Chaos reigned as the two EMTs who had arrived did their best to rush Benjamin to the ambulance. All the while, Trevor followed behind them like a zombie, unsure of what to do or how to feel.
It was true that he was panicking at the moment, and he wanted nothing more than to be right beside his father. But he also knew that getting in their way could potentially lead to him losing his father─forever. He followed them silently as they carried his father on a stretcher out of the house, making sure he locked the door before he got into the ambulance with them and they drove to the hospital.
As the sound of the sirens filled his ears, he found it hard to focus on his father who lay before him. He felt tears welling around his eyes as thoughts of losing him filled his mind. If he lost his father, he'd be all alone.
"Please make it out alive," he whispered, grabbing onto his father's limp hand.
The ride to the hospital felt longer than it actually was, as he desperately prayed for his father to survive. He didn't know how he'd survive without him.
Once they arrived at the hospital, he watched silently as his father was rushed to the building. Tears had begun to surround his eyes, blurring his vision as he exited the ambulance and walked in the direction which his father had been taken.
He continued to follow them as they rushed him to the emergency department but he was stopped by a doctor before they got there. Like a zombie, he slowly turned to face the doctor without showing any emotion on his face, the only thing visible being his tears.
"You can't go in there son," the doctor told him.
"Why not?" he faintly heard himself ask. The doctor looked from Trevor to the direction of the emergency department, contemplating on what to tell the sixteen year old. He had seen his share of patients who went to emergency and never made it out. And because of this, he was at a loss of words even though he didn't quite know what was wrong.
Sensing that something could indeed go wrong, Trevor forced himself to ask a question which he feared the answer to:
"Is my dad going to die?"
The doctor finally returned his gaze to him and offered a small smile, neither sympathetic nor full of pity. Rather, it was just a smile─a plain smile.
But this didn't satisfy Trevor. He walked closer to the doctor and repeated his question,
"Is my dad going to die?"
* * *
-Present-
Trevor quietly drove towards the hospital after dropping off Charles who was beyond drunk. Fighting off his friend who claimed to be sober enough to have more drinks had not been easy. But once he had gotten him safely into his apartment, he couldn't help but to think of his father, and wonder how he was doing.
He pulled into the parking lot with ease and locked the car before walking towards the building. He found himself recounting the day which his father had been admitted after his third heart attack and felt truly grateful towards the doctors and nurses who had helped to keep him alive.
The sound of the elevator ringing upon reaching the third floor pulled him out of his thoughts. He walked out and began the short journey to his father's room, making sure to greet the nurses at the nursing station and those floating around the ward.
Once he reached his father's room, he gently opened the door and entered, immediately surrounded by darkness. He took several steps towards his father, where a dim lamp had been left on, and looked at him as he lay on his bed, peacefully sleeping. Smiling slightly, he allowed his eyes to wander towards the machines which monitored his condition. When he felt a hand on his, he quickly turned his head to face his father, watching as he moved around slightly.
"You're here," Benjamin said, smiling at his son.
Trevor nodded his head before reaching for the chair in the room and pulling it closer to the bed to sit down.580Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLDWL08U4s
"How are you feeling? Any pain?" Trevor immediately asked. His father chuckled.
"Don't start acting like my doctor now, you're my son." Trevor smiled at those words and nodded in understanding.
"Okay."
There was a short moment of silence as the two men tried to think of what to talk about but the silence was broken when his father spoke.
"I thought of your mother today."
Immediately, his face darkened and he turned his head away from his father.
"Trev─"
"Why do you even bother thinking about her? It's been fifteen years since she left us and we haven't heard from her since. What more is thinking about her going to do? It's not like it'll bring her back."
Benjamin felt guilt begin to cloud his heart as he heard his son's words.
She didn't leave us, he wanted to tell him, I was the one who let her go.
However, after years of constantly lying to his son, he knew that it was too late to start telling the truth. He reached out to Trevor and caused him to turn his head.
"It's been fifteen years Trevor. Do you know how hard it is to go through the day without thinking about her? Without wondering how she's doing─who she's with?"
"Look at what she did to you. You can't leave the hospital dad, she ruined our lives!"
His father looked at him, speechless. When he started to tell Trevor that his mother had left them out of anger whenever he got drunk, he never thought that he would cause such resentment to grow in his son's heart towards his mother. He continued to look at him as tears began to surround his eyes.
Trevor immediately noticed and placed his hand on his father's out of concern.
"Is something wrong? Are you alright?" he asked his father. But Benjamin shook his head.
"I'm sorry, son. I'm so sorry," was all he could say before the tears finally fell.
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