Once upon a never there was a princess. This princess loved playing with a golden ball. It couldn’t be a red ball, it couldn’t be a blue ball, it had to be gold as gold=rich. Despite being a teenage princess, she still played with this silly little ball as it’s not like she had anything better to do, they don’t have internet in fairy tale land, you know? Anyway, one day she was playing with her ball, until BAM it fell in a well.
“Oh no!” cried the princess. “My ball is gone!” So she sat down and wept like losing this ball was the equivalent of losing a family member.
“May I help you?” Suddenly, a frog came out. The princess was so distressed she didn’t bother questioning what a talking frog was doing.
“Oh, little froggie, my ball has fallen down in the well. May you please get it for me? I will give you anything I have. Jewels, money, a nice women frog, anything as long as you get that ball!”
“I don’t want those things. Let me sit at your dining table, have supper with you, and sleep in your bed!”
“How can a frog sit at a dining table and eat?” thought the princess. However, she really wanted that ball so she said yes. The frog hopped down, grabbed the ball, and gave it to the princess. The princess squealed like a fangirl with joy, grabbed the ball, and ran off home. Slowly, the frog hopped behind her.
THE NEXT DAY
The princess was sitting down to eat supper on her golden plate, never mind that a golden plate is an extreme waste of money, when suddenly, she heard a knock on the door. THe princess went and opened it as all the servants suck at this castle, and saw the frog. She jumped.
“You’re a frog! How can you knock on the door?”
“Through the power of love!” shouted the frog.
“GO AWAY YOU IDIOT REPTILE!
“Amphibian!” shouted the frog as the princess slammed the door.
The King asked the princess what in the name of hell was going on. “What in the name of hell is going on, nameless daughter?”
“This gross frog saved my golden ball and now it’s stalking me because I told him I would let him eat and sleep with me.”
“My ungrateful daughter! You must keep your promises!”
“Oh, alright.” She sighed and opened the door. The frog hopped in and hopped up on a chair, because this frog can really hop high. “Now put me up by you!” he croaked.
“Why can’t you just hop on the table like you did with the chair?”
“Nameless daughter, do what he says or I’ll take away your ball.”
“Oh, all right.” She grabbed the frog and put him by her. He then began to eat off of her plate, as apparently none of the servants thought about giving him his own plate. Useless servants.
Then it was time to sleep, as there was nothing to do after supper apparently. “Now it’s time to sleep together!” croaked the frog.
The princess moaned. She didn’t want to share a bed with a stupid slimy frog. “Nameless daughter, do what he says or no breakfast!”
Thus the princess had no choice but to carry him to her bed. She threw the frog on the bed and laid down. But suddenly, the frog changed. He turned into a naked man! (What, did you expect clothes to just appear out of thin air?) The frog was a man all along!
“Oh, frog, you look so beautiful now,” said the princess in a seductive voice. “I will happily share my bed with you anytime.” said the princess.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKSrhdNW8H
“I was turned into a frog by a witch and the only way I could get out was if someone showed me an act of kindness. In the years I’ve been stuck in this form, I swore to myself I would wed the person who turned me back into a human.”707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ70PW2TrrTJ
“I’ve showed you kindness! I let you eat and sleep with me! Yay! Let’s marry and have 12 kids!”
The man laughed. “Really? When did you show me kindness? You moaned and groaned throughout it all! If it wasn’t for the king, you wouldn’t have done it at all! Yes, the king was nice and understanding!”
“Wait…” said the princess. “Does that mean?”
“Yes!” said the man. “I SHALL MARRY THE KING!”
Suddenly, the king burst in through the door. “LET’S DANCE BROTHER!” he shouted and him and the frog turned into a man tangoed throughout the night. The princess was so stunned by these happenings she turned to stone and never moved again.
And they all lived crazily ever after. THE END.
A Note From Your Author: The original copy of the fairy tale had some crap about how the king planned the princess to drop her ball into the well and the frog would find it and then they would get married, but that made no sense. I like this ending much better. Seriously, the princess is a bitch during this story. I would never marry her.
Whenever I write stories with a lot of dialogue, I always feel like I do the quotation marks wrong for some reason. Please inform me if you ever spot any grammatical or spelling mistakes in my work, and the amazing Fujaku will fix it right away. Sincerly, Fujaku.
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