Sweating the Small Stuff...121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNPdwraiPCG
Growing up, people would ask me, why it seemed like I lacked other normal feelings and emotions people would express.
And as it turns out, I would give people the same answer: that most of them were not even necessary to express or show publicly.
Little did they know.. I wasn't good at controlling them, so I'd let most of the complex ones slide..
Remember when I said that my emotions tend to get the better of me? Well, I had never really given into the thought of missing someone, because without actually experiencing it, I already kind of knew that somehow it was hard to miss someone.
This one time, a family friend I knew from a group of family friends promised me that before he went back to school, he was going to come and visit me.
Thus, schools opened, and I waited for him that day, but he never showed up, and he went to school without saying goodbye. Sensically, it shouldn't have mattered, not one bit. I think.. But..
Instead of me feeling sad and getting over missing him, I was completely devastated, and my heart literally started hurting. 'The whole psychogenic pain thing... (sigh)
I cried a lot because I felt let down somehow. I don't know. And ever since that incident, I've never given myself the absolute and complete luxury of missing someone.
Everything might sound odd and nonsensical, but it's kind of how it makes it easy on my senses to just be apathetic.121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHQfe4aUirT
