自動門打開的叮咚聲響起,他來了。曉玲看到他的時候,心臟開始不受控制的猛加速。316Please respect copyright.PENANAOzH4cvelpA
316Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6l62KTMqC
第一次注意到他時曉玲就喜歡上他了,只因為那時他在每個人都回家團圓不會跑到便利商店的新年夜出現,對沒有家人可以一起團聚過年夜的曉玲說了句新年快樂。316Please respect copyright.PENANA4wLkwOu3pv
316Please respect copyright.PENANAwsJVTRCjGP
啊,這個人一定是命中注定能跟我成為一家人的人吧。即使從小就在社會中打滾許久,對感情這種事看多的曉玲沒想到自己既然也會有對某個人著迷不已的一天。原本只打算做個兩個月就離開準備出國的曉玲也為了繼續和他見面,一待就是半年。316Please respect copyright.PENANADmm2BZvHtp
316Please respect copyright.PENANAn7pZIMoqbn
到底該怎麼做才能告訴他自己的感受呢?曉玲在這半年來一直不停地在內心掙扎著,每次總以為有機會可以跟他聊聊卻老是因為時機不湊巧而錯過。但這也沒辦法,想在7-Eleven這種消費者流動率高的超商,要跟特定人士有時間且有機會自然地談話是很困難的。316Please respect copyright.PENANA51EuURz87n
316Please respect copyright.PENANAwzADrHAvoY
回想過去不斷搭訕失敗的教訓,曉玲最後發現只有擬出最華麗最純情的告白大作戰計劃,才能讓他把注意力放在自己身上。為此曉玲花了不少功夫在事前準備上,比如偷拍他的照片拿來作告白練習,詳細紀錄他來買東西的時間還有週期,以及他每次來都買些什麼,跟什麼人來,跟其他人來時閒聊的話語。316Please respect copyright.PENANA2LxFaGwVZX
316Please respect copyright.PENANAG5alQgZPri
從這些收集而來的情報,曉玲知道他目前單身(這很重要),是個大三學生,讀的是工程系,還有他跟其他三個男生同住在外面,喜歡吃巧克力,最愛買的是7-Eleven的大亨堡夾原味熱狗大亨。此外,曉玲還知道他在期中期末考的時候為了開夜車讀書,大多會在十點左右,也就是晚班快結束的時候出現。曉玲甚至還打聽到他喜歡的女孩類型,果然跟曉玲想的一樣,他好像比較喜歡純情的女孩。316Please respect copyright.PENANAYtnnRJwcMv
316Please respect copyright.PENANAIhzzazDaEz
如果這樣的話,那麼在7-Eleven告白就行不通了。所以曉玲決定先跟他成為朋友再說。要先成為朋友,當然就得多跟他聊聊。知道他在期中期末考期間十點左右會出現,這時候通常會來的客人都不多,可以有很多聊天的機會。為此曉玲甚至跟同事換班,把那週全調成晚班。316Please respect copyright.PENANA4xCKfPUeDe
316Please respect copyright.PENANAOPTzuWY8IZ
是時候了,曉玲心中響起命運交響曲的旋律。因為他的出現而陷入回想的曉玲的心好像跳著華爾滋的小羊般,那麼地充滿無意義的花朵與圈圈。曉玲告訴自己一定要成功跟他聊聊,今天一定要有好的開始。316Please respect copyright.PENANAHG7cTiMX5D
316Please respect copyright.PENANAEQTWEsefme
「小姐…」在櫃檯前的男子叫道:「小姐我要結帳!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAI8CC7GYFoK
316Please respect copyright.PENANAQIIRnNXQ4G
「啊?」在發呆的曉玲被嚇到,慌張地說:「好…好的。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAHlHaUMDBN9
316Please respect copyright.PENANAREI2FIUmlW
說完,曉玲馬上拿起條碼掃描器將男子的東西全掃進去。接著曉玲將要找的零錢跟統一發票交給男子,男子拿了就走,於是這間7-Eleven裡面就只剩下四個人。316Please respect copyright.PENANAnMhXIMpagS
316Please respect copyright.PENANAchEfzgcCxr
一個老太太正在猶豫著自己是要買國民便當還是御便當,還是御飯團或者真飽系列便當。一名看來剛下班的OL正站在健美生活館專櫃前,不知道想買哪一種健康飲品。一名中年男子正站在門口的報紙櫃前偷看著報紙,而且顯然不打算買。然後是曉玲心中的那個他,此時他正在後面的飲料冰櫃前徘徊,偶爾還會打開冰櫃門。316Please respect copyright.PENANAyNKLiPerN1
316Please respect copyright.PENANAqrOZpS0zU2
【註1─OL:316Please respect copyright.PENANAg5yTAKWFVv
316Please respect copyright.PENANAnp3hhrh9sY
一、Old Latin(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAMHwubklDne
古拉丁語,很難學…316Please respect copyright.PENANAJRoEVs5tsk
316Please respect copyright.PENANAmdMDl3EZjS
二、Office Lady(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAMVt4DScvNn
女上班族,通常可以引起很多男人的遐想。 】316Please respect copyright.PENANARHgQbe621S
316Please respect copyright.PENANAXSeKTCzFXM
其他人趕快滾蛋吧,曉玲打從心底詛咒那些妨礙他人戀情的人怎麼不會被馬當場踢死。她在心底哀怨地嘆著氣,祈求老天爺讓曉玲心中的他能留越久越好。316Please respect copyright.PENANAR5eCrmNgCe
316Please respect copyright.PENANAZKVQ4DuzBz
「小姐喔~」老太太開口了「請問一下。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAlwDqxLgKSN
316Please respect copyright.PENANAv8WzgcA0SC
雖然心底咒罵著這些人趕快滾蛋,但是曉玲還是掛著一張笑臉走過去,說:316Please respect copyright.PENANA3zjf4KLGgG
316Please respect copyright.PENANAkwo2zMzw8C
「老奶奶,怎麼了嗎?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAhxEFgtuQlY
316Please respect copyright.PENANAzcXyGbycCw
「啊就是喔,我想說這些便當拿回去用電鍋加熱,可不可以啊?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAjniI3Jhdpu
316Please respect copyright.PENANAs2wkfph3gw
用電鍋加熱?這個問題當場問倒了曉玲,因為她只知道超商的便當可以用微波爐加熱,卻不知道能不能用電鍋加熱。316Please respect copyright.PENANA9O5XWEssAW
316Please respect copyright.PENANAc8Gb9YlYdJ
「嗯…為什麼要這樣問?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAjBGGR5dspL
316Please respect copyright.PENANAJVXA5udQxV
「啊就我孫子要我來幫他買什麼真飽黑胡椒雞排便當,可是我又不敢用微波爐加熱,聽說那個不是會有輻射嗎?我怕加熱了便當會產生有毒物質啥的,就想說能不能改成用電鍋加熱。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAVo5x2djFM4
316Please respect copyright.PENANA1IUUQPpxTa
用微波爐加熱的輻射會造成有毒物質?曉玲聽了差點沒昏頭,這是什麼怪道理竟然可以這樣解釋。雖然曉玲覺得心中理智的線快要斷掉,因為曉玲得趕快找機會跟曉玲心中的他聊天,根本沒時間處理這種蠢問題。316Please respect copyright.PENANAZGYsKTFdHK
316Please respect copyright.PENANAYEsQJuIvms
「嗯…老奶奶,其實用微波爐是不會產生有毒物質的。」曉玲試圖跟那位老太太解釋「不過用電鍋煮應該也可以,只是記得要把外包裝給拿掉裝在碗裡面才行。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAHEKsSRYJAo
316Please respect copyright.PENANAGUbYW1VnJ0
「啊你怎麼知道用微波爐不會有毒了?」老太太突然發起脾氣來「說起你們這些年輕人喔,每次都只會敷衍我們這些老人家,像我孫子每次都不跟我好好聊聊,實在是有夠不孝的。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAUfQN1jdEn3
316Please respect copyright.PENANAJtaeOw8DUk
「不…不是啦。」曉玲急忙道歉,但是心裡卻千萬咒罵「這是真的阿,不然你看怎麼那麼多人吃都沒發生過事情?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAoc0RBhG4I6
316Please respect copyright.PENANA5CBTjJcNOD
「齁…又想騙我了,新聞每天都在報什麼黑心香腸,黑心豬肉,黑心麻糬黑心芭樂黑金剛蓮霧的。那些商人還不都是只想騙我們的錢!要不是阿扁凍蒜當上總統!@#……」316Please respect copyright.PENANAB5THgYRI6o
316Please respect copyright.PENANAan3JwYz22C
老太太莫名其妙地開始扯起政治經,讓曉玲聽得是氣到好像頭上就要冒出一座火山開始大量噴火。曉玲心想誰當總統干她什麼事,現在她只想要跟心中的他好好聊聊其他怎樣誰都不管。316Please respect copyright.PENANA6bHicE6cDF
316Please respect copyright.PENANA0Qpq0tvgn5
但是為了在曉玲心中的他面前維持自己溫柔的良好形象,曉玲也只好微笑賠不是,說:316Please respect copyright.PENANAM362XYEbJc
316Please respect copyright.PENANAD5diNVA0sj
「老…老奶奶對不起啦,您說的都對。用微波爐的確是會產生有害物質,我想您孫子一定很餓了,再不買回去他一定會餓到昏頭的。所以您要真飽黑胡椒雞排便當是吧?我馬上幫您結帳,好讓您能拿回去用電鍋煮。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAsYcUStXdJu
316Please respect copyright.PENANAXz3ZnLp0n6
因為曉玲良好的態度,老太太也就氣消了,可是沒想到老太太竟然又提了個更過分的要求。316Please respect copyright.PENANANh3BoF2t06
316Please respect copyright.PENANArl39O2Np2o
「好啦好啦…」只見老太太一臉不知道自己這樣問是很過分的表情「那你們有沒有提供電鍋煮便當?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAJCTsLWgh6T
316Please respect copyright.PENANA2gAoqYTkib
這個問題實在是太過分了,曉玲的嘴角微微一崩,但是馬上回復原來十分和氣溫柔的微笑,說:316Please respect copyright.PENANAzPDPcZWIyd
316Please respect copyright.PENANAu9P7ytkHal
「很抱歉喔老奶奶,我們這邊沒有電鍋可以煮便當呢…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAdZyaOq8h1L
316Please respect copyright.PENANAiJBPAHwPHE
「沒有?」老太太火氣又起,失聲叫道:「那那是啥!?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAOHS2aEFL9q
316Please respect copyright.PENANATfZg0YNLLr
說完,老太太指著煮茶葉蛋的電鍋。316Please respect copyright.PENANAvB9pEWeNs1
316Please respect copyright.PENANAsqEeGOYqaW
這時曉玲內心的OS開始不停地狂喊天啊天啊天啊天啊~~~且她的內心湧現出不小的殺意。316Please respect copyright.PENANASgik3QGJKy
316Please respect copyright.PENANAKSCbDPD6jx
【註2─OS:316Please respect copyright.PENANA6Znub0VUV8
一、Operation System(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAhLTWLlA9xo
作業系統,沒這個電腦就跑不動。316Please respect copyright.PENANApqK98UFMEt
316Please respect copyright.PENANA1uvgBOYDAk
二、Over Soul(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAPZdSj92GfR
在靈魂之上的東西,通常指人的表層意識,或人當下的想法。】316Please respect copyright.PENANAo240bplRgB
316Please respect copyright.PENANAtlgwKOI94o
「老太太,妳這樣要求未免也太過分了吧?」316Please respect copyright.PENANABw6MJZJw84
316Please respect copyright.PENANAe2OXfOWH5f
突然間曉玲好像聽到某個不是自己的聲音所發出,雖然聽來太過文雅但是的確是自己最想講的話。她轉頭一看,原來是剛剛那位在健美生活館前面挑東西的OL小姐。316Please respect copyright.PENANA918u0tG1hV
316Please respect copyright.PENANAED1WzDdj84
「沒知識也要有常識,妳沒看那個是煮茶葉蛋的,用那個電鍋煮出來的便當全都是茶葉蛋的味道,這樣你的孫子怎麼可能吃得下去?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAsN86U9fkcX
316Please respect copyright.PENANAGfQchuxnEM
不對吧…似乎有哪裡不對勁。雖然曉玲打從心底感謝OL小姐的仗義直言,但是她總覺得OL小姐的話不知道在哪裡就斷掉了一條線的樣子。316Please respect copyright.PENANAFlUuKkHkr9
316Please respect copyright.PENANAdsLSuw58Zx
「啊…對…對喔,歹勢歹勢…真的用這電鍋煮的話真的會全是茶葉的味道。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAf8ps53Rjn5
316Please respect copyright.PENANAZ13ek9TMxD
老太太就像是突然想通那樣啥問題都沒了,只是拿了一個真飽黑胡椒雞排便當跟福隆便當到櫃檯結帳。曉玲這時總算能鬆口氣,她轉頭一看,那位她心中的他還在擺泡麵的架子前摸索,看來短時間還不會走的樣子。316Please respect copyright.PENANA6Y8mFluFON
316Please respect copyright.PENANAMd3s1i7JnR
接著曉玲馬上走到櫃檯前,已超快的速度把老太太買的便當結帳處理好。雖然那個老太太在走出自動門前還在跟曉玲道歉,說自己老人家一個很少來這種年輕人才會來的便利商店才會那麼囉唆的那碎碎念已足以讓曉玲的理智再斷線一次,但是念在老太太已經要走的份上,曉玲還是以微笑目送著老太太慢慢踏出自動門。316Please respect copyright.PENANA4P1qgLfDLW
316Please respect copyright.PENANACMnm6tV38d
等老太太離開後,曉玲轉頭看向OL小姐,說:316Please respect copyright.PENANAQOLKImSKrz
316Please respect copyright.PENANAwJNEIV9p6I
「謝謝妳喔…要不是妳我真的不知道該怎麼辦。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAFz1Ofl2IJB
316Please respect copyright.PENANAKA7SZPhpYH
「啊哈哈,這沒什麼啦。」OL小姐咧嘴瞇眼不好意思地笑道:「我以前在超商打工也常遇到這種不講理的老人家,早就應付習慣了。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAbW07w1bnhC
316Please respect copyright.PENANAzVd4DppKjl
「原來如此…」316Please respect copyright.PENANACv5ZFgPnAX
316Please respect copyright.PENANAE3FxfMZd7x
「對了,這是我的名片。」OL小姐拿出一張很粉的名片「我現在在一間國際知名的貿易公司工作,叫我紅姐就好。」316Please respect copyright.PENANALVbJJ3SUvF
316Please respect copyright.PENANAT7rJADbdBb
曉玲接過名片,發現這張名片上寫了不少頭銜。什麼XX貿易公司的襄理,XX國際美容協會的理事長,XX理容公司的執行長…不知道為什麼,曉玲忽然打從心底升起一股不好的預感。316Please respect copyright.PENANAlVFFsHVAj8
316Please respect copyright.PENANAZwU5lY3To0
「這麼晚了還在打工,回去一定很晚睡吧?」OL小姐打開她的公事包「晚睡對皮膚不好喔,如果不好好保養再過幾年妳的皮膚就會變得跟剛剛那個老太太一樣失去彈性且一堆皺紋了。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAwu1lpoSLA2
316Please respect copyright.PENANAA8bEhKmvWi
曉玲開始苦笑,心裡想說拜託…就算我再過個十年也不可能變成跟剛剛那個老太太一樣。但是OL小姐大概沒注意到曉玲的表情(或許她是故意忽略),自顧自地從公事包中拿出一堆購物型錄跟看起來像美容保養用的瓶瓶罐罐。316Please respect copyright.PENANAxZTEa07lWb
316Please respect copyright.PENANAVkiAX9td91
「呃…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAoOApco5l2y
316Please respect copyright.PENANAxZeuNSVdKt
不知怎地,曉玲突然聯想到小時候看的多拉A夢卡通,大概是因為前陣子有發行多拉A夢icash 卡的關係吧。看著OL小姐從公事包裡拿出東西的樣子,就像是多拉A夢從他肚子上的四度空間袋裡面拿出道具的樣子。316Please respect copyright.PENANAtxl1YJptnF
316Please respect copyright.PENANAnzCDQXc171
「這罐是我常在用的保養品。」OL小姐拿起其中一罐藍色的,上面寫著看不懂的阿拉伯文可是卻有一小行寫著made in china 的藍色罐子「妳看我每天為了工作都得做到現在才能下班,等到要睡都已經三四點了。可是我的皮膚還是跟嬰兒一樣嫩,都是靠這罐美露清北極奈米冰河泥在保養呢。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAUd708bnbIM
316Please respect copyright.PENANAzscyOqePRI
說完,OL小姐用手指捏自己的臉頰,好像是在顯示自己的皮膚有多好。只可惜曉玲根本看不出來,她只覺得OL小姐的膚質似乎比她還差。316Please respect copyright.PENANAWpfx0Y0KWQ
316Please respect copyright.PENANARt7iSxvIoQ
「這罐如果妳跟國外廠商訂貨,一罐可都要一兩萬喔!可是因為我是在貿易公司工作再加上我是XX國際美容協會的理事長,透過關係這樣一瓶我只要成本價兩千就能拿到。看在妳跟我是朋友份上,我直接幫妳買,而且不收任何手續費,如何?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAx8slyP4rb5
316Please respect copyright.PENANALtd68GNsE3
姑且不論曉玲心中的他還沒有要走的意思,光是眼前這個OL上班女郎就夠讓她頭痛的。316Please respect copyright.PENANALZpq8jF9Fg
316Please respect copyright.PENANAWch97fiNgh
早在社會打滾許久的曉玲一看就知道這位OL小姐是做直銷的,而這世界上最可怕的人就是恐怖份子跟做直銷的人。316Please respect copyright.PENANARhLA8hQ1xm
316Please respect copyright.PENANAy34v4IVsRe
「怎?妳還在猶豫啊?好吧,看在我們交情不淺的份上,只要你現在買了我再送妳一瓶SKⅢ日夜雙用型美白組合。」說著說著,OL小姐又拿出一罐有著太極圖案蓋子的小玻璃罐,上面完全沒貼標籤「這罐平常可是要花五千元才買得到的喔!而且還有名場SKⅡ的售後服務保證,因為她們是姊妹廠。現在只要妳買了美露清這罐就當附贈品送妳,如何?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAepODKuNoGc
316Please respect copyright.PENANAwWYi0yrEFL
【註3─SK:316Please respect copyright.PENANAqlv6dbhEHK
一、Scandinavian Airlines System(誤解) 316Please respect copyright.PENANAfmR2m2i0ZK
斯堪地那維亞航空公司的國際簡稱316Please respect copyright.PENANAsoZHp2qKpv
316Please respect copyright.PENANAQ1RqxrqIkg
二、Max Factor的知名化妝品品牌SKⅡ316Please respect copyright.PENANAs6Zlxx6Kyo
的前兩個英文字母(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANA8UaQtVCxml
316Please respect copyright.PENANAamXxWWTqYT
注意:市面上並沒有SKⅢ這種化妝品 】316Please respect copyright.PENANA6sMmUEdkar
316Please respect copyright.PENANAQ8rBj9C0Wc
比起剛剛的老太婆,曉玲發現眼前的OL小姐更纏人了。沒有要買東西就算了竟然還敢跟店員推銷化妝品,而且才講沒幾句話甚至相處不到幾分鐘就把曉玲當作是她的朋友,還說交情不錯。已經對直銷業有豐富經驗的曉玲判斷這位OL小姐一定是位高手,下線恐怕還不只一層。316Please respect copyright.PENANAqanfhcLcrF
316Please respect copyright.PENANAAcC6XtWOto
對付這種人,原本是要花很多時間才能讓她知難而退的。但是曉玲現在根本就沒時間跟OL小姐瞎耗。但是如果要擺臭臉請她出去又會被曉玲心中的他給看到,這時曉玲的內心彷彿就像搖擺不定的少女天秤般不知該如何是好,只能一邊流淚一邊努力維持平衡。316Please respect copyright.PENANA3LgLQKHAqs
316Please respect copyright.PENANAjiBg1vM4JD
「怎麼了?看妳還在猶豫的樣子?」316Please respect copyright.PENANA7Yg3JSAhHe
316Please respect copyright.PENANAw8KciZfSyf
「嗯…」曉玲故作考慮貌「因為我也只是個工讀生,雖然我想買,但是兩千塊對我來說實在是筆不小的開銷…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAMPkpKYutgs
316Please respect copyright.PENANAQa4EMPeN6O
拐個彎子說自己沒錢,希望OL小姐能知難而退的曉玲在聽到OL小姐的回答後,不得不承認自己的想法太天真。316Please respect copyright.PENANA4CMzxV0ocF
316Please respect copyright.PENANAl8EoLpMY8c
「哎呀沒關係啦,現在現金卡那麼好辦,直接去ATM辦一張不就可以領個一兩萬了?年輕人不要老是計較那麼多,該花的就是要花,還管自己有沒有錢幹麻?那可是落伍的老人想法喔。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAZJsJYRC91M
316Please respect copyright.PENANAThQdUPP2Fz
曉玲又不是不知道現金卡的循環利息有多高,哪可能會被OL小姐的花言巧語給騙去。但是這下馬上又少了個藉口可以回絕,逼著曉玲不得不用最後一招。316Please respect copyright.PENANAantljH70yc
316Please respect copyright.PENANAltIWj60cqo
「我現在真的沒辦法買,不然這樣好了。妳把手機號碼給我,等我領到這個月的薪水再跟妳聯絡如何?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAFCwn8qdxmu
316Please respect copyright.PENANADQBlZQmZxV
「啊,那麼麻煩妳幹麻?乾脆妳的手機號碼給我,這樣我隨時都能找妳呀。」316Please respect copyright.PENANA7HcUwMHAe8
316Please respect copyright.PENANADfCIUV3g3Z
OL小姐眨了眨眼,好像在說妳想逃出我的魔掌沒那麼容易。曉玲看得是心裡直發毛,可是為了心中的他曉玲又不敢使出狠招,只好險中求生。316Please respect copyright.PENANAKdLKRCZv3K
316Please respect copyright.PENANA1cPdhGE9TR
「嗯…這樣也好,我挺容易忘事情的,要是妳能打來提醒我就好了。真是對不起,那麼麻煩妳喔。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAELHtoDxjVK
316Please respect copyright.PENANA31nIks8m9N
「不會不會。」OL小姐露出親切(充滿貪慾)的笑容「那趕快把手機給我,因為我也想早點回去睡覺呢。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAX8nY1tt1In
316Please respect copyright.PENANA4RGVus7IZF
「好的,手機號碼是09xxxxxxxx。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAwEi4quvnPW
316Please respect copyright.PENANAMGaTAJs7dW
其實那不是曉玲的手機號碼,就算再怎麼笨,曉玲也不會笨到把自己的手機號碼給一個不認識的人,尤其那個人又是在做直銷的。316Please respect copyright.PENANAbcQodIag5e
316Please respect copyright.PENANAZJOIY9kS4I
原本以為這樣就結束,沒想到OL小姐的陰險連曉玲都沒料到。只見她從公事包拿出一個Nokia 手機,二話不說就開始撥曉玲剛剛給她的手機號碼。316Please respect copyright.PENANA22PxLhQ12R
316Please respect copyright.PENANAkO57wxJmOO
一發現曉玲身上沒手機鈴聲但是自己手機卻接通了,OL小姐便一臉狐疑地看著曉玲,問:316Please respect copyright.PENANAUAuHJ6aDFs
316Please respect copyright.PENANAs11IGfFAbj
「這不是妳的手機號碼嗎?怎麼打了妳的手機沒響?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAgt8F9Hi6rt
316Please respect copyright.PENANArV0PQqBgRF
「哎呀~因為我今天忘了帶手機,手機放家裡呢。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAlbYaLcXBtE
316Please respect copyright.PENANARkUZCNembL
「喔…是嗎?」OL小姐沒把撥號動作切掉,顯然她在懷疑曉玲騙她。316Please respect copyright.PENANA0t43AMQb7s
316Please respect copyright.PENANA4dQv1B9DkN
「當然是這樣啊,不…不過我家裡還有其他人,說…說不定會接…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAReeEo8I7Ki
316Please respect copyright.PENANAUmLqIqftxv
說這話的時候,曉玲的心七上八下就好像在坐大怒神一樣。她不停祈禱著那隻手機號碼的原主人能在OL小姐切掉前不要按下通話鍵,不然她又得跟這個可怕的OL小姐繼續耗下去。316Please respect copyright.PENANAVvGt602Umq
316Please respect copyright.PENANAGrSzL4eSe7
所幸響了七八響都沒人接,OL小姐就關掉了,看來對方真的沒接的樣子。316Please respect copyright.PENANAqcQsv3ZAW9
316Please respect copyright.PENANAl447yB0zao
「呀~~~!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAc8L91OBGJH
316Please respect copyright.PENANAMdkvdYRkcl
OL小姐不知怎地突然發出一聲尖叫,然後回頭看著不知何時出現在她背後的中年男子。而那男子在OL小姐看著她的同時,也對著她露出很噁心的笑容。316Please respect copyright.PENANANdyCPztQTO
316Please respect copyright.PENANAUsFwzz2vmX
「呃…啊…」OL小姐臉上的笑容開始崩潰,她轉過頭跟曉玲說:「我得趕快回去補眠了,有空再打手機給妳。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAbxL2QmELXX
316Please respect copyright.PENANAgtMkT1qq1w
說完後OL小姐也不管曉玲有沒有跟她說再見,就用飛快到如火箭般的速度跑出門外,但這時曉玲卻巴不得她能留下來。316Please respect copyright.PENANA4fdyGurnST
316Please respect copyright.PENANAaTyGrNRjvt
果然一物剋一物,可怕的人一定會怕更可怕的人。曉玲看著眼前對她笑的中年男子,已經將這人判定成最危險的生物,叫做「痴漢」。316Please respect copyright.PENANAVCfO3kFZdV
316Please respect copyright.PENANAJ1NZzEJkCl
【註4─痴漢:316Please respect copyright.PENANAx4LlOx9gu2
316Please respect copyright.PENANAbMkP7Y3Qro
一、熱血笨蛋(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAbKh4t8uzo9
簡單的解釋就是白痴的男子漢。316Please respect copyright.PENANASwdK6wU9vj
316Please respect copyright.PENANAo5blUxBATV
二、變態男子(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAUuAgnivLSr
此用語是由日文直接沿襲過來的漢字用語,最常見的有316Please respect copyright.PENANAaNYvQfjtGX
電車痴漢。 】316Please respect copyright.PENANA8a8AsBlk7R
316Please respect copyright.PENANA5yII3JIlUa
「小姐…我想買運動短褲。」男子抓了抓看起來很久沒洗的頭「就是那個女高中生都會穿的那種。」316Please respect copyright.PENANARv1pCELeXf
316Please respect copyright.PENANAj07FTMy7vg
如果不是曉玲心中的他還在點心架那邊找找看有沒有新出品的巧克力的話,曉玲一定會把這名中年男子痛扁一頓,然後開始猛踹這名中年男子的LP。316Please respect copyright.PENANAsiEthPNgil
316Please respect copyright.PENANA1LLB6pXC3w
【註6─LP:316Please respect copyright.PENANAjkXIvBg0xl
一、maxisingle(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAzeBi8SLo5u
密紋唱片的簡稱,叫LP唱片,是很多古董收藏家眼中的寶。316Please respect copyright.PENANAnIsibMTe39
316Please respect copyright.PENANAj1kO0HnvIl
二、Lanm Pa (正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAVianjO0xhp
台語「懶趴」的英文音譯,語源發明者陳唐山部長。 】316Please respect copyright.PENANAvACyc41VLr
316Please respect copyright.PENANAxiDSZGZNC3
「先生…我們這邊沒在賣什麼運動短褲。」曉玲勉強提起自己因為極端憤怒而逐漸破碎的笑容「如果您想買的話應該去運動用品店問問才對。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAwbtG0bUSLV
316Please respect copyright.PENANAz9ee6VHkMW
「怎麼可能?你們便利商店除了人際關係不賣以外不是啥都賣嗎?」痴漢中年男子開始鬼叫「為什麼就不賣運動短褲?如果你們賣運動短褲的話一年收益肯定可以提昇一倍甚至兩倍,你們都不知道這東西有多少人想買喔?尤其是已經被高中女生穿過還有附照片的更是一件可以賣一兩萬。好吧不然沒有運動短褲,那連身泳衣總可以了吧?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAWs6o9a2hxQ
316Please respect copyright.PENANA714aOe9YW8
「先生…」曉玲察覺到自己的額頭已經開始冒青筋了,但是為了維持自己溫柔可人的形象,即使內心世界已經在上演世界末日跟彗星撞地球。她還是只能拼命忍住「我們店裡…並沒有在賣…什麼…連身泳衣。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAkQUoKWh1qN
316Please respect copyright.PENANAAJDG7YdMub
「啊~~~~~?」痴漢中年男子張大嘴巴,一臉不敢相信的表情「喂!你們這間便利商店怎麼那麼糟糕?連這東西都沒在賣那你們還賣啥?你們懂不懂啥叫客戶至上啊?懂不懂什麼叫服務業啊?客人想跟你們買東西,可是問什麼什麼就沒賣,那你們還開啥便利商店?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAsxrempNA1m
316Please respect copyright.PENANAgV8Cwmugsy
在一長串的牢騷後,男子長嘆口氣,然後接著說:316Please respect copyright.PENANAJpcQG5sOmK
316Please respect copyright.PENANAjwTREo7iZo
「不然這樣吧,我要買妳的內褲。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAOucFHB31qo
316Please respect copyright.PENANAy44YJRwg1a
「啊?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAlBr5LHwBok
316Please respect copyright.PENANAMcVgakdKpY
這次換曉玲張大嘴巴了。此時她的內心出現了二次世界大戰的濃縮版,當然包括諾曼地登陸跟日本核彈爆炸這兩幕。而且不知怎地,她好像還聽到第一滴血的主題曲(大概是因為藍波跟LP發音相近的關係)316Please respect copyright.PENANAjy3iG8jHNe
316Please respect copyright.PENANAUHnfYyGTpq
天啊…不管誰都好,拜託趕快趕走這個變態吧。曉玲如可憐的小兔子般向上帝耶穌穆罕默德黃帝釋迦牟尼佛隨便哪個神都亂祈禱,因為她已經看到她心中的那個他正捧著一堆東西要來結帳了。316Please respect copyright.PENANAzGGZ5UBaWG
316Please respect copyright.PENANAJSST1TugYx
就在這時,曉玲的祈禱奏效了。不過雖然不知道是哪個神聽到她的祈禱,但很糟糕的是那個神並不是很想讓曉玲如願。316Please respect copyright.PENANAs9XQ9mG4S7
316Please respect copyright.PENANAwX7tfRXzJ7
因為走進來的救星不是警察,也不是超人,是強盜。316Please respect copyright.PENANAVEyX9j5NoM
316Please respect copyright.PENANAIJeCcFUYYY
是的,有個頭戴安全帽的人衝進超商,一腳把痴漢中年男子踹倒在地上然後還猛踹男子的LP。接著拔出手槍對著曉玲,喊道:316Please respect copyright.PENANAp5eYdywuSH
316Please respect copyright.PENANAB5I8kdBvXL
「這是搶劫!趕快把收銀機裡的錢全拿出來!」316Please respect copyright.PENANANvPmXbjXBQ
316Please respect copyright.PENANAdLL7zTMEC8
曉玲嚇得舉起雙手,差點哭了出來。這時安全帽人不耐煩地又踹了倒在地上的痴漢中年男子的LP一腳,罵道:316Please respect copyright.PENANAPO5eQCDrqr
316Please respect copyright.PENANAubU5dFcwel
「妳聽不懂人話喔!?趕快把收銀機裡的錢全拿出來啊!」316Please respect copyright.PENANA7a0BaCyhKR
316Please respect copyright.PENANAIYM8TaaHjK
在遭受到老太太,OL小姐,還有痴漢先生的三重攻擊後,曉玲的腦袋早已完全無法正常運轉了。此時她只能一邊打開收銀機,一邊繼續祈禱能有人出來收拾這個強盜。316Please respect copyright.PENANADY7yknmmPq
316Please respect copyright.PENANA5A4skV1XsD
316Please respect copyright.PENANAtAcCVISS6x
「哼哼哼…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAXuFz9Nk567
316Please respect copyright.PENANAsVN1T1YXui
「呵呵呵…」316Please respect copyright.PENANA0cfTF22lNY
316Please respect copyright.PENANACpj73Nlqp2
就在曉玲這麼想的時候,門外傳來兩位男子詭異的笑聲。神經質的強盜看向外面,凶狠地問:316Please respect copyright.PENANAP8zx6mVZO6
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「是誰!?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAEmvJ6GE7mx
316Please respect copyright.PENANAGH79SEvnfM
熟悉的台詞在曉玲耳邊響起,她開始有種一切情況完全失控的預感。316Please respect copyright.PENANAfiTB4xCSO8
316Please respect copyright.PENANAzLynvSJYmo
「既然你誠心誠意地問了。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAKoqsdsM5cx
316Please respect copyright.PENANAofu99Qg6Y2
「那我們就大發慈悲告訴你吧!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAwJzSE61QYO
316Please respect copyright.PENANA6t1gRqxwvW
「為了防止告白被破壞!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAQmvkvQGMDv
316Please respect copyright.PENANAnxfec23PAM
「為了保護少女的純情!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAe8A6iJRlQI
316Please respect copyright.PENANAfRyyXgGSTm
「貫徹愛與真實的歡樂!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAdGRPRcWgrd
316Please respect copyright.PENANAkly8f31KQq
「帥氣又善良的正派角色!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAB30GkEKiTE
316Please respect copyright.PENANACbw2fNfi9t
「我是五臟!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAWNCNUDA5ZY
316Please respect copyright.PENANAC8rQhZHg86
「我是小之朗!」316Please respect copyright.PENANACQcKdmPVQR
316Please respect copyright.PENANATgud2FyHYa
「我們倆是只要有人要告白就會出現的好人戰隊!」316Please respect copyright.PENANADnQwhx5etM
316Please respect copyright.PENANAJ4mOvOirLg
「黃昏!美麗的夕陽正在等著我們!」316Please respect copyright.PENANANN9sGFheo3
316Please respect copyright.PENANAjmoQX2C3kq
這段台詞唸完,自動門便打開了。大量的白色煙霧噴入超商,然後就在所有人都反應不過來的幾秒間,有兩個以白色絲巾蒙住鼻子以上部位,穿著閃亮白衣披著白色披風的怪人飛躍而入。316Please respect copyright.PENANAXteZViK4SU
316Please respect copyright.PENANAVMd9GalDeu
「看我們的雙重~~~~~好人~~~~飛踢!!!!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAWCGIpgY68y
316Please respect copyright.PENANAP1PUEUwmQn
兩人齊聲吶喊,同時一人一腳踢向持槍的搶匪。結果那個搶匪就被強力的踢擊踢飛,倒在地上失去意識且全身不停抖動。316Please respect copyright.PENANAZpnHL5LWgj
316Please respect copyright.PENANAKIwsBNA5n3
【註7─好人:316Please respect copyright.PENANAMQL8mzqPA3
一、善良的人(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAqV3dyV2m8B
基本上好人都是善良的人沒錯,但是還有點不一樣。316Please respect copyright.PENANAwNvS2Ju4Ht
316Please respect copyright.PENANAt4DeRF8y2H
二、喜歡的人不喜歡自己,但還是願為那人奉獻一切的人(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAYbq9wsPcyJ
Dear John....you are a good man.... 】316Please respect copyright.PENANAH7V8n0iHnf
316Please respect copyright.PENANAAch0LFxomW
「太好了!五臟!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAUHYWtlOd8U
316Please respect copyright.PENANAdGojv27Jzx
「是啊!小之朗!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAdbYp5uUJVd
316Please respect copyright.PENANASzNUPGWq19
兩個白衣怪人以手臂互勾,擺出健美先生都很喜歡擺的,充滿力與美的姿勢。316Please respect copyright.PENANAceowyPbG79
316Please respect copyright.PENANAsr93aMRUGp
看著兩個非常明顯是在模仿某有名動畫的某白爛二人組的名言,大剌剌地出現在她面前擺出健美姿勢的怪人,曉玲突然有種這是怎樣為什麼我只是想告白結果怪人一直出現怪事一直發生就算了還一直刺激我內心的OS打算害得我一直動殺氣到想殺人卻又不能殺因為我還想告白不想犯下中華民國刑法第兩百七十三條因為那屬限制級不能亂寫只好用數字帶過所以讀者想看請去翻中華民國刑法或者拜求亞虎大神或古狗大神網路搜尋馬上找得到還有這絕對不是作者想混字數亂寫請各位讀者不要胡思亂想另外特地澄清一下這不是騙錢作品這的確還是愛情小說因為女主角曉玲馬上就要告白。316Please respect copyright.PENANA4iEXwQpd2v
316Please respect copyright.PENANAPmG5vTSWSK
【註8─OS:316Please respect copyright.PENANAoT1S3KIau6
一、Over Soul(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAqMlYNmTQx5
靈魂之上的東西,布啦布啦布啦布啦………(以下省略)316Please respect copyright.PENANAhsWpOeBnsg
316Please respect copyright.PENANA9h1mB39eJP
二、Origin Soul(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAmAU3CWOlYI
原始的靈魂,泛指人的獸性,不理性的一面。 】316Please respect copyright.PENANAE1yfydQQFU
316Please respect copyright.PENANAEkWk1E7vam
「小姐!」好人五臟興奮地對曉玲喊著。316Please respect copyright.PENANADCJk4XKx7I
316Please respect copyright.PENANAcgxmr16uN6
「小姐!」好人小之朗興奮地對曉玲喊著。316Please respect copyright.PENANABGkjpB3W4r
316Please respect copyright.PENANAGvierQnCvm
「告~白~吧~~!」兩個好人異口同聲興奮地對曉玲喊著。316Please respect copyright.PENANA3EWH8bZO58
316Please respect copyright.PENANAAkQuHGYVZV
曉玲看了看四周,白色煙霧尚未散去,地上倒了兩個不知是死是活的人,而且眼前還有兩個怪人拼命用力地擺健美姿勢。這種情況下根本就沒有辦法華麗又純情地告白。316Please respect copyright.PENANAmrPgLxDnPE
316Please respect copyright.PENANA9t0aHox2dQ
曉玲又看向心中的他,此時的他看來竟然如泰山般穩重,對於眼前的怪人怪事見怪不怪,那表情甚至可以用悠哉來形容。316Please respect copyright.PENANAqto0vlxXWe
316Please respect copyright.PENANAy0QjCCjqkT
不行,打死她也不想在這種情況下告白。曉玲如此想著,心底只能拼命祈禱這兩個好怪的人能趕快滾出去。316Please respect copyright.PENANAHy8tRp3kzP
316Please respect copyright.PENANAi9P6hFPZHk
大概是今晚愛管閒事的神特別多,曉玲的心願馬上就又實現了。316Please respect copyright.PENANAuo5DkXkKcR
316Please respect copyright.PENANACpjb9mb4hg
「哼哼哼嘿嘿嘿嘿哈哈哈哈~~~~」超商門外傳來一群男人洪厚的笑聲。316Please respect copyright.PENANApYOawbhWzy
316Please respect copyright.PENANAH17Drow178
「有光的存在必然有影的存在!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAN1GJKAxpYv
316Please respect copyright.PENANAgtwaHP21Um
「有好人就必然有去死去死團!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAlM75dWRwSe
316Please respect copyright.PENANAFaGQTHEnUd
「只要有告白要發生的地方就有我們會出現!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAeHfpQ1dRz4
316Please respect copyright.PENANAPCRfDs3ukb
「請叫我們!去死去死團F5!!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAzahNcrwrnk
316Please respect copyright.PENANAaiW3inCARg
【註8─去死去死團:316Please respect copyright.PENANAWahsgSFU8B
一、葬儀社(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANA5B18hDmwzY
基本上葬儀社不會叫別人去死,雖然他們都很想。316Please respect copyright.PENANAZVyMVNS2mw
316Please respect copyright.PENANAzUDucwyInx
二、因為情人或聖誕節的怨念而誕生的可怕團體(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAJM1HaTZfmh
沒有情人的人的進化型,與好人是光與影的存在 】316Please respect copyright.PENANACw2kequVpq
316Please respect copyright.PENANARcWXDxtFw7
語畢,自動門再度打開。門外走入五個穿黑衣臉上蓋黑布的男子,雖然他們的隊呼不像有抄襲任何人,但曉玲還是覺得很老套,尤其是F5這兩個字根本就是在抄襲某知名偶像團體。316Please respect copyright.PENANAMaFmCroZnI
316Please respect copyright.PENANAqm1oup7Vmi
「什麼?」好人五臟與好人小之朗同時往後退一步「沒想到你們竟然還敢出現在我們面前啊,去死去死團F5!!」316Please respect copyright.PENANABMGpTavz01
316Please respect copyright.PENANAHTLlEqwpIh
帶頭的,頭上有插根尖角的那位站了出來,態度囂張地說:316Please respect copyright.PENANAbB09iN23AR
316Please respect copyright.PENANARliKphrGha
「開玩笑,雖然我們沒有像你們那身肌肉。但是我們以量取勝,你們兩個人的體重又豈能大過我們五個人?為什麼我們非得要怕你們啊好人戰隊?」316Please respect copyright.PENANA8N659Hr7d3
316Please respect copyright.PENANAi2vKCVViFc
「說得好!既然這樣,那麼男人與男人之間只有靠戰來作靈魂上的溝通了!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAClBEulWcZX
316Please respect copyright.PENANA3lZLaxchg0
對於好人戰隊的挑釁,去死去死團F5毫不畏懼地收下,五人齊聲道:316Please respect copyright.PENANALUkJACFWmH
316Please respect copyright.PENANALAWnNSfYSl
「那就~戰~~~~吧!!!!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAHc49AFwaBU
316Please respect copyright.PENANAP9mcG1xJpg
【註10─戰:316Please respect copyright.PENANAfvIafBlvg4
一、動詞:打仗。名詞:戰爭(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAQPHCRqMjt9
現在這個時代很和平,提到戰爭大家都怕得要死。316Please respect copyright.PENANAvB6w8K71Rq
316Please respect copyright.PENANAk3yjBH5zLP
二、語氣詞:港漫用語,只是用在激動的時候胡亂叫的(正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANA3T5ggzCVgV
要是有常看香港漫畫的人就知道這是啥意思。 】316Please respect copyright.PENANAWP93KRcPpt
316Please respect copyright.PENANAltrQ14IRBo
由於這些人的焦點似乎已經不在自己身上,曉玲好不容易才鬆口氣。這時曉玲心中的他也走到收銀台,將他挑好的飲料,泡麵,還有巧克力,御便當,生活職人毛巾,健美生活館的幾罐健康飲品,還有一包原味覺醒的點心放在櫃檯前面。316Please respect copyright.PENANA2JNW3t2BuZ
316Please respect copyright.PENANArkngqygDy5
「要結帳啦?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAoqfVncqCSZ
316Please respect copyright.PENANArJ4SgJ7BKG
「嗯。」曉玲心中的他點點頭。316Please respect copyright.PENANAaEv35V0rg2
316Please respect copyright.PENANA80ESOiIIF7
「既然要戰,那我們就先比文吧!」好人五臟在兩人身後鬼叫。316Please respect copyright.PENANArDcCtSqwyF
316Please respect copyright.PENANAmsDFYaSUWU
「沒問題,那麼第一題就由我來出!」頭上有戴角的去死去死團團長不甘示弱地大喊。316Please respect copyright.PENANAmBOygoWUyY
316Please respect copyright.PENANAGYPAZPzbgi
「真抱歉…今天比較特別。」曉玲很不好意思地說著「連我都不知道為什麼會亂成這樣子。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAdRQXFx9yLk
316Please respect copyright.PENANAsHYJZleQvX
「沒關係。」曉玲心中的他有點靦腆地笑著「我的室友們也常常做些莫名其妙的事,所以我能理解這社會怪人真的很多。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAUCljjkabLm
316Please respect copyright.PENANA1QpuC47svj
「可惡啊~~~小之朗我不行了,拜託你了……嗚……啊………」316Please respect copyright.PENANAvaDhl5Fown
316Please respect copyright.PENANA5DoGonRFlb
五臟發出慘叫,倒在小之朗的胸中。悲憤至極的小之朗忍不住仰天長嘯:316Please respect copyright.PENANA8NYdhw7UOV
316Please respect copyright.PENANA7B3yXeyWVX
「五臟~~~~~~五臟啊~~~~~~~」316Please respect copyright.PENANA9HfNJkt2Py
316Please respect copyright.PENANADNekTELC69
「唉…可是我也不知道該說什麼,總之這裡好像整個脫序…」曉玲想著想著眼淚就越來越忍不住「本來今晚我原本計劃好的事情全都被這群怪人打亂了…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAhDOLedlsej
316Please respect copyright.PENANAPbNkfwbcMg
「別喪氣嘛。」曉玲心中的他低著頭開始找錢包「人生就是要這樣,才有意思啊。要是什麼都照計劃來,那會少掉很多樂趣喔。」316Please respect copyright.PENANALro8KYeYRD
316Please respect copyright.PENANAbMp75Wegau
「可惡啊~~~我真的怒了!」小之朗發出金黃色的鬥氣「你們就給我納~命~來~吧!!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAxZXtYsIM2a
316Please respect copyright.PENANA9csPrVmdcn
強大的氣勢讓F5一行人感到強大的威脅,但是他們已經退無可退。316Please respect copyright.PENANAtqQpgaFoGo
316Please respect copyright.PENANAUCidYvv5ME
「難…難道這就是傳說中的…超級好人模式?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAJgizhxHGX8
316Please respect copyright.PENANA1H8BneZnsm
所謂的超級好人模式,只有在即使犧牲生命也要保衛自己信念的好人身上。通常發動超級好人模式的好人會渾身發出金黃色的鬥氣,進入明鏡止水的最強狀態,一個超級好人就能抵一百個好人。316Please respect copyright.PENANA0HtgzipIGZ
316Please respect copyright.PENANAHC0A8gggLA
「天啊…如果是這樣的話,那我們擋不住啊…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAWhcxwNBAIJ
316Please respect copyright.PENANAVRG8Y9gx7p
「你們快走!」頭上戴角的去死去死團團長擋在小之朗面前「這裡交給我!」316Please respect copyright.PENANA9OV1iPeNxy
316Please respect copyright.PENANA35PBsBTI4s
「不~~團長,我們不能拋下你不管!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAyi4YkiZh8P
316Please respect copyright.PENANAmDd4Ca4MSb
「不行,就算身為頭腦的我死了也沒關係,只要你們能活下去,去死去死團就能活下去!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAcfIBYzkWoi
316Please respect copyright.PENANAnmASTYEfoe
「可是一個人如果沒了腦袋,就會死了啊~~~」316Please respect copyright.PENANApEsZ2SSI1e
316Please respect copyright.PENANAr9VDe7ut9n
「不要跟我爭論些有的沒的,該拋棄就要拋棄,快走!!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAD3yVqKEWxl
316Please respect copyright.PENANA0ntMC4lLbS
無聊的鬧劇繼續在曉玲與曉玲心中的他身後發生,但是此時的曉玲一點都不在意,因為她現在正沉浸在她與他兩人之間距離又稍微拉近的喜悅之中。316Please respect copyright.PENANAXfnnispz5P
316Please respect copyright.PENANA52QhDPLfyz
「好了,一共是三百四十元。」曉玲把已經打好的統一發票抓下「你需要袋子嗎?」316Please respect copyright.PENANAQEd1CBh08W
316Please respect copyright.PENANABe2TKQh6QS
「嗯。」曉玲心中的他慢條斯理地把零錢全掏出來「抱歉喔,因為都是同學事先給的所以全是零錢。」316Please respect copyright.PENANArqoROVBEej
316Please respect copyright.PENANA5L2mcj4Owb
「沒關係啦。」曉玲從抽屜中拿出一個上面印有「7-Eleven (R),地球的好鄰居」字樣的的淺綠色塑膠袋「反正也常有人來我們這邊換零錢,這樣剛好用得到啊。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAkCamUgDU5p
316Please respect copyright.PENANAmejSXv7cU7
「小之朗接招,看我的去死去死拳!喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦喔啦(乘以1667)」316Please respect copyright.PENANAsPiiySa5gw
316Please respect copyright.PENANAuqVRpkfmpj
面對頭上有戴角的去死去死團長的無數亂拳,超級好人小之朗竟然全都以毫米之差閃過了,一邊閃他還一邊很輕鬆地說:316Please respect copyright.PENANAfO9OlckV3z
316Please respect copyright.PENANAiKLPtZtSPE
「無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用無用(乘以1667)」316Please respect copyright.PENANA6NmPRPi4ep
316Please respect copyright.PENANAsoY6hXjbDY
兩人的激鬥產生的能量彷彿能將整個地球打碎,不過卻絲毫無法影響到在櫃檯由曉玲與曉玲心中的他兩人營造出來的甜蜜氣氛。316Please respect copyright.PENANACPlBu70m57
316Please respect copyright.PENANA4ImE8TOj1p
「來,都裝好了。」曉玲笑著說「真抱歉讓你見笑了,謝謝你鼓勵我。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAT8vonf6EOl
316Please respect copyright.PENANAIEFaSa2Usp
「別這麼說。」曉玲心中的他有點不知所措地搔搔自己的鼻尖「只是因為看到他們就想到我那堆怪室友,有種妳的處境跟我很像的感覺,忍不住就…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAE1XNrC5Ne1
316Please respect copyright.PENANAQ36hnY6gGy
話還沒說完,曉玲心中的他的手竟然不小心碰到曉玲的手了。指尖互碰的兩人當場楞在那兒,要伸也不是縮也不是。316Please respect copyright.PENANAlVsLeQMhdm
316Please respect copyright.PENANAF3NHO0HmiJ
啊啊…現在就算恐怖大王要降臨地球也不在乎了。內心充滿幸福的曉玲正在心裡演奏著哈雷路亞和快樂頌,完全沒把眼前那兩位激鬥的超級好人小之朗跟頭上戴角的去死去死團長看在眼裡,也忘了他們兩個其實是在為曉玲她而戰。316Please respect copyright.PENANAZVUZ7fnsre
316Please respect copyright.PENANA2NEotOCYzV
「快遞快遞!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAmXn9yUSXFK
316Please respect copyright.PENANAnQNp8pqDbv
可愛的聲音自門外傳來,打斷曉玲跟曉玲心中的他甜蜜的時間。早就習慣被打斷的曉玲看了他一眼,露出無奈的苦笑。316Please respect copyright.PENANA9IvyQ7T4Co
316Please respect copyright.PENANASk4DUYoceZ
「這麼晚了還會有快遞。」曉玲轉頭看向門口「真是奇怪。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAUhxonloxkk
316Please respect copyright.PENANASicZrJKM1r
自動門再度打開,兩個穿著女僕服和圍裙,頭上戴著貓耳朵的小女孩捧著一個箱子的兩邊走進超商。316Please respect copyright.PENANAhw1Y3Oy4FZ
316Please respect copyright.PENANAsca5L6DUbi
「捏口咪咪!」原本已經死掉的五臟,跟昏迷的變態男子還有搶匪醒了。316Please respect copyright.PENANA5Drm1amnVX
316Please respect copyright.PENANAx1aJqM6njk
「捏口咪咪!」變成超級好人模式的小之朗恢復了原本的好人模式。316Please respect copyright.PENANA7rOudD2w7Z
316Please respect copyright.PENANAg8zBjm2unf
「捏口咪咪!」頭上戴著角不停揮拳的去死去死團長跟在他背後死賴著不走的去死去死團圓全都驚訝地張口大叫。316Please respect copyright.PENANAqf023lkUTJ
316Please respect copyright.PENANAgTglfVXqAY
【註12─捏口咪咪:316Please respect copyright.PENANAMcWMh3Dpju
一、йёκΘщιщι(誤解)316Please respect copyright.PENANANB0PN2GsA8
火星語,意思是強壯的巨人(因為是火星語所以都亂碼)316Please respect copyright.PENANAl0DFtTiqKD
316Please respect copyright.PENANA9N6b9fFzOt
二、ねこみみ[nekomimi](正解)316Please respect copyright.PENANAoIunPxG9Wr
日本語,意思是貓耳朵。316Please respect copyright.PENANA7Vw8P4agTM
注意:作者在kkcity站Edit分站的板名也是nekomimi 】316Please respect copyright.PENANAuOj7b9Rlp8
316Please respect copyright.PENANAKJ9XWL2Q4t
「我們是二十五世紀的黑貓宅急便。」右邊那位有著琥珀色眼睛的女孩露出虎牙可愛地笑著「我是潔希卡,請多指教。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAfbinlBqtVS
316Please respect copyright.PENANADCCqOusONr
左邊那位黑髮女孩向眾人鞠躬,說:「我是瑪琪莉亞,請多指教。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAnenX0Mh8n1
316Please respect copyright.PENANA0lsjYxKIy1
除了曉玲心中的他以外,眾人全都對眼前這兩位可愛的貓耳小女孩投以懷疑的目光。黑髮女孩咳了一下,然後拿出一卷長長的捲軸,唸道:316Please respect copyright.PENANAQbD8nPIjr2
316Please respect copyright.PENANAvUDgbJRQ08
「西元2407年聯邦時光管理局根據量子物理學TFP研究室所提出的相關研究中,確認平行宇宙論的論文裁定任何改變過去的行為皆不影響現在因此亦不違法,所以2422年各大快遞業開始了時光包裹服務。黑貓宅急便快遞公司根據聯邦時光管理法則編號第C976623SQ法則申請通過時光包裹服務,開始時光包裹宅配到人服務。」316Please respect copyright.PENANALSKhxBcHTO
316Please respect copyright.PENANAANRb8T8PjQ
在說完一大長串應該沒有任何人聽得懂的鬼東西後,黑髮女孩看向曉玲心中的他,說:316Please respect copyright.PENANABJkctjiKcE
316Please respect copyright.PENANARx8uVHCgzy
「這個箱子是你的曾曾曾……曾孫要給你的,好像是生日禮物。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAPqE17XEEZ0
316Please respect copyright.PENANAbLi1DgSwvL
「啊?」他平靜地看著箱子「原來今天是我生日,我都不知道說…」316Please respect copyright.PENANADV9xWSS30v
316Please respect copyright.PENANAe2eoswONfb
「來…請簽收。」虎牙女孩拿出一個透明的玻璃板子跟一枝像光筆的東西「直接簽名就可以囉。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAYq3iNB14Vn
316Please respect copyright.PENANA0rdMEG0QIc
在曉玲心中的他在簽完名交給虎牙小女孩並收下包裹後,兩位小女孩就對著所有人深深一鞠躬接著高興地揮手,笑道:316Please respect copyright.PENANAQzgjW2v9Na
316Please respect copyright.PENANAiCF7bA6FWF
「感謝您使用黑貓宅急便時光包裹宅配到人服務,希望我們下次有機會能再次為各位服務。」316Please respect copyright.PENANATj5B1mF3A0
316Please respect copyright.PENANAjI7fIgVmVi
說完,兩個小女孩走出自動門,隨即被一陣強光所掩蓋而消失。316Please respect copyright.PENANAxoOTXyPTo6
316Please respect copyright.PENANAxMbvFZnSGH
【嚴重聲明:二十一世紀的黑貓宅急便並沒有時光包裹宅配到人服務喔! 】316Please respect copyright.PENANAsUHrcqJREk
316Please respect copyright.PENANAmFd4fkSDP7
【嚴重聲明二:作者絕對不是為了混字數才寫上面那段! 】316Please respect copyright.PENANA7KSdVGBBhD
316Please respect copyright.PENANAC30TvHRLp4
因為兩個小女孩突然介入而陷入沉默的眾人在經過片刻後,才聽到小之朗突然開口叫道:316Please respect copyright.PENANABUQVDNFOdK
316Please respect copyright.PENANAZB4s3LAdCu
「捏口咪咪女神走了!」316Please respect copyright.PENANA40pAImChBr
316Please respect copyright.PENANAdWYEHIbO3i
「那我們也該走了!」接著五臟也附和了。316Please respect copyright.PENANAvWoJjuWwsY
316Please respect copyright.PENANA3uSzoZRJpK
「抱歉打擾了,我們也該離開了!」頭上戴著角的去死去死團長帶著團員走出自動門「好人戰隊後會有期啦!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAdHeI55wXs5
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好人戰隊沒有搭理去死去死團,他們只是看向曉玲和曉玲心中的她。然後用力地比出大拇指露出清爽的笑容與潔白的牙齒。316Please respect copyright.PENANABPZbSU3Q3A
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「加油吧!」好人五臟如此說著。316Please respect copyright.PENANAqJDwNEY1J9
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「要幸福喔!」好人小之朗如此說著。316Please respect copyright.PENANANyFtr6uWBH
316Please respect copyright.PENANAdIARg2mDoJ
「黃昏!美麗的夕陽正等著我們!」兩人如此說著,頭也不回地奔出超商。316Please respect copyright.PENANAqEDfW9ft5X
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轉眼間,整個超商裡終於只剩下曉玲和曉玲心中的他兩人了。316Please respect copyright.PENANAKNWz4a3frx
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「他們都跑光了呢…」曉玲哈哈苦笑幾聲。316Please respect copyright.PENANAG5mTCUqTPz
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「是啊…」316Please respect copyright.PENANARpIoA9HHqd
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「唉…今晚真是超累的。」曉玲嘆口氣。316Please respect copyright.PENANAU8TCOclAf6
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「辛苦你了。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAwQQS2Yqh6C
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「不…不過真沒想到,今天是你的生日呢…」316Please respect copyright.PENANAbfoC3QEBcR
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「啊…我也沒想到今天是我生日,差點就在不知情的情況下過去了。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAdOzDJfqvLa
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「祝你生日快樂!」316Please respect copyright.PENANAOIHpD5f1Dy
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「謝謝。」他提起袋子「我該走囉。」316Please respect copyright.PENANA2t5U2cCccP
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「嗯…」曉玲笑著揮了揮手「謝謝光臨。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAALEjqV2XPh
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看著曉玲心中的他走出自動門,曉玲不禁感到十分無力。沒辦法,今天實在經歷過太多怪事了,讓曉玲有種不知道明天能不能繼續下去的疲憊感覺。316Please respect copyright.PENANAbw2bJ9cBZB
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「啊…對了。」他在走出自動門前突然回頭以側臉的微笑看著曉玲「這是我這輩子第一次聽到有人跟我說生日快樂,所以我還蠻高興的呢。」316Please respect copyright.PENANAjofZdzb8eN
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最後自動門關上,曉玲突然又有明天可以繼續努力下去的勇氣了。316Please respect copyright.PENANAhMMANnLmsY
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