"Um," Lotus awkwardly began.
She was sitting beside Donald Na, fingers tapping her knees as she gazed away from him. They had moved to another spot. Sitting in the middle of the walkway was inconsiderate to anyone who just wanted to walk past and she didn't need to watch the caterpillar anymore.
They had been in silence up until now. He didn't mind it, but she did. It felt as if she needed to talk. Otherwise, she would probably stay awake late at night cringing to herself because she was once again her nervous self that made everything unpleasant.
"I don't mean this in a rude way, but why are you still here?" She asked, taking a speedy glance at him.
He gave a buzz of thought before answering, "I have nothing to do."
She rose a brow and repeated, "Then... Why are you still here?"
Maybe that came out unsavoury, but she truly didn't mean it that way. She was curious. If he was bored, surely he would try to cure it.
"You're better than nothing." He stated.
A sullen frown appeared on her lips. That wasn't the answer she guessed he would give. She didn't know why she sulked, but Donald found it amusing as he gave a short haughty laugh.
With a slumped posture, Lotus checked her phone. There were still no notifications of a text. It was beginning to get dark out as well. The clouds had turned the alluring colours she originally wanted to see and were slowly changing into purples with the sky.
Chance was taking his dandy time. He knew that she was terrified of staying out when it was dark. The horror stories she was always told popped up in her brain each time she stayed out late. If she were to be out at night, she only felt safe with someone there that she knew could protect her.
"Waiting for someone?" Donald asked, catching her expecting gaze glued to the phone.
A feeble sound left her at his question. Waiting for someone? More like being tortured by her own blood because he seemed to hate her guts.
"No, I'm just...waiting for my brother to text me." Her voice held a small crack which she internally cringed at.
She squinted her eyes as she could feel the boy beside her trying not to laugh. He wasn't making her feel better. He was just succeeding in making her like a joke.
Lotus childishly huffed, clenching her skirt. They went back into tranquillity. She looked up at the sky, letting it comfort her from her humiliation.
The sun that was now just below the horizon gave the void its last bits of shine. Everything was now dimmer, prompting the streetlights to turn on. That was the first sign she should be back home if it wasn't for—
The gruff laugh of her brother echoed in the distance causing her to freeze and her mind to try to convince her that it wasn't him. A few more voices mingled with his, forming a full conversation that barely reached her ears.
She leaned forwards and looked down both sides of the street. Her breathing hitched as she saw a few familiar faces in the distance. Chance, Kenny, and his other friend with two more people whom she didn't know. The streetlights cast harsh shadows on them, causing them to look more like thugs than regular —albeit badly-behaved— high schoolers.
'Why are they in this part?' She panicked and jump from off the retaining wall.
She looked around, visibly shaken. Her mind didn't take notice of Donald's beguiled simper. He looked down the direction she was looking before she started acting as if she were trapped and let out a sound of contemplation.
"You're antsy," He commented, pulling her out of her blind trepidation.
Her eyes lit up as she inched towards him, hands clasped. "Can I please hide behind you?" She begged, glancing at the incoming group.
"Whatever for?"
His sarcasm wasn't missed, Lotus just decided not to take note of it.
"My brother," She gestured to Chance who was distracted by tossing his soccer ball up and down as he talked to his friends, "is coming. He doesn't want to see me until he says so and I really need to not let him see me! Please!"
She knew it was a lost cause pleading with this boy. He looked as if he was willing to throw her to the lions. And as Chance got closer, her heart quickened.
Her body was shaking as tears bubbled in her eyes. She was terrified of what would happen if she opposed Chance's words. If anything, she'd rather him hit her than ruin what was left of her dull life.
Donald stood up, allowing her room to stand beside him. Despite it being a surprise to her that he was indeed allowing her to hide from the older boy, she didn't waste time aweing about it. She scrambled behind him, almost clenching the back of his jacket to make sure he stayed put.
"Look at you, you're so scared of your own brother," He mocked as he felt her grasp on his back.
"He-He's so cruel!" She sniffled, "Why wouldn't I be scared?"
"You might as well fear all of the world," He sighed.
A whimper was all he got as the group was just steps away. She squeezed her eyes shut, hoping this would work. Donald Na moved slightly as the group was directly in front of them causing her to feel as if all organs in her body stopped working.
Her eyes opened, staring at his back. He didn't unveil her as she suspected. He had just slightly turned as high schoolers passed by.
"They're gone?" She murmured after a minute, peeking at the boys who were walking away without suspecting a thing.
"Yes," He said.
With a sigh of relief, she went to sit back down. "Thank you so much!" She exclaimed.
"He doesn't seem so scary," Donald commented, observing their backs.
Lotus sighed through her nose, her arms crossed and almost hugging herself. Like Chance told Kenny about her being annoying, no one who didn't personally know him didn't know the extent of his iniquity. Sure there were a few fellow kids who had to face his brutal behaviour as a bully, but they didn't know he didn't spare her of it. Nor did they know their parents saw him as someone no one could help— As someone who was bound for failure and there was no saving him from it.
"Yeah, sure, he doesn't seem so scary," She pitifully scoffed.
He deeply exhaled, "As much as I would like to stay and see you mope, I have to go."
She didn't mind it until he leaned towards her and bent down a little, reminding her of the store incident.
'Why does he keep doing that?' She thought, pursing her lip, 'He looks like he's talking to me like a little kid.'
"I need your phone for a second," He commented, holding his hand out.
Lotus cautiously handed him the unlocked device and watched as he did something. It didn't take long for him to hand it back.
"Huh?" She mumbled as she looked down at the number he put in his contacts. She looked back up at the boy with scepticism.
All the hubristic boy did was pat her head before walking off, offering no parting this time.
She fixated on his retreating body, her lips slightly parted. Once he was far away, she looked back down at the screen of her phone which displayed his number.
'What... Just happened?' She asked herself.
Her shock had worn off quickly, leaving her in a state of fear for what seemed like the hundredth time. She was alone, at night, away from her home. She whined and pulled her knees to her chest, eyes darting around.
She could call Haneul, but she didn't want to disturb her just yet. She couldn't call Chance, because of very clear reasons. She couldn't call her brothers nor her parents because Chance would find out in some way, and she couldn't just call Donald Na because she didn't want him to tease her. Not just that, but she didn't know him well enough to just call him for solace.
So she sat curled up, waiting for her dear brother to inform her she could come home. When her phone did ding with a text message from Chance telling her to "get her ass home", she ran back.
Her chest was aching by the time she entered the door, reminding her that she should get more fit. Since she was such a scaredy cat, it would be better if she was able to run without a problem because she always decided to flight in her fight-or-flight mode.
"Where were you?" Her father asked once she got done taking off her shoes.
"Chance told me—" She abruptly stopped when she saw Chance's pointed glare from behind her father.
He mouthed for her to shut up. She almost let out a whimper, only allowing her discomfort to show.
"—I just decided to go outside today." She answered.
"You almost missed dinner," Her father sighed, "And remember not to stay out so late next time. You could get hurt."
"Alright," She murmured and walked past Chance, stiffening as she got closer.
He did nothing as she passed, not even giving her any more attention than that glare. As soon as she walked into the kitchen with their dad, Chance let out a huff through his nose and followed.
There was no way he was going to let her snitch, even if he knew she was too spineless to do something like that anymore. He had to make sure of it, so he'd monitor her while their dad was nearby. He was easier to talk to than their mom who had the more dominant energy in the household so Lotus would usually go run to him for comfort.
Lotus took note of his lingering and hurriedly ate the food their father had graciously made. He didn't speak to her which was good on her part. She didn't want to face his rude words.
She almost threw the dishes she used in the sink and ran from the kitchen and to her room.
The soft tones of her small haven gave her the consolation she desperately needed in the house that Chance had to reside in with her. After a few deep breathes, she sat on her desk chair and fished her phone from her bag. The screen lit up to reveal Donald Na's number that he had typed in. A small smile appeared on her face.
'Maybe he's not as bad as I thought.' She told herself.
She frowned as her thoughts continued, 'But he fought those boys. Who knows who else he's fighting. Is he like Chance? He can't be... Then again...'
"Ugh." She groaned before throwing her head back.
Growing up, she never liked violence. She never trusted anyone who fought. Be it for sport or something stupid. But, even though Donald Na was talking to her solely for his entertainment (and he made that clear), he didn't exactly hurt her. She hasn't run into any more fights either, more importantly, ones that involved him.
This just let her have one more person to talk to. Though, she still felt an icky feeling bubbling in her stomach as she thought of her only use to him was for a cure to boredom. It was better than being flat out teased and mocked for being herself, she concluded.
She exited out of the window that held his contact and called Haneul. Unlike when she was on the verge of a breakdown by herself outside, she had stuff to tell the girl instead of just wasting her time randomly. Her friend quickly answered, leaving her barely waiting.
"What's up, my In-na?~" Haneul sang out after she picked up.
"Haneul!" Lotus jumped up in excitement, "I have some stuff to fill you in on!"
Outside her room, in the main room, the boys had settled down. Jeongsoo was still gone and Cole was doing his homework in his room. Chance sat down on the couch, leaving room between him and Jin.
Jin just turned his head to stare at him. He sighed and rolled his eyes, shoving his foot into Chance's leg. The rough appearing boy jumped at the impact.
"What the fuck was that for?" Chance snapped at him.
That face resembling a rabid dog didn't scare Jin like it did Lotus. The younger boy just rolled his eyes once more. He had seen worse from boys who fought him.
"You're dumb. Dumb as hell." He said, "I'm going to tell mom you forced Lotus to stay out until dark."
"I don't give a fuck." Chance cussed him out, "Mom's just going to ask her and her pussy ass won't say a thing."
Jin scoffed and turned back to watch TV, "You're such a dick."
Chance clicked his tongue and kicked his leg as revenge before settling down. Paz, who was sitting on the floor the entire time, blinked at the two idiots.
"You know mom and dad don't want us to cuss, right?" He continued, "You'll get Cole to start doing it."
"Shut up," Chance and Jin sneered at him.270Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTfDF7iTTPD
