"Daddy," Sammie asked, looking up from the coloring pages her two older siblings mocked her for and to the couch her father sat on, as if a thought just occurred to her.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrurqSU4S7
"Yes, Sammie?" Her father said, tearing his eyes from a (what Sammie considered terribly boring) book, looking above the tips of his reading glasses to look at her.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25wD6jhQrY
"Where did you and Mommy meet?" Sammie tapped the crayon across her brow and clicked her feet together as she lay on the ground.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlSjZGqN1bP
Her youngest brother, Thaddeus, whipped his head to his father from the other side of the living room. His computer game would have to wait. For he wished to know the story for many years passed.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5eo3sYR99
Jordie, the oldest (and most stuck up, according to Thaddeus) brother smiled to himself quietly and pushed his glasses higher up his nose like a professional anime character. Oh yes, he knew the story. He'd just been biding his time and patiently waiting for his little sister to ask the Golden Question. According to him, it was he that planted the idea in little Sammie's head... but that was a story for another time- a story much less important than the one his father was ready to tell by the look on his face.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHc5kaR8hCx
Their mother walked in as if she too was counting down the minutes until the question was asked. Jordie's smile reflected on her own face. She sat elegantly next to her husband and placed her hand on his knee.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡglrOsodun0
The tension in the room rose when many seconds went by and the children started to become impatient. Except for Jordie, who still was doing that anime thing. He deserves an Oscar for that performance, seriously. He was still doing it. His mouth must be sore. But Jordie knew it wasn't. He had been working out his mouth for years now, waiting and preparing for this precise moment. Now was his moment. Now was his time to shine! Except for the fact that no one was even looking at him... but that didn't seem to bother him.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIXlor5GpgA
As the tension grew- "Well?" Thaddeus demanded impatiently, ruining the moment for everyone else, especially Jordie who definitely had his creepy anime smile down. "How'd you guys freaking meet already?" For he knew that he was just a character for some stupid story for a competition of a writing sight for nerds that he never heard about. FOR HE KNEW THAT HE WAS SUPPOSED TO KEEP IT PG! Also, his parents were right there.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmD4zfyqgYe
"Well," his father began, really dragging out the cinematic moment as he drew out a long, exasperated sigh, "It all started sixteen years ago today."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0sKRmWr3Li
"Well that was f***ing convenient," Sammie said, forgetting to keep it PG and shocking everyone in the room... except Jordie, who was still doing that stupid anime glasses smile thingy.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmNTvURjh1
"Indeed," her mother said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRE9crXS0h
"Also, you're grounded after this," the father said, still somehow remaining looking and sounding dramatic as he looked dramatically out the window.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0zV3aZFnu
"Indeed," his wife said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PGO6i7hXP
"Well," the father began his story, "Your mother and I were ready to settle down." Sammie could tell he was about to start to drone on, and she regretted asking him in the first place. "But one night we just said frick it," he winked to an imaginary camera like he was in The Office, "and both went to a bar."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQIB7vB2hMB
Sammie gasped.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgj85ChsCme
Thaddeus looked disappointed.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIh0NShU42o
Jordie smiled creepily.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHs2qyEnaU
"What?" Their father said, "Adultery is boring you know."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHMaW5VpGg8
"Indeed," his wife said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rhOp1Y63D
"Uhh, dad," Thaddeus said, "I'm pretty sure that's not what Adultery means."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcY8h00tCjt
"Nonsense," his father said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡReUEEW6sKW
"Indeed," his wife said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhsPlHO2q0
Jordie smiled creepily.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2S69HMfyU
"Okay, whatever," Thaddeus said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGw6ZHy5Gf
"Then we got very- very drunk." Their father laughed.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB9SkP4BviV
"INDEED," his wife said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXZAUipL10c
"We thought it would be funny to be criminals. That's how drunk we were." The children wondered if they were supposed to laugh, expect for Jordie, who still smiled creepily.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1rkGkBNOl
He continued, "So we did. We killed the bartender and stole all the money in the cash register."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuU0BfUea2C
"Wow... um okay. Very funny dad," Thaddeus said, noticing the scarred expression on Sammie's face.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqK7klUa7I3
"I'm not joking," his father said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nP8jNXHT1
"Indeed," his wife said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqIBIvWaVx
Jordie smiled creepily, for this was his favorite part.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2BkkcdC7I
"We soon realized this is what God made us for on his good Earth," the father said. Sammie and Thaddeus blinked repeatedly. Jordie smiled creepily.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjkXJXBfoB
He went on dramatically, "They sent a few cops to stop us. HA! As if that could stop us. We were uncontrollable. We fell in love right there."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYAstwlqDZ
"Okay, dad. That's cool. I think I'm satisfied now-" Thaddeus said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQAXLNOpIih
"I'm not done," he smiled almost as creepily as Jordie. "In fact, I'm only getting started." Jordie smiled.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06rTsIEWRz
"Oh great." Thaddeus sighed.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwAJqzIURY
"Indeed," his mother said happily. Thaddeus wondered how he never noticed his mother's limited vocabulary.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1DODMKVZG
"They sent SWAT after us, but we were always one step ahead. We set up landmines around for miles." Jordie smiled. His father still went on: "We killed hundreds that day. No day after was ever like that. For a whole year, we went on like this, pillaging and murdering. It was beautiful. And bloody, very bloody."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqAtKsG4Ly
"Indeed," his wife said.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmK27AVJPCY
"Finally, we were captured and brought to justice." He laughed, "Funny that they thought they could hold us. We killed all the guards and inmates and got out. And after living life to the fullest for another year or so, we settled down, and had all of you." He sighed and smiled.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYTPwshxQi
"HAH!" Thaddeus said, "I was waiting for you to admit it! Consider this your final bringing to JUSTICE! You think that I was just another, innocent, child? HAH! No. I was just biding my time! Waiting! Watching! You think Sammie asked you of her own accord? Of course not! Jordie actually planted that idea inside her head(Jordie smiled wider)! But guess who planted that idea inside of his head? (Jordie's smile finally vanished) You're all idiots! I was waiting for this moment for six years! Ever since the FBI recruited me into their forces when I was only three years old! I played my cards well, didn't I, father?" He ripped off a mask. He looked- exactly the same. His parents gasped. Jordie did, too, but he didn't know why.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5OMAxwXmRQ
"That's right, who could've guessed that the SWAT captain you thought you killed would actually be your son using a time machine! The one you named me after! Thaddeus! HAHA, that's right! You thought you were always ahead, but no! I was always ahead! I've been ahead sixteen years ago! I was there that night at the bar! I was listening! I was always listening! I've been listening all my childhood life! You think I've always been listening to music and you could talk about your crimes because you thought I couldn't hear? NO! The pair you bought me four years ago doesn't even work anymore! I DON'T EVEN LIKE PUNK ROCK ANYMORE!"835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0v2BY4g3w6
Gasps around the room.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhdHePCH93q
He continued, "Goodbye mother, father."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo2RtjABIcc
"Indeed," her voice was deathly quiet."835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiwzzoaG7v
"See you in hell, Mother f***ers!" Thaddeus said, forgetting that it was supposed to be PG. He pulled out a gun and killed his parents.835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SEkHu219q
The End
Why in the living hell did I write this?835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuxOT7y67r
Based off a true story835Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDV7bUXsJP
