🤍 Jessica's POV 🤍
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It's past midnight on a friday, and I should be asleep or crying my heart out. Instead, I'm wide awake and elbow-deep in a family-sized bag of Doritos, staring at the amateur drawing in my hands.
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A small, silver moon shaped keychain.
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Gosh. I was really bad at drawing, but the memory stayed the same in my head thanks to this piece of reminder on faded paper.
I refused to redraw it as the years passed, fearing the version in my head would get altered as well, and I'd... forget.
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Coupled with the nuclear dumpster fire of my interview, I don't know how or what to feel.
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Does that mean the truck belonged to Valentus? Grandma had been vague about it when I asked her years ago. All she told me was it was a big company. She didn't want my head messed up at a young age.
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I sigh robotically, and meet the glare of my laptop screen, frowning. Because right there, sitting innocently in my inbox like it didn't just nuke my entire worldview, is an email from Valentus Technologies.
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Subject: Your Interview with Valentus Technologies
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I gulp.
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I know what this is. A rejection letter.
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The final nail in the coffin of my short-lived corporate villain origin story.
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I mean, to be honest, I butchered that interview. Completely. At one point, I think one of the interviewers physically and spiritually cringed at one of my answers. And then, there was the whole 'asylum-worthy' meltdown, which is definitely not something employers look for.
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So, yeah. There's no way in God's greasy hell this is good news.
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I take a deep breath and click on the email, already preparing myself for the usual 'we regret to inform you' crap.
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But instead...
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Dear Ms. Reed,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected for the Marketing Associate position at Valentus Technologies. You start on Monday.
Welcome to the team.
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I blink. What the fuck is this? Has my eyesight gotten worse?
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I squint at the screen, checking the name at the top, just to be sure this isn't some kind of clerical error.
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It's my name.
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This has to be a mistake, or a scam.
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I scroll down, expecting to find a paragraph that says, 'Oops, our mistake. Wrong Jessica!'
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Nothing. I reread the email three times. It still says the same thing.
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I have been hired.
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I think I stop breathing for a second because my vision goes a little fuzzy. Then, as if my body suddenly remembers how lungs work, I suck in a sharp breath, and let out a scream so loud it could wake the dead.
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Rachel comes flying into my room like I just announced the apocalypse, looking like an electrocuted raccoon.
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Poor baby.
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"What?!" She shouts, eyes wide "What happened?!"
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I whip my laptop around, my hands shaking. "I got the job!"
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Her eyes scan the email. Then she screams louder than the time she found a spider in her shoe. "Oh my God! You got it, Jess!"
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"What happened?! Did someone break in?!" Ken bursts in with a bat, looking around like he's ready to fight imaginary intruders.
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I laugh "I got the job"
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Ken snatches the laptop, reading the email with wide eyes. "No freaking way"
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Rachel shrieks again, and then we're all jumping and screaming like sugar-crazed toddlers on my bed.
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After we calmed down a bit, Rachel starts biting her fingernails like she always does when she's worried.
"Wait, are we sure they meant to hire you?"
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I shove her. "Gee, thanks."
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She grins. "I'm just saying, you were convinced you bombed that interview."
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I throw my hands in the air. "I DID!"
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"Then why did they hire you?" Ken asks, looking just as confused as I feel.
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I shake my head. "I have no fucking idea."
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Rachel narrows her eyes. "You sure you didn't blackmail someone?"
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"Who? The cleaners?"
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Ken rubs his chin. "Maybe they were so impressed by how bad you did that they were like, Wow, we've never seen someone fail so spectacularly. We have to hire her."
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Rachel nods. "Or maybe they felt bad because you almost passed out in the middle of the interview?"
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I groan. "Can we not analyze my humiliation? I got what looks to be a job. That's all that matters."
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Rachel stands up and gasps dramatically. "You know what this means?"
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Oh lord. Not again, please.
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"Shopping" Ken and I answer in unison.
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Rachel jumps up and down like a kid in a toy shop "I'm so excited! Ken, you're coming with us. We didn't go shopping for you when you got your job"
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Ken sighs, glancing briefly at me "Rach, I love you. But you really shouldn't be spending money like this. I promise I have more than enough stuff I don't even be wearing"
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Make no mistakes. He only says this because I'm giving him that eye mamas give their kids when they get offered food outside.
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"No no no. None of that nonsense. This is big!"
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"But..."
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I suddenly throw my arms up to stop the situation from escalating "Alright. Enough, guys. I'm tired and wanna go back to sleep. We'll figure things out tomorrow"
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Ken frowns "You weren't sleeping when we came in..."
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I lunge for a pillow, and they scatter out of my room like startled pigeons.
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Now, time for some much needed sleep.
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•••••
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It's monday, and turns out, it's not a glitch or a mistake. Cause I'm standing in the lobby of the tenth floor of Valentus Technologies, clutching a coffee that's 90% espresso and 10% existential dread, staring at a ceiling that's probably made of solid diamond. The walls are all sleek glass and holographic displays flashing things like 'Innovate or Get out' and 'Synergy is Oxygen'.
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A perky HR bot named Iris—yes, a bot— floats over, her pixelated smile blinding.
"Welcome, everyone. I'm Iris. Please follow me for orientation"
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Even her voice is charming. How cute.
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I clutch my new leather bag, and try not to gawk as I follow the other new hires to the orientation room.
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Iris leads us to a conference room where the chairs morph to our body shapes. I yelp.
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"Relax" says the woman beside me—Ashley, her name tag reads. She's rocking a faded 'My Chemical Romance' shirt under her blazer. "They're just... sentient furniture. Totally normal"
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Are they, now?
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I give her a thankful smile and shake my head "Thanks"
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I immediately sight Justine, Mark, and Priya, moving towards my side, looking for a seat.
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Oh my God. They made it!
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Of course they would. I mean, I'm here. Duh.
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I grin so wide, and wave to get their attention. On seeing me, their faces lit up and they hasten their steps.
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"Jessica! You're alive" Justine, tall redhead with sharp eyes and a pixie cut is the first to give me a teddy hug, followed by the other two. They look so good.
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"Barely" I wheeze.
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"I'm so glad you made it, Jessica." Priya cooed with her sweet tiny voice.
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Mark, all dimples and dad-energy, claps my shoulder. "We were worried after you ran out during the interview"
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They are about to seat down, but I quickly warn "Careful. Those chairs are sentient beings"
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But my warning did nothing. I hear cue synchronized yelps as their asses hit the shape-shifting seats. I bite my the insides of my cheek to stop the laughter threatening to escape.
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After they settle down, Justine speaks up "So" she says, smirking, "who else is internally panicking?"
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I raise my hand. We all do.
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A man comes into the room, and leads us to a room with over fifty seats, and lots of robots just moving around like it's their father's house. What's with these people and robots. Can't hire actual human beings?
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We get seated, and thus it begins.
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Orientation is insane. Forget boring PowerPoints—Valentus has holographic presentations. A voice-controlled AI assistant explains company policies and other boring stuff.
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Security access? Facial recognition, Iris scanning and Fingerprints. Even the coffee machines are touchscreen.
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We're shown AI that writes freaking Shakespearean sonnets about quarterly reports, told our ID badges can teleport us to meetings.
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"It's just advanced VR" Mark whispers when he sees our 'what the fuck' faces.
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We're handed matte black Valentus tablets and told they respond to brainwaves.
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Cap.
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"This is bullshit" I whisper to myself. The tablet flashes: Error. Please refrain from hostile words and thoughts.
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Aw. Hell nah. I immediately drop the possessed vessel, and look at Justine and Mark with wide eyes. Honey, I'm concerned.
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Justine shakes her head. "You too, huh?"
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Mark chuckles "Calm down, guys. It's just electroencephalography technology. Harmless"
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"Electro- what?" Justine scrunches up her nose like she just smelled something nasty.
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"Yeaaah, I don't consider words I can't pronounce harmless in any way, shape or form" I cross my legs.
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Priya leans over and whispers, "I feel like I should've read the terms and conditions before stepping into this building."
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"Same" I snort "Pretty sure I just sold my firstborn"
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•••••
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Towards the end of the orientation, we're assigned to various teams. I end up in Team 5, which is the Print and Media section in the Marketing Department. And guess who I see waltzing over my way?
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Justine! Super glad to have her with me.
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"Guess you're stuck with me" she says, smirking.
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I grin. "Good. I need a witness for when I inevitably set something on fire"
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Our Director, a man named Derek who looks like he's never tasted joy, drones about 'leveraging paradigm shifts'.
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Justine leans over. "If I have to hear 'disrupt' one more time, I'm disrupting his car tires"
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I stifle a laugh. Maybe I won't be the only one setting stuff on fire.
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Then I remember I need to call Grandma, and let her know baby girl is off the job market. I make a mental note to do that during my lunch break.
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