All to myself."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKVfQgXNEu

Eell: "Me too. Then there would be no way for you to die before I do. It's a huge universe inside me. [cries suddenly] I'm a piece of shit."

He shakes his head.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuqerD1GpUF

Linda_WITH_A_HORRIFIED_LOOK_ON_HER_FACE: "No, You're NOT! look at me! You're everything to me! You're not what she used to call you. It's not a fault... loving me is not a fault... let them say whatever they want.. you are, the greatest thing I've seen, heard, tasted... you're, my everything. I'd die without you. I want you to do the thing that I've never let anyone do [INAUDIBLE] to me. [holds him as tight as possible] You're the star that shines in my sky at nights, days, the times nobody knows what can be called. Now go inside me. I want you there, dear."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbmO6HKXf3

And she kisses him trying to fill him up with the insane love she feels, feeling the unbelievable urge to have him all inside her, for the first time.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3Yp8292S1

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It's a show. Turns off the TV.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKyhropXUp

Eell: "They really like to fuck, don't they? well, that's not the problem, It's showing the process of fucking. they like having a toast. well, I think it's better when you get to know the brand, first."

Im.girl: "OK. I was trying to make you not do this."

Eell: "Now you can shut up."

Opens the notebook and starts reading a line: 'It's the last day I'm in this shithole. Aunt Cheew was a very beautiful woman, he said. He fucked that bitch's ugly ass everyday, probably. People normally don't use it as an excuse, then why did he leave her? and then took the kid back. If he just hadn't take Leo none of this would have happened in the first FUCKING place.′ [Stops reading] eight years ago. Not doing it was really hard, wasn't it?... Oh, you can, talk."

Im.girl: "I wasn't born yet. Did you forget?"

Eell_TALKING_TO_HIS_ROOMMATE_WHO_HAS_A_BLUE_SHIRT: "Yes, I did."

The room is empty.

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Eell: "You're Eric's little sister, right? He asked me to get you there. I've come to take you home."

THE_WOMAN_ON_THE_TRAIN: "I don't have any plans. You must be his friend, the one he talks about his creative mind. I met you in the hospital. [points to her arm] you right arm was fucked and... I don't really remember It was a long time, ago. I should be concerned about the reliability of my memory."

Eell:"Being concerned about something doesn't help to solve it, necessarily."

She makes a thoughtful face and her phone rings.

THE_WOMAN_ON_THE_TRAIN: "That's a good point."

The phone is ringing.

Eell: "Then I suppose you don't remember my name either."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlsCRWpxpka
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Eell: "Now... You're all... alone... feeling... like no~body wants you... and looking... for someone... to hold your hands... someone... who understands... Bum, bu-bum..."

He is driving on a road out of town, looking for a specific house.

Eell: "Where's... mommy's home?... Mommy says... she loves... me... more than everything..."

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He gets out of her room and turns off the light. Finds her gently touching a book.

Eell: "I see you found it."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwsPiNAiJe

Linda: "Yay. let me read the line I love the most. [Starts reading] 'I want to know, to be able to create, And see what I couldn't see before in the things I've seen before. I know I need someone to get out of, or, be able to manage, this situation and I know I can't can't have that person in this situation. It seems like an infinite loop of go-fuck-yourself. And I can't find ~any~ practical answer...′ he told me that! can you believe it, Jane?

And Jane said: I just read the note you left, Oh, Miss, 'Sometimes the world just feels like how he sees it. Sometimes you just can't seem to find beauty or uniqueness anywhere. Is that what a mid-life crisis feels like? Does that feeling just become normalcy at some point? I think there's happiness to be taken away from this, but I think there's a great deal of ineffable sadness to be taken with it.′ the hell does that mean, Miss? Watched the sunset again? [Stops reading] Ah, It's so funny, I never get tired of reading these lines..."

Eell: "It was... the book I wrote when I was sixteen. It's a stupid book."

Linda: "No. I like it. It's hilarious."

Eell: "There is a natural craving for novelty. When that craving overcomes and supplants real love, relationships, and commitments, you become a Michael Stone."

Linda: "Who's Micheal Stone?"

Eell: "A writer that I, used to read his unfamiliar stories. Hmm... do you really like it?"

Linda: "well, to be honest, I love it. The mental picture of a teenage boy who wants to be happy, and, wants to make everything look happy. "

Eell: "... Oh, Linda, Ah, Can I tell you 'something'?"

Linda: "Sure. I'm all ears."

Eell: "The thing that has been bugging me for a long time, that feeling that I can't tell anyone about it, cause I don't want anyone to know... [makes an eye contact with her shiny eyes] I had no one to talk to, about it, well..."

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Eric: "No, I know you, man. we work together. It's almost five years. now for God's sake, put that gun away."

Eell: "You can never be sure enough, but at least you can be 'more' sure, about your interactions, what you see and the stability of the reality you feel, Huh?"

Eric: "True, but No one, no matter how beautiful or unique or special you think they are, is going to be the cure for your depression. You gotta do it yourself."

Eell: "You don't seem to be listening... How sad [shoots him in the eye] your life ended, not trying to be more... sure."

Kicks the dead body with a feeling of satisfaction.

Eell: "Wait a minute. You didn't ask 'Why' ?"

-----------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡag0X9S98Qn

[La Musica Prima Del Massacro is playing]

He deeply inhales and takes a look at the house. It's a pretty house, he thinks. Smiles and gets out of the car.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvabgTJ0fVQ

Rings the bell. touches the door. There is a tiny painting of a lion on the door.

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Eell: "you're real in an unreal way. beyond my imaginations."

Linda: "You don't need imaginations anymore, I'll be them. I'll fill your mind until we both overflow with 'the we inside'. I wanna be in the deepest pathways of your mind, and your existence."

Eell: "It reminds me of a story. the story of a guy who never wanted to wear a hat. he enjoyed the sun and, spending time with his cows. he really loved the sun. Until that one night he prayed to God if he could marry the sun.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLIbqky5ZZa
God himself came down from heaven and told him in a calm voice that a human and a star can't live together. God failed. and he killed his cows, all of them, and then shot himself. they say after that God never came down to see a human. Cause he knew people will never understand his concept of being hurt. God is a jerk, for thinking that, If you ask me."

Linda; "He's a total jerk, to keep you away from me, all these years and then giving you to me when I'm not sane anymore... Which means It's not good as people say. and I like it when it's not 'good' as people say. cause I can do it all myself, for rest of my life. think about it, the best lovers on the planet. I never liked good guys in the movies, they seemed so [looks through his eyes] lame."

Eell: "lame... you never called me anything lame."

Linda: "Cause you're full of surprises. every time I look at you I find another reason to live."

Eell: "It's amazing that words come, though I don't like using them."

Linda: "Cause you're being honest."

Eell: "feeling to want to be fully honest in every possible way like it's my own mind that I'm talking to. Like it's kind of a madness."

Linda: "you're experiencing love."

ME: "Yes, I am."

I used to use more describing words when I told a story, maybe it's all because of the madness, he thought.

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Two shadows in the night, and the big big dark jungle behind them, making ghost noises. They are watching the sky, both sitting on the car.

Eell: " 'Sometimes I, deep down, want them all, to live a happy life, and smile. I love it when I see how they can get along. Just, when I see none of them is me, I feel emptier than before. empty enough to not care about how hard it would be for them, how sick they would feel, how horrifying It'd be for them, But, I know it all, though I don't care, And when I know, I get these conclusions that I should NOT do anything to hurt them. maybe I feel it's fair when they get hurt and I can consider it 'how the world works', but I also know I can help them and maybe, I, can sit and watch when someone cuts off their head but It wouldn't be how I want my life to end if I were them. JUST sometimes, then, it all disappears. Cause most of the times they don't make sensible decisions, and they get the consequences they should've thought of before shit happens And I find it logical, again, to have my strange reaction, and response. I love my rabbits, mom. I just think we better not cook them tonight, OK? ' [stops reading] I like the book. It's one of the earliest works of Michael Stone."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9YrzwtqXK

Linda: " [pleasantly smiles] It's so sweet. was that a girl?"

Eell: "He never mentions anything about the kid."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcNFT3MyWG

[Caravan is playing]602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKO8bGPWUQ5

Eell: "You wanna know something?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqTRooq8xP

Linda: "Can't wait to hear."

Eell: "There are some places where consensual incest is a crime."

Linda: "[awkwardly smiles] Yes, there are."

Eell: "I mean... [Linda talks] Stupid cunts!... [Eell chuckles and continues] ... like "incest is a crime"... really? I'm not saying It's right, or It's wrong, genetic diseases aside, but "a crime"?... [Linda talks again] you have no right to put your nose in other people's business..."

A shooting star sped across the night sky.

Eell: "I like it, seeing you talking like that, not caring about formality or morality."

Linda: "The words you just mentioned-"

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Linda: "It's so sweet. was that a girl?"

Eell_&_Linda: "he never mentions anything about the KID."

Linda: "You wanna know something?"

Eell: "Can't wait to hear."

Linda: "There are some places where consensual incest is a crime."

Puts her head on his shoulder.

Eell: "Yes, there are."

Linda: "I mean... Stupid cunts!... [chuckles]... like "incest is a crime"... really? I'm not saying It's right, or It's wrong, genetic diseases aside, but "a crime"?... you have no right to put your nose in other people's business..."

Eell: "I like it, seeing you talking like that, not caring about formality or morality."

All of those moments, like it was yesterday, but it was not. the jungle was still there, but the clouds crumbling and dying to be born again . Why 'was'?, he thinks.

Eell: "The words you just mentioned, I could remember, see?"

Linda: "Now that we're talking about 'remembering', You know, I think, mISERY COMES FR0M... NOT HAVING Anyone tO TAlK TO... And a nice day? The day you have nothing in the world to worry about."

Eell: "what a beautiful thing to say, simply told."

Linda: "Ha-ha-ha [charmingly smiles and her smile turns to laughter] A lot of people told me 'It was uninteresting' when I told them."

Eell: "A lot of people don't like gore and graphic sexual content."

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[WwiseDefaultBank_VO_Patient_Male_Ward_Bsmt.003 is playing]

Im.girl: "heartless bastard."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXSrxqAv8m

Eell: "let's see if somebody gives me 'THAT'... then I'll believe the pow-wer it has. Actually I love being called a heartless bastard. I live with reasons. They live with me. And, It's a survival skill, It doesn't satisfy you. 'THAT' is like you do something unreasonable but you think it's really worth it. Sometimes that's how choices are made."

Im.girl: "Then let's make it look real. love."

Eell: "You see that naked tree. A naked tree, I see."

Im.girl: "like a really easy game..."

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Eell: "Words Words Words Blah Blah Blah! Loud noises!"

Elizabeth: "Are you okay?"

Eell: "I'm singing a song! A song is being sung by me! Singing a song!"

Elizabeth: "What's this all about? Are you high or something?"

Eell: "Certainty? You can say it's sick if you think saying "it's lovely" is not the way you wanted to push the first domino that has certain consequences."

ElizaB-_eTD: "I w_W_wnmT some of what you've be-Ei-Ei-en smokin, [undeclared noises] ."

Eell: "what?"

------------------------------------

Eell: "When I don't know the person enough to make a conclusion, I find it very suspicious and probably dangerous.being praised, I don't like it."

Elizabe--nda: "You are a An [A tape is playing] asshole. Annoying. Amazing. Abomination. Adjective. Ador-. Awesome. Alarmi-ISTIST!. Awful. Anonymous. Alive(?). [slower] Appealing. [faster] Arrogant. Affectionate-Youel-el-la'-ckinglea'-kingli'-cking- Ambiguous. "

Eell_TALKING_TO_Eell: "LIFE is too short to be worried about what people say. I'm not gonna [fast backward] I'm sure [fastER backward] I'm gonna tell Linda she is the one that I always wanted in my life."

Im.girl: "Really? It's not ruining her life [asks in hopeful voice] right?"

[Singing a song without any rhythm] [so easy is playing]

Eell: " [humming] Sometimes, Sometimes unknowingly-"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBLxI8VY2r

-------------------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwEzZyeIeC8

Eell: "Why do I exist?"

He is underwater. he is not swimming, and, a ~lot~ of legs moving around, he can see all of them. He says to himself in himself: "Oh, I see..."

Im.girl: "I can see through your -WORDS-"

Someone grabs his hand.

-------------------------------------

Eell: " [humming] ...You find yourself in a dilemma..."

Gets off the couch.

-------------------------------------

Eell: "Yes. Of course."

Faceless_Friend: "You're the new kid?"

SERIOUS_Eell: "Yes. I am. I AM the new kid. Now we can swim together. the new kid and, the strangers. Yep."

He is nine.

------------------------------------

Eell: " [humming and snapping] ...Sometimes everything is alright but it seems like..."

Closes the car door. and continues whispering: "...that you are a mistake, just like a very easy game, pieces have fallen beside other pieces, [whispers] not really sure about that piece [turns on the engine and continues singing] It's not even my job to say what's right and what's wrong, but we're all, sometimes-"

------------------------------------

Elizabeth is coming, a big big smile on her face, and she finds him talking out loud bending over the fence and staring at the sea .

Eell: "I'm a lot of things and I'm not a lot of things at the same time. [laughs quietly] I just happen to choose what to do, and who to be, [changes his tone] at the moment. I use the database I have and live in the mental universe of getting the new from the same. If you ask me it's a progress from the concept of having a personality, that's a whole new level, where you choose the thing you need to do without having pre-definitions which eventually come to create things like prejudice and demands and wishes, and they destroy your experience of interaction you need to ha- [sighs] why would they print the word 'love' on socks? "

Elizabeth: "Who are you talking to? [annoyed face] YOU'RE CRAZY, aren't you?"

Eell: "And so everybody. It's just a matter of time. If you mean exactly based on what it actually means."

-----------------------------------

Eell_SPITTING_BLOOD_ON_THE_FLOOR: "It looks sad to them, when it's just... empty. cause it never grows again?"

-----------------------------------

PLATONIC_FRIEND: "...I learn, and I forget the thing I've learned if it's not actually helpful."

Eell: "You're a platonic friend. What does that mean, again?"

PLATONIC_FRIEND: "We don't fuck."

Eell: "never...?"

PLATONIC_FRIEND: "Never."

Eell: " [confused] NeVER? [waiting for an answer] "

PLATONIC_FRIEND: "Yes. [smiles playing with her handbag] "

Eell: "The hell, Why are you smiling, then?"

He is fifteen.

------------------------------------

Mom: "They told me I never could get pregnant."

Eell: "Never...?"

Miss. Cheew: "never."

Spits on the ground and looks at her again.

She grabs the knife.

He is four.

-----------------------------------

Leonard's car radio is on. Null voices are whispering all together: "Seeko Seeko Secko Socko Sicko Sicko Sicko Sicko Sick Sick SIcK sICK [they clear their throat] Why? THE RRREASON. laugh, laugh, laugh, cry, be stable! unstable, now stable. Words Definitions Reasons Connections Links, Impolite, Horrible, Irrational?, split, comp-plicated. "

The door opens and she gets surprised seeing him.

Leonard: "I always thought you like dogs, Sen."

Sen: "What happened? [hesitates and takes a look at his appearance] why are you here?"

Leonard: "Elizabeth, was not home. Then I came here. There was no room in that motel. [steps in the house] It's good to be out anyway."

Sen: "out of jail? [gets curious] what did you do?"

Leonard: "None of your business. I... just need a place to sleep tonight."

-----------------------------------

NULL_VOICE: "Introversion?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qPBTJ2jBG

Throws the pliers on the table and cleans the blood from his face.

Eell: "There is no FIGHT."

he is fifteen.

-----------------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeyP7HyIHFK

[Winter-meltdown is playing]

He thought: 'Rings the bell again and clears his throat. He can hear the steps getting closer to the door. Looks at Leonard's car and thinks about the word 'insolence'. Was 'Overbearing' a usable word, here, for the type of insolence he was dealing with?, he thought. But 'Disgust' and 'Mindless violence' were not close enough. He is desperately looking for a word, but words are not enough, sometimes, in some- oh dear, can we just skip it?, he thought, not me, he thought.′

Eell rings the bell again and clears his throat. seems the host is not that kind of I'm-not-gonna-say-fuck-it person. looks at Leonard's car.

"Poor car, falling off the road and a lot of other shit. poor materials of course. poor nature. DEVELOPING." he said.

Someone is behind the door. He can see the shoes. Blood is all over his face.

He shouted: "It's me."

Someone is unlocking the door.

------------------

Eell: "That's the point of a lot of stories. Things are fucked up because we've made them that way. We could act differently, but we've built up too much stuff that gets in the way and forces us to act by an unnatural set of rules."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWlldmwbNXC

TAXI_DRIVER: "What movie is that?"

he is ten.

----------------

PLATONIC_FRIEND: "Take care."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZEAcit9pR

She smiles.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQLv4K9Tpan

Eell: "Take care of what? My dick? you fucking stupid platonic friend."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNUswvqddj0

He is fifteen.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvzmmU348u
-----------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfQGSJpp3e

[Requiem for a dream-Remix2 is playing]

He is driving the car. and Im.girl is sitting in the next seat.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmsawFbvnk

Im.girl is terrified.

Eell: "Sometimes we're the ones who are riding it sometimes we're the ones who are walking. [humming] I'm out, enough of this this game. I'm out, and you lose. [everything turns red]"

------------------

[still playing]

Eell_WATCHING_HIROSHIMA_BEING_NUKED: " *staring in disbelief* Oh, no

Eell_WATCHING_HIROSHIMA_BEING_NUKED: " [staring in disbelief] Oh, no... Oh, no... Oh, no... why... I'm not disgusted... I'm, just strongly disappointed... There's no winner... no one's better... all people, just trying to survive... survival... they see... they forget... no one cares... no one helps... no one changes..."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTzbpkb1bf8

Power cut.

Eell: "I need to kill someone."

he is eight.

------------------

[still playing]

THE_WOMAN_WHO_HE_IS_SMILING_AT: "Please, [tears falling off her face] I'm begging you... pleas- [tries to touch his shoulder but he steps back] "

He is feeling the pleasure, The heat. It's so satisfying. It's like an extra amount of blood flowing in his veins.

Eell: "you're begging?"

THE_WOMAN_WHO_HE_IS_SMILING_AT: "Yeah. I-I'll give it back as soon as possible. I just, need to get rid of them. they don't know you, that's why I'm here. Just, I ca-I can-"

He just takes another step back and slowly closes the door.

THE_WOMAN_WHO_HE_IS_SMILING_AT: "Wait wait wait!"

She tries to grab his hands. And he slams the door to smash her fingers and laughs out loud.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYV55XF63a

-------------------

[still playing]

Im.girl: "Where are we going?"

Eell: " [humming louder] It's possible to throw the pieces, a little more simple. it's possible to give up easier. It's possible to lose easier. It can be, sometimes, easier to stay together."

Finds Linda in the contacts list and pushes the call button.

[The Music Stops]

------------------

NON_EXISTENT_MOTHER: "Happy happy happy face, Deep deep down drowned in this place, This young boy who never grins, Do you know how happy he- Wake up."

Wakes up. he is in the kitchen. Finds his dream a little scary. how about frightening?, he thought.

he is twenty.

------------------

He can see her house lights are on.

Eell: "Hmm... [humming] sing along with this game's rhythm, loud [humming louder] losing your hmm to run from the loneliness, I lost my hmm, what a beautiful mistake, you were putting the pieces and I was making the dreams, you easily won and I seriously lost it. [humming]"

parks the car in front of her house. opens the car door and jumps out. runs up the stairs and rings the bell. He could see the open windows. she looks at him from up there and says: "Oh, It's you."

He closes his eyes and forgets all of the monsters that lived under his bed, the one who screamed all night, the one who licked his eyeballs and the one who strangled him to death and ate him. The door flies open and he opens his eyelids.

Linda: "Hi! how are you?"

Eell: "Now I'm better."

--------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbv4ZLEwmH

Sen: "Let's not fight over it. It seems I'm not the stronger one, [looks at the floor] anymore, but now, [looks at his frozen eyes] things are different. I love you honey, I want you to602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Ao3G468Nd
do this, [He is walking away] I still need you, he-hey..."

Eell: "What the FUCK are you talking about? Stay away from me, [points at her] or you'll regret."

he is fifteen.

--------------------

[Mr.Nobody is playing]

THE_WOMAN_WITH_A_GUN: "Why are you here? It's [opens the door wider] dangerous here"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtI5vhIf6t

Eell: "How about telling me you love me after me asking you, countless times, if you do and you saying that you don't? [deeply exhales] Oh, Mom. It's been a long time. The last time I talked to you I said very cruel things like 'stay away form me or you'll regret '. But, Did you know that you can manipulate your memories? I always do that for fun, HAHA."

Mom: "What happened, Ee- d-dear?"

Eell: "The shit is just so deep I can't walk in it. Leo killed three people and then himself. He even killed Elizabeth. I think it has to do something with me. Cause he made it clear he's gonna602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypHsfLALBb
make a big trouble for me."

She tries to look sad. though she is NOT.

Sen: "Oh, no. how could he do - that s-..."

Eell: "You might knew, you probably even told him something, that obviously you did. You did that, right?"

No matter how hard he tries, he just can see a gun being carried by a middle-aged woman.

Miss.Cheew: "I was- I was just jealous of her and told him about you and- and he didn't say anything when I told him, I didn't know he's gonna do that beca- jeje- just because I- because I never wanted- [cries] "602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzEKnPYn7Tr

Eell: "You thought that I'm gonna marry you, huh? [laughs] But, the reason I came here today, is to tell you I have the money. I can give it to you. [smiles]"

She seems not to be sure about what his said.

THAT_WOMAN: "look I know, It's, not the right time to mention it again, but I really need that money. I'm in a lot of debt, to some dangerous guys."

He fakes a surprised face in a really genuine way.

Eell: "Dangerous?"

A_FEMALE_HUMAN: "Yeah. Really dangerous guys. They'll kill me this time. [looks stressed] you really mean it? the last time I came to your plac-"

Eell: "Oh, forget it. Yeah of course, A man in a suit is not necessarily a 'good' man, but [tries to control his laughter] just What did you exactly say to Leo? I mean the exactly the same words..."

He can totally feel the nonexistent humidity.

#: "That y-you're fucking her. I-"

Eell: "perfect. [wide open eyes] to Leo?"

_: "...Yes."

Eell: "And nothing more?"

: "Yes."

Eell: "I'll see you tomorrow then, don't worry about it and oh, give me their numbers guess I, need to tell them about it, that you're gonna paying the jinx, you don't want them around, do you? ...so, you can put that gun away and sleep without worrying about tomorrow. "

-Their numbers?

Eell: " [mimics her voice] Yes."

----------------

Eell_TALKING_TO_THE_MIRROR: "Hate and anger? Strong words? Come one. hate is not a strong word unless you use it with passion. And the flaming passion, that's what fucks you up. hmm? what do you think?"

The mirror is covered with blood. Stares into the red red bloody mirror. He can see how the world ends.

he is fifteen.

----------------

They're both in the car.

Eell: "I'm thinking about 'our old place at 11 PM tonight'. Seems to be 'good'. [grinds his tooth together] Oh, judgment, judgment, judgment."

She just nods.

--------------------

Linda: "Do you remember? [reminds him a song] England, France, America, Siblings of the hell..."

Im.girl: "Enough of enough of enough of this."

Eell_TALIKNG_LIKE_HE_IS_TELLING_YOU_A_STORY: "all of our three babies were hiding in the shell... Instinct... Just Instinct?... Instinct?... [shocked] Confusion. Civilization. Corruption. God. Good. Evil. Devil."

Linda: "It's almost midnight. [smiles] Did you wanna talk about something with me?"

Eell: "Yes."

--------------------

They are listening to a music, and it's fucking loud.

FUCKING_LOUD_MUSIC: "Sweet dreams are made of this, Who am I to disagree?, I travel the world..."

They're looking at her face, with just a sheet covering them. His smile grows so wide. But he doesn't say a word.

THE_SCARED_MIDDLE_AGED_FUCKING_STRESSED_OUT: "I- P-Please just listen- t-to what I'm saying, I'm in, debt, I, If [he can see her voice and hear her face, he thinks] I-"

FUCKING_LOUD_MUSIC: "And the seven seas, Everybody's looking for something. HAHAHHAH-HOOO-AHAHAHA"

Linda: "Don't come here ever again."

FUCKING_LOUD_MUSIC: "Some of them want to use you, Some of them want to get used by you"

Eell can't stop smiling. he is actually biting his tongue to NOT laugh maniacally. He finally takes another breath and looks at the taxi. It's leaving. LEAVING... LEAVE... LEAVES... TREES... LIFE... TIME... VOICES... PICTURES.

FUCKING_LOUD_MUSIC: "Some of them want to abuse you, Some of them want to be abused, Everybody is looking for something!! "

They close the door, looking through her eyes.

--------------------

Someone is sitting in a dark room. and the moon is shining in the sky, and the sky, totally clear.

I_DON'T_KNOW: "What's this? Why am I feeling I'm overflowing with life? What is this? This feeling-so-filled-up-with-laughing-screams-despite-being-empty. I need to kill someone. I want to, no.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIbwRbFVbx
This life, this...No. I don't want to. [Eell enters the room, finds her talking to the wall] I just need it, I guess. I need to tear something apart, maybe that valuable life of her. this is not anger. Cause I'm totally in control of my mind, and my mind is totally in my control. I'm not gonna kill anyone. everyone has the right to liv- [hugs her]"

Eell: "Linda, what happened? what is this?"

Linda: "It's nothing Just sometimes I feel like to, and, need to talk to someone. Nothing important. I've seen some therapists, don't worry about it. Anyway, It's been a long time, I wanna ask the same question [looks at his red eyes] 'What happened'..."

Eell: "I was just a little busy. [her eyes reminds him of something] It's been three months, I think. Yeah busy."

--------------------

Wakes up and finds THE MOM on the couch. She is half-asleep. The room is dark. And TV is on, mute.

Eell: "A-Aunt Sen, I had a scary dream."

Mom: "then why stop dreaming when you wake up?"

He can't see her face in the dark.

Eell: "I think you heard me wrong."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJsB5t0AyIa

It's his first hour in that motel.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRdxwRzlaV

Mom: "No, I didn't."

He can't get it, that what's the matter with aunt Sen?

He is four.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOvYgs9oMl

--------------------

He is in a phone booth, listening very carefully to the not-very-calm man and having a strong eye contact with Sen.

The fear in her face is the only thing that she is definitely not faking.

--------------------

Eell: "Do you want... an ice cream? Vanilla."

Elizabeth: "Yeah. but not vanilla. [tilts her head] you like vanilla?"

Eell: "It doesn't matter. Cause none of them are you."

Elizabeth: " [laughing] Excuse me? Hahaha."

Eell: "It's just I like blood; [chuckles] as long as It's not mine."

Elizabeth: "Uuh... creepy."

Eell: "You know... cutting off the head and stuff, The sound that blood makes when it spurts out... it sounds like ~music~ to my ears. "

Elizabeth: "Wow. we have a homicidal maniac here."

He hesitates for a moment and then clears his mind.

Eell: " [tries to laugh and succeeds] HA-HA. I'll be back in a minute."

Elizabeth: "Hmmm, OK."

---------------------

They both are staring at the ceiling like there is a sun shining right fucking there.

Eell touches her soft cheeks and imagines a pelican stretching its wings to fly.

Eell: "when I was a kid I thought everyone has that emptiness in the heart that doesn't let them be happy for a long time."

Linda: "It's hard to tell since time is limited and, we grow old so fast."

Eell: "I want to admire you so bad, with using a very simple sentence... But the next moment I think 'everybody can say those words In think'. and my mind starts diving in the empty ocean of words. animals see me, but they don't talk. they don't talk to me."

closes his eyes one more time and thinks about God's liver.

Eell: "I've had enough of games. I'm sick of, games... You don't play games."

Linda:"Cause I know what I want. [holds his hand] the thing you wanted to say, what's that 'sentence'?"

Eell: "you're beautiful."

---------------------

They're in the car driving to heaven. There is a face in the sky laughing at the memories humans don't remember, and a holy song in the background. he doesn't give a shit.

Eell: "There has been a problem, about the money, and, well, we're gonna get a loan from someone I know. And the thing is, I probably can't come with you. I had a call from one of the guys I work with and, I have an important job to do tonight."

THING :"what's that?"

Eell: "I, just need to buy something."

The satisfaction is beyond his ability to control. Suddenly smiles. and the next moment he's not smiling anymore.

--------------------

He is in the room. throws the envelope on the mini-freezer.

Eell: "I love the fact that the civilized ones are the sickest shit... you might ask Why."

Stevie: " [takes the envelope and opens it] OK, You used guns before, right? Just don't fuck it up, man. don't get yourself killed."

Eell: " [smiles contently] Sure."

Stevie: "OK."

Eell: "Now, Where's my honey?"

--------------------

WALL: "How about eating her alive?"

Eell: "No, That'd be too good for her. I'm not gonna let her feel she is special."

he is in school. he is fifteen.

--------------------

Eell: "I never stop dreaming. [tearsup]" Why can't I laugh? [suddenly changes his tone] Fuck LAUGHING. What, is 'this'... a dream? If it is, why can't I control it? who's making the puzzles? and who's giving me the hints?"

M&^*@: "Lick that pussy like your fuckin' life depends on it! You're fuckin' mine. I OWN you."

Eell: "Shut your 'SHITHOLE', Mom."

Moth)r: "You think you can wake up without getting insane?"

Eell: "I'm not insane."

Mother: "Then who killed Elizabeth, Eric, Linda and... Leonard."

Eell: "They don't exist. They're just ME."

MOther: "They exist. I, EXIST. You cannot forget. You cannot cage them."

Eell: "I'm not caging anything. This conversation is over."

MOTHEr: "No, I'm not talking about reality. You cannot cage your dreams."

Eell: "THIS IS BULLSHIT."

<MOTHER>: "Of course. What did you expect? Sleep. and I'll be there torturing your soul."

Eell: "There is no soul."

And grabs his shotgun.

#Eell: "THERE IS, NO SOUL!"

: "Yes, 'I' told you that. just forgot what I told you, for an hour."

Cocks the gun and aims her head. And wakes up.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRYRQD2Dfi
---------------------

Eell: "Stevie... I need a gun. yeah. yeah, a shotgun. don't fucking ask questions. Sure. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, There is no trouble. It's great. [exhales] Okay. I see you there."

Looks out of the phone booth. It's raining, and it's raining so HARD. looks like it's going to rain all night. A bolt of lightning flashes in the distance. that makes him smile.

---------------------

Eell: "people just like to name things even though they know sometimes they don't need names. Like you."

CORPSE: "What's my name?"

Eell: "CORPSE."

Shoots her in the chest.

---------------------

Eell: "Corpses can't talk."

"You do."

Shoots her in the chest.

----------------------

:"I don't talk. I've never talked to anyone before. I'm a dead body."

Eell: "But you never stop spitting out shit."

Shoots her in the chest. Completely satisfied looks at her corpse, eyes wide open, her eyes, and his.

----------------------

Eell: " [sighs] ...Obsession... Oh, Obsession... [feeling enjoyment] "

Mother: "What?"

Eell_STARING_AT_THE_RAINING_CLOUDS: "Beautiful..."

Mother: "Are you alright?"

Eell_EYES_WIDE_OPEN_STARING_AT_THE_ROAD: "Beautiful... [Sighs] "

---------------------

Mother: "Can you answer me? Are you alright?"

Eell: " [looks at her] Yeah, Just risking everything without knowing the consequences and It-is-how-it-is results."

He can see how dry her lips are, like she didn't drink any water for days.

Bitch: "You've been quiet for twenty minutes, staring at the road."

Eell: "I really wanted to kill that son of a bitch, oh, but he killed the shit out of himself before I do anything. I always hated him and there-"

She freezes, looking at his smirk.

Eell: "Oh, I'm sorry about the killing stuff, It's not that serious. [Stares at the road again] I just love Vivaldi's winter."

---------------------

Eell: "Yes, I know. she's gonna be with me. I, heard she is in some deep shit. yeah. But I want something. ...then let me put it this way. I'm her son, actually her nephew. what's gonna happen is I'm gonna give you the money and we can also kill her. Oh, yeah, [laughs] silly me. we'll talk later then."

Comes out of the phone booth and runs to the car. He is sleepy. But he needs to stay awake.

-----------------

THE_GIRL_ON_THE_BUS: "He was a mess, covered in blood. I think it's my cat you're talking about."

Elizabeth is walking home with her friend,holding a paper bag. It was three hours ago that she left him in the room. He is watching her getting smaller and smaller, and smaller. Smiles.

Eell: "I just watched the thing when it was dying."

THE_GIRL_ON_THE_BUS: "Heartless bastard-"

Eell: "I love it. let's see if somebody gives me 'THAT'... then I'll believe the pow-wer it has. Actually I love being called a heartless bastard. I live with reasons. They live with me."

The bus stops and she disappears without saying a word.

Eell: "Just like that. [puts his hands on her empty seat] Yeah."

Hiccups. And the whole world goes black.

Eell: "Why not?... 'One-day-thing' "

He can hear two teenager girls behind him talking:

VOICE#1: "Not someone who's like me , someone who's... unlike me, but... is interested in me and is not limited..."

VOICE#2: "If you ask me-"

--------------------------------

Eell: "You're not like me. [runs his hands through her formless face] I love that."

Im.girl_WHISPERING: "Of course, I'm not. You made someone to discover and explore with, You didn't want a mirror."

Eell: "Thanks."

They close their eyes laying under that naked tree.

---------------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCpaXu371h

Eell_YELLING_WITH_WIDE_OPEN_RED_EYES_SITTING_ON_A_CHAIR_IN_THE_KITCHEN: "FUCK!! FUCK!! FUUUUCK! FUCK... [looking at the beautifull painting on the wall] FUCK, TH-! ] feels like someone is scratching his brain] -AHHHHH! "602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpMWvGTPj5

He can hear someone knocking on the door. Takes a deep breath and comes out of the kitchen. opens the door. It's an old woman, their neighbor.

She asks: "Is everything OK, Eell? Are you OK? I just heard yo-..."

His right shoulder is shaking. he doesn't want to. closes his eyes and says: "No, Mrs Peyton. Everything is OK. It's nothing. Thanks for being concer-"

His heart is beating so fast. and he's hearing a strange scream of a woman having an orgasm. It gets loud enough to make him close his eyes. He throws up in front of her.

Eell: "I'm really, sorry, about that."

He seems really calm now.

Mrs. Peyton: "Oh We- OK. I'm leaving. I'm if you needed any help.

Eell: "Thanks." and closes the door.

Comes backs to the kitchen. can't find any hammer, but there is a pair of pliers. Grabs it and takes out one of his teeth furiously. The blood, cold and sweet. sweet?

Now he is really calm. he wants to be calm. And thinking of nothing, not worrying about anything, that It didn't happen, again.

Eell: "Yeah. It's the tooth. Lust is not disgusting and love is not sacred as well...! Nothing happened. It was just the tooth... just the tooth... [spits blood] ... yeah..."

BITCH: "Where are you? Come here. There is a lot to do."

He is not calm.

Steps out of kitchen. She sees his blood-covered chin and a pair of pliers in his hand.

BITCH: "Wow. What h-"

Interrupts her.

Eell: "I! tried! to be nice to you, I thought you had some fucking problems back in the dark old DAYS, and now that you DON'T, things are not gonna be the SAME! BUT HERE YOU ARE! You know what you do. You don't have problems. You ARE the problem. [staring at her with an unearthly look] ..."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7siNZ3PBDv

BITCH: " [seems worried] What are you talking about? Come here."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡchO52MZiGg

Eell: "No. [shakes his head] ..."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Qak8DE9pF

BITCH: "Eh, What the fuck is happening here?"

Eell: "It's been a year, but it seems it doesn't work. It doesn't FUCKING work!"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDQtf4wcjG

Spits the blood on the floor.

BITCH: " Eell... [seems frightened] The fuck are you talking about?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXftPgRmZHy

Eell: "I'm not Eell. I'M NOT EELL! It's the last time you FUCKING use that NAME!"

CUNT: "We, we can talk it over, you know. You're mine after all. You're not going anywhere, [smiles and takes a step towards him] then we should jus-"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFVzQl6fjy8

Interrupts her.

#: "Get the FUCK away from me."

"what?" She asks looking at the bloody pliers.

#: "The streams of data that come to my mind are way faster than I can physically attempt to interact with and put them into outer reality to have a consequential effect. You don't want to get hurt, do you?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPmaeJDT5i

CUM_DUMPSTER: "Let's not fight over it."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3xUdHkxD4O

He is fifteen.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwPCBb3SCb
---------------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqLimgAtrDf

Again that dark rainy road,He is driving to the next city. and she is not there anymore.

--------------------------------

THE_GIRL: "Hey, It's me, MS."

Eell: "Oh, MS from that old hollow tree elementary."

MS: "Yeah! Wow, It's been so long! I'm here for a week... [takes a better look at him] Huh, You look like those wise mature men who are ready to marry."

Eell: "Are you married?"

MS: "No."

Eell: "We-"

MS: "Mmm- I, couldn't even dream of it, seeing you again, In a... You're not there anymore. You're living alone, right?"

THE_FEMALE_VOICE_IN_HIS_MEMORY: "You can laugh. Who cares? Just call it immature. that's how you can make them think it's obvious and then, nobody asks why. there is no evil. nothing is childish, nothing is immature. you just, need to take a look. and you'll be able to see things the way they see them. [stops talking to him] Hey, Stevie! don't run home after school. she said you're gonna be in the team. [continues] Oh... the word mature is like respectful. everybody wants to be called that. though they're not completely sure what it is and how it works. but that works for a lot of thin-"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡciVpmKX5Nl

Eell: "Yeah. Oh. Excuse me. So... [smiles kindly] ... wanna drink something? my house is right there. [points to his house, in front of them] What do you think?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvLin0HiF6

MS: "Sure. Of course, I'm gonna shit with your brain. I have a lot of questions."

They're crossing the street and she holds his hand. and looks at him to see his reaction.

He thinks maybe if he didn't kill that guy he could possibly think holding her hand is not alright at this moment. he needed o vanish.

------------------

Miss.Cheew: "Oh, thank God... Hey, Are you alright?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86T4sdWWPW

He is quiet, drowning in his inner reality. he can hear Midori-ko being played in his head . And he is talking to himself, quietly: "I'm not feeling anything. I can kill someone and not feel anything... Oh, what's this pleasure... I just killed a human... Is it instinct... Is it anger... No, It's not... none of them. What's this, thing... Not caring... Not concerning... Like floating in the space... It can't be nothingness... their lives matter, don't they?... Then Why I'm not feeling that way... Like I'm a hollow tree. A naked hollow tree..."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIrSGV8teA

Miss.Cheew: "It was no one's fault... [can't get his attention] Can you hear me? Hey? Say something... Sa- [Eell tries to scream but he can't] -ay- [Actually he doesn't want to scream] -som- [tilts his head and stares at the corpse] -e thing"

Miss.Cheew: "Hey. I'm... can't you really hear me? I'm here. "

He is not shocked. But he knows that everyone expects him to be shocked. He really wants to laugh, but resists.

Th sirens from the police cars can be heard.

He is still resisting. Why is he doing this?

he is twenty.

------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzuhcDvQyh

Mother: "I love you."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvWXOJ6xSv

[midori-ko is playing]

And he is enjoying the music.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUE3WkIwee

Eell: "~I don't~."

Shoots her in the chest.

------------------

Wakes up.

The TV is on. She is there, Sitting on the other side of his bed changing channels. Stares into space, and asks himself: "Why can't I laugh?... Am I amazed?"

MS: "Look. It's about the nature of revolutions, about the mental- [INAUDIBLE] -ike feeling trapped, freedom of speech and oth- [INAUDIBLE] "602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tvwpLd2vj

Eell: "I don't feel sorry for anyone who feels trappe- [INAUDIBLE] "602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMQkhkqDA1y

He believes she's not a phantom.

MS: " [INAUDIBLE] -ow! don't be too far, man. everybody lies."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGzNx7F59ZH

Eell: "freedom of speech?... Com- [INAUDIBLE] -t's not [INAUDIBLE] -derless movement. That's why I'm really interested in nature, There is no sides to take. And humans, It's always about one person trying to plan how, when, and why things should happen. [smiles] "602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNorrFp9JnO

MS: "How are you today?"

And grabs his arm to pull him out of bed.

Eell: "I'm amazed."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrRkJB2XvD

MS: " Why i- [INAUDIBLE]"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVLvTy59zo4

-------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQceb3RC39n

Eell: "You knew where I live, didn't you? It didn't seem like an accident."

MS: "To be honest, Yes, I knew."

Eell: "Why did you try to find me after all of these years?"

MS: "You wanna know?"

Eell: "Yes. I really do."

----------------------

THE_MONSTER_BEHIND_THE_CLOSET: "Psst !!"

----------------------

[Bestiality is playing]

She is collapsed on the floor and he is Smashing her head with a hammer.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQcgoTkrHt

Eell_YELLING_WITH_MADNESS: "I !! [her skull cracks] Found!! [her skull gets destroyed and blood flushes out] The !! ] her brain deforms] HAMMER !! [blood completely covers her head] "

Blood is everywhere. Stops and Looks around. Then locks his eyes on the destroyed skull. He knows this is not about the importance of entertainment.

He whispers: "BLOOD? That's just a word. The more you say it the less- what's that sound...?" 602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYF4ISiA8K

A shadow of a human-like monster runs down the stairs.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIgIrvAF3Au

And he yells: "Who's there ?!! Hey !! How the Fuck did you get out of your room! Come back here you little bitc-"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ731OAER6D2

----------------------

[Summer-Summer Overture is playing]

Eell: "I really do."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvtO2r3fI9

MS: "It's, interesting."

He's starting to believe she can be trusted.

Eell: "You're Linda, aren't you?"

Linda: "You must be Linda, you act like her, you talk like her, the same voice tone. You must be Linda. "

MS: "But I'm not Linda. you know that... you just need a little time to... You know where and when we're talking right now? "

Eell: "Don't do that."

--------------------

Eell_STRANGLING_THE_HUMAN-LIKE_MONSTER: "Why don't you just kill me? it's not fun enough? huh? ...why..."

THE_HUMAN-LIKE_MONSTER_THROWING_UP_BLOOD: "Cause... you're... ~SO~... fun... bitch !"

--------------------

They're both bending over the fence and watching the sunset overlooking the sea.

Eell: "Are you alright?"

MS: " [Smiles in pleasure] never trust beautiful people's mental stability."

Eell: "I'm gonna-"

---------------------

Leo: "You just need a little time, I know. [Suddenly changes his tone and shouts furiously] Who Cares!?"

Eell tears him apart like he was a flag, and finds himself in a new world.

Sen: "You just need a little time, we kno- "

Tears her apart and everything gets gloomy. Her face drowns in the blue background of his mind.

Eell#: "D0-i0n'T b(^%&e con-"

---------------------

Eell: "I'm gonna trust you."

MS: "No one is special. Everybody can be full of shit. you just have to wait for the right moment and they show how similar they are. Not letting you to explain, not trying to understand, cold and distant. how about the law? that invisible switch. People become all wise and trustworthy the day they become 18. dysfunctional."

Eell smiles pleasantly. they both are watching the sunset.

MS: "What would you do if you see her just right now?"

Eell: "Some people do a lot of sick shits out there. I have respect, can't you see? I have manners... I'm doing in control of my mind. I'm no monster. You don't get the 'why is that?' face when you see what I'm doing. One day you lose the urge, that's why you better think of what you're gonna do before you actually do. I try to be reasonable, I think, I make a clear conclusion."

MS smirks and says: "Sure you do. Ha-Ha-Ha."

Eell: "I never asked this. how was your mother like?"

MS: "Give me a second to make up a story... Hmm, OK... She was a mom. She couldn't understand me but at least she was there. she was proud of what she did and I'm proud of who she was. Now I know how your mother was, but... besides that, how was she?"

Eell: "She always looked sad even though she didn't know if I did anything wrong or not. I always felt like I've done something that I can't remember, but then I understood she was not sad, just, annoyed."

MS: "You don't look sad."

Eell: "It's no use."

MS: " [looks at his eyes, reflecting the red red color of the sky] you're so different."

Eell: "Oh, no. all the people who have told me that ended up leaving me."

MS: "Anyway, what do you believe in?"

Eell: "The most harmless one, not to be completely sure. 'harmless', right?"

MS: "Yes, It is. You were always so calm and... cool. Like a nice old man who gives you an advice for free."

He can hear an angel moaning in the sky. Raises his head. There is a hole in the sky. Why is she so calm?

MS: "People have limits."

Eell_WATCHING_THE_HOLE_GETTING_BIGGER_AND_BIGGER: "reading. observing. and watching. lots of fucking possible situations. possible. Just think of something you find, unlikely, and it's already happened."

The hole is big enough to see the other side. he can see the other world through it. And It's just fire. Holy creatures eating human bodies in a garden of fire.

Eell: "I don't even get the -ism thing... Not enough obvious that we even need names for them... And victimizing stuff... [chuckles] Makes them crazy, with chit-chatting! The idea, to make 'em entertained with healing their mental illnesses because they're 'sick'. Words. Words. Words."

[she smiles and gives him a gentle kiss on the cheek]

---------------------

HIS_LAST_FRIEND: "We're gonna move to my grandma's house tomorrow. What are you gonna do?"

Eell: "I'll just forget."

he is six.

---------------------

VOICE A: "It won't take a long time. Can't we just talk to him?"

VOICE B: "HE doesn't want to. Actually..."

VOICE A: "I-It's Okay. Well, Miss.Cheew, If I'm right?"

Miss. Cheew: "Yes."

VOICE A: "Right. Eh... What happened to the.. I mean, the offender?"

Miss. Cheew: "My son killed the offender."

Voice A: "Can you tell me how he used to act before... "

Those familiar brown shoes. she knows them. he is behind the wall, like he's listening to them. Locks her eyes on his shoes.

[he gets interrupted by her]

Miss. Cheew: "He was a normal man, [she is getting nervous] oh, and he 'is' a normal man... [he is not behind the wall anymore] I mean he was kind of a person who doesn't like to talk that much, sticking to his... stuff, all day, didn't tell anything, But I know it was web designing and stuff like that, [after taking some steps stops and stares at them] he seemed to be pretty lonely but I can't say he was depressed or... I mean he was c-cool with it, Mr... "

He is still there. It seems he is listening to them, but he is actually looking somewhere else.

Voice A: "John. John Person."

He takes another step and leaves there.

----------------------

MS: "So?"

Eell: "You're full of shit."

They're walking in the same park.

MS: "Come on..."

Eell: "Trusting you was a fucking mistake."

MS: "It's not gonna make any trouble for us. A lot of people publish their life story."

Eell: [laughing in disbelief] Why would I do that?"

MS:" Well... won't you?... [gives her a confused look] Why?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8BdK4YS9A3

Speeds up and leaves her behind.

Eell: "No. I can't see any reason."

She runs to keep her eye contact with him.

MS: "This is how you treat women?"

Eell: "This how I treat someone who wants me to do something for her without explaining why."602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4LdIYDUAG

-----------------------

MOM: "You're just Six years older than her. You know what a lolita is, don't you? They cut the shit out of their arms and legs. It's FUCKING SICK. You wanna be one of those people who make their own lolita...? The problem is she is not a kid anymore."

Eell: "Shut the FUCK up, you piece of SHIT! I'm leaving here tonight! You are FUCKING insane."

he is twenty.

----------------------------------------------------------------

MS: "I need this shit, can't you see? It's just two phases: remembering and talking. Everyone can re-"

[Suddenly loses his train of thoughts and asks]

Eell: "-Oh, How did you find here? It was Stevie, huh?"

MS: "Well, yeah, we're childhood friends. It couldn't be that hard."

Eell: "So, what are you gonna do?"

MS: "Asking you again?"

Eell: "I don't know. Can't you just forget it?"

MS: "Maybe. But I'll be here for the next six days, anyway."

Eell: "You're enjoying yourself, huh? I'm no good when it comes to entertaining. It must have something to do with eagerness."

MS: "It seems we have a yellow light , here."

AN_ANGEL_FROM_THE_SKY: "I love killing children. It's something I love to do, so I don't understand why God is judging me for that."

--------------------------

EELL: "DON'T!!!"

A hideous monster in the dark is screaming. He can feel the blood coming out of his ears.

Eell: "Don't FUCKING scream!!"

The monster comes out of a dark corner, screaming in a high-pitched voice.

eell: "don't..."

Stops for a second. It looks like a human. It's beautiful and has a content face.

The hall gets darker and It gets closer. It doesn't have a face.

Faceless.Im.girl: "I'm so entertaining."

Opens his eyes and she is not there anymore.

Eell: "You're not."

--------------------------

#: "WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?"

--------------------------

Eell: "You're not a part of my memory."

MS: "It's all about what you want to believe, not what really happened, does it really matter as long as it sells? [giggles] Ah, I'm kidding."

It's cold. The window is open, and moon, shining bright again.

Eell: "I'm sleepy."

MS: "Just close your eyes."

-------------------------

Wakes [WHEN?] up.

Everything is moving backwards in time and he is the only thing can moving forward in time. It makes him amazed. Gets out of his bed. Looks through the window and a bird is flying back to a602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrbiATQJB7
tree.

Eell: "Telling people they're beautiful? What's the fucking point of it? When I say beautiful to a being I wanna have some kind of beneficial interactional experience with that."

MS: "ddo os er'ouy."

Eell: "There's no 'unique' and 'special' [chuckles] person. people are actually all the same, and have the same limited line of thought, animals. Why are people obsessed with the word 'special'... "

Can't understand why she is trying to [WHEN?] everything out.

Eell: "That would be a curse."

Wakes up and [WHEN?] takes a look at his watch says: "I'm not."

-------------------------

He wants to breathe, but his nostrils are closed.

...: "DON'T FUCKING MOVE!"

He can see a new entire world. An endless blue world of blue, a blue world, without the earth, Everything is blue, and he is floating around in the infinite blue. there are some blue creatures602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXywrcC2sTq
eating themselves. They cry blue tears out of their blue eyes and keep eating their blue selves. He dives deeper and finds a place that creatures close their eyes and jump in a dark hole. He dives deeper and everything gets darker and colder. He feels like he is home. Dives deeper and his bones explode. Feels a familiar pain. Takes a look at the bright outer world and finds it interesting that how the same world is much more beautiful from this dark hole. he can't move anymore. but he is going down anyway. Now he can see a new entire world. He suddenly laughs like a grass.

...: "WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?... LICK IT YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT !"

Eell: "Ewovtowveiv-"

...: "-I'M ALMOST FUCKING THERE... DON'T FALL SLEEP NOW..."

He wants to hit something. His body is shaking though he's trying to stay calm. He wants to hit someone. He wants to- He stops thinking and doesn't know why.

He is four.

------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQcBUyoNCW

Eell: "I Fucking hate considering 'odd' and drawing the lines. Maybe you don't mean any peculiar shit by 'THAT' but you sure gotta fucking think about the words you use, right?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmkCifm9qF

MS: "What the, fucK??"

[A kid bites her balloon and shouts: "F-HEY-U-HOW YOU BEEN-U-UUU-YEAH I KNO-UUUU-OH I APPRE-UUUUUUUU-HAT'S SO S-UUCK!!!" ]

Eel_ST*A*RS_l: "That's an interpretation of mindlessly putting words next to each other, mindless of the consequences."

MS: "How can I make you believe me then? Can't you see believe [FAMH'R-EIMZZZ-EIIR-BET-S'MOTHER] what you see?"

Eell: "I don't like it when it's so beautiful on the outside that I can hardly ] the kid is whispering again: "S'MOTHER..." ] believe It's not that beautiful on the inside."

They're next to each other, sitting on a bench in a really quiet park. The sun is beautifully shining upon them and all that green color has a pleasant landscape.

[the kid is whispers in his ear: "S'MOTHER HER..."]

He thinks about the meaning of his used seconds to that moment. There's nothing. No regret. No pride. No memories to laugh at, or cry remembering them. Can't find any. Like everything is602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJa5gv5gRi9
falling down. The world is falling down and he is watching the last beautiful moments of this huge destruction with his eyes, full of colors and shapes. And he suddenly finds out he is the602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKDrY0LwQ4K
God and the whole world is just a plaything that he needed to make some show and whispers: "What are we waiting for? A Meteoroid. It's our last hope. To kill us all...? Yes. [starts listening to her] "

MS: " -ou know what, the words I really like, words like 'sociopath' and 'pervert', every time you look for it in a dictionary you don't find anything seriously unreasonable about them. based on the definition, there's nothing wrong with being a sociopath, once one of my friends told me something that I really felt a warmth in my heart, for a moment, a poisonous hope I think he said: "Not talking to a lot of people, not being social, and being in a world of your own is not at all wrong. And trust me, someday, you'd meet someone who would blow your mind. Maybe you would find someone who would be the perfect foil for you. [raises his hand and feels an extreme heat like he is taking a bath in the hell] The problem with sociopaths is that they do not like being in a crowd, and they do not like small talks. They are interested in talking about things which are larger than life. They do not seem the most attractive people from a distance, [looks at her lips, they don't exist anymore] but when you start talking to them, you realize that they are beautiful individuals on the inside. They'd rather [looks at the sun, it's melting] talk to someone for hours than go to a party. Whoever falls for you, [A huge meteoroid is falling down602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ZsY8VHK0e
and he is both amazed and overjoyed by that scene] would fall for what's on the inside. People tend to [He can't do anything but scream from all the joy and excitement] think that they602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4YojKa5g1
might never find someone who'd be [It's raining veins] perfect for them. But they can be so [the universe is getting sucked into a big nothingness that appeared behind them] wrong. When602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cl329gRAg
you find the one, you'd find the one. [Stands up and Stares at the nothingness] Don't try too hard. Just be yourself. [now the earth is getting sucked into that big dark mirror] Let things fall into place. [they're almost in the nothing, getting spaghettified and he's thinking If there's anyone beyond that mirror] There's surely someone out there for you. [remembers he is a macro object]"

Switches into the universe. Everything is the same. Gives her one of those smiles that you get on your face when you find out something new and tells her in a calm voice: "You're not real. I guess It's enough."

She gets back to the form of the faceless.Im.girl.

[Marian is playing, it's Spanish, or, Portuguese, or maybe a Mexican song, he doesn't know anymore...]602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVF8eR3leKA

Suddenly, he can see it all again, the nothinglessness he has been avoiding all the time, not because he wanted to do something important, because he didn't find anything valuable in it as long as it was just a natural system of life and death that nature has been dealing with for billions of years. and feels nothing again, and thinks again: "why should feeling nothing ridiculously hurt so much? And where's the one who is none of them? Why can a voice be so beautiful and-"

Eell: "As you know, like the first line on the first page of the holy book, Don't let the unprocessed emotions drive you where you feel better at the moment. when you make a choice you must honestly think about it and when you made your decision there's no way back and if you come back nobody welcomes you. Yeah, people make their own choices too. Now... disappear."

Can't see the beautiful sun he was seeing moments before anymore. And green doesn't look refreshing.

Watches the sky while she is disappearing slowly and tells her: "Sometimes I get a feeling I'm enjoying and [a teardrop falls off his face] the next moment I lose it to a loose thought, I try to get that feeling of joy back, Sometimes I succeed which leads to the next losing-again and Sometimes, I don't."

Gives him a kiss on the corner of his left eye as she completely disappears. He saves that moment in his memories as a holy moment. Starts humming and sings calmly: "And slowly you come to realize..."

--------------------------------------------602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqClVgIjTgQ

It's still raining. It feels like 'night'. The sun is still up there though.

A single mother, is sitting on the front seat and talking to him. She is about forty. He is both listening and not listening to her at the same time. He is both both and not both and he is both thinking about and not thinking about anything and he continues and finds out words are losing their meaning. Stops. She is done talking. Takes another look at her.

Eell: "Are you american?"

Single Mom: "Do I look like Spanish or something?"

Eell: " [Smiles] No, you don't. Huh huh. [laughs] I don't believe that. Or do I?"602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEi7Imtnw0

Single mom: "Ha-ha-ha-ha."

He can see the raindrops falling on the windows in a way that he never saw before. It's unnatural. Sure it must be just about extreme concentration, he assumes.

Eell: "Hah. Well... Do you live nearby?"

A voice is talking to him: "If you needed anything come to me." It's just an internal conversation. and he answers: "I know, pal."

Single Mom: "No, It's a motel. Just the next... Oh...hmmmm, there! can you see that? [points to a big old building hiding in that forest] "

Eell: "Sure. It's... huh, a motel. [smiles again] "

He remembers something and his smiles widens.

Single Mom: "You got a thing for motels? Phobia or something?"

Eell: "When I was a kid I was verbomaniac, cause I always felt like I need to talk to someone about many things. I hate words now. Time changes everything. or does it? Words are imperfect for this slightly complicated topic. Then let's skip it."

Stops in front of the motel. that familiar motel.

Single mom: "Well, Thanks for the ride uh [waits to hear a name from him] ..."

Eell: " 'The guy'...?"

Single Mom: " [laughs] OK. Goodbye!"

As she leaves the car, he gets back to driving on this endless road.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Sen: "Why don't you tear me apart to get me out of your personal reality?"

His eyes explore that white naked body like they want to suck the skin and burn the flesh. A huge amount of blood appears behind her and it's gonna fill the room. But he doesn't want to. Points towards it and it stops.

Eell: " [looks so calm] No need for violence. Killing would be enough."

-------------------------------------------------------------------

VOICE: "What's up?"

Eell: "Now is not the time."

VOICE: "What do you mean by 'THAT'?"

Eell: "Don't ask the same question over and over again. I mean you're FUCKING me over. Finish it you annoying piece of SHIT !"

VOICE: "You have a strange way of entertaining yourself."

Eell: "I Know right?"

--------------------------------------------------------------------

He is still driving, and the rain is getting heavier. The sky is completely dark.

Eell#THE#INSIDE: "Death... A lot of people are thinking about it right now. They think about it so many times. They try to imagine the pain of not existing anymore in the last moment of their existence. Some try to be ready, Some try to guess what happens next. But they all know that they're gonna die, and they don't know when, where and how, but the real question seems to be 'why'. I never killed anyone in my life. I tried to be nice. And life is life and. nice be to tried I. Life my in anyone killed never I-"

-------------------------------------------------------------------

[Action, by Taniuchi Hideki is playing, seems remembering this one was not that hard]

Eell is crossing the street. finds MS swinging her hand for him in the park. She is sitting on a bench and nobody's around.

[Action stops playing and now Taikutsu is playing]

Eell: "what's up? [chuckles] "

MS: "I know It's an odd question but, [pauses for a moment] are you honest with me?"

Eell: "Well, I'll never tell you what's in my mind cause it's totally unnessacry. I just give you a possibly believable output. you don't want to know as well."

MS: "Ok... The reason I told you to come here today is I think it's en-"

--------------------------------------------------------------------

[Taikutsu is still playing]

Linda: "Enough of dreams... Just... Empty your mind, and feel my skin, you can feel the blood flowing in my veins... I'm breathing, you can hear it."

Eell: "I can..."

They're walking in a meadow. There is nobody else there.

You can see Eell floating in the air while she is talking to him. he is remembering. That's why he's sane, you think. he teleports to another place, close enough to her. And she is still talking to him sitting on a rock.

You look at him, and recognize his face. You try to call him and when you see that he might not hear you, you run to catch him and grab his shirt. Takes a look at you. He is not surprised to see you there. Turns around and says to you: "Hey, you little piece of imagination. how you doin'?"

You don't answer. Cause you know what happens next. She is still talking and the memory is being shown.

Eell: "Let me finish it, pal. Just imagine."

He is in a gas station, watching the moon in the front mirror. it's still raining hard.

He can hear police sirens.

It doesn't take so much time that a police car stops in front of his car. Two cops are looking at him and talking to each other. one of them gets out of the car.

He gets out of the car too.

And after a couple of seconds tells them: "I'm the guy you're looking for. To be honest, 'I' did it, the whole thing."

They don't look so friendly.

His shotgun is under the seat. slowly takes it out and closes the car door.

They both raise their gun and at that moment. Eell checks the bald guy, he is not aiming yet. Then he shoots the guy with glasses and runs away.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQRrHRKeaY

Runs to a dark path in the forest.

While he's running from the bald guy, remembers a little piece of information about Leo. he had just one eye, the left one. and he thought he had both of his eyes. It's getting confusing.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBO6qWzzSLH
what is happening? why is he feeling like this? it's like a monster is giving birth to her baby in his body.

He is drowning in the possibilities and running in the dark. He can see his brain coming out of his skull and blood gushing out of his mouth, falling on the ground.

[NO MUSIC]

He gets shot.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTN0JviQ27p

His gun drops on the ground. The officer gets closer, aims the gun at him and shouts: "DON'T MOVE!" and he closes his eyes.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtkT45ryCeH

He's shot in the chest.

Eell: " [he was experiencing the last moments of his life and was not scared. but had a feeling of ultimate loneliness] WHAT'S THE POINT OF THIS MIRACLE SHOW? THAT I AM NOT DEAD BUT... [EXHALING DEEPLY] I KNOW... I UNDERSTAND... JUST, I DON'T GET IT... [BREATHING HEAVILY] WHY? HUH? WHY AM I BEING HONEST, NOW, AND WITH YOU, THE ONE WHO DOESN'T KNOW ME. [EXHALING] NO, P-LEASE... NOT NOW THAT I FOUND SOMEONE TO BE HONEST WITH... LET ME TALK A FE-... "602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWlzI7L6NU

[HE IS DEAD WITH HIS EYES OPEN]

Eell: "See? ridiculous, huh? It just can't be. [gives you a really happy smile] "

You nod and leave him. The memory ends.

[Malena is playing]

He is looking at the dark dark forest. It's not that long to the city. he remembers one of those stories that He and Linda read together.

Linda'S_VOICE: "The little girl deep down wants to have her birthday party, the ex-wife really wants to drink a coffee and watch a TV show alone in a quiet room, and nobody gives a shit that H just died, being a killer aside. That was sad if you ask me. though it didn't make me sad. I didn't give a shit either. H never belonged to the history. That's why they chose H to be design humans' nightmares. H was sent back to the moment of creating humans and was given the ability to modify the structure of humans' nightmares, but H was not allowed to remove them. H cleared all the nightmares to let humans have sweet dreams every night even if their life isn't sweet. H got punished and H' punishment was to be trapped in the humans' nightmares forever."

------------------------------------------------

Eell: "No. I just wanna see Linda. I know he adopted her."

he is sixteen.

------------------------------------------------

[Malena is still playing]

He is wearing a yellow hat.

Eell: "Thanks to you I don't believe in God anymore. [staring at her without batting an eye] Cause I came to realize that sometimes in your life, you choose, to do something and you find out how many possibilities are nearly impossible to notice [his eyes are still locked on her] And you never let them to make the incomplete picture of what you're interacting with, in your mind. And good feeling don't Last forever. Thank you, for showing me the reality of being a physically-limited human. Thank you, for rejecting me because I was full of imaginations, [chuckles] and hope. Thank you, for not believing in me when I was happy to death. [he looks happy but she doesn't feel that way] "

Elizabeth is freaked out. leaves him and starts taking a number with her phone. And he gets lost in the crowd the moment she leaves the bridge. She wonders what he was talking about.

-----------------------------------------------

#:"SCream!"

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[Cannibal Holocaust is playing]

He is walking in the park. Clouds are seeking his attention with their random moves. It’s raining and he needs a hat, he thinks.

Eell_READING_THE_TITLE_OF_A_NEWSPAPER_ON_A_BENCH_WHILE_WALKING_HIS_WAY: “Why do you think we can’t have peace in the world”

Eell: “Cause we’re just fucking animals? Assuming we’re special and different gives the idea that ′hey! how to live in peace? ′ and animals have instincts and chemical emotions which sometimes lead them to harm another and without them they may turn into hyper-rational beings that still have the option to harm another to achieve the satisfactory level.” Maybe this. It’s an interesting possibility.”602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6b3mGcN473

Looks somewhere else. And continues.

Eell: ” [his voice is calm] And about that, Not remembering is the same as fucking madness. You now, coming over, neglect and sanity, are definitions that change like everything else, Wait and Someday you’ll see no interactional activity is banned anymore. And everything acceptable... And everything possible. Dangerous though, just like how the nature work.”602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOZkvnFrJP

He stops in front of a blue flower in the garden, like he is observing a fascinating species. Sits on the edge and touches the flower.

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[misa-no-theme-b is playing]

Eell_TALKING_TO_HIMSELF: “She looks like an angel. I hate angels. [smirks] It’s time to kill. being stoic? that’s one of the keys. being contrary? can’t say it’s not if you do it right! now there’s a lot of reasons.”602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIhKUqqNY8

He has no umbrella. He, is enjoying the raindrops. The coldness.

-------------------------------------------------------

:“Should I shoot myself, or her? It’s obvious.”

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[Un amico is playing]

He is Smelling the blood on his fingers and dreaming about some memories. And he whispers : “I never get tired of this... It’s music to my ears...Huuuuh... I LOVE IT! just for sake of love, let’s kill forever.”

The old man thinks he is sure insane. Cause he is not making any sense.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sLYO1wkMZ

[laughs enjoying himself]602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPaLNUfFRVB

Looks at her face, at the corpse: “Hate? [shouts] Irrelevant!! [rubs the blood over her cheeks and lips] Misanthropic... How much of people’s time is wasted to name everything?”602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhPB8R8tsG

The raindrops are falling and screaming out loud. He kneels down on one knee and gets closer to her. Then he stares at that face for a minute.602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jpY3cGyXG

--------------------------------------------------------

[Nier automata starts playing]

He is standing front a shop window full of hats. blue hats. red hats. green hats. purple hats. All kind of so-called attractive colors. Behind that glass, all of them look like old antiques of a person who’s already dead for centuries.

---------------------------------------------------------

[continues]

They’re in the motel.

She finally woke up and got off the couch. She is in the kitchen now. he can’t see her. but she is talking to him: “I never could get pregnant. that’s why my husband found another bitch. that’s why I bought a dog. Eell is a secret name for my personal dog, Actually let’s assume it means Sen’s personal dog . how about that? But you must call me Mom. Hmm. like it? you know why, right? All of this humiliation ... I didn’t adopt you, I bought you.”

She doesn’t say anything more.

he is four.

And *it’s night*

It’s, midnight. He is in his bed staring at the ceiling. Suddenly throws up on his shirt. Looks at the vomit. Bites his tongue and tastes his blood.

Holds his ears and quietly screams. his eyes are being crushed in his skull and his brain is coming out of his nose. but it’s not happening.

Eell: “No. Eell doesn’t mean that, [tries to think of another thing, anything] It! It means, someone who just needs a person to be honest with. No, no, no, no. I-It means some... someone who, someone who just needs a person to be honest with. It doesn’t mean that. It means someone who just needs a person to be honest with.”

he is four.

And *It’s still night*.

It’s quiet. So quiet. Most of those hats look just the same. It’s a little hard to choose one. For a moment, looks at the past and he doesn’t feel anything about it, No regret, No pride.

[For the love of life is playing]

A yellow hat. finds it interesting. The raindrops are rolling down his face.

#: “And slowly you come to realize...”

A teardrop rolls down his face.

Talks to the shop window: “how does it feel?” He knows it doesn’t feel anything.

#: “It’s all as it should be... you can only do so much...”

--------------------------------------------

[For the love of life is still playing]

A huge abnormal cloud is appearing in the sky. He is walking all the way back to his car in the rain wearing that yellow hat. He wants to, or he doesn’t want to do that? for what? You can’t do anything without coming back to nothing. Everything begins and everything ends.

--------------------------------------------

[F or the love of life is still playing]

He is paying the man behind the counter. Why do I find this rain so beautiful? Normally, I just don’t care... he thinks.

VOICE_NULL: “I like how simple humans are, But how complicated they seem to be. We have these ideals of perfection... We tend to see the flaws without even looking at what’s really behind the picture. But none of it applies to that bitch.”

He can hear the angels crying. they’re all dying and falling from the sky. It’s raining dead angels.

THE_MAN_BEHIND_THE_COUNTER: “OK. You want your name on it. [nods] What was your name again?”

He looks at the dead angels’ corpses outside the shop, scratching his hand, and answers: “Michael Stone.”

[F or the love of life keeps on playing]

#: " If you’re game enough602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1GD0nZG4Sj
You could place your trust in me602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXEVpkHGuC
For the love of life602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJ3fkqNotF
There’s a trade off602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYkRzwbBZB
We could lose it all602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcEwxjoSOM
But we’ll go down fighting602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUXvGqPHWJ
And what of the children...?602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhyDGVOtJK0
Surely they can’t be blamed602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1QPhooLsJX
For our mistakes?602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuY3HeCpmA
And slowly, I’ve come to realize602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnuDIn6a7FU
It’s all as it should be602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJA9mN6oL1R
That hiding space602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbSLjtRLoTp
A lonely place602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡebFNtnn5NE
How can the right thing be so wrong?602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Iof99KghJ
I’ve found mistakes602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDLhIhXikIQ
Where they don’t belong602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwXvYv8AJH
For the love of life602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1YItZptEJ
We’ll defeat this602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtdI38ncp1
They may tear us down602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDXyj7sZ2a
But we’ll go down fighting602Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgM9lYqYE08
Won’t we?"

ns 15.158.61.8da2

Chapter three: Name

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