"Vielen dank, mein Herr und Gott segnet Sie." (Thank you and God bless you, sir.) Called out a young girl to an elderly man. Who passed by the singers singing carols, leaving a small worth of change behind in their small metal cup. The young girl did not sing along the others singers but jingled gleefully to the rhythm with the bell she held in her small hand while keeping an eye at the cup before her feet that very slowly fills with coins during the day from passer-bys.
I sighed and looked up to the clouded sky. Snowflakes dancing by and few rested upon my face which melted away. I scoff at the name since I surpassed death; Christmas. All that being merry and jolly with gifts, feasts and singing those songs of joy and warmth during the dark times of the year. Not my cup of tea for a long time.
What does leave me puzzled is during that dark and cold time many people open their shut up hearts and feel more likely generous than during the other time of the year. Not to mention I once celebrated Christmas too with joy and love and remained then generous even beyond the holidays. Although I was a poor and hard working farmer; once.
Quickly I tugged my scarf tighter and looked down on the street again. I am standing right beside the tall Cologne Dome while looking down the street where the singers are at the other end. Many people walk by into different and various shops to find the right present while others head home from their long day of work.
"Guten Abend Herr Menard. Keeping an eye open for a case, I see?" Asked Bishop Matthew who takes his short walk round the city before retiring every evening, no matter what weather.
"Indeed Bishop Matthew. Always ready to offer a helping hand to those in need." I tipped my hat to greet him.
"Like a true Christian. God smiles on you, Gregor." He smiled at me.
Not from where I am standing. Me a vampire, a creature of murder and nightmare and secondly I doubt God's existence. "Maybe."
"Why the doubt, my son? Tell me, do you have any plans on Christmas?"
"Plans on Christmas?" I paused to think. "No, Bishop. I don't celebrate Christmas at large like many others do."
"Would you be interested in attending the morning mass on Christmas?"
"Me? In church?" I chuckled to the thought. "Thank you but no."
"Very well, it's up to you. The invitation is always open." He smiled warmly and gave a friendly pat on my shoulder before leaving me alone. Slowly I walked down the street to head back to my office.
Christmas. Not my holiday. I have nothing against the season, just the holiday. Not only does appear odd, a vampire celebrating Christmas but since I have become one I see the world different. Holidays are like people's birthdays. Nothing more. Plus I saw more horrid things than one can imagine or dare to dream. Monsters in different forms. I have become from a dreamer like all the other humans to a realist.
Although I try to forget the past, on Christmas it is always revived without a choice. Seeing my beloved getting excited until the day came to share gifts and to kiss under the mistletoe. They are lovely memories but after her death they hurt like needles to my unbeating heart. At the same time I have this longing to see her again yet I would be ashamed to step up to her, fore I am not the man she once knew and loved.
She knew me as Gregor Wiesener the farmer outside of Cologne. Now I am Gregor Menard a consulting detective and in secret a vampire here in Cologne.
All in all Christmas too jolly and dreamy in my opinion.
"Any spare change for the hungry and poor, sir?" Asked the girl that I have noticed from the beginning. Her smile was warming. Slowly I fished out few coins and threw them into the cup. "Thank you, sir!" She thanked.
Even being close around children makes the pain more unbearable. I remember too well how my beloved wanted to have children, especially a daughter. I have tried to forget by traveling around the world but in every corner my mind always found a memory to burden me.
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