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White light filled my vision, as I came into consciousness. Everything was white, no matter where I looked. Then, I realized, that I moved. I lifted my hand - I have a hand! I think… -, but it too was white. I looked down, and I saw a featureless, white body. Even as I touched my stomach, it was hard to make it out. I called out.
I did not expect the result. My voice, it was strange. It was like multiple people spoke at the same time, once masculine, then feminine, and back. Why is my voice like that? And why am I not scared, or freaked out about it?
And now, that I think about that… Who am I?
“Welcome to the emptiness, new one.” A sudden voice came from behind me, one that was almost the same as mine, except it started with a feminine one, then turned into masculine and back. As I turned around, I met with something new. Something beautiful. A new color.
It was… silver! Yes, it was a white, silk dress, with silver lining at its edges. As my eyes trailed upwards, I saw the other person. Or… thing? I think they were the same as me: completely white, no features, no face. If it weren’t for the dress, I wouldn’t even notice them. I’m surprised that they saw me.
“Umm… Hello?” I answered uncertainly, unable to decide how to approach my new companion. Did they know me? No, then they would have greeted me with my name.
My name… do I even have one? Now, that I think about it, I cannot remember anything. But then again, I can think, I know the meaning of the words I use. Maybe I just have amnesia? But what about my body, why am I featureless? Or maybe this is how everyone is?
No, then why would we have the word featureless in the first place…
My thought process was cut short by the person in front of me, coming closer.
“I bet you don’t understand or remember anything. But not to worry, it will all come back and make sense eventually. My name is Persona.” Persona extended their hand, and with a little trouble, I was able to take and shake it. It was starting to become a little disorienting, not seeing your own limbs.
“You may be wondering where we are, and the answer to that is very simple. This place is the emptiness, where nothing exists, well, not yet. This place exists outside time and space, as it hasn’t been born yet.” As they explained, I let go of their hand, and looked around. Emptiness. A fitting name for this place. But wait…
“Born… If there is no time and space, how are we here? And why?” I turned back to them, not understanding how someone can exist if there is nothing. They smiled… I think. At least I heard as they giggled.
“To start things up, of course! Someone has to bring darkness to the light to create a universe. And that’s here you come into place. I’m going to take colors away from you, to give you an appropriate appearance, and you are going to use these colors, and transform them into energy, which when let out, will create an explosion. From that, the universe will be born.” That was too crazy to believe. But there was no other explanation to it. But me?
“What, am I like, a God, or something?” I asked, skeptical about this whole thing. Maybe I was just captured, and experimented upon by…
By who? And who could have done this?
“Of course, you are~!” Answered Persona in a sing-song voice. It was too freaky, with the changing voices to be considered good sounding. They continued before I could say anything.
“You are the new one, or God, if this is how you want yourself to be called. I know it’s a little strange, but you will get to know everything. First however, we will have to give you an appearance. Or, rather me. The previous one has been given a male look and personality, so you will get a female one.”
“You… can give me an appearance?” I asked, not wanting to believe it all. But there really doesn’t seem to be any other explanation. At least, not that I could come up with.
“Yes, I can. That is the first part of my job, which is to give an appearance and personality to all of your future creations. But, for now, you will be the first one. Are you ready?”
I wasn’t. I still didn’t feel anything, but I just simply couldn’t understand all this. Why me? And a God… Wasn’t there already one? Persona did talk about the other one being a male…
“Yes…” I sighted eventually. I might as well just go ahead and see what the future has for me.
“This is going to sting a little, but then you will feel better. And, you will feel.” Said Persona, before lifting both of her hands.
A garbled mess of masculine and feminine scream left my mouth as I dropped to the floor in agony. This did not sting! This was as if my skin was being peeled off everywhere at the same time!
Stop it! Please, I’m begging, end this agony!
“Per… Persona…!” I cried out, as I started to shake on the floor. They said something, but I couldn’t understand what.
My vision started to blur, and for the first time, I felt something. I felt fear…
Then everything turned black.
***
When I woke up, several new feelings rushed me. The fear turned to anger, for how Persona lied to me about how much it will hurt. Then to curiosity, about what have happened to me, and soon that turned into excitement.
As I slowly sat up, everything around me was still white, but when I looked down, I was met with my new skin, which was a warm beige color, with a few freckles on it. I felt a smile come to my face, as I looked at my new body, pulling one of my hands on my leg, up to my chest, cupping one of my breasts, which almost didn’t fit into my palm. I definitely liked this new body, but as I put my palm to my face, I realized, that I don't know how my face looks. Pulling my hair forward, I was it had a simple brown color.
“I see you woke up.” Came the happy sounding, but still messed up voice of Persona from my right. As I looked at them, I watched the swirling colors floating around them in awe. I never saw such a beautiful thing before, not that I have seen much anyways.
“Yes…” I answered, now having a feathery feminine voice, to which I put a hand on my neck. My vision suddenly became blurred, and for a moment I was worried that I’m going to lose my consciousness again, but then I felt something warm and tingly trailing down my cheeks. When I touched it, I quickly realized that those were tears. My first tears, and happy ones at that. Again, looked up at Persona, who held out a hand to me, which I took. As they helped me up, I run my thumb along the top of their hand, feeling the cold and perfectly smooth surface.
“Let’s drink a little bit of tea, while you get used to your new body. I will tell you more.” Before I could ask what are they talking about, a table, with two seats appeared out of nowhere, making me jump a little.
“Woah…” I muttered, as we slowly approached the table. It was much harder now to find my balance, as everything around us still didn’t have any color at all, and my only point of stability came from the table and the swirling mass of colors.
As we sat down, a teapot, with two cups appeared, and the smell of the tea hit me. Ginger and cinnamon. It was so familiar, but I couldn’t find the memory as to why. I took the teapot, and poured for the two of us, but I kept stealing glances at Persona. It was so strange to see them like this. Why didn’t she take away from her own colors, to create an appearance?
“May I ask a question first? Why don’t you take away your own colors, to give yourself an appearance?” The question left my mouth before I could think. My sudden curiousness caught Persona in surprise, but soon they leaned back, taking the tea into their hands. How are they plan on drinking? In fact, how do they speak? I didn’t see them having a mouth… I thought.
“Because I can’t.” Came the short answer, to which I frowned a little.
“But you just did it with me.” I retorted, lifting the cup to my mouth, and taking a sip. I had to close my eyes, as the warmth of the tea spread out inside me, bringing a smile to my face.
“That was an exception.” The message that I sent with my look must have arrived, because Persona quickly continued. I think they looked… uncomfortable? “I can only do it once. After the previous God dies, I receive a small part of their power, before everything collapses. From the five guardians, only I exist currently, because you have yet to create the first plane, which the previous God named ‘Heaven 2.0’. It wasn’t too original, to be honest. Outside of time and space, only I can exist, because it is my duty as the Guardian of Personalities and Appearances, to summon and provide the new one with the necessities. The last drop of that power left me as I extracted the colors from you, so that you could convert them into energy, and create everything. Only then, will I get back my powers, to change my appearance and personality to my liking. Or to yours, if that is what you wish.” Her tone suddenly changed at the last sentence, and I felt my face heat up a little. That was unexpected. Just what did the previous god do?
The more I thought about it, the more complicated it became. So, I really am a god from now on. Or, soon I will be one. And the remaining guardians will only come after I created space and time, and a place for them, to exist.
But one thing still didn’t feel right. Why do I feel guilty? I haven’t done anything, and yet, for some reason, I feel guilt seeping into my mind. Did I do something? They did say ‘summon’, not ‘create’. Or will I screw up in the future so badly that I can already feel it? Why me? Or did this summoning choose someone at random?
I slowly lay my hands on my thighs as they started trembling.
Why me? This same question kept repeating in my mind, as I looked at the white nothingness at my feet. Why does it suddenly feel like a curse, and not a blessing. Maybe I should just…
“You have been chosen for a reason.” Persona’s voice interrupted my thoughts and my eyes flicked up at them. Persona made sure that I am listening, before continuing.
“Your past correlates with the process of the summoning, but I cannot say more than that. There is a very good reason why you have been chosen, but this is not the time to explain that. It will come back to you eventually. You should stop tearing yourself apart by thinking about it. You won’t get an answer, until the time is right.” Persona had a point. And I hated it, because this just meant that I did do something to feel guilty for. And they knew about it.
But what should I do? Would I really be a good choice to be a god? What if…
No. I thought. I have to stop thinking about it, just as Persona said. It won’t help my mental health, and will certainly not help on this journey.
They suddenly stood up, and motioned for me to do the same. As I did so, the table, with the tea and chairs disappeared, leaving only me, Persona and the mass of colors, which somehow grew bigger.
“It is time for you to create the universe, with the first plane. Are you ready?”
No. I was not, and I am sure that Persona knew about it. But I cannot back down now. I have to move forward.
As I gave them a slight nod, my legs started to move on their own. My arm slowly risen into a horizontal position, stretching into left and right. It seems my body knew what it had to do, so I let go of myself, leaving this first job to it. No need for me to come, and screw it up right at the start.
The swirling colors seemed to react to my body’s movement, as they too, spread out into two directions, slowly approaching my hands. Then I started to rotate my arms in a counter-clockwise motion, and the colors followed, starting to shine brighter and more radiant. I felt the heat they emitted, and it just became more intense as my arms stopped, after making a 180-degree rotation.
Then I slowly started to slide my arms on each other, getting the palm of my hands closer and closer. The colors now changed into pure energy, loosing their original form, and started to form a tight ball in the location where my hands are supposed to meet.
This time, however, I felt something, a barrier of an opposing force, trying to stop my palms from enclosing the energy. I started to push them together, using all of my strength to do so, forcing my eyes shut from the blinding light.
And then, my hand completely closed around the energy ball. Everything became easier, the barrier disappeared, and I felt immense power filling me. The warmth of it was liberating, as many emotions rushed over me.
All my worries, all my fears left me, as I opened my eyes, looking at Persona.
Then I opened my hands, letting go of the energy.
ns 18.68.41.137da2
