Shell POV:
Ouch. Shit. This hurts. But I mean...I haven't been sent to the hospital from school in 4 years, so I think that's a record. So just a recap of what happened, Randy decided it was a good idea to punch me, for the 100th time this year, and sure enough I now have internal bleeding. I don't really give much of a shit this time. Yeah I may be in incredible pain, but I really don't like giving Randy much of a reaction. It's what he wants from me. But the real thing is my friends might give him a reaction. And I obviously don't want that the happen.
Creepy music box starts playing*
Okay now that's...not right. Welp. Imma die.
Wait.
Crap that's my ringtone for Jason. Crap.
I picked up the phone and before I hit "answer" I thought of something to say as a joke to let him know I'm Okay. I got it.
"Hello, this is the Rose family's mortuary! Are you calling about a deceased loved one that's in our care? Or perhaps to make a reservation for the Italian pizza and pasta cafe next door, where yesterdays loss, is todays pasta and sauce" I said into the phone.
Jason didn't reply, so I was about to say "Just kidding" but then he hung up. I think I may have scared him. I don't understand. I thought that was kind of funny. Was it disturbing? Because I don't think that was disturbing at all.
I felt kind of bad, so I texting him a very funny meme. "Smile through the pain" It's hilarious. As soon as it sent, A nurse with red hair walked into the room.
"Hey Shell" She said as she walked next to me.
"Oh hey. I think I may have scared your-"
"Ann! Ann! What type of fucking drugs did you give her?!"
"Jason!"
"Sorry you expect me to sit back and relax when the medications you're giving her are making her crazy?! As soon as I picked up the phone, She said Hello this is the rose family's mortuary. Are you calling about a deceased loved one that's in our care? Or perhaps to make a reservation for the Italian pizza and pasta cafe next door, where yesterdays loss, is today's pasta and sauce. You seriously think that's normal!?"
"Oh...I said that as a joke to make you know I'm doing ok!" I said, laughing at that. That has got to be one of my most hilarious jokes.
Ann looked disturbed. And Jason was staring at me with "Wtf" face. I don't know why he's looking at me like that.
"Shell...No. You can't...you can't say things like that." Jason said, exhausted.
"Why not?" I asked, completely confused.
"Shell. Can you repeat that entire "joke" for me?"
"Hello this is the rose family's mortuary. Are you calling about a deceased loved one that's in our care? Or perhaps to make a reservation for the Italian pizza and pasta cafe next door, where yesterdays loss, is today's pasta and sauce." I said, not able to stop laughing.
"Shell...what do you mean by "where yesterdays loss is today's pasta and sauce"?"
I died laughing. I was unable to speak normally for like the next 12 minutes.
"I...I mean *snicker* I meant they...they *pfft* I can't!!!"
I need to put that on a t-shirt.
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