神與畜 - 重性憂鬱疾患17

「回來了。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNSnoYtqAB
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「爺爺回來了。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2HWmzADF6U
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「失敗了嗎？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1onquRiYF
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「看起來失敗了。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ01bdb9iHyJ
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時間倒回幾天前，被NAGI重傷的李仲翔，回到了李晴煬的意識空間。正如NAGI所料，李仲翔早就對李晴煬出手，但出於某些原因，李仲翔無法立刻吞噬他，造就了此時此刻，他快被自己孫子煩死的窘境。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVHhk0SVKFG
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「哪，爺爺。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMXux3qJTNA
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「你打不贏我哥嗎？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0dPD0Uzdh
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「哥明明那麼弱。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghWpwNzR2Z
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「爺爺不是很強嗎？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXaE4zkRX0
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李晴煬的意識空間很奇怪，是一片一望無際的花田、一分為二，分別是白玫瑰與紅玫瑰，兩種玫瑰園各有一個李晴煬。因為都是小孩子的模樣，他們在胸前別了各自代表的玫瑰，區分彼此。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkoG9KQDX19
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「啊，難不成，」紅玫瑰說：「是因為MIO？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuoRhyQDTvN
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白玫瑰疑惑，「MIO？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOIQ398ZVh
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紅玫瑰解釋：「她和哥交換，問題應該出在這。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdX1ZqZ2maM
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一樣的長相、聲音，兩個李晴煬此起彼落地交談。李仲翔坐在一張木椅上，快被他們吵死。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWluWG3DpQ
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為什麼無法吞噬？很簡單，李仲翔無法主動殺死他們──這是規則，只能讓他們自殺，也是他另外找上李博洋的原因。李晴煬是主目標，但這兩朵玫瑰太棘手，李博洋相較之下容易些，可惜最後被NAGI阻撓。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk02L74tAg6
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「你們兩個，到底怎麼回事？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QuA9psunK
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不知為何，李仲翔回趟仙境後，竟然換了衣服，變成一套暗紅色的西裝，前面的頭髮也梳了上去，依舊散發不切實際的氣質，不像這個世界的人類。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMH4TQJE9tk
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「我記得我剛來時，」李仲翔指著白玫瑰，「沒有他。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofSVJrsJUz
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「不是『沒有他』，是他在『睡覺』。」紅玫瑰糾正，可愛的笑容問李仲翔：「爺爺好像拿我們沒轍。怎麼樣？要告訴你嗎？關於我們的秘密。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJHdXii02m
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李仲翔沒有回話。和驚慌失措的李博洋不同，紅白玫瑰仗著李仲翔無法殺他這點，根本不怕他，還敢用挑釁的口氣說話，這讓李仲翔很生氣。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNIAFZnfWU
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李仲翔問他們：「為什麼有兩個？你是雙重人格？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEXYF9kCnv
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「不，跟那不一樣。」紅玫瑰說：「我們是李晴煬的兩個面相。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VprbuOfux
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「面相？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8FGuEZlo7
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紅玫瑰指著白玫瑰，「他，從李晴煬出生就在了。他來自『紅心傑克』，跟爺爺有直接關係，是『缺愛』、是李晴煬渴望被愛的面向。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXZyxW7ul4u
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紅玫瑰再指自己，「我，是因為小叔的愛而誕生。我要將小叔給我的愛獻給他人、讓那個人變幸福，我是『泛愛』、是李晴煬渴望愛人的面向。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuYLugxP0g
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言下之意，紅玫瑰來自斯德哥爾摩症候群，但李仲翔看向白玫瑰，這小鬼沒比較正常，笑起來跟紅玫瑰一樣邪惡。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVqYWZoUTd7
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「我們照著時間順序說吧。爺爺，你有讀過我的記憶嗎？」換白玫瑰開口。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtesIV54LV
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李仲翔點頭。白玫瑰繼續說：421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCg0uX1TKn9
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「因為被蜘蛛襲擊，李晴煬失去記憶，忘記小叔對自己做過的事，也就是說──紅玫瑰被遺忘，當時由我負責主導。之後，紅玫瑰回來，李晴煬記憶恢復，並把小叔殺死。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bLcxGGMVn
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他們一搭一唱，紅玫瑰接著說：421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhoaUiybAbG
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「但是，李晴煬選擇和MIO交換──以『白玫瑰沉睡』為代價，得到成人的外表。交換後，白玫瑰睡著，這也是爺爺當初到來時，只有我在的原因。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0vCTcO0bYY
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李仲翔聽懂了，怪不得李晴煬獲得成人外表後，行為舉止整個劣化，原來都是紅玫瑰在主導。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmU9vSCPOD
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「問題來了：為什麼一開始的紅玫瑰不快樂？為什麼一提到小叔就跳腳？答案很簡單。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZhd0Ydmol
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白玫瑰甜蜜一笑，「因為李晴煬對小叔不是恨，『恨李央』不符合紅玫瑰『愛人』的本質。這點我們要感謝尼可拉斯和宇維少爺，一個幫李晴煬點出問題，一個帶李晴煬去小叔的墓前認清事實，這才解開矛盾，李晴煬也不再糾結小叔的事。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNowOu07SlQ
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提到李央，紅玫瑰的表情就很幸福。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkhqfLswXC
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紅玫瑰說：「獅鷲不愧是獅鷲，她在謝氏點破李晴煬『缺愛』的事實，讓白玫瑰醒了過來，真的很厲害。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5iDBeLqbII
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「我明白了，也就是說──」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaaPLomxDp9
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李仲翔發出那聲很像呻吟的嘆息，壓低聲音：421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68an7bdcDt
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「我要得到這副身體，你們都得死。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYU3EUu4TsB
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「或者，」白玫瑰壞笑，「讓我們同時滿足、合而為一。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7YqJPy1st
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紅玫瑰也笑，「滿足我們愛人的慾望，與被愛的渴望。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wVsy9tUs3
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白玫瑰說：「因為小叔不在了──」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19X6eX7NZB
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紅玫瑰也說：「因為我們都不滿足──」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjV02DsCJVh
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兩雙手牽在一起，兩個聲音重疊在一起。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0VPhRxOWl
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「才不會聽爺爺的話，乖乖去死喔。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6teMvDbTIT
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遇到對手了。李仲翔覺得頭好痛。該說不愧是自己的繼承人嗎？棘手程度真不是蓋的。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOjGrhDd2L
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「……我知道了。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3V4JNXuhwA
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他把手放下來，紅色的眼睛看著兩個小鬼。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1ZiGY0PrA
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「現況來看，我殺不死你們，你們也無法趕我走。我們還得相處一段時間。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxRhOPgOZE
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「沒錯。」白玫瑰燦爛一笑。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqTqFhRl6Z
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「就是這樣。」紅玫瑰表示認同。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqNxPxORjnX
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「在你們找到愛的對象前，我會把力量借給你們，但是──」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSBGW5qdTR
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李仲翔睜大血紅色的眼睛，下重話：421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWotzAhpq1j
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「滿足後，都給我立刻去死，聽懂了嗎？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLc8oy16L0
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「聽懂了。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnv0DgXR6dH
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「知道了。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVGwnBhfeeN
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「我們會聽爺爺的話。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wERhzx91J
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「爺爺，還請多指教。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7gPjlzW0q
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說完，兩朵玫瑰走上前，同時牽住李仲翔的手，歡迎爺爺加入美麗的玫瑰花田，成為李晴煬的一部份。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtySjhh5iP1
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2157年12月2日，凌晨兩點，仙境大樓，二層421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡshcvTXTeiv
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時間倒回高宇維與李博洋談話的隔天凌晨。因為MIO不想一個人睡，李博洋陪她在榻榻米打地鋪，但因為白天的談話，李博洋睡不著，只好趁MIO熟睡時離開房間，走去二樓的醫務室。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz0VHM0cu4k
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因為沒開燈，黑漆漆的醫務室裡，只有李晴煬一個人躺在病床。明明心電圖、其它有的沒的都正常，李晴煬就是醒不來，已經昏迷了兩個月。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBE5cjT27N
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「弟弟……」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddfCcoxG3E
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李博洋坐在病床邊，看著李晴煬的睡臉，又想起白天和高宇維的談話。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWgpmWGNMJ
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「對不起，要不是哥哥，你根本不會加入神與畜，也不會遇到這些事。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7b5PlwtA2M
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李博洋開口，告訴沉睡中的李晴煬：421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvzOhdqL5z
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「我知道，我最多只能帶MIO走，你絕對不會想離開。依你的個性，一定會為了宇維少爺死吧？因為你是優秀的神與畜，相較之下，哥哥我竟然會陷入這種難題……枉費我還是你的嚮導，真諷刺。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukib5TCivp
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李博洋走到窗戶邊、兩手放在窗台，一邊看著外面的夜景，繼續說：421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1GGGOImNG9
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「我知道我沒有選擇，就算離開神與畜，爺爺還是會找上你，我不管選什麼都無法保護你。而且，MIO這樣的存在和個性，無法融入外面的世界。我不能為了一件百分之百會失敗的事，拋棄MIO和宇維少爺。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvJGk00ZMk
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說著說著，李博洋的拳頭越握越緊，眼淚無聲無息掉下來，落在窗台上。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ622X8uX5Jj
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「什麼是稱職的神與畜──無論天秤的另一端是誰，都會選擇宇維少爺，我也確實要這麼做；但為了『正確』捨棄你，光憑這點，我就極度厭惡我自己。為什麼犧牲的是你的幸福？為什麼我這麼優柔寡斷？換成別人會淪落至此嗎？為什麼我和你要面對這種事……為什麼……」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡggxOwiZBCR
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人無法選擇出生，無法選擇命運；怎麼努力都改變不了現狀，才是真正的絕望。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ73wjOxJtp0
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李晴煬生來就是紅心傑克的繼承者，李博洋無法改變它，只能心痛地接受事實，然後，絕望地目睹它發生。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYB43TeZvGD
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPmOjpDI3W
他在窗台哭了很久。為了以神與畜的身分存活，李博洋必須拋棄其它情感。他這一哭，哭掉了自己對弟弟的所有感情。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3HhYQ1CfS2
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bLuz9SgBR
他已經長大，不需要與MIO交換，也不用仰賴遺忘，此刻的他學會自我切割──將心臟多餘的部分切除。當不必要的情緒不再左右自己，李博洋也完成了蛻變，停住了眼淚。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1v1lrRg1Qn
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPs2cCZwT4I
「呼……」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqsV7tb3eAT
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpYyrfk7I3
他深吸一口氣、吐出來，再慢慢睜開眼睛。他不知道自己此刻規律的心跳，該歸類為平靜或是死寂。總歸來說，李博洋冷靜下來，理性主導腦袋。清晰的思緒叫他趕快回去，萬一MIO發現自己不在，一定會大哭大鬧。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Eql7O83xJ
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElC8mXDPzu
他轉身，正打算離開醫務室，李博洋的眼角餘光瞄到什麼，於是他移動視線──肩膀猛然一陣、後退三步，睜大的眼睛瞪著前方，好不容易規律的心跳又開始狂奏。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7RvY0PW11
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxlCCXfhsB
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1rJuwNqkn
李晴煬醒了。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEz2tqE4woF
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjoX0jVYqmd
不知道什麼時候醒了。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlR0AjTYgYC
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9H6AOB9l7n
他坐在床上，面無表情。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRyKaeFLmZX
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDKnjyGWqE
血紅色的眼睛看著，無聲無息。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ94rfuhG150
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQwE5R5TFh
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2FRR1pRU7
「弟弟……？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9AWUufRtYo
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsNYFtyXWN
你看我，我看你，兩雙紅色的眼睛看著對方，過了好久。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0K9m6dpOh
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpeSptwWqr
「不……不對，你是誰？」假海龜的鐵扇出現在右手。李博洋拉起警戒，質問：「你是李仲翔，還是，我弟弟？」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPHFTkuCRy
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymhSCAHvqs
「……。」421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2Re10IoCd
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXEKeh6pc1
李晴煬沒有回答，而是笑了。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdXF6p4tjPg
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnnG7j4YrBt
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvRyhzvD6s
像被鮮血污染的紅玫瑰。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEotQVEhBg
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryziKOxysr
像被精液褻瀆的白玫瑰。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfO5qI65z5u
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriA6Zz6VMY
像從撲克牌裡誕生的惡魔──代號為J。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FQRiKmdOT
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL85mCagGAM
全名：紅心傑克。421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFh7zhisvn
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZwrQu44i9
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkS7ttMZrhu
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5Fd5xqeNn
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9AdhdbjA47
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNSafod1W8k
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVE14yh1i0h
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVfVkBFNf8
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHlpROTmOL
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjKlJyNgOAQ
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHFC69bxHq
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4yZEcZc5gQ
421Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡco04wL6euZ
重性憂鬱疾患 End