神與畜 - 夢魘症11

一切都要從升高中的暑假說起。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPms3YmkbI
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「笙，這禮拜六有空嗎？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHXPTxOIZf
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBX0tWD31rL
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爸爸說，禮拜六要跟他的再婚對象吃飯，在台北。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NbJT9dRtx
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「要穿很正式嗎？」我問。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzME5D8XPeG
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「普通襯衫就好。不是多高級的餐廳，太正式反而讓對方不自在。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8b9vk599qH
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJD4n9tyKx
爸爸對我當時的反應應該很欣慰。對於他再婚，我沒有意見，對新媽媽的要求也不高，別像之前那個一樣、愛上別的男人就行。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36WBV24Q0D
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之後要和新媽媽一起住，趁現在熟悉一點比較好，我抱著這樣的想法赴約，穿了件普通的藍色襯衫，但一到現場我就後悔，因為爸爸沒有跟我說，現場還有妳。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt9QxEWbxoz
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「她叫白絃。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4B0eyyl11P
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「我的女兒，也是你未來的姊姊喲。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpn3m4C4KH
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡclbWJMI77Z
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如果爸爸事先告訴我，我就不會挑最討厭的藍色，而是我喜歡的粉紅色襯衫。因為爸爸對顏色的刻板印象，我一直不敢穿它，我就是這麼膽小的人；如果那時我鼓起勇氣，或許就能和妳開啟「喜歡粉紅色」的共同話題，而不是互用尷尬卻不失禮貌的微笑看著對方，應付這場聚會。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtcVzKg9W4
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妳大我七歲，已經出社會工作，是成熟的大人，言行舉止均符合社會標準，但我知道妳在忍耐，因為我從妳身上嗅到跟我一樣的味道，我們臉上都戴著虛偽的笑臉面具。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg40J15Bssz
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不過，妳應付社交場合的經驗比我多，和爸爸的互動十分自然；相較之下，我像有社交障礙的高中生，常常不知道怎麼接話，但新媽媽把我的沉默歸為乖巧，莫名對我讚譽有加。我們的餐局在怪異的和諧中結束，兩個月後，我們搬去妳們的房子，由法律維繫的重組家庭就這麼拉開序幕。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9U2R4A6ULR
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0C0yBp4Po
爸爸再婚的決定是對的，不只減輕他養育我的壓力，有媽媽的感覺也很不錯，至少每天放學都有三菜一湯的晚餐，而不是一邊吃爸爸買回來的便當，一邊滑手機、看「媽媽」跟陌生叔叔吃飯的打卡照片。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZegRPClSwO
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「我來幫忙吧。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFtaBIO7Vyb
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回家時，媽媽都還在廚房，我通常會去幫忙，比如擺餐具。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtzXiN4FRC
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「笙，拿三副碗筷就好囉。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswec7FIeO6
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNlzwYujfWW
爸爸七點前一定到家，少掉的那副碗筷不是他。我問媽媽：「姊姊不回來吃嗎？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQCt4t8yfl
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2FuQvSadM
「她工作很忙，常常加班到很晚。」媽媽說。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpkJqRiKYG
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「姊姊做什麼工作？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjRd1PLHJU
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8p5PFn1QtA
「一間藥廠的助理，詳細我沒問。」媽媽說：「你姊姊大學讀政治，畢業後失業了半年，我原本想逼她考公務員或研究所，幸好她最後找到了這個工作。雖然常加班，但看在薪水高、給家裡生活費很多的份上，我就懶得說她，畢竟每次跟你姊姊講話，我都會被氣得半死。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl7I0d14gfb
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHhVyR6ayA
媽媽對妳有很多不滿，我知道，因為她的控制慾很強。哪怕妳已經出社會，媽媽還是會管妳的穿著、交友圈、職涯規劃；但妳從不把她的話當回事，導致媽媽對妳很失望，妳們總是在爭吵。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyIHouiOXR
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjakXu4kN9w
坦白說，我當時對妳沒太多想法，畢竟我們根本沒說過話。妳都在我起床前出門、睡著後回家，見了面也不知道能聊什麼。這種尷尬的關係維持了三年，一直到高中三年級，我才變成大家所知道的羅笙──那個喜歡妳、喜歡到滲入骨髓的羅笙。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmF277eVdG
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoTlSHMHhDL
先解釋當時的背景吧。我當時的狀況非常差，爸媽不同意我考藝術學院、勸我放棄芭蕾，在學校又因為外表被同學霸凌、被老師性騷擾。那段時間於我而言就像地獄，曾求助卻被反說是自己的問題，光熬過每天的二十四小時都讓我想死，失眠、焦慮、精神不濟等症狀一一出現，身心靈都感到疲憊不堪，覺得自己再也撐不下去。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJxsY3WjxM
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8BzVjgOri
某個爸媽都去上班的早晨、我應該要去學校的時間，我人卻還坐在餐桌，吃著硬掉的早餐。明明知道會遲到，身體卻怎樣都動不起來，連開始新的一天的勇氣都沒有。正當我思考曠課會有什麼下場時，一個腳步聲從樓梯走下來、嚇了我一跳，我以為家裡只有自己。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfpV0kDYD9
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeGf7UMdkw
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3I3ANgn8Ep
「你不用上學嗎？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ94Pa7VhMR1
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOpe9QxwqAX
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3UsLEprGR
是妳，妳竟然在家裡。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡarofN0Ib0m
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPOV7obcmO
「妳不用上班嗎？」我錯愕問。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRasj6fmMl2
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6in8p7me81
「實驗沒進展，老闆乾脆放我假。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGoUy2Hvsoq
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIgug5nJM6B
妳從我旁邊走過、打開冰箱。我以為妳指的是治療疾病的藥物實驗，現在回想，妳那時協助的實驗，應該是水果塔的研發。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKPTGChVXl
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「你不去學校嗎？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5BixoxnxHY
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妳突然問，口氣不是關心，像在亂開話題。但當時的我瀕臨崩潰，竟下意識說了句：「我只想去死。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQKB90QJzJ
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「……？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnybIRbgKA3
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妳把目光從冰箱移到我身上，我這才意識到自己說了什麼。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGDyY2sek5i
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「呃，我的意思是……！」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDV68zPjev
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「想死的話，我不會阻止你喲。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVS1AW8yc0q
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妳關上冰箱的門，盯著我吃到一半的麵包。比起我的性命，妳似乎比較在意早餐要吃什麼，這讓我很受傷。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54S1AReCYP
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「唉，別用那種表情看我，我不是在叫你去死。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLu0jIknGxc
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdmVGLtyu9
看我僵在原地，妳一臉「這小孩真麻煩」的口氣說：「要生要死，你自己決定，怎麼運用生命是你的自由，我不會干涉。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoJnYAi1ya
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「可是……」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7iIOvGlCDn
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「但有個前提：你已經為自己活過一次。如果你的人生跟屍體沒兩樣，死不死根本沒差。從沒活過的人，沒有資格談死。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbMddDzHbby
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrDHynnyFoX
我什麼話也說不出，當時的衝擊很難形容。我的生活只有家和學校，但同一棟房子裡，卻有個人──妳──在用全然不同的思考方式在生活。我封閉的世界彷彿被敲開一個洞，新的顏色灌進來，是妳的顏色。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvlirckntbe
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為什麼妳說得出這種話？603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3Fk6xZ7hE
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBsK21TqoA
為什麼妳的價值觀和大家這麼不同？603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyRyH0HK0D
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQCvMZ7ODb
妳都在想什麼？都經歷了什麼？603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bVG9zU79N
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoI2hdJmYeQ
面具脫下後，這才是妳的真面目。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWgfw5jzX5
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「姊姊。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6eA2Ieh6qS
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我突然問妳：「妳平常是真的加班，還是不想回家？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKddlnJO7bV
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妳沒有回話，只給我一抹迷人的微笑。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxLIMQHhde8
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「好羨慕。」我說：「很多人都說不想長大，但我想趕快變成大人。小孩子沒有獨立生活的能力，大多時候只能任人宰割，我討厭這樣，所以我很羨慕妳。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuVMaZXt9O
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡakcN1uCZbC
妳雖然在笑，卻解讀不出喜怒哀樂，也看不出是否認同我的話。妳應該改名叫「白懸」，因為妳就像一部懸疑小說，令人摸不著頭緒。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0vpKdzVwTf
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「笙。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSmuTv82Ql
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三年來，妳第一次叫我的名字。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd5NhVZHKpS
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「我幫你請假，一起去吃早餐吧。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmeXFAyIxr
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8K393wlYoB
於是，我們一起出門，那是我人生第一次翹課，感覺出乎預料平淡，是妳讓我心跳加速。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gajXdO9y1
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwiYdWV5Z8Y
那天我們一直在一起，吃完早餐去逛街，逛完街去看展，看完展去夜市，一路上沒太多話，畢竟（當時的）我們話都不多，但那氣氛非常舒服，我至今都記得我們早餐吃了什麼、展場入口的收票員、射飛鏢贏來的獎品，尤其便利商店的布丁雪糕，那是我此生唯一從妳手裡接過的禮物。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhgClyI6oj
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603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyyMuMSBepk
「我一點都不值得羨慕喔。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOyA4d6xkXV
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAseVC9v2K9
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLGYJpjK0VV
一直到晚上七點，我們從夜市走去車站的路上，妳才回覆我早上的話。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEf0uyDUFVN
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0QMXaJqnr5
「確實，我擅長與人保持距離，因為我對自由的嚮往超越了任何一份情感。我甚至想追求更多自由，擺脫倫理道德、打破社會框架，當一個徹頭徹尾的瘋子。」妳苦笑，「但我們這類人啊，忠於自由、安於歸宿。嚮往自由並非厭惡束縛，而是對束縛自己的人不滿；一旦出現值得效忠、值得愛的人，被當成寵物也無所謂。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCSC48nSaF
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我當時沒發現妳這段話有多恐怖。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoDQ7p126L
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「我的人生，就是不停地尋找能給我套上項圈的人。假使那個人真的出現，我會變得多瘋狂呢？那份執念又將把我帶去哪呢？我會為了那個人做到什麼地步呢？我整天都在想這些，一點也不高尚，所以我不值得羨慕。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCexbgJHSQh
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSWuXFp92q
妳說這些，並不是想得到我的回應，單純為說而說，因為妳很自私，妳的腦中只有自己，連正在聽自己說話的我也不願意顧慮。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5RLYSgtoZ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwZwPsc0Bi
所以妳永遠不會知道──因為無聊而打的請假電話，拯救了身心靈差點崩潰的我；隨便挑的一間展覽，開啟了我對武士刀的熱愛；衝著第二支半價買的布丁雪糕，從此成了回憶，我一百年後也無法忘記。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxp8VhItG5
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGg8bJcL03h
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1gREqb50g
「抱歉，現在說這些，你也聽不懂吧？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHhWsaLq24
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4t8WeOudiG
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確實，我不敢說全部聽懂。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfTLXiwV6s
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但我知道妳很寂寞。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlyP0mLyCc7
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「竟然跟一個高中生說這些，我也是瘋了。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oLtn1pKQi
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603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9xxzh6gLt
寂寞的妳，兩年後得到能操控距離的水果塔。一夕之間，爸爸媽媽變得不認識妳，親戚朋友叫不出妳的名，高中同學翻開畢業紀念冊，全然想不起妳的事。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnh8A3skQeR
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrZXRCpZ2H
而妳彷彿重獲新生。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAH6BUJHoN
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtSi9I07SgT
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxZolmoxV3
「……！？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfd1uR88Hc
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1iZjktEQT
里奧給我看妳的相片，已經是我大學二年級的事了。我記憶中的妳成熟穩重，但相片中，妳只穿一件寬擺帽T，頭髮全部變成粉紅色，看起來比我小。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ493JMBy2dn
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1iq1A2lv7
「她是你姊姊？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnt4x4DMUAi
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyB6d7d84mP
里奧大我兩屆，是商學院的資優生，講話還不是現在這副死德性。特地來藝術學院找我，是為他的摯友瘋帽而來，目的是打聽妳的事。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ91NQxxlwOa
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNEvMaL4FZ
「五官確實是她……」我盯著相片，「但是，氣質和我記憶中不一樣。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cPSZ0Zw2e
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSSxsXJB3j
「你們很久沒見了？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQfuzMapHH
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDN9yLXZfH9
「嗯，她本來就很少回家，我現在又是外宿。上次見面是兩年前，我高三的時候。」我問：「她發生什麼事了？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oh808sPlS
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWA4oWO4qAR
「情況很複雜。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUSD5Q7pQhI
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhcJVQK6AQA
里奧用他琉璃色的眼睛凝視我。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtDvVAsKHqW
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqNRPA8VWwe
「你姊姊現在，是某人身邊最麻煩的鬣狗。我們換個地方談。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpnd4j6Aktj
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KsuDZa27H
妳想擺脫過往的一切、拉開與所有人的距離，卻沒想過我會主動靠近，所以我很感謝里奧，因為他帶我進入妳的世界──一個荒誕的仙境，成為你們荒誕的一部分。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftMkOReYRJ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvzfGnnJnw
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdvrdBeN54l
「初次見面，我叫紅鶴。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3j2cn4tNQ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnf3WbSXb6X
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1cnXvL0z8
追隨妳的腳步，我也重獲新生。和妳一樣的髮色，和妳同個色系的衣著。我用全新的姿態來到妳面前，妳卻看都不看我一眼。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojG9zZar9i
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGq7wNIHR1K
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNuW4QPHEj
「幸會，我是艾莉絲，可以叫我夏悠。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0Tg9MNYTZ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXhMi0ODFAP
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHYWk8ztSnG
給妳套上項圈的人，除了身體塞滿棉花，我找不出任何特色。她是連表情都沒有的人偶、用來滿足自己母親思念的替代品，我不懂妳為什麼選擇她。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJ6k1x810m
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEByFpCpPo8
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2F6A76UhyC
「我最喜歡小悠了！」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWsX9XIfo3
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjUfe651ki4
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPzktpxqGs
明明比較早認識妳的人，是我。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqujRjiAI7n
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIul0MorIui
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hEPfDUQKp
「我聽妳的！小悠說什麼我都聽！」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVboe3k33j
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwD5mt5nGh
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwhyFg2Jse5
被妳拯救過、最了解妳孤獨的人，是我。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cqeRydP6G
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwdTK0ASXo
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk5Z7eeTeLj
「我只要有小悠就夠了！」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenT4HZTGSm
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCegJkC6gJ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEofrBaLUmZ
最有資格把妳綁在身邊的人，應該也是我。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIQUbUlSvr
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8KT2nQVBGs
我不知道這份執念從何而來，畢竟我和妳沒有太多相處，但我就是好不甘心。我以為我們戴著一樣的面具，後來發現，我們其實活在不同的宇宙；妳的宇宙只有妳，妳孤單一人漂浮在深沉的黑暗，我是唯一前往過那片黑暗的人。我厭煩戴面具的世界，嚮往妳追逐的自由。我想擁抱妳、陪伴妳，我願意和妳一起死在那片黑暗，我願意以弟弟的身分給妳想要的歸宿。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDp7OtoLjR
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfCEsTHOcp5
但那個人──那個被權力腐化的人，非但沒拯救妳，還對妳施加內而外的破壞。她破壞妳的人格、妳的美，妳所有令我著迷的一切。妳是尊貴的獅鷲，卻被連人都稱不上的怪物糟蹋，我怎麼可能嚥得下這口氣？603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxV7s7VWsea
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJKu8j91ZT
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRl70wmQbSx
「我愛她。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1ADCFHBTz
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbaKIcG5kIo
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwDWbyNWTWB
我的偏執讓我變得越加恐怖，我開始殺人──最初我們一起看的展覽、那些武士刀，我揮起來竟毫不費力，習慣「剝奪他人生命」所需要的時間，也短暫得令人難以置信。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKyP5YmGvC
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVhWumvLzk
「我多麼希望自己能擁有她。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Y0jII2B9Y
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFuIpoGYCn
我創造了新的宇宙，那個宇宙充滿妳，但血紅色的鶴會汙染妳，我不能讓妳蒙受更多汙穢，所以向他託付了妳。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQF5Ljih0h
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZXmFVTzuAA
「拜託你了，金允燦。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpBFwC4Q3pd
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa7CkyrMlWB
我親愛的姊夫，一個不屬於仙境，卻影響仙境至深的男人。他是艾莉絲與黨對接的窗口，也是唯一沒有水果塔，卻知道我們所有事情的人。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4QQuPyNXhk
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Fd5Lr5BH0
「可是她……」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3QIgok0VG
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfLDVo4iiUL
「我會幫你找到姊姊。」我說：「能救她的人，真的只剩你了。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5q7lsxPqQ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10bQJwptAT
妳說金允燦是玩具，我一眼就看穿妳的謊言，他在妳心裡的份量與艾莉絲相當。艾莉絲是王、是帝、是絕對的權，她給了妳項圈；金允燦是普通上班族，除了高個子和中分外沒有特色，能給妳的只有沒有特色的生活，但那恰好是妳需要的。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurLynLeZ5B
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAv8cdCeqO
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyMfVw9wYs
“In me the cave-man clasps the seer,”603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPOLWOhEXTz
──於我，穴居者攫取了先知。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECzuv1dJHt
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ox99Er0Zi
“And garlanded Apollo goes”603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5VNJUx3Ui
──佩帶花環的阿波羅，603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXfkQZMDTr
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZoEBrHNhi2
“Chanting to Abraham’s deaf ear.”603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0dxBYhM6D7
──向亞伯拉罕的聾耳吟唱。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdyzUu7xoyP
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPjm15RfgI
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdCJAP3V9v0
姊姊，我親愛的姊姊，妳的人生根本不需要項圈。妳在我眼裡如此耀眼，這樣的妳足以驕傲、足以抬頭。妳必須扯開項圈，妳才是凌駕在艾莉絲之上、那宛若神明的存在。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡndhic1y7MJ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYSPq0a2Ks
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ77wYcS34tA
“In me the tiger sniffs the rose.”603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrRYTf2B2n
──我心有猛虎，細嗅薔薇。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0t47207QdZ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUobLpyYLUQ
“Look in my heart, kind friends, and tremble,”603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6I6GPRwo84
──審視我的心靈吧，朋友，你應戰慄。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWrxw8dlo94
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjPoYAHmjA
“Since there your elements assemble.”603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwCLI8RTKXX
──因為那才是你本來的面目。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCoNrNrvQ2R
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xeHAORUlr
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJQgXFG5w0
重拾勇氣的妳，殺死了他們一半的人；剩下的苟延殘喘，變成今天的高宇維、神與畜。重創艾莉絲體系後，妳和金允燦創立Platinum，妳終於有了自己的家。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KB9eeiglK
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDKuFTxBpN
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpiCKlRwFyo
「你做好覺悟了嗎？」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ2NArUdWZ4
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsnG1pmnno7
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1WkO6irdO
一生都在不幸的妳，和姊夫幸福快樂了一百年，我也不知不覺監視里奧他們如此之久，久到第二代、第三代出現，導致我的名單越來越長，必須殺死的人越來越多。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PW1rVIBrz
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1pJnUYJm5
「注射後，蜘蛛糖會埋沒你的理智，你將只剩『快樂』一種情緒。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6bFTl9xEe
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkUohkHGzr
閉館的體育場，笑臉還是那頭墨綠色的頭髮。她平淡告訴我：「除非你的理智戰勝它、搶回主導權。你將和蜘蛛糖合而為一，得到難以想像的力量。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡty08d6dJOg
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLw9JrAvRgI
「無所謂，這樣就夠了。」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknCg7Dl69N
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZF8VRIlU9L
一百年後的二十二世紀，姊夫已經離開，妳平靜快樂的日子畫下句點。妳的目光再次注視艾莉絲體系，暗中阻止悲劇再次發生，因為妳就是這麼溫柔，和當年幫我請假的妳一樣，妳從來沒有變──603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyrV47aQBuW
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6EMSFlo4NT
可是這樣不行啊，我親愛的姊姊。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCbqLdg9sX
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxvRD1m3Kx
只要水果塔還在，妳就無法置身事外，這樣的妳是沒辦法幸福的。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnEM0sSh6M
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksLJM7pg6Z
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ04fI7roCqg
「嘻嘻嘻……嘻嘻哈哈哈哈！」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGClakKRkuE
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHXnw7Tc9C6
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnebpQQAQFi
所以，一切都交給我吧。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ESKrrKVf1
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpJF9dRCDU
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuL8H8BjRpd
「姊姊……姊姊……哈哈！我會把他們全部殺光，感謝我吧！姊姊！」603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1JT6NvTib
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTTEfhU2KD
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaRapgjGFca
我和我體內的蜘蛛，是為了妳的幸福而生的。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ45l4L87whz
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJECbngWE5
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0u5jql56Lu
一百年前，妳幫鶴找到活下去的希望。603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPU5wTNH0NQ
603Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rlcaUQD7b
如今，是鶴報恩的時候了。