文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/
阿澄常常緊握手機。不論苦悶的上班時間、在家中獨處、抑或外出與朋友聚會,每隔幾分鐘,她都會不經意地掃一掃屏幕,去看看有沒有新的信息是由通訊apps那裡發出。如果有,通常阿澄都會忍不住馬上打開通訊apps。儘管她也不想自己這麼在乎,好笨。如果一天過後她都沒有收到任何信息,那就像是等待了兩天的六合彩攪珠出了,結果卻落空了般的感覺。518Please respect copyright.PENANASsYcQPH8ks
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「唉,人愈大朋友真的愈來愈少。舊朋友漸漸疏遠,現在身邊日對夜對的就只有同事和公司的文件,有時想找朋友聊天,卻不知如何是好。」阿澄在家中邊慢慢的啜飲著凍檸茶、邊在某個好友群組send了這此post。518Please respect copyright.PENANAX1DR24cYDZ
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那個交友群組裡只有六個組員,全是陌生人,彼此都不認識對方,沒有profile picture,沒有真名,是由一個討論區網友們建議延伸出來的群組。大家都是陌生人,卻令大家更安心地、沒有負擔的坦誠真話,比起天天相見的家人、朋友、身邊伴侶,這group的人在群組裡更是親密地交流。518Please respect copyright.PENANAoPhKUJTZYK
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不用一分鐘已有人回應,名叫「芯」的人回post:「是的。就算是男朋友,天天見面、拖手、接吻,我還是覺得自己與他的距離很遠,有時候,我會逃避不想見到他。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAWYouo7oFrN
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阿澄想起她的一個好友——阿綠。她們是舊同學,有著一樣的夢想、一樣的思路,曾經她們無話不說。可惜出來社會後,很現實的,友情已被現實沖淡,因為生活圈子不一、話題不一、夢想不一了。阿澄仍然很努力堅持夢想,但阿綠交了男朋友後,夢想已變成了是「結婚」,男朋友是惟一的天空,再沒動力做其他事了。每次她們見面,阿綠的話題就只有愛情,每次她都會給阿澄看很多她和男朋友的甜蜜合照。518Please respect copyright.PENANAuE1iuwqP82
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阿澄當然明白這改變是成長過程。518Please respect copyright.PENANAUVfenA2FOO
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group中有另一人回了芯,她名叫may:「妳不愛他了。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAKRN6ZjG1Py
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芯回應:「愛。但同時厭惡。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAfPJOGZyQTf
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平時很少回應別人,只愛說自己事的阿然簡短回了:「好矛盾。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAKTxg2bj85y
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may:「嗯。不過不要緊,只少做女人有份工作能養活自己就好了,獨立一點就天不怕地不怕。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAxXir9lM7CE
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阿澄沒有回應,其他人也是已讀不回。但過了三分鐘左右,may繼續說:「不過說真的,雖然我在大型廣告公司公司工作,好像有很好的前景,但這只是外表風光而已。我晚晚OT、連自由的時間都沒有,上司性格差勁,只懂以階級壓人。客人又好麻煩,我天天給客人罵……但我怎跟人說這些事實?大家都是一直羨慕著我的啊。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAItxjvSFl46
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阿澄放下凍檸茶,開始打字:「可能是妳運氣差,遇了一間差勁的公司。我有朋友也是廣告界的,她說她的工作環境超好,福利很好,同事又相處融洽,完全是一份好工作。」518Please respect copyright.PENANA7zuqVjiDmX
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阿澄還記得她的廣告界朋友——gigi派咭片給她們這些舊同學的嘴臉有多囂張,當時她有多強調她公司的派頭有多大。518Please respect copyright.PENANA0yTTtoMGaE
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阿澄忽然很想約阿綠和gigi出來吃飯。她鼓起勇氣send了信息給她們:「hi,找天出來吃飯好嗎?」518Please respect copyright.PENANA3rxYH65XP1
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很快的,阿澄得到她預期中的回覆。518Please respect copyright.PENANAieKWV6lmpa
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阿綠:「啊,好呀,但我這三天都約了男朋友,約下星期好嗎?不過也要看看我男朋友的時間」518Please respect copyright.PENANAEgcZqVHzcq
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gigi:「不了,最近我都要開會,這是一筆大生意,我超期待的。妳要知道,我的公司派頭太大了,不容有失。」518Please respect copyright.PENANA8yhqGoT1nl
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阿澄失落地回:「不要緊。再約。」但她知道並不一定會有「下次」。518Please respect copyright.PENANAP1x26gJM7k
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轉過頭,阿澄在group中說:「好難約朋友出來。大家都不一樣了。」518Please respect copyright.PENANA34ddrLYeed
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芯:「是。有時是想見,但不敢見,或是沒動力去見面。因為要裝上一切安好的臉具,好累。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAdd3XVC2spc
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may:「唉。人長大後不會像以前單純了,待在常常給比較的社會中,人會改變的。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAV77xhCmGmS
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阿澄忽然覺得好累。她想上床窩在被子裡打開電腦看推理日劇。她不想再待在現實中了。518Please respect copyright.PENANAk2DdY2gcvU
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阿澄:「我去看日劇了。再見,明天有空再聊。」518Please respect copyright.PENANAEJxaDYo0N1
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芯:「好,我也睡了,好累,bye~」518Please respect copyright.PENANAQPr9QxfY9h
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may:「byebye!剛好我也要睡了,我們蠻有默契的嘛,哈。」518Please respect copyright.PENANApE6qeQar53
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同一時間,阿澄、阿綠和gigi關上睡房的橘子色燈光。這點她們還蠻有默契的。518Please respect copyright.PENANAXL1JbyMujv
文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/518Please respect copyright.PENANAbGa0c37P1u
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