To further "punish" me, Jonas withdrew his mind from mine completely during the week I was confined to the bedroom. This had the unexpected effect of clearing some of his brainwashing, and I was relieved to know I hadn't been in the wrong for calling him out the week before, and I was equally as thankful that I hadn't been going crazy - he really HAD been manipulating my emotions.
To ensure he couldn't fool me again, I spent the week reading the magic books he kept on a shelf in the bedroom. He'd never told me I couldn't, so I made use of my spare time to construct a shield to make sure he couldn't trick me into being his bootlicker again. It wouldn't last - he'd get through to me eventually - but I felt more prepared to keep my inner self untouched from his cruelty, at least for a little while.
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A week later, Jonas came onto the room as I was finishing breakfast. I felt my chest tighten as it always did whenever he was around, but the shield I'd constructed kept the worst of his influence at bay as his mind invaded mine once more. "I hear you've been reading," he said. "I never gave you permission to read. Nor did I give you permission to eat, or sleep, or to wear clothes. Or to use the bathroom."
I kept my face as meek as I could, feeling old shame rise to the surface again. But I wouldn't let him gaslight me into believing I was unworthy of the most basic of human needs. As per his instructions, however, I kept my mouth shut.
Jonas raised an eyebrow. "I see you're staying obedient in one aspect at least," he said. "Get up."
Heart pounding, I did as I was told. "Kneel," Jonas instructed me. Once I was on my knees, he struck me across the face, sending me flying. But the physical pain was nothing compared to the emotional toll as he ripped my flimsy protections aside and seized full control of me once more. "You should have known better than to try and fool me," he said mildly, seizing my hair and hauling me back into a kneeling position. "I ought to beat you black and blue. I ought to make you sleep outside, and strip you naked. I should deprive you of food, and make you beg for the scraps from my table."
I held still, sick with humiliation. "But I'm merciful," Jonas said. He seized my hair again, forcing me to look up at him. "You have only to tell me how you truly feel. I'd rather have your loathing for me out in the open, my dear."
It was probably a trap, but I no longer cared. "I don't like you," I said. "I thought something of you once, and would have been content to marry you, but you're a jerk now, and I HATE you for playing me false the way you did."
"Your cousin MURDERED my son," Jonas reminded me in a tight voice. "Is it any wonder I wanted nothing to do with your pack afterwards? How the hell could I go back to holding you in no small measure of regard?"
"I don't blame you for being upset," I said. "But I am NOT Pearl. I'm me. If you can look past what she did and see me for who I am, we might actually stand a chance at salvaging this sorry excuse for a marriage. I'm willing to let your bastardry slide if you stop tarring me with the same bloody brush!"
Jonas stared down at me, his face expressionless. After a long moment, he let my hair go and silently gestured me to stand. "You're right," he admitted. "But Ryan was my firstborn, and seeing him be murdered was a blow I can't ever let go, not until Pearl lies dead at my feet. Still, you are right. I have let my grief turn me into a monster. I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to walk away - I'd probably do the same."
"If you really want to make it up to me," I said, "then help the authorities to find Pearl so they can save Dakota from being turned into a monster."
"I can't do that," Jonas said bluntly. "I might as well give you the bad news - after your rightful bollocking of me the week before, I got in touch with Pearl and told her to take Dakota across the Channel. She's out of reach now, and she's likely claimed sanctuary with a local pack. Not even the French authorities will be able to apprehend her. I'm sorry."
I stared at him in disbelief before slapping him in the face as hard as I could. "You're an arsehole," I said, sick inside with anger and the most bone-deep hurt I'd suffered ever since the loss of almost all my family. "You can go to hell - we're through."
"Wait," Jonas insisted. "Cass, there could still be a chance. Just listen to me, please."
I turned, my hand still on the doorknob. "I begged you on bended knee to help me last week," I said. "You forced me to suck you off, and then you went and did the one thing that's guaranteed I'll never want to speak to you on this side of the Wheel. Well guess what - shoe's on the other paw now. We're done." So saying, I turned and left, slamming the door behind me. 93Please respect copyright.PENANAYLQhjsVgbU