以下是我看到某參賽作品以後，所寫的留言轉正文，供大家參考。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5P5aZZfTKd
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjWXKA8QMB
感謝參與～27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe42ZyrLFjR
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7dmNpyxCo
老實說，這篇給我的感覺不是十行詩，是散文十行。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNZKKjYWjL
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt95kSN1875
雖然文章有哲理，但是詩度很低。詩的要素，如節奏、意象、音樂、譬喻都很平淡，甚至欠奉；內容太趨近說明，解釋過多，太黏了。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoe30PXUW0
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09dBogSUmV
～～～～分隔線～～～～27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiOECVlExyg
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQAlJJ652P
我回頭看我自己寫的詩，有些也算不上是詩，例如27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3rZvI9ijCC
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLzT3W7c77z
〈限制和自由〉27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNQKLNJMOX6
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Ba2LEyK9n
penana.com/article/102489527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5lDAjal9Y
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8WmGy0CdL
現在看來，我覺得它不是詩 (但為記錄故，還是收進詩集)。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmqm8rhjuj
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YVUr8xr39
詩度 0。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kE2yhBdof
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHVrv2jS5m
～～～～分隔線～～～～27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSMDHJUjK2
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxekVr3G1d
〈問〉27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSXRcWF4Ti
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOr0VDVFNI
penana.com/article/102494427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV4GpOVzQm
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAFxYuEn5qO
詩度高一點。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7P9oKOKAy0
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLD6JsB9ZfX
～～～～分隔線～～～～27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY31daGuCjf
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUR9L9ZSjp6
〈摩天之輪〉27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ttANPpQNO
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSkIYrFT2tQ
penana.com/article/104570527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5GKrDUt9Yv
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTbDVr68b5
詩度再高一點。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGoVFzi1nF
～～～～分隔線～～～～
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRNlFOCHxr
〈暗流〉27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xZcN6VVJ3
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeR70ECZxKc
penana.com/article/160383827Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPD4CWfMEFt
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARQDsRRzRa
詩度比前三首都高。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5DN831FqY
～～～～分隔線～～～～
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡso0QbR2Was
我最近在看台灣詩人蕭蕭的詩論，詩人有句話簡單卻有道理：「詩，是『換句話說』，『再換句話說』」。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkV9ZChNJ8F
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbBpfMi8rA
我在筆記本上面，寫下自己的句子：「詩，是常句和變句的雙人舞。」27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBInolmuAW
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDsJEreuqMl
跟你分享。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9cUXihWBBC
～～～～分隔線～～～～
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6whL3uOXBC
此外，這篇連結文章也可作參考。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGs3cQVppjt
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjZB3k0jGw
【認識新詩的基本元素】27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKBytg9oqhf
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqnVKYS9G75
blog.udn.com/shesiya/11359719327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpC0eK9ndUj
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9S7QUq9Wd
我之後應該會就我最近對新詩的思考＆自己詩作/非詩作的例子，寫一篇文章放在我的《寫詩這件事及其他》裡面。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVn4alYB0yE
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNcGQjWOotB
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkOPL6ALG4
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLxIElGsyT
【我後來回答參賽者「希望較符合你的標準」的留言】
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTIK1XCA5F2
這不是我的標準啦，算是台灣詩人對新詩的定義。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7XH5DUkpQ
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNgUSFB0ks
第二版「詩度」有提升，因為用了複沓/排比結構，綿延的音樂性增加了。27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxcU5WzaMiW
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39GqyWTuTK
寫詩要多看詩，也不用急，我檢視自己這兩年多密集寫詩的成果，發現好多不熟的，甚至是皮球假裝成果子的，哈哈～
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1Dhk96OjZ
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZhRdz2yWE0
【這次全新寫的感想】
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVlBHfYt9E6
我拿自己青澀的詩果，甚至非詩的皮球作例子，無非是希望讀者能做個比較，認識一下不同詩度的詩，長什麼樣子；這裡再拿我寫的〈詠栗〉作例子：
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe3rIB7eRB8
〈詠栗〉
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwGA2e5ijZ
殼斗，第一層愛
張牙舞爪威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
豐美的內在
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAiB2OXRKJi
剝去愛，尚有
木訥果皮和刻苦種皮
無口而全然
環抱整個子代
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdC6u4CLziP
充盈在手中打開
當秋天到來
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjEDcm2TBF
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cXapgcRzD
如果寫成
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQzaVMnQfUr
〈詠栗〉
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfEJZ9foa3
殼斗，第一層皮
長滿尖刺威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
內在的果實
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYcfJvfqSS
剝去殼，尚有
木質果皮和苦味種皮
沒有裂口而且完全
包覆整個子葉
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKltpX0cPl9
栗子在手中打開
當秋天到來
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuFBBjClMv7
詩度就不見啦，成為一篇分行的散文，而且是說明文。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWDrupFxLSj
會寫詩的讀者，可將自己詩裡的詩句 (＝變句)，換成一般常用的句子 (＝常句) 玩玩看；而苦惱於抓不到詩度的讀者，反其道而行，將自己作品的句子，改動幾個詞彙，以「一般不會這樣用」的語詞 (也可改變詞性) 代替，或可抓到一點詩的感覺。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBHOIczsvh3
當然，現代詩的面向不僅在於詞彙，但這是一個開始。
27Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlRPev9cQhn
祝各位被詩淋透，不，淋得半濕就好。
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