dear infinity,
it hurt me at first. crushed me even, or quite close to it. i guess i just didn't bother believing in all those rumors because that's all rumors tend to be—rumors. talk doesn't mean anything if there's no substance—no action—behind it.
this time, however, those rumors held a grain of truth. you did go on a date with that one boy—whose name, frankly, i haven't bothered to learn. (i do feel a little bad, but i'm quite satisfied with the friends i already have.) however, it was one date, and in this world, one date doesn't amount to much if there aren't two or three or four more following it.
but you did go on that date. i don't know if there were any others after, but i know you went on a date with what's-his-name. i saw you both, laughing together next to your locker like you were the only two who mattered in the world.
nevermind that you and i had agreed to go to your house and do homework together. nevermind that you and i are supposed to be closer friends than this random boy you went on a date with a week ago. nevermind the crushed feeling in my chest, the blood rushing to my head, the way i saw red.
nevermind the friendship i thought we'd been building up for some weeks now.
but then you saw me. you looked right into my eyes and saw me. and you smiled. and then you waved. and it was like the world was right again, and i could finally breathe. you told him goodbye and hurried to my side as if that was your only purpose in life.
for a brief moment, i wondered if it was. if you and i are meant to be together, to stand side by side, to walk hand in hand for all of eternity. for the entirety of one of your namesakes.
but brief that moment was because the first thing you did was apologize to me for taking so long, giving the excuse that you were just scheduling another date with him. in that solitary moment, i felt my walls crumble and my bridges burn and my whole world fall into a black hole, but i did my best not to let it show because you didn't deserve to see that, because you didn't deserve to see anything but the good that you naturally emanated from your soul.
so i suffered in silence because it made you happy.
sincerely,807Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxB4wgtmlKI
beyond
