No matter how much I try, some thoughts never leave my mind. “You are not yourself.” “I am not myself.” “It needs it.” “It needs Love."
WHAT DOES IT MEAN!?
…
…
…
Why do I want to know everything…?
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I looked back at Steel, who seemed to have a terrified, but seemingly happy look.
“Well, wasn’t that a blast.” She laughed to herself.
“What even happened?” I questioned.
She turned his head, looking down the narrow hallway, “Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”279Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHeDwvCqgL
“You know that is where all our records are, right.” I gave her a glare.
“Yup! Definitely knew that!” She responded, a little sarcasm slipped through his mouth.
I told her it was time to go, but she refused to let me walk.
“You can’t leave! You mustn't leave this floor! If you do, you are going to be killed!” She shook me pretty violently while saying that.
“But what else am I going to do? I have a purpose. And that purpose is to find this “home!”
“Your purpose will be SHATTERED WHEN YOU GET MURDERED BY YOUR LIFELONG FRIEND BILLY OVER THERE!!” She then points in a random direction.
“But what good is it to stay here?” I asked.
She sighed, clearly losing the battle.
“Let’s get a move on!” I said, happily starting to skip down the hallways.
We walked down the long hallway that connects all the rooms together. With the lights on, it makes for a much calmer and safer walk.
“How are you alive?” She asked.
“Uhhh. I don’t really know to be honest. All I know is that I was pushed by something-or someone-down into the chamber with the heart-helping drug.” I looked down to the ground. “And now I’m back.”
She started to talk to me, but I started to zone her out.
I like flooring. Every single flooring has different patterns. Some have small squares, some have big squares. Some are blue, some are white. Some have more than one color. Some are dull. Some have cracks and glitter. All of them are so different.
The lab's floor is white. The squares were just big enough to put only one paw in. When I walk around the halls, I will always try to put one paw in each square. I usually look like a fool, but I don’t care what people think.
“Hey Ani. You are going a little slow right now.”
I zoned back in.
“Sorry!” I rushed back to get with her again.
“Hey. I wanna tell you something.” Steel told me, stuttering a little.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Do you wanna be my boy-” I didn’t even let her finish. I know what she was going to say.
“I’LL GLADLY BE YOUR BEST FRIEND!” I yelled.
She agreed. “yeah…” she looked to the room beside her. “Let’s go in here real quick.”
The room was red. The red paint was slowly chipping away. There was only a chair and a desk in the middle.
“What even is your plan on escaping?” She asked.
“I don’t really know. I have about 10 ways of escaping right now, but I don’t even know where to start.” I shrugged.
She let out a sigh.
“Such an i--ot…” she mumbled.
“Huh?” I asked.
“Nothing,” she replied back.
We kept to just a little small talk. It was the only thing I could say right now. I’m pretty awkward when it comes to talking to only one person. But I managed.
Steel is different from a lot of people. Although she is a woman, she acts like a male. She is way more rough-house-like around everyone. The other girls don’t really do that…
It fits her…
I find intelligence very interesting. When we started staying at this lab, we didn’t even know what a lab was. The random words we did not know. The books we couldn’t read. We couldn’t do anything.
But after learning what the words meant, we were interested. We wanted to know what all the words meant. In about a year, we knew how to read, and what everything means. The more we read, the more we learned. We even learned what a “gender” is.
I figured out that I am male, which kinda surprised me. Steel was the opposite of me. I find this interesting, but weird?
Who made these words?
Why are there words?
How were they formed?
Why do I always question everything?
Steel looked at me.
I said that out loud…
“What do you mean you question everything?” She cocked her head to the side.
“I don’t wanna talk about it.” I didn’t want anyone to know.
Why..?
I can’t deal with this. I told Steel to leave the room and make sure the cams were off.
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Why? Why do I have so many questions? Why do I want to know everything? Why am I questioning everything? Why do I question anything? Why is Steel acting so nice? Why does Steel want to help me? What does she want to do with me? What is her purpose? What is my purpose? How…? How was she so nice? How did she decide to help me? How does she want to stay with me? Why does she want to be my friend? Does she mean something different? Does she want to be close? Is she trying to tell me something? Is the person in my thoughts trying to tell me something? Is it me? Is it just me being crazy? Is it another one of us? Can everyone hear it too? Is it a human? Was the experiment on a human? Was I being used? Would I disappear if it failed? Did it fail? Did it succeed? Why was It broken? Was it because it overheated? Did I make it fail? Did I succeed? Did whatever on the other side make it fail? Did it make it succeed? How many different outcomes could that lead to? Could it have killed me? Could it have changed me totally? Could it have brainwashed me? Could it…? Why does Vin hate me? Why does Vin want to kill me? Would Vin be telling the truth? Would Steel tell the truth? Would she lie to me? Why do I want answers? Is it because I’m alive again? Is it because I just want to know? Will it be rude to ask Steel? Does she ever question everything? Is that just me? Are there other people who think like me? Am I all alone on this? Can anyone relate to me? Will I ever be normal? Will I finally stop asking questions? Will everything end when I figure everything out? Will I ever figure out everything? Can someone answer every question? Will someone answer every question? Will I answer every question? How would I answer every question? What is life? Do I know what life means? What is a human? Do I know what a human even is? Are humans smart? Did they use to be us? Are we smarter than humans? How do you tell the intelligence level of us? How do you tell the intelligence level of humans? Do you use a test? Do you use a machine? Can you just tell yourself? Why do we need to measure intelligence? Don’t we all have the same intelligence? Or do we have different intelligence? Why are some people smarter than others? Do some don't want to be smart? Is it genetic? Is it attitude? What about being smart? Is it genetic? Is it attitude? Why do you not want to be smart? Does being smart gives you more opportunities to answer questions? What if everyone was smart? Would that be good? Would that make me bad? What would happen if everything turned into chaos? Would we be able to solve it and calm it down? Would this planet be destroyed? What happens when a planet explodes? Does it create a heatwave? Does it move all other planets out of orbit? Does anything ever happen? Do people care about death? Does anyone miss someone if they die? Do they care? Can they care? Do they cry? Do they get sad? Or are they happy? Do they…? Do people like these questions? Would they still like me if they heard all these questions? Why do I want to know? Would someone answer all these questions? Will my questions ever get answered? Will I forget these questions? Why do we forget things? If we forget things, do we still care? Why do we all have names? What do our names mean? Why am I named Animato? Why don’t we just know each other in a different way? If I forget someone’s name, does it mean I don't like them anymore? Would it mean if I forget Steel, I don’t care about her? Does it mean I care for people who I know the names to? Does it mean that I care for Vin? Does it mean that I’m still friends with him? Does he still remember me? Does that mean we are still friends? Do I need to forget him? Why do I only remember Steel and Vin? Do I only care for them? Do I want to care for them? Are they going to care for me? Why would I care for them if they don’t care for me? Is that considered mean? Am I mean? Am I nice? What does it mean to be mean? What does it mean to be nice? Am I??
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What does everything mean?
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What…?
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