09.156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2nUUISGk9
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFg5XS2Zn7
課業繁重，人際不順，升上高校之後的日子過得並不能算得上好。但我向來是報喜不報憂的性子，因此即使是夏油傑，我也沒向他吐露半點不快。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOSPZDAtfl1
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfHYPjPAjw
又是一日放學。我一出校門就看見夏油傑站在樹蔭底下，他自然地拿走我的包，一手牽起我，帶著我走往熟悉的方向。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6K4Mv8Wwts
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJM0zfAwUHm
傑。我突然停下腳步，輕聲喊他。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunWPIsqTov
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ84yVL8FnXr
他回頭看向我，「嗯？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOEAWkH4vhI
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCoCVi56Ceg
盯著夏油傑額上溢出的薄汗，我墊起腳尖用手帕替他擦拭。要不我以後自己走回家吧？我問。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVqppk3VYID
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgnaX363dT
「怎麼了？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3meHlcyRm
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvPplxh0Lf
沒什麼，我搖搖頭，「太熱了，捨不得你等。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF0h8wozsRJ
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzxXCKZK0vL
暑夏已至，正是咒靈好發的時節，夏油傑的工作量肯定是只增不減。雖然我天天見他，很難察覺他具體的改變，但也不難看出最近的他正處於極度疲憊的狀態中。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlTUYsDAmi
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8SAMUzhAK2
「還好。」他言簡意賅地回應我。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWe3ctWJChM
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbUgaUQR3F
騙人，你話都變少了。我說，「連你的瀏海看起來都沒元氣了啦。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoHveECRIbz
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXxLYWMBnW
「……」夏油傑看向我的眼神逐漸不善。我連忙告饒討好，語帶撒嬌，「開玩笑的、開玩笑的──原諒我嘛──」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡscBnHE80ss
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXiIPVZNJBD
經我這麼一插科打諢，氣氛總算有所緩和。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl2jog7suvQ
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibI0NSb5GU
不過我真的很擔心你，我說。又是苦夏嗎？156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB00M4pbBRp
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5cZ6O3wa2
他說對。我對他的回答毫不意外，「那挑一天來我家吧？我們一起吃冰鎮西瓜怎麼樣？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsrNs8mTrl
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgPQVJiA54
夏油傑凝視我，他最後伸手輕撫我的髮絲，柔聲說好。我顯而易見地鬆了一口氣，近日的疲乏感似乎隨著他的動作一掃而空。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFplrZmK1rk
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfILCGvRoks
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1kRZwjmQw
「除了冰鎮西瓜以外，還想吃什麼？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfSUBZec5q
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFYeIzZaypV
「唔，綠豆湯吧。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfIzL7bmk7n
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6kvX0WWme3
「好呀，那蕎麥麵呢？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3ssbdnbNJ
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ69lbS50yi7
「也要。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEVMqnkF4Y
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDwdEJcBgX
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCXecyJUgO
圍繞在他身邊，我一路叨叨絮絮，像極一隻嘰嘰喳喳的鳥兒；而他背對夕色，看向我的眼神繾綣而溫軟。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFl8BWKBNR
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡViY8D8g4yb
我永遠不會忘記這一刻。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAjcvGWHgr
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidgA5dpBVA
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB6n06izRla
從那之後我開始自己上下學──花費整整一個月的時間，我才終於習慣「沒有夏油傑在身邊」這件事情。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡne38T6OVVr
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmx4avKwa3E
但還是難免想念。以前總覺得愛就是無時無刻的陪伴與關注，但在這三十個幾乎見不到他的晝夜裡，我卻突然有了新的看法。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzLfQJHxhe
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDIZSqJdmB
我開始將注意力擺放在夏油傑以外的人身上。下課時和幾個不錯的同學說說話，一起去逛喜歡的店家，假日偶爾約出去吃飯；放學走在熟悉的小徑上，我察覺到一旁的樹叢終於開了小小的花，是我喜歡的顏色。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK93kIHVS1M
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlc33KBjE3z
流動的風、落下的雨、搖晃的枝椏、落入耳裡的鈴鐺聲……我的世界變得多采多姿。不再是只有夏油傑，不再滿心滿眼都只有他。我知道我還是喜歡這個人，但我的生活卻因為與愛人的分離變得更美好──而我就會在這些美好的瞬間想起他。想跟他一起坐在虹龍上，看每一場東升西落；想跟他一起手牽著手，走過長長的街道。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOhsLfqMjb
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIa3u46Xl5
正因為聚少離多，所以才明白與他相處的每分每秒是多麼珍貴。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDLR6JxTxj
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVnPZuiuIT
「分離使我意識到愛的本質。」我傳給他的簡訊上這樣寫著。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRYcemQrrIQ
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAP4tp39ro
愛是彌補彼此的缺陷，是兩個破碎靈魂的相擁。我眼看鏡子裡笑容日漸燦爛的自己，心想自己大概也擁有那種包容一切的力量了。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSWYfa4wcbF
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzl2zPA5g69
「愛的本質？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPQPSVNGVe
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXPkwj6BiB
「是啊。」我回應他，「我覺得愛是寬容。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1vVNXoYwv
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9b6eNRfRp
放你飛翔，做你的歸巢。在你不在身邊的時候將自己活得出色，以最好的姿態迎接你。我想這是愛吧？156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZvGkBqLg6s
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnxv3Vlvik
「……你說的對。」半晌，他回應我。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXIjz6PtDw2
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzn38h57sN8
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKbaUvGYHBm
再見到夏油傑的時候已經是過年的事情。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ESoHE1NIi
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtlpJ2Q8meG
「新年快樂。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIhgPS6E51h
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArmBs8LOTV
站在我家門口，他身影單薄，臉上的微笑仍然好看。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxz3BLF0orw
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43BRd3GHbq
很難肯定是不是錯覺，但是幾月不見的夏油傑，我的男友，我的愛人──他似乎變得很陌生。這個認知讓我有些無所適從。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJv7aqJ2NBa
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJDBMNiU7Q
我看著他，最後只能擠出一個微笑。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEeBRG7kwL
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxKtnYEHnv
「新年快樂，傑。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwIcfhDLOd
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdCMOkfW95
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5GKPz4Jvr
──或許關係就是這樣破滅的。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eCv3Z2gzT
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9D4L60BXj
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8af3kPmgN
10.156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwmv6A8qRj
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3z6zBdNvLg
夏油傑向來很寵我。這點無論是交往前還是交往後都是。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbR1JT2BnL
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeoHEhJHVnm
以前只當是他對於鄰居妹妹的愛護之心而已，又或者是個性使然──畢竟他從小到大都是優等生，名氣響亮到街坊鄰居沒有人不知道他；說白點，「夏油傑」這三個字就是父母們拿來教育小孩的名詞。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfWCx630sf
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSaML91XMP
還記得那時才剛搬家不久，爸爸媽媽出差去了，於是家裡又只剩下我一個。這種事對我而言並不稀奇，反倒是夏油一家得知這件事情之後，便隔三差五地喊我去他們家吃飯。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtceALRPOC1
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfV7gARYG7
我臉皮薄，不大好意思經常打擾他們一家，有時也會推托找些藉口婉拒夏油阿姨的好意。然而姓夏油的大抵都是貼心的性子，在察覺到我的難為情後，他們開始換各種方式明裡暗裡地照顧我。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCPNPuM5Og
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGfKooDu3o
而夏油傑就是那道讓我跟他們產生更多交集的橋樑。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHg5i6TAVP
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKi9JNuR7ni
我跟他差不了多少歲，每天一起上下學，夏油傑時常拎著父母特別叮囑要交給我的便當，然後笑眯咪地找各種說詞讓我收下──我覺得其實這對他來說大概算不上什麼難事，因為他很聰明。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWn83YxfkHo
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpR4Fvhbg3e
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqWXJ8zB41
隨著時間遞進，我們更熟悉一些之後，我也未曾深思這個問題。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gx8zluewc
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdA0Byrdow
我只知道他從最初我們認識的那時就對我很好。一直都對我很好。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZKsnqx8Eu
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjkhSjeoLn
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj0XaBB6AZA
一推開家門就聞到濃濃的血腥氣。我拿著手機有些腳軟，腦袋空白了好幾秒之後只想到要打給夏油傑──轉念一想，他大概還在出任務也說不定，於是改成打報警電話。但就在我準備撥通的時候，夏油傑打過來了。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtldq8tM7m6
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVF3VpKr1tp
我連忙接起，不敢大聲說話：「傑……」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMPtFZsi5V
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU12H4zbILc
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznY5zMsrGB
電話那端傳來的聲音聽上去有些失真。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQegh7DvZ1r
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH7YgSE36ny
他對我說：不進來嗎？156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi9rzU69wyE
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMOMUGMdfc
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirTVVHNn6P
室內傳來的聲響與他說話的聲音近乎同步。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJpTkx8SF5
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzgRrS9ckh
前方客廳的門被緩緩地、緩緩地推開。是夏油傑，他握著手機的那隻手還舉在耳邊。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6veXhkzRsn
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEllJPGab5y
正在聽電話那頭傳來的，急促的呼吸聲。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfSZLgCMwvY
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9SsM810uX
「……不進來也沒關係，反正你走不掉的。」他用一種令人毛骨悚然的溫柔語氣和話筒另一端的人說話。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxA88qcBYp1
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSAfXF6Gbx
惟有那雙棕色的晦暗視線，自始至終都停留在我身上，從未移開。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjYuQ1rw3L
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuV1bsdiH6h
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1Nnxuh4uJ
就在此時此刻，我才突然驚覺，或許不僅僅只是如此。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNssUSJfOEt
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9uxu4FMw7
我好像從未了解過他。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9pEAz0Qfn
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkWPZyPTuo
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsBSITAlCR
我站在玄關處與他對視。側過臉的時候，還能看見一旁鏡子映照出自己蒼白的臉孔和閃爍的目光。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3b9oIYksiW
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDdXZloEBVj
「是你嗎？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnQENBT5HDO
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1ZN2YX9Qx
是我──他用一種跟平常無二致的語氣如此回應。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUhEW0e0RV
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzaM06Vy81l
「……我能問問為什麼嗎？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxIgcIAnzk
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5bcT9K8PT
夏油傑笑了一下。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSksZ8XgTGc
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMAiFYUa5vk
「我為什麼要跟猴子解釋理由？」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQO23W9fqb
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3a6TLjd9VL
──猴子。聽見這個尖銳而充滿冒犯的詞彙從他嘴裡出來的時候，我略感意外、又好像是意料之中地跟著笑了。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡot0FUg2Muv
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuAqomhJkk
我知道夏油傑的性子並不若表面上那樣可親，他實際上是個慣於用上對下角度去看待世界的人；物以類聚，他若不傲慢，怎能跟五條悟處得來。他唯一和五條悟最大的差別便是他懂得偽裝，而且還裝得有模有樣，沒有人不被他那副溫柔的模樣給騙去。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5VO4qeZlPx
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcXikNSdtv
我想我也被騙了。擅自以為在他心裡，自己的存在和別人是不一樣的；以為他說過「他總是會保護我」便是一輩子的事情。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8n8bmpSVzg
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtpPXmNr6t
我總是忘了那個「總是」，忘記自己不過是被選擇的那方，而他隨時可以將我踢出他的世界。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMgZDi5gQ8p
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OM1efHY5H
都說同類相吸，而我們不是同類。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVoQnxpWjqp
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCNXFwNBB2g
但我早該知道的。他那樣的人。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ883ZkbZbx
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMf8tZVe0Q
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQ4bL7cFLW
攔在身前的手臂強而有力，夏油傑曾經與我十指交扣過的右手此刻正覆在脖頸，原先順暢的呼吸隨著他加重的力道變得困難。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8G8OB0kuY7
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgw2N4XD15E
「你要求的。」他說，「明明可以不用這麼死得這麼痛苦。」156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqTmIIsCLP
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4IaP7ZOoIg
溢出的眼淚模糊視野。看不清倒映在鏡裡的畫面，也說不出隻字片語，連思考都費力，更枉論掙扎。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDLkWt9Yi0L
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO95xBGgd69
就這樣吧。156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡImItq9ERa3
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb6lvS04OS5
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtZXHmwSa01
156Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9jE4ocqrS
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