我訓左係床上面,腦海仲記得頭先阿琪既說話,以及阿琪既表情。263Please respect copyright.PENANApMC1xN16Ob
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我地係公園度,傾左好多野,今晚,令到我更加明白阿琪,我記我阿琪一開始講佢既野果陣,係用一個好平靜既語氣。263Please respect copyright.PENANAlcCnqK8fKE
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「阿牛,我平時已經講左好多我既野你知,你覺得,我係個點既人?」佢係用一個問題而開始。263Please respect copyright.PENANAWyxU7wBMbt
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而佢咁樣一問,我諗左諗後好認真咁答佢:「妳係一個好值得人地照顧既女仔。」263Please respect copyright.PENANAkhDruQvaFm
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「真係咁?」阿琪反問返我,「點解我係一個值得照顧既人?」263Please respect copyright.PENANA0hGaChFQc1
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「因為……」唔知點解咁樣比佢問既,口窒窒添。263Please respect copyright.PENANA9aFyqUX3HS
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佢無等我答佢,就講:「以前,有好多個男仔都話會照顧我,但係佢地到最後,都係最傷害我既人,我份人好易信人,每次遇到一個真心對我既人,我都會提醒自己,叫自己睇清楚先,不過每當我決定去選擇信一個人既時候,都會比我發現果個人原來背後呃緊我。」263Please respect copyright.PENANAASuaO97X4b
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佢依然用好平淡既語氣同我講:「我上一次選擇信既人,令到我要變賣好多野還債,而家一要打官司,我屋企要我養,我無助既時候,係有好多人幫我,但係果D人個個都係想我做佢女朋友,我唔接受的話,我就養唔到家,我接受既話,又對唔住果D幫我既人,所以我只可以靠自己,迫不得已既時候先搵果D人幫我,不過我好明白一件事,佢地幫我幾多,我始終有一日係要還。」263Please respect copyright.PENANAsRF6kmPJ74
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聽到佢咁講後,我先知道原來阿琪背後仲有呢D野要煩,「咁……我有咩可以幫到妳架?」我問佢,而佢望住我同我講:「你知唔知道,我最想既唔係你幫我。」263Please respect copyright.PENANALqY9Q0W1v1
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「點解呢?」我又問。263Please respect copyright.PENANAF6Ya6nUDYv
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「我唔想你都變成果D人咁啊,我唔想最後係要為左報答你既幫忙先同你一齊啊。」阿琪好認真咁同我講:「我想我係真心去愛一個人先同佢一齊,而唔係佢願意花幾多錢係我身上,又或者幫左我幾多,我先同果個人一齊,你知唔知道咁樣既愛,係會有幾大既壓力……」阿琪講講下喊左出黎,而我見到佢咁,就行上前攬住左佢。263Please respect copyright.PENANAfQdJ6W7QbS
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「我好辛苦啊……究竟D煩事幾時先會完,我幾時先可以安安定定咁過生活啊……」阿琪,佢係打從心底咁喊出黎。263Please respect copyright.PENANAGYcqjU4MkS
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我無出過聲,因為我知道阿琪而家需要既,唔係花言巧語,亦唔係一個承諾,而係一個可以安靜係佢身邊陪住佢既人。263Please respect copyright.PENANAHRgcHk7iQM
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佢繼續喊,亦都繼續講,「所以我唔想係呢個時候拍拖,我有好多野煩,我唔想害到其他人,更加唔想害到你,你知唔知啊……」263Please respect copyright.PENANARfnWk34TmQ
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我望住淚眼梨花既阿琪,講出我心底既話:「我無諗過妳會害我,亦都無迫妳同我係埋一齊,妳要我等,我可以等,雖然我唔知我可以等幾耐,但我知道我可以係呢段時間陪住妳,所以,妳可以決定自己一個人去面對問題,可以選擇去搵其他人去幫妳,但希望妳會選擇如果要喊既話,只搵我一個人,因為我一定有方法令到妳笑返。」263Please respect copyright.PENANASuPsPptlDn
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「真係?」阿琪問我。263Please respect copyright.PENANAIiRR86hmlt
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「嗯。」我點一點頭:「我有幾時呃過妳,我只希望,妳選擇我陪妳渡過人生中其中一次既低潮,咁樣已經好足夠。」263Please respect copyright.PENANA3fGxyLuUsR
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阿琪點一點頭,然後我,打左佢一下,佢不解地望住我,然後我話:「妳生日喊,所以抵打。」263Please respect copyright.PENANAPHZkolUPBw
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「但人地生人,你竟然打人。」阿琪笑左笑話。263Please respect copyright.PENANA9ZfMzKnC5g
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「妳有樣野唔記得做。」我同佢講,而佢又用一個不解既眼神望住我,「妳唔記得許願。」263Please respect copyright.PENANA1lPF6f9KQ5
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「年年我都有許願,但係次次都無實現到。」阿琪扁咀咁講。263Please respect copyright.PENANAqUij35dhC4
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「今年唔同,妳許既願一定會實現。」我話。263Please respect copyright.PENANAnHQJXYO74p
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「點解你會咁肯定?」阿琪問。263Please respect copyright.PENANA1HSHrB3JSf
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「因為……有我。」我講完後,就捉緊阿琪既雙手,「乖,許願。」263Please respect copyright.PENANA9vz5QrvsTM
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「嗯。」阿琪點左下頭後,閉上眼許左個願,而我,就錫左阿琪既額頭一下,輕聲說:「我收到妳既願望。」263Please respect copyright.PENANALJwq7BJYnS
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係床上面,我仍然記我阿琪所講既野,原來係阿琪歡笑既背後,有咁多野要處理,佢所經歷過既事,比我呢個年紀要去經歷既仲要多。263Please respect copyright.PENANA5Shn7Fbfps
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如果,可以幫輕到佢就好,但係,我邊有咁既能力去幫佢。263Please respect copyright.PENANArBmQhrp1Q1
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我能做到既,就好似我所講既一樣,只可以係佢身邊默默咁陪住佢,做一個情緒既垃圾桶,呢個,係我最可以做到既野。263Please respect copyright.PENANAfsrvKMQIuw
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但係咁做,真係值得咩?我唔敢諗,因為,我怕我會有放棄既念頭。263Please respect copyright.PENANAKfqLAYTNNd