Okay, here's some background knowledge. I post dad jokes daily (well, almost daily), and I finally can put them to good use. I hope it's okay that I just lumped basically all my jokes into one entry.
Why did the ghost use the elevator?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lFhoeTtqP
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvGj73iCi3
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgJmPSAqFdu
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡth5W2yFL7U
To lift his spirits.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7EzKnDyFk
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnomwcxiKWQ
What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAhzCkm75m
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECqrNNZ3mW
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hSFSYjCWO
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzs5xmAskoL
Claude.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUcqaOWI9tx
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpizUX3mRCG
Why did the number of parking tickets spike when Persephone was carried off to the Underworld?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7huUbsOtWj
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQu094XuWD
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09LkfKqX8m
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzTaeKeQY0i
Demeter wasn't working.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRckKIgPk1U
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsYv4ZLpW0
Yesterday I was washing my car with my son.
He said, "Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSfQsRIQD5v
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzpjXjGGQGo
Genie: What is your final wish?
Kid: I wish I were you.
Genie: Weurd, but alrught.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9rcwxYkjk
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCnkfwfYUSY
What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WjXGU7Vge
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFGDofJMYV
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAg3ofENBwz
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdfQy2AyRa
"Bison."375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDSGKh3s3EH
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Vmw9lgo6W
Bread is like the sun.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMIW6MjetF
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqhg2bn9gb
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGFJSyOePC
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy1hRnMZPnq
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80zpa5J1Zk
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjb3yvNmxvb
A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
"You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!"
The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnmXFUO8RO
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm25W3lz7bN
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvhvjlaj8A
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhtBYfSNzv0
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkaQM585roQ
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZwdsmyCrl
Its butt.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVHum3bYItt
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9R8jGiJfRt
Two windmills are standing on a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ETHbLNMOr
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAn1S0XFEIk
How do you get a farm girl to marry you?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RSq8Q1q3z
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPj03cuGKi
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrLSJRjmhbU
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFG1Ev4ODS
First, a tractor.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43B5MV2qlu
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhm3FtR6W4w
Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. But if you remove it, you get...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkM6g2ygh5Z
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAaIsr3ZCrS
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9veMitTDm
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QVP6oWxFw
Gravy.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGDj5Q2LAd3
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2TdLn3lP9
Medusa caught the eye of a street musician.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmxH7keiWk
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqnpOCStNud
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qJhsHIniS
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYtb5gLXPQ
Now he's a rockstar.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqNomeUxfq
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HyQ7QvZWm
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after almost 6 months. She asked the doctor about her baby.
The doctor said, "You had twins, a girl, and a boy. They're both fine. Your brother named them for you."
The woman said, "No! My brother is an idiot! What did he name the girl?"
The doctor replied, "Denise."
The woman said, "Oh, that's pretty. What about the boy?"
The doctor let out a deep sigh, and said, "Denephew."375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQVMs47Crfz
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEASWIuEzp
Do trees poop?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8rdZO0JhVq
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfSEmnfdNxQ
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUVay96UpW
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDaj0jzvzf
Of course they do. How else would we get #2 pencils?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEjbvluOzoU
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSwbyr2fwVW
What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE17P5bVlud
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9PQnn7h4M
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu3hQRW6eSY
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxbC3pmFsu8
A "do-you-think-he-saurus."375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡleSbdOdyBB
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SUqlVKTjZ
Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsOhn7Bkq9n
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNTLNQuAGH
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IMMZj36xQ
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnGA6mTHBx
She couldn't control her pupils.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FvYmerjSA
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZpvjFznP0
What do peppers do when they're angry?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvhn3x0FmZ
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRVsvwxJEe
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtNNQ4qjfe
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2fkN7Z4K1
They get jalapeño face.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCLFT3eBs1
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOeH5Fioc2p
Today someone told me I am average.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXKAtSPZIw7
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vAbBqEdA0
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7jlC9W0yM
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSFd2YmmR0S
I told them that's just mean.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnQFqRzs29
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHDimDrC60i
What do you call a pencil with two erasers?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRFkSlFsueF
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrx9SkYjXOI
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYJxoLjTIl
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIOoyGxwmq
Pointless.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxix4yvTrg
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSr3U72AdiI
Dude 1: "Hey bro?"
Dude 2: "Yeah bro?"
Dude 1: "Can you hand me that pamphlet?"
Dude 2: "Brochure."375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2FjxU4svtp
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1fzm8AS9X
Did you hear about the racing snail who got rid of his shell?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb91eodSemE
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXz2roRPSWs
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUrbb5oOgXy
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqj5xyVTMKN
He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqGJGDpT8Ee
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqsvsOPniX
Have you ever tried to catch fog?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9vXS5doCE
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6zeQ6Iqil0
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKUtFJ8oaeJ
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszmBRrbku0
I tried yesterday but I mist.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDCToFXDDH
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5TRyoE3f6
Why can't you ever run through a campsite?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEcNoxHdX1n
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJNlj4zoBn8
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtywGW24Ynl
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWPKJnsbLu
You can only ran—it's always past tents.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbbFoSxg04T
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZgkbDMKg9
What country's capital is growing the fastest?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBvl8y8CUS
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNxDZ0NVMF
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwA9HyLd6Aa
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99qqpMF2Bn
Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjqN9lMDgv
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHYMummwfFZ
What has four wheels and flies?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuHeYXt0Hwy
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXymyM2Y5u
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6L39qyB7tI
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7bLL9AFTt
A garbage truck.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbY8os6UXd1
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaB54TJmsx7
I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡELfad7LatC
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRAssjCSWr3
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV2ZeKTJ1K
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN3Lz9w5Bq9
...so I pushed her over.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnwA6K4Xa5
---375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs7uqPebpGX
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWyvpWMuG7P
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFZSFsjCO0
...375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVtBnUjyYHf
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRQCs7dWNC
If they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjJdSQz6G4
---
375Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92lneR6tHn
Uh, yeah. That's all I got.
ns 15.158.61.46da2
