chapter twelve
So it's been a day (if you're reading this on the same day you read the last chapter, you might want to wait until tomorrow for the best effect) and I had just gotten onto the boat back to the dock. I was feeling a bit better
it was better than nothing, what Ji
--no, shut up, not today. Anyways, I was feeling a bit better now that I had gotten some more rest, I actually woke up at a decent time and it didn't feel like my head was out to kill me, I could remember things like that Garrett Morgan had invented the traffic light and that Mario's backwards movement speed in Super Mario 64 does not have a speed cap like his forwards movement, which lets you climb the endless staircase and jump right over the trigger if done right. All handy, useful information I'm sure I need. The boat trip back to the dock was a lot quieter, there was nobody else on the upper deck. It was really peaceful, just watching the sky and the ocean as the boat pushed itself through both on a quiet, warm day. I looked over at the bag I brought with me. You didn't think I'd forget, would you?
As the boat approached the dock, I got off and walked into the back door of the welcome center. Nobody was at the desk. I tapped the bell, and sometime between then and the following second, Kroff was at the desk. "i did not expect you" he said.
"Hey, it's so nice to see you again! I was back on this side of town and figured I'd have to drop something off," I said as I handed him the towel he gave me back at the start of all this.
"you... you didn't have to do this..." he responded.
"I just figured--"
"No, you... you really didn't have to do this. I..."
He set the towel on a file cabinet behind the counter and wiped his arm across his eyes. "I..." he started, before clearing his throat, "what brings you back here"
"I'm headed to the library to look for some information about the Metatrain and take that up to Linus Linoleum to see what he can do about my old body being used to host the Nexus," I said.
"you learned an awful lot it would seem"
"Yeah, I guess I did! I never thought of it that way!"
"i wish you luck" he replied.
"Thank you!" I said, as I headed back out the door.
I passed by a row of shops and eventually came across the library, a rather nondescript building nestled between Mick Mundy's Discount Baseball Cards and a building worryingly labled "The Spangleton Project". As I stepped inside, I was overwhelmed with the number of books. Like, there were so many books. Like, a whole lot of them. Too many of them. I'd need to come up with a plan to tackle the library if I wanted to find the book I'd need on Linus' Metatrain. But which way should I go?
TO TAKE A LEFT, READ SECTION A.
TO TAKE A RIGHT, READ SECTION F.
A. TAKE A LEFT
I figured that I should start from the left side of the library and head right. I mean, I read left to right, so that makes sense in a place all about reading, right? I headed all the way to the leftmost wall and grabbed the first book I could from the shelf. Maybe it would help me.
TO TAKE A RED BOOK, READ SECTION B.
TO TAKE A BLUE BOOK, READ SECTION C.
B. THE RED BOOK
I grabbed a red book from off of the shelf to see just where we were starting. The Life and Times of our Dear Friend Linus... the rest of the title was obscured by some sort of suspense-raising smudge! I flipped through the book and found every instance of the man's last name was replaced with some greasy gray smear. I flipped through trying to find any hint, but all I could discover was that the man, this schrodinger's Linus, played Australian Rules Football in high school, inventing krumping and the Reverse Theremin, and once stapled his leg to a tow truck for twenty bucks. Was this Linus Linoleum? I'd need to take the book to a database to figure out. I approached the librarian to see if she could help me. "Hello, ma'am?" I asked.
"Huh? Yes, how can I--"
It was Memmi. I mean, it looked like Memmi, maybe it wa--"
"I'm Bit, the librarian. How can I help you, Tammy?"
"You... you know my name! Are you psychic?"
"What? No, I've been reading afterward. That, and exchanging letters with my sister, Memmi. She's been helping someone that matches your description exactly, so I took a guess. Now, how can I help?"
"I need your help. This book on Linus Whoever... is this Linoleum?"
"It's a book."
"No, like, is this about Linus Linoleum?"
She read a paragraph of it to herself, before closing the book. "Nope, not even close!" she replied.
"Oh..."
"This is Linus ᵂʰᵃᵗᵉᵛᵉʳ ʰᶦˢ ⁿᵃᵐᵉ ʷᵃˢ and he has no relation whatsoever to Linus Linoleum. Now, if you are looking for Linus Linoleum, all of his stuff is on the top floor, in its own special wing."
"How can we get there?" I asked.
"We're already here!" she replied, and I panicked.
I looked over the balcony, and sure enough we were at the top floor. I guess whatever this is is a familial thing between Memmi and her sister. "Let me get the door for you," she said.
"Oh, thank you!" I replied.
PROCEED TO SECTION K.
C. THE BLUE BOOK
I picked a blue book off of the shelf just to see where we were at. How to Love Yourself was the title. I mean, this wasn't Linus-related, but truth be told, I felt I kind of needed the book, in a way. Maybe I could finally shut up about Cal or make amends with him or something. I opened the book up.
"Why do you need this book? You're already adorable!" the first page read.
Gosh, I didn't know how to respond to that one. "I mean look at you, so small, so cute, so lovable..."
The more and more I read the book, the more it complimented me. Page after page calling me cute, small, precious, fun to be around... I was blushing furiously when I realized I had sunk about 100 pages into the book. I needed to put this down and get back to--
"Why put this book down, Tammy?" the next page read, "Someone as smart as you can read a book like this, and someone as special and adorable as you needs to know that she is loved!"
--what. The book's calling me out by name. The book's calling me out by name.
I couldn't get the book out of my hands, I think I needed someone's help. I started walking around reading the book as it called me a "soft, agreeable angel" and such, trying to find anyone who could take the book from me. "Hello?" someone said as I almost bumped into them.
"...help," I responded, thrusting the book towards them, still scanning across the page.
"You need help?" the person responded, "I mean, someone as wonderful and cute like you, someone who helps so man--"
"--please," I said to the person.
I couldn't take much more of this. My face was red hot from being showered in compliments like this and I was unbearably tingly. "Well, sure, I can help someone like you, I mean, you are just the cutest--"
I thrusted the book at them again, this time sorta kinda hitting them with the book. "Oh... the book? It's for me?"
"...yep," I lied, just trying to get the book out of my cute little--
--no, don't you go down that route! You're above this!!
"Well, alright."
They finally took the book, and I gave a very heavy exhale. All at once, everything changed. I never wanted to see tha--
"What a ripoff, it's blank. Here, just take it back!" the person responded as the book fell back into my hands.
Great, what do I do now?
TO ASK THE LIBRARIAN, READ SECTION D.
TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE, READ SECTION E.
D. THE LIBRARIAN HELPS ME
I approached the librarian for help. I didn't know her personally, but I knew she looked quite a bit like Memmi. I think they're related, even. "Hello," I said.
"Ah, you're that... Tammy person that my sister helps, aren't you? She sends me letters all the time. The name's Bit, I run the library. So, how can I...?"
She trailed off when she saw just how precious I was, holding my little-- no, you stop that, let me write my own asides, I don't need the help of some telepathic metafiction.
"Ah... alright, so what do you have here?" Bit said as she looked at the cover, "How to Love Tammy? Is that some sort of new arrival that--"
"No! I... I can't get it out of my hands."
"Sounds like a personal problem."
"It is!"
"Well, you can only check out one book at a time, was that in the 'Cursed Books' section? You'd need a book you'd really want to get rid of that. What were you here for?"
"A book on Linus," I said, trying to obscure my blushing over the adorable description of me on page 234.
"Well, Linus' books... those are all upstairs. You could take the elevator, but I think that might just lead to a whole bunch of other mischief. You look embarrased enough in your current state as it is. Though I will admit, very cu--"
"Just please help," I stammered out.
"Why do you need my help, we're already here!"
Ah, so it seems that terrible pacing for the sake of comedic effect runs in the family. Bit opened the door for me to Linus' wing. It was a dark room lit by very dim orange lights. I reached for a book off the shelf. The Life and Times of Linus Linoleum, it said. Suddenly, I found myself putting the other book down, and Bit scooped it up in a plastic bag. "I'm going to go burn this thing, if you need me," she responded.
"Thank you!" I replied.
PROCEED TO SECTION K.
E. A SECOND OPINION
I needed help from someone, anyone, and in a panic I just started roaming the floor looking for someone who could lend a helping hand to someone this adora...
No, no, it's happening, it's creeping into my asides! I need help now. Suddenly, I bumped into someone. "Ｈｅｙ, ｗｈｏ ｄｏ ｙｏｕ..." they started, but suddenly I felt myself being grabbed, hoisted over the other person's head, and carried around a corner.
"Tams? What are you doing here? And what are you reading?"
It was Shim! I was a little relieved that it was someone who already thought I was cute. I mean, I am, I'm adorable, a tiny littno, you're not doing this to me!
"So, eh... Tams? You there?"
"Oh, eh..." I started, before leaning in a bit, "I need some help."
"What kind of help ya need, Tams?"
"This book... it's stuck to me."
"Uh... huh... Tams, I'm gonna stop you there, it's easy to let go of a book."
"No, this one's... cursed, I keep reading it and it's just describing me in a cuter and cuter way..."
"Well, you are pretty adorable--"
"please help"
"Right, right... um, how could I..."
"Just take it."
"Oh! Right, I..."
"You're... um, hugging me."
"Oh, sorry Tams! I must have missed!"
"It's a book! It's not going anywhere--"
"I'm trying, Tams! Gosh, you're..."
I was about to break. I can't blush harder, I was beyond flustered by this, just a cute little helpless no, get out of here, I will turn this story around, don't test me
"Right," Shim began, "alright, here goes..."
I very intently watched as she grabbed the middle of the book and lifted it out of my hands. All at once, it felt like a ton of pressure was lifted off of me, and she tossed the book to the ground in a panic. "Thanks, Shim, I..." I started,
"Ah, it's whatever," Shim replied, "anything for you! Now, about this book, you should probably hand it back to the libraria--"
"No, I'm not touching that book!" I replied.
"Um... here, hold this one, then!"
She handed me A Technical Guide to Riftwalking, and then handed mea book just titled The Scoopin' Book: For When You Just Gotta Scoop, Y'know?, and then pointed at the seemingly cursed book. "Now just go, eh... scoop it up with the books!"
"Um, alright?"
I picked up the book with the other books, and even though it was closed I could still tell it was radiating some squishy positivity my way, it tingled just to be that close to it. "And I'll go find a librarian!" Shim said as she bolted off.
I double checked I wasn't touching the book at all, and sighed, waiting for Shim to return. When she did, someone vaguely familiar was with her. "So, Tammy, huh? Strange meeting you here," the librarian said.
"Memmi?" I replied.
"Yeah... no, that's my sister, the name's Bit. The Lizi told me about what had happened, I came to take the offending article off your hands.
I set the trio of books down carefully, and pushed the top one off. "It's that one, the one in the middle."
"Huh," Bit replied, "yeah, that's a cursed book alright. Well, I can, eh... dispose of this, was there anything else I can help with?"
"Yes, actually! I'm looking for books about Linus Linoleum!"
"Those are all upstairs. Lizi, can you--"
"I have a name!" Shim replied.
"I have trouble remembering names, whatever. Can you put those two books back? Actually, stick them in the return cart, makes us look like people love reading our books. Throw a few more in the stack, even!"
"Uh, sure," Shim responded, knocking a shelf of books onto the floor and picking them back up.
"As for Linus' wing, that's all... here!"
"Whuh?!" I replied.
We were upstairs. I have no idea how we were suddenly here, but we were. As Bit unlocked the wing, I thanked her.
PROCEED TO SECTION K.
F. TAKE A RIGHT
So M and L are near the end of the alphabet, so it'd figure that a book about Linus Linoleum or the Metatrain would be near the right side of the library if everything is alphabetized! I started walking all the way to the end of the library, but was stopped by someone. They looked kinda odd, they were white and shiny and looked like plastic but also looked really soft and approachable. "Hey!" they exclaimed.
"Hi...?" I responded.
"So, like, maybe you could help me with something?"
"Um... what do you need help with?"
"So, like, I've been reading this book about magic, alright? And I kind of want to know if maybe I'm doing this right?"
I almost exclaimed something in shock about there being magic, but that's honestly small potatoes compared to everything else that's happened in this gosh-forsaken story. I needed to find that book, but they also really needed the help. I don't know.
TO HELP HER, READ SECTION G.
TO CONTINUE LOOKING FOR THE BOOK, READ SECTION J.
G. ASSISTING THE MAGICIAN
"Sure, I'll help," I said.
"Oh, that's great! Here, stand right here, and close your eyes!"
"Um, alright, I don't--"
"└──┤╚╬╬═╣!!"
"What type of symbols are--" I began, before suddenly feeling like I was struck by lightning.
It was a rush of pain all at once, I didn't have much time to react to it, because all at once it vanished. "So... what did it do?"
"I, uh... I don't know," they responded, "how do you feel?"
"I, uh... odd, I think is the right word?"
"Huh... wait, hold on, let's try something else."
"What?"555Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8loqm1qFL8
"Okay, good, keep going."
"With what?"
"Maybe just one more, just to be sure..."
"Could you tell me what's going on?" I asked.
"Yes! Yes, it worked! Not what I wanted to cast, but it worked!"
"What worked?"555Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHYWXAhD1e
"The enchantment of confusion! You can kinda only ask questions for a while. Sorry, I don't know how to fix that one," they said.
"I can...? So can I...?" I started.
"I mean, you can try! What brought you in today!"
"I'm here for a book... I think it's about Linus? Or the Metatrain?"
"Oh, I know where that might be!" they responded.
"Oh, you do? And I don't think I ever caught a name?" I responded.
"Oh, it's Swiff! And the books about Linus are held up on the top floor, in their own little room."
"How would I get there?" I asked.
"Well, there's an elevator over there, you take that up to the top floor, and then just sign in!"
"Okay... should I thank you?"
I think I knew the answer to this one once? Wait, is this spilling into my asides now? Do I gotta deal with this? When does this wear off?
"Oh, it's no problem! And hey, if I ever find out how to actually use any of the other ones, I'll make sure to let you know!"
"Do I want to try more of these?" I asked.
"Of course you do!" Swiff replied.
"I do?"
"Yep! See ya!"
What even just happened? I guess I should head for the elevator, shouldn't I? But yet even when I press the button, nothing happens? Is it broken? What next?
DO I LOOK FOR THE STAIRS? READ SECTION H.
CAN SOMEONE ELSE HELP ME? READ SECTION I.
H. WHERE ARE THE STAIRS?
I think I needed to find some stairs? That might help? Should I wander around the perimeter of the building? Why wasn't I finding anything? Is this door it? How about this second door? This third door? Why was there a big glass tube in that room? Is this the stairs? How about this? How does anyone get to the top floor? Is this it? Why is there another door behind this door?
Why is this the door to the stairs?!
Is Linus' stuff up here? "Hey there!" someone said, but from where?
"Huh?"
"I just, uh, just noticed you there. The name's Squick," the guy said, "and I saw your run in with that amateur spellcaster. It's a shame what's happened to you, but I can reverse spells, you know! Maybe you might consider my services during, say, a... date?"
"What?! Get lost!" I replied.
Wait, that wasn't a question! That shocked me out of it, that was fortunate! I pushed past the guy and eventually came to another set of stairs that led right to the top, and there was the door to Linus' wing. Perfect!
It was locked. Curses! I'd need someone who can unlock doors for me, maybe the
"Librarian?" a voice behind me said.
"Yes, exactly, a librarian! Wait, hold up, did I...?"
I turned around, and someone not unlike Memmi was standing before me. "The name's Bit, you probably know my sister."
"Yes, actually! I--"
"She sends letters. Anyways, you're here for the key to Linus' wing of the library, aren't you?"
"Yes, do I need to complete some test, or..."
"Yes!"
"What do I need to do?"
"...stand back, while I open the door for you."
"Oh. Oh! Thank you, I--"
"It's nothing. Just tell Memmi she owes me money."
PROCEED TO SECTION K.
I. WHERE CAN I FIND HELP?
Who would want to help me? I should think this through, shouldn't I? Maybe the librarian? Where could she be?
"Right here!"
"Oh, can you help me?"
"What are you looking for?"555Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpvx5qHVFAs
"Well, I think I'm cursed? Everything I say is questions, and I don't think it's normal?"
"That's... that's off, yeah. Well, what else were you looking for?"
"Do you have anything on Linus Linoleum?"
"Yes, right here!" she said.
"Gah! We're... we're all the way up here! How?!"
"Truth be told, I think the author's been spending six hours writing this chapter thus far, and you can probably tell this is the last one they've got to write before they can move on."
"But... But I'm not asking questions anymore!" I replied.
"Yeah, yeah, the jarring transition shocked you out of it, something something can we just move on to you galavanting in Linus' part of the library?"
"Oh, uh, sure! Thanks, eh...?"
"Bit, you can call me Bit. You might know me sister, Memmi."
"Oh, yeah! She helps me out! Kind of, she mostly drinks and says things, though."
"Yeah, that's her. Am I just going to hold this door open all day, or...?"
"Oh, right!"
PROCEED TO SECTION K.
J. NEVERMIND
"Sorry, I'm busy," I reply.
"Oh, okay. Hey, wait, hold up!"
I froze in place. I don't know why I did, I was kind of scared. "Oh, it worked!" they exclaimed.
I needed to go, I needed to leave. "What are you so in a rush about?" they asked me.
"I'm looking for a book on Linus Linoleum, and the Metatrain."
"Oh, that's all upstairs! You can take the elevator over there to get up there, but it might be out."
That'd be good to know. "Okay, how else can I get upstairs? I mean, I'd assume if it's 'upstairs', then there's a set of stairs I can take, wh--"
"Well, wait, hold on, maybe this will work?"
"Are you ju--"
Before I could finish my accusation, they vanished, and things looked different. The library was empty, the walls were still there, but the books and shelves were gone and the floor had become tile instead of the carpet that lined the I was on the ceiling wasn't I
Yep, it had seemed that the budding magician had somehow gotten me stuck to the ceiling. That said, Just above (below?) me was a room with a sign that read "ƃuᴉM snuᴉ˥ ǝɥ┴"
I didn't do that right, wait, hold on. "The Linus Wing". There. I was right there, I just needed to get off of the ceiling. "Wh... hello? Are you alright?" someone above (below?) me said.
"Hello, who are you... wait, Memmi?" I asked.
"No, actually, I'm her sister though. Bit's the name, and you're on... you're on my ceiling."
"Yes! I, um actually don't want to be up here anymore, but if I fall..."
"Eh, you'll be fine. Get off the ceiling now."
"Wait, I--555Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvH1GbTFIsI
And suddenly I was back on the floor some ten feet down. Hurt like mad to land, but the pain vanished rather quickly. "So, who are you?" Bit asked.
"Tammy Wilson, eh, I think, I've been seeing--"
"--Memmi about you losing your memory, yes. She's told me about that one, we've been exchanging letters for a while. If you're looking to get into Linus' wing, I can open the door for you."
"Oh, thank you!" I replied.
PROCEED TO SECTION K.
K. LINUS LINOLEUM'S COLLECTION
I was finally here, Linus Linoleum's personal collection. It was a massive room. I turned to Bit. "Did he write all these?" I asked.
"Every one."
I picked up a book. The Useless Things™ Product Catalogue was written across the top. "Ah, yes, Useless Things™, his old company before he began work on the afterward."
I flipped through the catalogue. Products like The DVD Rewinder™ and the Doodad™ Deluxe™ lined the pages. "Does it defy physics?" I read out of one of the product descriptions, "Let go of the Astroball™ and watch it race towards the center of the earth, but come to a stop when it hits any object. Hours of fun! Hours of fun? That's... that's just what gravity does?"
"His first plans weren't all that great. Or they were genius, if you're a scam artist."
"Huh."
I put it back and grabbed another book. The Realization of Meta-Realities. I flipped open to a page and began reading.
"I now understand the weight I wield. The world as we see it is limited to our perception. If you are wired, from the first minute, to see the color red and think of the word 'grease', then eventually you'll just call the color grease. If your world hinges on everything you see equaling real, physical matter, would it work in reverse? Would being conditioned to experience certain events, certain locations and people make them real in the mind's eye?"
...No, no it doesn't! "Bit, is Linus, eh...?"
"Unhinged! Probably. I haven't actually worked with him, but from what I've read he's pretty wild to deal with. He's by far the strongest metamancer of the bunch. He can literally rewrite reality as he wants."
"That's... a lot of power..."
"I mean, he uses it very responsibly, though! He's just and fair, he's very smart."
"Did he rewrite..."
"Huh?"
"...nothing"
I grabbed another book off the shelf. The Train of Imagination. Is this the Metatrain? I flipped through and sure enough, it was. "When your perception catches a glimpse of a train that's real to it, and your brain visualizes a train it doesn't see, when your body expects the doors, the seats of a train, the train has become real to you."
"So... the train isn't real..."
"Yes, that's right. It is, but it isn't. It's part of metamancy. Linus invented it as it exists in the afterward. It bleeds in every direction, and with every new layer of the afterward, every attempt to seal the Nexus, the bounds get weaker, things change. One iteration, you're a family of a man, a woman, and a baby. Next iteration your child has married a puppet and has a lizard daughter. Next iteration she's grown up and developed laser vision, had a run-in with a robot, was made half-cat, learned how to speak in a font 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕝𝕠𝕠𝕜𝕤 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 and is in a three-way relationship with a computer program and someone who's part text-based adventure. I mean, the people of the afterward seem to like it, but as this place expands, things keep going a bit more corrupt than the iteration before, you have to wonder where the breaking point is. When will everyone collapse into a pile of polygons, missed opportunities, regrets, thoughts, shapes, matter abstract..."
I didn't know how to react. "Anyways, Tammy, I hope that book finds you well. I can't loan it out, it's a collector's item, but I can get you a scan of it. Follow me."
"Okay, thanks. Hey, um... up above, the-- the, uh, the choose a story thing?"
"What about it?"
"Why was that there?"
"Were you daunted by your choices?"
"Yes, I was, but..."
"And you wanted to explore every option, did you not?"
"I guess, but--"
"What else is there?"
"Which path did I take? Which path happened?"
"I mean, which one led you here?"
"No, which one's... um... which one's canon?"
"...Oh. Oh, all of them."
"What?!"
"Yeah, they all happened to you in some form."
"I feel like I already forgot all about that, though!"555Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEKtV2Zckc
"Trust me, the author hasn't. He's already told one of his friends he isn't doing another one of these. But yes, every path was written, so every path happened."
"Uh..."
"Well, here you are, a scanned copy of that book. It's a copy, so I don't expect it back. Just, eh... just come back and rustle some books around, put some in the return cart in, like, two weeks. Makes us look busy."
"I could have Shim do that!"
"Sure, why not. Nice call-back."
"Um... thanks?"
Bit kinda pushed me out the door, and it was already sunset. As I approached the boat coming in to the docks, Kroff was sitting at a bench, staring into the sun. "Oh, it's you!" I exclaimed.
"Little one, I've been thinking... about your journey," he began.
Whoa, using capital letters and punctuation, this is weird. "You've learned so much about the... the Afterward... in so little time. I still remember when we found you. I walked into work that day and you were wet and looked so sad and lost, hopeless, trying to find your body. And now here you are. So smart, so well-versed, so well cared-for. I... I wish you Luck, Tammy. You've Inspired me. I've... I've been looking at new ways to express myself, to find my own True North, following my own Internal Compass... and it's because of You."
"You... you really like the capital letters--"
"And you're so Thoughtful. It warms my Heart so, so much. I..."
He was on the verge of tears. "Can I tell you my story?"
"Uh... this chapter's already at 4,856 words, but..."
"No, you're right... maybe another time. You should head home, get some Rest. One of your friends... Shim, her name? She was telling me about you. She told me that when you show up to visit her, her head gets filled with ❤a whole lot of ❤❤joy❤❤ like this❤ and she just can't get it out fast enough. You make people so happy. I hope you know that."
"Um... thanks, Kroff. Well, you have a good evening, I guess I'll be back another day."
"No, take your time. I could mail a Letter, too, if that's alright."
"Sure, if that works for you. Good night, Kroff."
"Thank you for being someone whose story helps me have good nights, Tammy."
ns 15.158.61.42da2
