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很久很久沒有寫文章了。11Please respect copyright.PENANAJ3mi1JUbPi
就像之前短篇的敘事,並非是美好而溫馨的。11Please respect copyright.PENANAjvrXjOOcua
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0111Please respect copyright.PENANAnrRcfuqUr7
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『世界上最遙遠的距離』11Please respect copyright.PENANA1ufZKrUooQ
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所以我看著你對著別人露出,那不再屬於我的笑容。11Please respect copyright.PENANApciPYCpr6z
在你身後的我咬唇,轉身離開了那裡。11Please respect copyright.PENANAT36j9VYwTe
不能後悔。11Please respect copyright.PENANAtXVB3TWtx5
不能怨恨。11Please respect copyright.PENANAJkSU0LWwNF
不能再想。11Please respect copyright.PENANAhTPw8tyjDQ
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因為。11Please respect copyright.PENANAu1mipQeGfi
是我先推開了你給予我的擁抱。11Please respect copyright.PENANA8Nm9F3kbL1
拒絕了你對我的情感。11Please respect copyright.PENANARNtQyRACT2
忽視了你眼底的情慾。11Please respect copyright.PENANAnx8HAPIEiF
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因此。11Please respect copyright.PENANApzVaWC4yq1
我怎麼能哭泣。11Please respect copyright.PENANASTL67Dcfn2
我怎麼能悔恨。11Please respect copyright.PENANAjzGoh8ROlv
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因為是我自己造成這一切的啊。11Please respect copyright.PENANAvKGrFQBDXS
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「明明做那樣選擇的是自己,可為什麼還是感到了悔恨。」11Please respect copyright.PENANA5W710nGxun
「拒絕了你之後才愛上你。」11Please respect copyright.PENANA6LraNncSO3
「這樣的我令人厭惡。」11Please respect copyright.PENANA7vtBEFvcmF
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*11Please respect copyright.PENANAzXOm1RtLyQ
錯過與放棄。11Please respect copyright.PENANACKJyde54xM
於是悔恨交織。11Please respect copyright.PENANAApngmM72uY
如果雙方都互相喜歡,但在不對的時間說了同樣的話,那麼結局終究也只是失去。11Please respect copyright.PENANAJhxRzpCkhw
但造成這種局面的卻是自己。11Please respect copyright.PENANAuYLY2ZyMlZ
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0211Please respect copyright.PENANAKswLAuumJ4
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『If……』11Please respect copyright.PENANAEGn3COagX9
11Please respect copyright.PENANAUpkXc4vBlV
基爾伯特忽然頓住,熱燙的淚液毫無預警的自他頰面滑下,五臟六腑彷彿抽離血液似的,壓迫他喉嚨,使他急促地呼吸著。11Please respect copyright.PENANArSdiUaMJzv
半晌,在這沒有任何人存在的家中,他漸漸地停止了哭泣。11Please respect copyright.PENANA1QKK3zVdXg
望著淌滿自己體液的手,基爾伯特緩緩勾起一抹笑,眼裡模糊成晶亮的光景,閃爍著鑽石色彩。11Please respect copyright.PENANAtvwv3BmDWD
11Please respect copyright.PENANApd8OPgRGhy
如果任何淚水都是有理由的話。11Please respect copyright.PENANAcYtQaNqMGs
那麼,基爾伯特兀自忖思,他這種毫無緣由乍然傾瀉的疼痛,又代表著什麼。11Please respect copyright.PENANA93owcwQuSH
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*11Please respect copyright.PENANAiCoF0P7G7v
寫完後,友人看完之後畫了r18的圖........為什麼會是這種感想呢?(苦笑11Please respect copyright.PENANAQ4MOsTZiYg
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0311Please respect copyright.PENANAA1hyy1eEd5
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『給十年後未來的你』11Please respect copyright.PENANA8b34MYLIam
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『WEST!我們到樹下埋寶藏吧!』11Please respect copyright.PENANAICMywusc7P
活在記憶中地嗓音依然清晰如昨。11Please respect copyright.PENANAib45IfXt4w
11Please respect copyright.PENANA5kbfR9geC4
那時才剛結束分裂局面,國內一切都不穩固,有天兄長忽然很開心的拉著他手徑往外衝,手裡還拿著一罐玻璃瓶,透明的瓶子可見折半的白紙。11Please respect copyright.PENANAXA10U6bX98
11Please respect copyright.PENANALzC8wfUXIO
『你要記得十年之後再打開喔。』11Please respect copyright.PENANApbJqDLxoMp
那天午後的天氣十分的溫暖,沐浴在彷佛受神祝福的光輝下,由於掘土而整張臉髒呼呼的兄長掛著笑容,一邊叮囑著他。11Please respect copyright.PENANAoxorVwgFYG
11Please respect copyright.PENANAscp9CUTXsO
那時他究竟回答了些什麼呢……?11Please respect copyright.PENANAMp6nab7OM0
至今回想卻支離破碎。11Please respect copyright.PENANATsRxlAnlNW
11Please respect copyright.PENANAmmWRXovJDM
唯一記得的是在那一場日光中,他眼淚似乎就要因為日光而融化出眼眶的疼痛。11Please respect copyright.PENANAuJsA3pFEYa
11Please respect copyright.PENANAWvtCbk84v9
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如果存在的奇跡是真的存在的話。11Please respect copyright.PENANAMQcyDTDgsH
11Please respect copyright.PENANATckHRj8qPg
那麼,那一天之後就是盡頭了吧。11Please respect copyright.PENANAVwEjRcQVrp
11Please respect copyright.PENANAqrCFhzUwYW
早就該死亡了。11Please respect copyright.PENANA9SdwE0B8dX
早就該離開了。11Please respect copyright.PENANA2F4MbhxDpv
早就……11Please respect copyright.PENANAFv40PN86N8
早就什麼也無法碰觸了……11Please respect copyright.PENANANfLFv0ugEY
11Please respect copyright.PENANAwjFGYsCwEy
重逢後的每一天清晨醒來看見兄長安然無恙的睡躺在他身旁時都是奇跡。11Please respect copyright.PENANAbZR7g1YmLU
11Please respect copyright.PENANAt7NnLtgQce
他們能夠的相處的時間那麼少,少到讓他後悔莫及。11Please respect copyright.PENANArCRKtUmBqD
11Please respect copyright.PENANA5oMHc40Dys
為什麼不早這樣做呢……11Please respect copyright.PENANAK8bjGF0TeG
為什麼不能忍耐呢……11Please respect copyright.PENANAfYpWZ3GF99
11Please respect copyright.PENANAyGzqYrM1UG
一個失去人民與國土的國家,究竟能走到什麼地步……11Please respect copyright.PENANApysiItGMlk
11Please respect copyright.PENANAO1AdNtIey3
11Please respect copyright.PENANAiZ6WlVvVya
11Please respect copyright.PENANA9vNRiyowKs
『不要哭。』11Please respect copyright.PENANAf0EaHPY08G
最後,兄長只是這麼說。11Please respect copyright.PENANA2diyGx37sT
在風雪漸大的夜裡,在背後閃耀著五顏六色的煙花中這般輕喃。11Please respect copyright.PENANAxyGYI7I3QU
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那之後他仍舊過著一樣的日子。11Please respect copyright.PENANAZbUUtuM03w
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只是再也沒有人在家裡等他,再也沒有人在耳邊吵鬧。11Please respect copyright.PENANAc0Pf2nLap2
11Please respect copyright.PENANAadsrYo21Q3
到底過了多久呢?11Please respect copyright.PENANAFv96ADYcDq
也許久到他連幾年都不記得了吧。11Please respect copyright.PENANAfM5mmx8pim
他總是覺得兄長還存在在任何地方,只是他找不到罷了。11Please respect copyright.PENANARietCjaPHj
11Please respect copyright.PENANAF8oFB3vL3w
於是忽然那麼一天他想起那一個寶物。11Please respect copyright.PENANAU2JIHfpZVO
11Please respect copyright.PENANAtgTjc9omff
當時候的他寫了給未來的信件,那麼兄長一定也寫了什麼吧……11Please respect copyright.PENANAhFWsvQbEQN
11Please respect copyright.PENANApWum6qQxdt
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他拼命的挖土。11Please respect copyright.PENANAJlKHRs0Hyx
11Please respect copyright.PENANAHjQEou9mko
不過幾分,鐵制的蓋子便從泥裡翻出。11Please respect copyright.PENANAfaDHCLQDnr
11Please respect copyright.PENANAssjP5oDd8d
他費力的扭轉生銹的圓蓋,然後拿出放在裡面的信件。11Please respect copyright.PENANAUtqcbd4mC1
他第一個就翻開了兄長的信件,想看看兄長寫了什麼,卻愕然的啞口。11Please respect copyright.PENANAy5FpvC9Xd3
11Please respect copyright.PENANA5h2NKPJO62
那是一面白紙。11Please respect copyright.PENANAbrUbtvOtoD
由於在土裡待著,染上了土黃的 斑點。11Please respect copyright.PENANAzEywAmV318
11Please respect copyright.PENANAD6OUNpC36B
上頭甚麼也沒有寫。11Please respect copyright.PENANAtkLKHPfBxl
空白的,就像不曾有筆跡存在過。11Please respect copyright.PENANA2BEyJGsE7r
11Please respect copyright.PENANAEo702XymwV
11Please respect copyright.PENANAqzWf5DyaJH
11Please respect copyright.PENANAfrfJrmXG2Z
『不要哭。』腦裡不斷地迴響著兄長的聲音。11Please respect copyright.PENANAk9T7T5ZU22
11Please respect copyright.PENANAegV6KIdF9w
他臉上卻佈滿了淚痕。11Please respect copyright.PENANAlxIE1BfBCi
11Please respect copyright.PENANAYxStGi4wyw
11Please respect copyright.PENANAbJWamJ01Qv
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*********11Please respect copyright.PENANASXmU85OJbk
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看新聞有感。11Please respect copyright.PENANAsYxe57lOrs
新聞描述的非常哀傷,但我卻想到會不會是因為埋的人早就知道自己不存於世所以什麼也不寫,因為已經沒有未來了。所以寫甚麼都只是惘然。11Please respect copyright.PENANAPAsy1rFuGt
11Please respect copyright.PENANANU3CMhW7tl
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0411Please respect copyright.PENANAtwT5gIxFsQ
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「關於雪的聯想」11Please respect copyright.PENANAesM8cNapwb
11Please respect copyright.PENANATR8rRXfwN8
關於雪的記憶,充滿著童話與火爐,天冷時的熱飲,依偎在你懷裡聽著你美好的聲音。11Please respect copyright.PENANAKsXW9wdUIZ
那時總是小,張著眼只注視得到你,伸出手也只能觸碰到你滿佈繭的掌。11Please respect copyright.PENANA9lNAxmmcTO
乾澀的,卻熱和著。11Please respect copyright.PENANADkVFGuurg2
『你聽』11Please respect copyright.PENANA5IvIqscfZF
你抱著我幼小的身軀,指腹抹過窗戶。11Please respect copyright.PENANAPuEoNNhxx2
『雪聲落下來時候,是像這樣,一閃一閃的響著喔』11Please respect copyright.PENANAnEonxxEsVH
室內的火材劈啪地冒出零星火花。11Please respect copyright.PENANA4LHVCTYiDL
11Please respect copyright.PENANA1EZ2T28R22
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0511Please respect copyright.PENANA3kgS0fPjeC
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『踏雪無聲』11Please respect copyright.PENANAVvkFY6sivL
11Please respect copyright.PENANARRUthtVL9Y
乍然寂靜無聲。11Please respect copyright.PENANAobSaywNPIW
路德維希倏地轉身,一片銀白雪亮,折射著夜裡的月色,令人刺目。11Please respect copyright.PENANA7LMdEXTK01
他張大眼,張口不能言。11Please respect copyright.PENANA2m2GE681qW
方才和他說話的兄長消失的無影無蹤,明明還有餘溫的聲音,卻消失了,而在他身後蜿蜒的只有他一個人的足跡。11Please respect copyright.PENANAp2KH1aMFwH
11Please respect copyright.PENANAKiGfMvrWn7
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0611Please respect copyright.PENANA1M1DtU0s79
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「遙遠的童話故事」11Please respect copyright.PENANAoowCiymBth
11Please respect copyright.PENANA8qqkCzSNhm
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第一次看完索多瑪的120天的那陣子,只要他每天一想起片段都會忍不住嘔吐,即使他燒了書也無法竭止嘔出穢物的反胃。11Please respect copyright.PENANA5Mt1aZScSJ
現在他已經想不起故事,彷彿刻意消除痕跡似的,除了殘留在口腔裡膽汁的回憶之外,他腦中裡沒有任何關於故事的字句。11Please respect copyright.PENANAWtjcCY6PdM
11Please respect copyright.PENANAEjYqjumBmF
可即使一切什麼也不記得,但那種深深地醜陋情感卻扎根在他身體各位,完全無法擺脫。11Please respect copyright.PENANAfwn5C8bkW0
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0711Please respect copyright.PENANAMcDAKbcxx7
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『請幸福的……』11Please respect copyright.PENANAKgN8E4djcE
11Please respect copyright.PENANAKUtpFuiWa3
如果那一天到來,不要挽留我。11Please respect copyright.PENANA3PG68KEaJe
請你自由的、幸福的跟另外一個人生活下去吧。11Please respect copyright.PENANACYyHfmO6qU
我會在那裏望著你,微笑的,流淚的。11Please respect copyright.PENANA4sTx2unRxq
因為我從來就沒有資格擁有你,我只是自我滿足的活在自己認為的幸福時光裡罷了。11Please respect copyright.PENANAupIFgbnInM
11Please respect copyright.PENANA3SfhZsjcEH
奢望什麼的也只是虛幻。11Please respect copyright.PENANAB7GLMP3EFa
我無法相信話語的真實。11Please respect copyright.PENANAhGVp5NkCF2
11Please respect copyright.PENANAYPInKYzVcV
我知道,你愛我。11Please respect copyright.PENANAHUVwutpRv7
可是「我愛你」,這是親人間也會說的話。11Please respect copyright.PENANAdnnhR7qMpk
我當然也從你口裡聽到。11Please respect copyright.PENANArHTiNcXbtW
在早上醒來時給我的早安吻,在下午你歸來的玄關門口的吻,在夜裡沉睡前的晚安吻。11Please respect copyright.PENANAvh1bJp28WR
你總是會說:「我愛你。」11Please respect copyright.PENANAsM4FfeR3EA
11Please respect copyright.PENANAokAAyszjSt
11Please respect copyright.PENANAxxoGxvQoVl
是的。11Please respect copyright.PENANA9LKl8qBAqp
你是愛我的,可是你不是愛我的。11Please respect copyright.PENANAE0UkzxOt40
那並非是我自己誤解。我總是看著你,總是微笑的看著,總是嬉鬧的看著你,總是在戰爭裡看著你。11Please respect copyright.PENANAydWS49nMWA
我無時不刻的看著你。所以很清楚,比你自己還清楚你自己。11Please respect copyright.PENANAFtWKWO5RZx
我們之間緊緊聯繫的,不過是名為親情的愛情。11Please respect copyright.PENANAUDzChkvL7k
11Please respect copyright.PENANAntcL9jcBVF
11Please respect copyright.PENANA5Wly2Fgb78
11Please respect copyright.PENANAzwggpWr5sk
0811Please respect copyright.PENANAH3rVo4l5o9
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『後日談』11Please respect copyright.PENANA1iX8UvKeH4
11Please respect copyright.PENANABG9TLvrUGb
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11Please respect copyright.PENANAeHyVF1H6VE
「喜歡你喔」他這麼說。11Please respect copyright.PENANAFZhVKBoQU3
他不著痕跡的回望,面前的兄長哼著歌。11Please respect copyright.PENANAeVp3k7s2T1
然後他又重複了一次。11Please respect copyright.PENANAWBGK55n43u
「嗯」即使那是沒有任何感情、單調的話語,只是重複音節發生振動的合成。11Please respect copyright.PENANAZWGgOvP09X
11Please respect copyright.PENANAp7KgjVOHsz
喜歡你喔,所以不會愛你喔。11Please respect copyright.PENANAkVHxQ3hEKu
基爾伯特哼著不成調的小曲,臉上滿是笑意。11Please respect copyright.PENANARWfnfkYkWi
11Please respect copyright.PENANAfyzvpObXL7
不知道什麼時候發現到的,可是已經為時已晚,那時兄長早就笑容滿面的將他從愛情裡排拒開。11Please respect copyright.PENANAFCrqJiU2KN
11Please respect copyright.PENANAzXzV6Ry49C
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0911Please respect copyright.PENANAF01rUtqIXj
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「十年」11Please respect copyright.PENANAH8VcLUtmyM
11Please respect copyright.PENANAU35RgyISVi
有一天他從廣播聽見一首來自東方國度的歌,淳厚的男歌手看似平淡的唱著那歌詞。11Please respect copyright.PENANAHUffj0b3QL
曲終時候,他忽然淚流滿面。11Please respect copyright.PENANAbMJbrPDx8K
就在他幾乎無法反應的片刻。11Please respect copyright.PENANA9S1YWgFKVq
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熱辣的液體不斷從體內湧出,喉嚨彷彿被壓抑著,嘶啞不成調。11Please respect copyright.PENANANKDH9ZcAqL
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因為太感同身受了。11Please respect copyright.PENANAQPluMAjNNa
他和路德分開的時間以人類而言是那麼久,自然,有很多事情已經不像他記憶那樣的美好。11Please respect copyright.PENANADGW0oH37sh
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幾十年前他們是兄弟是親人,所以能夠牽手,能夠擁抱,能夠親吻。11Please respect copyright.PENANALY0FAs1xmE
現在,他們仍然是親人、兄弟,可以牽手、擁抱,但卻也沒有親吻過彼此。11Please respect copyright.PENANA8JFOA1e9UH
就像是緊守著什麼界線,彼此誰也沒有越過的意思。11Please respect copyright.PENANA1M3HUEtAZ7
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只是一廂情願的愛戀罷了。基爾伯特淺笑地望著窗外那一片青空。11Please respect copyright.PENANAdBcaWPkjCO
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那些在彼此生命裡空白的日子,他就像是戀愛的人一樣,一直渴望著見到他,一直在被剝削的勞力中自我安慰,一直、一直維持著自己的意志,在配合可笑的服從中,盡力維持著自己的意識,也許是曉得一旦遺忘,他就再也不可能回到路德身邊的緣故。11Please respect copyright.PENANAOTn2bL9mHQ
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但像這種自以為是的愛情,怎麼可能會得到相等的回報?11Please respect copyright.PENANANQ6m08WSQL
他似乎想的太過美好了,就像那道牆破碎以後,就認為一切都可以海闊天空,哪知道,無論在哪都沒有差。11Please respect copyright.PENANAt1XGVz2Ubj
他始終是,一個人。11Please respect copyright.PENANANimgM7qDd7
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他卻天真以為,能夠讓對方愛上自己。11Please respect copyright.PENANA3G3fnGt8S7
明明他們之間除了兄弟的親情之外,什麼也不剩。11Please respect copyright.PENANAVF6Ye9fhYQ
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1011Please respect copyright.PENANA9fKqEsYgcD
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他決定要去旅行。11Please respect copyright.PENANACWsLcHEVXL
趁著那一天弟弟加班的日子,他簡單收拾了行李,和家裏養著的狗一一道別之後,他關上家門,最後看了一眼他一定不會再開啟的門,而後邁步往街上走去。11Please respect copyright.PENANAzkiTIUsedu
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路德也許會生氣吧。11Please respect copyright.PENANActMeXKoXkQ
基爾伯特悠閒地走在路邊,一邊淡淡想著。11Please respect copyright.PENANAH5cPSylbzn
不過,他不會解釋的,也不會後悔的。11Please respect copyright.PENANA6w7KY4IFaS
哼著不知打哪學會的曲調,午後的陽光撒在他背上,熠熠生輝。11Please respect copyright.PENANA4JslZCTM0H
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路德維希一如往常因為加班的緣故晚到了家。11Please respect copyright.PENANAmEorIdOIKY
在還沒打開家門口的時候,他還在想要怎麼跟兄長解釋,然後一開門入眼的卻是一整片黑暗。11Please respect copyright.PENANA7fcG9RXTCu
他思緒有些混雜的楞在家門口,半晌無法言語。11Please respect copyright.PENANAg4id6j0hNS
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家裏養著的三隻狗衝上前趴住他。11Please respect copyright.PENANASfVxL3XYZj
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基爾伯特的身影幾乎消失。11Please respect copyright.PENANALRJwtELJWm
那之後他走遍了住家周圍,甚至在後面幾天不斷搜尋著,用網路、用人力,但是彷彿電腦裡的資料被消除後的乾淨,到處都找不到他的兄長,雖然偶而會接獲零星的消息說在哪有誰曾見過他的行蹤,他也曾前往該地,但一切一切卻像是被嘲笑一樣的徒勞無功。11Please respect copyright.PENANAGydESCtjqf
他感到十分焦躁,甚至湧上不安的思緒。11Please respect copyright.PENANAepKmlL6vyu
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「你有見過這個男人嗎?」11Please respect copyright.PENANAXQ3TUVSOK8
他在街上隨意攔截了某位路人,並從懷裡掏出那張因為過於頻繁使用充滿皺摺的相片問著對方。11Please respect copyright.PENANAYzM2L4u0rB
搖搖頭,被他攔下的人表示從未見過。11Please respect copyright.PENANAqlrp8KnP1o
「……謝謝。不好意思,打擾您的時間了。」11Please respect copyright.PENANAqtj273ZLna
也許是疑惑,離開前那路人還頻頻回望他幾眼,大約是在想這人是怪人嘛,尋人這事不是要找警察解決的嗎。11Please respect copyright.PENANAz7rzncsJ94
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他收起相片,忖思。11Please respect copyright.PENANAd4wmBiO6GS
已經找了這麼多年,從那天兄長消失在家中開始,他就拿著這張很久前兄長拍攝下的個人照,在他放假時候到各個地點去尋找。11Please respect copyright.PENANAJjJ9hIPWvI
但是,得到的答案總是千篇一律,他們從未見過他。11Please respect copyright.PENANACMTEr0Q6jE
伊莉莎白跟羅德里赫也勸過他該放棄了,因為死心總比冀望那幾乎不存在的希望來的好。11Please respect copyright.PENANAjKX22SvCNj
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也許是該放棄的時候了。ns 15.158.61.55da2