Today was the first day of 1st grade. I was ready. I had my new, cool blue backpack stuck to my back, filled to the brim with an assortment of notebooks.
I walked into my elementary school. Yeah, that's right. I'm an elementary schooler. I'm super cool. Like, suuuuuuper cool. I'm so cool that I don't even talk to girls.
Stop stop stop stop- what was that last part? I was following with you for the first half, but as soon as you started talking about not talking to girls, I got lost.
What do you mean I don't talk to girls? I thought you get all the ladies (exaggerating)!
Well, I do talk to girls. Just not ones out of my friend group.
AHA LOOK AT ME I DO HAVE LOTS OF FRIENDS I EVEN HAVE MULTIPLE FRIEND GROUPS
I was part of a group of friends. We didn't have a cool name (unlike... the future generation), but we had something else cool. We had the same class for four years in a row. From kindergarten to third grade, we always had the same class. Either someone was messing with us, or we got lucky four times in a row. Because these people... they were pretty cool.
Now introducing: Tawny!
Tawny is a shy half-Asian half-White girl. She likes art (like me) and cute animals. She was the one that I was the most friends with in the group (that's why... I introduced her first...?).
Romina is a loud Hispanic girl (another girl! ha!) who is either really angry or really excited, depending on her mood or whatever's going on that day. She's somewhat popular with the grade, but maybe that's just because of her volume.
Marley's the next girl (BOOM THAT'S RIGHT THAT'S THREE). She's full Asian (not sure why I've been describing their race first) and full of energetic-ness. She's obsessed with pigs and has a huge amount of friends. Like, a huge amount. Like, maybe even half of the grade (there were only 250 ish people in the grade). That's impressive.
Now, you know how many friends Marley has, but have you heard about... Cameron? He's (a guy this time) probably friends with the entire first grade, and has debatably the best hair, clothing, style, and everything else that has to do with fashion or whatever out of anyone I know. I don't really remember how I became friends with him (well, we had the same kindergarten class, I guess.), but I got some popularity from having the position of 'good friends with the popular kid', which, I gotta say, is pretty cool..
You may be asking: Where are these characters in the other book (the non-special one that you should maybe read)?
Well, after third grade when we all split up from our classes, we all... fell apart. I joined another group of friends, the popular three got even more popular as more people joined the school, and Tawny... hmm...
That's not the point of this. I just wanted to flex that I have friends. I mean, Tawny's not important now, but will be later.
There's a different girl that's important.
Do you remember the first chapter of the first book of this series? I mentioned something very briefly. It was a little something about a girl named...
Ashely.
Don't go back to that chapter- it'll spoil this chapter's ending. For now, just read this chapter.
One day, I was hanging out with my friends at recess. It started raining, and we ran under the roof of the school, but didn't go outside cause the rain was 'supposed to stop soon'.
The five of us huddled in a group, 'staying warm' until we saw lightning. Four seconds later... BOOM
A ton of children started screaming. Did not expect half the entire grade to be scared of thunder. Or, of course, some people screamed and everyone else did it too to be funny. You know, that's probably what happened.
We all jumped up, even me (Not because I was scared, but because the others did. Of course.), and when we came back down, Tawny fell forwards a little and pushed into the rest of the group. We all started cracking up (it was just that funny), and we all fell backwards. I fell backwards, too, but not into empty space. I bumped straight into someone.
"Ow!"
"Sorry!"
I turned around to see who I ran into. It was a girl who was shivering, with her arms crossed and huddled over. She had a couple of people behind her, who were engaging in a conversation. Her friends.
She stared at me after I apologized. I stared back at her for a little bit.
So. She was short. Light, dirty blonde hair, and was wearing a light blue shirt with unicorns on it and white jean shorts.
She was also pretty... cute.
Like, more than the average girl. I stared for a while, expecting her to turn her head, but she didn't.
I kinda... liked looking at her.
I... thought she was really... cute.
"Sorry. I'm Alan."
I said. I didn't put my hand out to shake (elementary kids don't do that- I think), and she didn't either.
"I'm Ashely."
Nice. Okay.
I feel something weird. Looking at her face makes me feel weird. I think I've been looking at her for a long time. I don't know what that's called, but I'm doing it. And she's not looking away from me, either.
"I feel weird."
"Same."
She agreed with me? That hardly ever happens.
"Um..."
"What teacher do you have?"
She's just going straight into it, isn't she? Doesn't matter. I like how she described the teacher like they're some kind of object. You know, by saying 'what', implying it's an object instead of a person- never mind. Hmm... Huh. This might be saying something about society.
"I have Ms. [don't feel like coming up with a creative last name], you?"
"Oh my gosh my brother had her!"
Oh my gosh how does that matter! Wait, no, I'm not fourth grade me right now. I'm first grade me. He would probably care about it.
"Oh, that's so cool!"
"Yeah! I have Ms. [don't feel like coming up with a creative last name again]."
"Oh my gosh my sister had her!"
I have a sister? Not important, I could have just been lying to appear... cooler. Lying is what kids (age doesn't matter) do all the time to seem cool. Like, they'll exaggerate everything about themselves and say the dumbest stuff you've ever heard just to seem cool. And it works for some reason. It's kinda funny.
She started laughing. I did too. I didn't have any social awareness, so my scream-laughing (it got better over time) might have been incredibly loud. I don't know. I doubt people could hear it over the lighting.
BOOM
Right the lightning that's still going on
Uh so you know that boom that just went off? Well, apparently it scared even more people than the last boom.
"AAAAAAAAAAA!"
No, guys, I wasn't the one who screamed. It was Ashely that time.
She jumped, like, physically hopped (maybe she's scared of lightning?) and ran towards me. I backed up and rose my hands up. I guess I was prepared for her to fall on me, and then I could catch her, like one of those Disney movies. You know I don't understand where I thought that from
She touched me. Her shoulder brushed against the top of my chest, almost falling on me, but she caught herself.
Nope. I felt even weirder now.
She's cute. She touched me. We've talked. What's this weird feeling?
Do I have a crush on her?
I think... I do...
"Ashely, you're scared of lightning?"
"No! Of course not!"
"Well, you jumped like 8000 feet high, and screamed louder than... a bomb!"
Wowwww first grader logic amiright?
"No!"
"Yeah, you're like... dynamite!"
"Hehehehe..."
Honestly kids can say anything, I could substitute anything for the word 'dynamite' and it would make sense to them.
"Um, what sports do you play?"
She's asking what sports I play instead of if I play sports? That doesn't make sense. Is she assuming I play sports? Red flag.
"Soccer, baseball, basketball, swimming, what sports do you do?"
God- um, yeah. I played a lot of sports. I did some baseball, which I did until like high school, same with soccer, and I stopped playing basketball- you'll find out about basketball. And then... there's swimming. Uh... yeah. Swimming. Whoo. Hey, I was pretty good at it! My height (I think that's a good swimming attribute. If I'm, like, insulting swimmers, then... sorry.) helped me be really good at the backstroke! Another things is uh- you know the stroke that looks like a frog? It's called breaststroke- I know, I know, I'm being immature, but if you look closely at the name... it says BREAST stroke. HAAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAA what are we doing, stroking b- actually, if I say that, I could get like, banned. Uh, like the swimming, the swimming stroke, nothing weird or sexual. Yeah.
"I'm in gymnastics!"
"So, you like, jump around?"
I jumped around, mimicking what I thought gymnasts do. She laughed.
"No, I do flips!"
"Can you do one now?"
Hmm... there was a lot of us crowded around in the one roofed area, meaning there was no space to just run around. So, the only flip she could do would be... A BACKFLIP LETS SEE IT CMON ASHELY
"No, I need a trampoline, you dummy."
Hey, I didn't- what'd you just call me?
"Hey, did you just call me a dummy?"
She giggled.
"Hey! I'm not dumb! I always get 100s on everything!"
We've also had no tests, quizzes, or anything besides a coloring book as an assignment, but sure, kid Alan, good job on getting 100s on everything.
"Really?"
She aggressively put her hands on her hips. I made a mad face.
"Yes! I bet you... failed like, 10 things!"
Ooooooh burn
Yeah this is the type of insult we give each other
"Hey, I've failed nothing! You liar!"
What did I lie about? You mean I lied about if you failed- how was I supposed to know that?
"I'm not a liar! You... are a liar!"
Another sick roast.
"NO!"
"Yes! You... dummy!"
Wow, I'm popping off on these insults now.
"Hey!"
I started giggling. She did too. We both laughed pretty hard. Children laugh at the dumbest things.
She stopped giggling, then looked at her shirt. It was drenched, so she took the bottom of it and held it up, wringed it, and wove it up and down. I was still looking while this happened, and just so happened to see her stomach.
Then I noticed something.
Be prepared.
"Ew! Is that your... belly button?"
I whispered that to her so I didn't make a scene.
"Hey!"
"You're weird! Never mind!"
I ran away.
Yeah. That's it. I saw her belly button, got scared, and ran away.
"Alan? What's wrong?"
Tawny walked up to me, after I found a safe place.
"Nothing, just saw... a monster!"
I'm joking.
Every time I would see her, from then on, I would run away. Just every single time, see her, then wouldn't, because I'd have ran away. When she moved away in like, I don't know, 3rd grade, I didn't even see her goodbye. I didn't need to, I was too busy preparing for the next school year, which I knew was gonna be bad (I'm joking, I couldn't have ever known the next year would be anywhere near as bad as it was). But... maybe I developed a fear of girls. I wasn't gonna risk seeing another belly button again. Maybe I have a fear of belly buttons.
Whatever, thanks for hearing me talk about my adventures of becoming a Omphalophobe, and see you in... about a half year.
Until I see you again, listen to a piece of advice. Remember to not talk to girls.266Please respect copyright.PENANAwlgwSRO4bv