It finally happened. As I clicked the "send" button on my email tab, I relished the moment. All that was inside me were butterflies. It had taken quite a few persuasive conversations, but despite all odds, I had somehow convinced my parents to buy a puppy. I held the blue collar with "Daisy" on the tag tightly in my hand.771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5NXig05E3
We all hopped inside the car and drove to the owners house to buy what will forever be the cutest possible creature to ever breathe on this planet. Daisy. She was a six-week-old Brittany Spaniel with ginger spots and the brightest blue eyes. She was the noisiest of the bunch, but definitely the sweetest. I picked her up, held her close, and anxiously grabbed the paperwork and food that came with her.
The ride back was tough. She whined. And barked. And cried. We had a crate for her in the back of the car and she didn't seem to enjoy it all that much. My parents continuously reminded me that this was normal. If anything, they seemed to find the entire situation amusing. I didn't. I tried desperately to calm her, to tell Daisy that she shouldn't be nervous. I felt terrible. Eventually she fell asleep and I decided to stare out the window, my chest growing surprisingly tight with nerves. Had I made a mistake?
By the time we pulled into our driveway, Daisy had waken up and started to bark again, I turned to her and gave a tired smile, reminding myself of my parents' reassurance. This was normal. I pulled her crate towards me, unlocking the door and letting her excitedly bound up to me.
"She likes you," my Dad observed as he helped my mom pull the crate out of the car.
"She's a puppy, she likes anyone who gives her attention," I laugh and point out, stroking Daisy's soft, floppy ears.
He shrugged, "I used to raise Brittany puppies, you know. She's grown attached to you already, I can tell."
I'm not sure if he said that out of honesty or in an attempt to comfort me. Maybe both. I'm sure he could feel my stress.
Now here was the real test. Daisy was going to meet her temporary roommate. Nikki. I say temporary hesitantly. Nikki was our sixteen-year-old family terrier who we were planning on putting down soon. She had congestive heart failure--and her heart was almost twice the size it should've been yet she was still a grouch. It was somewhat sad to say, but Daisy, in all honesty, was a replacement of sorts. Nikki was gonna be put down soon and we still wanted a dog.771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ3L024ydrz
Nikki was not nice. I had to constantly make sure they were separated. It sucked, really. Although we all knew Nikki was gonna be put down soon, we didn't want to do it when she was grouchy and hating her home due to a new addition. We didn't want her to feel replaced. I felt absolutely terrible. 771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3L0eidYL4K
Soon it was late into the evening. My parents told me everything would be alright and that I should get some rest. I brought Daisy into my room where we had put her crate so she could sleep with me. I plopped her inside where she groggily watched me close the crate door. The minute it closed she started whining and barking and crying at me. I tried to get her to quiet down, but nothing seemed to work. Tired and worn-out, I tried to ignore her and put some earplugs in. She quieted down after a few minutes and I fell asleep.
Days passed and I continued to stress over this puppy. I'd watch our old dog get flustered and nip at Daisy before I'd shove them apart and get Nikki to calm down. My mother was worried that Daisy would become fearful of other dogs due to the old grouch we called "Nikki." Suddenly, this supposed-to-be-perfect gift quickly turned into a nightmare.
Christmas Day finally came. It was the first Christmas without my brother who was off across the world celebrating with friends, and the first Christmas without my Pops (my mother's father) who had died from cancer a few months prior. At first, I didn't think much of it. Why would Christmas be any different than any of the other days without them? But it was.
Daisy didn't help, either. She was cute, adorable, surprisingly obedient, and almost potty-traied within five days. She was perfection. But she didn't help. As those days passed before Christmas, she had become everything that was wrong with my world. She made Nikki grouchy, she made me lose sleep at night, and she made me feel terribly, terribly lonely. Right? Why else would I feel like this?771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGa1pgRvCPk
After opening presents, I came to the cold realization that I did not love this perfectly sweet puppy. It brought tears to my face as I looked to my parents in completely surrender.
"I can't love her," I said quietly to them as she played with wrapping paper. It would get stuck to on her head and she'd jump to try and bite it. Truly the purest thing to ever live.
My parents looked at me thoughtfully. "We know," my mom finally said softly. "What do you want to do?" she asked.
I struggled to say it. I wanted it, but I didn't want to say it. "I..." I took a deep breath, "I think I want to give her back," I say. My throat felt so tight.
"...Okay," my dad finally replied. That night, after a sad phone call, we drove Daisy back to her original owner. My mom tearily said goodbye while my dad tried not to speak. I've rarely seen my dad close to tears. This was one of those moments. I couldn't watch. I glanced back for a moment as the woman brought Daisy into her house, waving her hand and saying, "Merry Christmas."
Yeah. "Merry Christmas," I mumbled.
When we got home, I quickly found that Daisy was not the source of my problems. The tightening in my chest only got worse, so bad I could barely breath and anxiety seemed to follow my every step. I laid down in my bed, looking at the empty crate under my desk in my room and cried. 771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgIHQHEfGsI
I could hear Nikki's footsteps clicking down the hall as she clumsily poked her head into my room. She somehow always knew when I cried--no matter how quiet I was. She walked up to my bed, unable to jump up like she used to, and laid down on the floor. 771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFfYVbiFqZ
"Why'd you have to be so mean, huh?" I asked her in a whisper while I petted her head. She twitched her ear in response.
"Why'd I have to be so stupid, too..." I said solemnly, eyeing the blue color that sat on my desk. The word, "Daisy" sparkled from the metal tag.
Merry Christmas! Tis the season of spectacular transitions and ever-changing traditions. In all honesty, I love Christmas, but I'm always reminded of this experience from a few years ago and it'll tug at my heartstrings. Figured I'd share it for the contest! Also, I'll confess that it's over 1,000 words (1190 or something w/o this note at the bottom.) I really tried to slim it down but couldn't... sorry.771Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt6be8oPfNw
-LovelySheree
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